Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[Debbzie]

Hi all,Just need a little help!?,if someone can!..

So i was due to come on my period on 12th dec.. but was stunned when i found blood on my underwear on the 1st dec.. Now my periods are always 10days LATE!.. ive never ever been early !.. Me & my other half are ttc... been trying for months now!... Nothing seems to be happening much... so as ive started bleeding early i was wondering what it was??? im not thinking about it,so that couldnt of triggered my AF to come,(if it is AF,that is)

Someone please help!... Thank You !

How close to the bleeding did you dtd? It could be many things...the top 2 common ones are implantation, a small tear from dtd (TMI: had my first one since I started dtd with my DH even before we started to TTC from not using enough lub). Some women also start spotting pre- AF during 2ww. Good luck getting the answer

period log is:

july 1,2012
aug 11 (41days)
oct4 (54days)
Nov 1 (28days)
dec 2, (32days)

It started red spotting,then a gush... then stopped,i wiped an there was a pink smear.... then it was brown when it come back.
then stopped,and then red.
its not like my usual periods ive had,and im never ever early or anything.. i have no pain or anything... when im about to get AF i usually get very bad lower back & stomach cramps,but nothing

So yeah,Im abit confused... i think i OVULATED twice this month too !

Thanks

 

[Debbzie]

dtd - 10,14,21 novemeber

 

[tannielicious]

Here's my vent for today :-

I am tired of people telling me that because I am only 30, I shouldn't worry about failing to conceive after two years of trying... I am tired of people saying stay positive it would happen and oh - these same people are the ones who have all gotten preggers at a drop of the hat... Lastly, I am so tired that after two years of trying ... we are no where close to finding answers as to why we are failing to conceive and hearing bad news after bad news

 

[m4e]

I guess this isn't really a vent, but today I'm just depressed... It's probably mostly hormones, but I just feel like my life is over, like nothing good is ever going to happen for me. Kids are the one thing I've ever really wanted...and I'm probably never going to have any... I'm too heart broken to vent... venting requires frustration. Today I'm just sad.

 

[Nazz4]

I guess this isn't really a vent, but today I'm just depressed... It's probably mostly hormones, but I just feel like my life is over, like nothing good is ever going to happen for me. Kids are the one thing I've ever really wanted...and I'm probably never going to have any... I'm too heart broken to vent... venting requires frustration. Today I'm just sad.

Just curious- is adopting out of the question? I know it's a big decision.

 

[m4e]

I guess this isn't really a vent, but today I'm just depressed... It's probably mostly hormones, but I just feel like my life is over, like nothing good is ever going to happen for me. Kids are the one thing I've ever really wanted...and I'm probably never going to have any... I'm too heart broken to vent... venting requires frustration. Today I'm just sad.

Just curious- is adopting out of the question? I know it's a big decision.

I don't think I have it in me, at least not now. I want my own, and since I still say that I know that I can't adopt a baby. It wouldn't be fair to them. I would love them so much, but I don't want there to be ANY possibility of them knowing that they were the back up plan.
And practically, it costs SO MUCH to adopt.

 

[Nazz4]

Idk, I think all adopted kids know they are a back up plan. Two of my best friends growing up were adopted and although they knew they were a back up plan they still loved their parents and their parents loved them. The way I see it is that the parents and kids gave each other something they didn't have- a family. One of my friends had a phase for a minute where she wanted to find her birth parents, but she quickly realized that they were not able to bring her up and wanted a better life for her, so she decided to leave it alone. I know you say that they wouldn't feel like your own, but everyone I have talked to who adopted said the kid feels like their own, not at all someone elses. I guess most people I know adopted babies that were just a few days old though. People would even tell my friends and their moms that they look just alike and they would start cracking up. I can see adopting an older kid not feeling like your own though. Of course I don't think you should do anything you don't feel is right, but if I were you I would think about it at least. I think it's better than not having a kid.

 

[m4e]

I think it is better too. I just have to make sure I can do it. I think the infertility thing hits me harder than most people, and I know myself well enough to know that if I don't make absolutely sure I can gracefully and loving raise another person's child that that child will know that I adopted them for ME, to fill the empty space in MY life, not to fill the empty place in theirs. My husband and I always wanted to adopt after we had "our own" kids. That I know I could do, because I wouldn't be looking to them to fix my life. Adopting right now for me would be just that. I hope that if we never have our own that I can be at peace enough with it to adopt, but for now I just know it would be wrong.

 

[Mimzy3]

I think it is better too. I just have to make sure I can do it. I think the infertility thing hits me harder than most people, and I know myself well enough to know that if I don't make absolutely sure I can gracefully and loving raise another person's child that that child will know that I adopted them for ME, to fill the empty space in MY life, not to fill the empty place in theirs. My husband and I always wanted to adopt after we had "our own" kids. That I know I could do, because I wouldn't be looking to them to fix my life. Adopting right now for me would be just that. I hope that if we never have our own that I can be at peace enough with it to adopt, but for now I just know it would be wrong.

m4e

I totally understand where you are coming from! I wouldn't adopt either (well lest thats how i feel now) because of those very reasons. I want my own and i want to be pregnant and deliver a baby... have all of that!

I always say if we end up not having children then we are just going to live our life "selfishly" take a lot of vacations buy the kind of cars we always wanted and stuff like that. Because we won't have another human being to be responsible for. Of course I just tell myself this to make myself feel better. Truth is nothing will fill that void, nothing you can buy or do will... Lest for now thats how i'm feeling. Hopefully if i have to face that realization that we won't have children I can come to peace with it eventually.

 

[BrollyDolly]

Usual vent but so p***ed off! 3rd person in 3 days to announce their happy news on facebook!! I am pretty sure the entire site is just mocking me lately

 

[Pink Petals]

I think it is better too. I just have to make sure I can do it. I think the infertility thing hits me harder than most people, and I know myself well enough to know that if I don't make absolutely sure I can gracefully and loving raise another person's child that that child will know that I adopted them for ME, to fill the empty space in MY life, not to fill the empty place in theirs. My husband and I always wanted to adopt after we had "our own" kids. That I know I could do, because I wouldn't be looking to them to fix my life. Adopting right now for me would be just that. I hope that if we never have our own that I can be at peace enough with it to adopt, but for now I just know it would be wrong.

I totally hear you and I feel the same way. I don't think I will adopt if we aren't able to have our own. It's not right for everyone. I might change my mind down the road, but that is how I feel right now.

If your heart is still set on having your own children, then continue to pursue that path. Your journey is not over until you decide it's over!

 

[Nazz4]

I'm the same way, I would also want to have my own kids before adopting... I've never gotten far enough in my head to think about if we can't have kids would we adopt so I can't really say how I would feel about that. I remember when I was younger I said if I couldn't have kids I would just get a lot of land and adopt a ton of dogs! lol Now that idea seems crazy, I like having only 1-2 dogs, that's enough for me!

I actually have a crazy story, we had these family friends who couldn't have kids.. they were trying for years. They finally decided to adopt a boy, the process of course takes a long long time so they got the paper work done and everything, they were approved. My family was still praying for them to be able to have a child and boom... she got pregnant with a girl! So their adopted child and their birth child are about the same age, only a few months apart! I think it's the cutest story ever!

 

[tamithomas]

Dear body: Please stop this. Do not give me false hope symptoms with AF type cramps a few days after dtd. You've done this to me so many times in the passed, I'm so over it. Give me either full blown pregnancy symptoms or nothing at all.

 

[cntrygrl]

m4e-- Your situation is so rare and hard. I'm very sorry for you. If you haven't already I would start doing some research online. Maybe there's massages or acupuncture that could help your DH. I would definitely talk to more doctors there has to be one out there that would see your case as a challenge and want to tackle it.

 

[Mimzy3]

Dear body: Please stop this. Do not give me false hope symptoms with AF type cramps a few days after dtd. You've done this to me so many times in the passed, I'm so over it. Give me either full blown pregnancy symptoms or nothing at all.

I am sooo with you on this!! I want full blown... i'm talking blue veiny boobs, morning sickness, sense of smell through the roof! Bring it on!! LOL

 

[tamithomas]

Today's rant is not much of a rant, more of a confession of guilt. About two-three weeks ago we found out a male friend of ours who had lived on the one night stand lifestyle for 10 years suddenly got a girlfriend and within three months of being together he was going to be a dad in 7 months. Well, she was rushed to the ER last night in emergency surgery for ectopic pregnancy.

I feel soo guilty about cursing about them and feeling so pissed at them for being BFP first. No one no matter what deserves to miscarry. Even though I don't know the girlfriend, I wish her speedy recovery.

 

[Fizzyfefe]

Stop lying to me, FertilityFriend! I am NOT at my most fertile! I am not ovulating - the doctor has confirmed this - and I am still bleeding!

Gaaaaah!

 

[Nazz4]

Why is it that whenever I look up stuff about ectopic'sl I read that it's very rare and probably won't happen... but you hear about it happening so much?

 

[flagirlie7]

Random vent: Bestie, I know you are pretty new to your only second relationship in your life and I am very happy for you. However, please don't neglect EVERYTHING else in your life. Do spend more time with your children, do work out sometimes and get serious about your career!!! And please don't rub in my face how you're having sex like 4 times a day and even on BC, worried about getting pregnant (especially since you just changed brands and they told you to use back-up BC for a week, which I am pretty SURE you are NOT) when you know I am trying TTC and my DH has a low drive...

 

[Amelia8083]

My rant is for 2012. Just want to say that I know things can ALWAYS get worse but.......you sucked big time. I mean REALLY sucked and I can't wait to see you go. I am always thankful for the health of my loved ones and pets, thats what matters most to me. But this year started with the passing of a fur baby, random health issues for me, my grandmother falling ill, high family stress, watching 2 coworkers get pregnant and one have their baby( making sure to rub it in my face every chance she got because.....she's just not a good person). MIL still has cancer. Hubby has spent the whole year trying to be supportive and has had to deal with my ttc depression. And this is life and I know that..... but when you have spent at least 20 months of your life wondering, is this the month? while everyone gets pregnant around you and its just not happening for you.... everything else just seems extra sh***y. So theres my rant.... 2012 you blew. With that said, I thank god every day for what I do have and what I did have. Just felt good to get it out.