Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[tamithomas]

tamithomas - Try your best not to worry over what is yet to happen. Hopefully they will just want something from you (which will be annoying, but much easier to deal with). Fingers crossed for you and let us know how you get on.

Hope you're right, hope my woman's intuition is wrong for once lol. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed with it being that our truck decided it would be awesome for the breaks and hand break to bust at the same time on the road which does 90km/h speed limit which is the scariest moment of my life (Everyone is safe thank goodness) so the thought of being stuck with another bfp announcement is the last thing i want right now

In theory I guess I should be more considerate towards people with secondary infertility, and who knows maybe these are step-kids I'm seeing, but bringing your 2-year old with you to the fertility clinic seems like a slap in the face to someone who's been working on #1 for 6 years!!!

Wow yea, that is definitely very stabby and bitchy thing for that woman to do. Second infertility woman want some respect and claim to be misunderstood on the TTC world, at least be willing to show it first! (I know the one at your doctors office doesn't speak for all second infertility but still...not the first time I hear stories like this)

 

[mapletulip]

tamithomas - Try your best not to worry over what is yet to happen. Hopefully they will just want something from you (which will be annoying, but much easier to deal with). Fingers crossed for you and let us know how you get on.

Hope you're right, hope my woman's intuition is wrong for once lol. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed with it being that our truck decided it would be awesome for the breaks and hand break to bust at the same time on the road which does 90km/h speed limit which is the scariest moment of my life (Everyone is safe thank goodness) so the thought of being stuck with another bfp announcement is the last thing i want right now

In theory I guess I should be more considerate towards people with secondary infertility, and who knows maybe these are step-kids I'm seeing, but bringing your 2-year old with you to the fertility clinic seems like a slap in the face to someone who's been working on #1 for 6 years!!!

Wow yea, that is definitely very stabby and bitchy thing for that woman to do. Second infertility woman want some respect and claim to be misunderstood on the TTC world, at least be willing to show it first! (I know the one at your doctors office doesn't speak for all second infertility but still...not the first time I hear stories like this)

I feel like such a bad person to admit this, but I can't stand the threads on this forum of women who are 'struggling' to conceive number #3 or #4. Or the other day, DH said that he knows other people who are struggling too...so I asked: number 1? He said no. So I said: then they can shut up! I know...not my most gracious moment.

I bet their hearts ache for another baby, yet for us it's just different. We are not moms yet or we are moms of angel babies. If you get to tuck a little one in each night, you have a child. Can't they just count that GIGANTIC blessing?

(and maybe we should count ours too...having a lovely partner for instance and even being able to ttc).

 

[ashntony]

Ladies I hope you won't judge me for what I'm about to post but.... there is this guy that i work with that doesn't know when to shut his mouth... He has made many comments about my weight he also talks about his sex life all of the time.... Well the other day I was talking to a fellow coworker of mine that knows my dj and i are struggling to concieve... well he walks in on our conversation and says well my cf thinks she is pregnant... she is so happy... i jst walked away bc he strted the whole it'll happen soon. Two days later he came in and said she had miscarried. I like an ass just said oh and walked away... i felt like a jerk for acting that way but the jealousy monster started jumping up and down with joy. I feel horrible for even having rhe feeling.... i hate bein so nice.

 

[Bananas4Baby]

Hey everyone, hope everyone is having a blessed day.

I watched one of my good friends go through her fourth pregnancy. Yes, she has 4 beautiful children...I know I should be happy for her, but I have yet to travel down and see the newest member. In fact I have made it a point to not be available to see her when she visits her family here.
I feel bad for not seeing her, but I sent a bb shower gift. Isn't that enough?

Also, got a BFN this week....slowly letting depression set in. I thought for sure I was this time, even hubbins thought so.

Trying not to focus on all of that right now, I don't feel I have the strength left to deal with another disappointment. I guess that's why I'm here...to vent and hope that works.

Sending out

 

[tamithomas]

Ladies I hope you won't judge me for what I'm about to post but.... there is this guy that i work with that doesn't know when to shut his mouth... He has made many comments about my weight he also talks about his sex life all of the time.... Well the other day I was talking to a fellow coworker of mine that knows my dj and i are struggling to concieve... well he walks in on our conversation and says well my cf thinks she is pregnant... she is so happy... i jst walked away bc he strted the whole it'll happen soon. Two days later he came in and said she had miscarried. I like an ass just said oh and walked away... i felt like a jerk for acting that way but the jealousy monster started jumping up and down with joy. I feel horrible for even having rhe feeling.... i hate bein so nice.

Don't feel bad. I was in the same position a couple of months ago with the guy who had been jumping vagina to vagina for 10 years suddenly settles down and within 3 months of being with his first girlfriend in 10 years she was bfp, lost it through ecto. Part of me was sad but other part of me felt it was karma that it wasn't fair for him to get that type of chance so easily.

This is what the venting thread is for, it's where all judgement is left at the door. If your situation is anything like mine, expect a bfp announcement again in the next month or two. We're here for you

 

[AlyCon]

Seasonal depression sucks! It went from being warm and sunny over here to raining all day everyday FOR A WEEK STRAIGHT. As a result I've spent the past week in bed being a grouch, sleeping, yelling at DH anytime he comes near me, crying because I had a sad dream, getting annoyed at everything, I haven't cooked or cleaned at all, and I haven't even gone to the gym but I still lost three pounds because I've barely been eating. Im so upset I'd seriously rather have it snow again. I don't know about others who struggle with this but for me rain is ten times worse than snow and cold.

 

[AJnJJ2008]

Ok, I'm seriously going to flip my shit if another person tells me I "just need to have sex more"!

 

[hettious]

so my landlady's grand daughter who is a very close friend just aborted her 4th pregnancy since I met her 2years ago,am so angry but can't show it,why does God let those who don't want kids get pregnant so easliy ?

 

[tamithomas]

Another pregnant smoker at the grocery store yesterday. She couldn't be bothered to lift stuff to put in the car by having someone else do it but had no problem smoking. And I know it wasn't a slip up smoke, which is usually forgivable if it's just one, but I saw the pack of smokes in her shirt pocket peaking out.

Priorities, learn them!

ps apologies in advance for being super judgemental. Usually those types of women don't bother me, I usually just think it's their business whatever. But having one of those periods of time where seeing women be careless makes me want to flip lids.

 

[Bananas4Baby]

Ok, I'm seriously going to flip my shit if another person tells me I "just need to have sex more"!

Ha! Amen! or "relax and it'll happen in God's time". Don't patronize me...I'm a grown woman.

to you!

 

[AJnJJ2008]

Ok, I'm seriously going to flip my shit if another person tells me I "just need to have sex more"!

Ha! Amen! or "relax and it'll happen in God's time". Don't patronize me...I'm a grown woman.

to you!

The best part? One is 5 months pregnant...and didn't even have to try.

 

[Bananas4Baby]

Ok, I'm seriously going to flip my shit if another person tells me I "just need to have sex more"!

Ha! Amen! or "relax and it'll happen in God's time". Don't patronize me...I'm a grown woman.

to you!

The best part? One is 5 months pregnant...and didn't even have to try.

Yeah I don't think people should be throwing advice around especially if the know you are trying to conceive. I really would rather have people not say anything to me about it, then have them try to "fix the problem." Sometimes I feel like a dumb little girl with how people try to "fix" things...let me do it unless you know what I am experiencing. Then talk to me..

 

[Jett55]

Another friend preg with their second I'm happy for her but I feel so selfish wanting to cry just ready for my turn

 

[ashntony]

5 days until testing. I don't think i got lucky either

 

[AJnJJ2008]

5 days until testing. I don't think i got lucky either

We are really close in start date of TTC and cycles...AF is scheduled Wed. for me. And all though we technically NTNP in August 2012 we actually started in Sept. FX for you!

 

[Jett55]

Another rant I got told today that if I quit trying it'll happen seems to be fertiles famous line makes me wanna slam my head against a wall

 

[tamithomas]

To anyone who is ttc and dealing with IF while having a step kid in the house, I bow down to you honestly..I don't know how you do it. DH just talks about his daughter and I get biting my tongue almost bleeding jealous that he knows he's had a kid yet here I am feeling alone. Especially when we visit friends who have kids, my DH includes himself and I always end up feeling like a 3rd wheel.

 

[VP1228]

To anyone who is ttc and dealing with IF while having a step kid in the house, I bow down to you honestly..I don't know how you do it. DH just talks about his daughter and I get biting my tongue almost bleeding jealous that he knows he's had a kid yet here I am feeling alone. Especially when we visit friends who have kids, my DH includes himself and I always end up feeling like a 3rd wheel.

I can't say I know exactly how you feel about the step kid thing but I do know how it feels to be a third wheel when people who have kids or are pregnant can talk about it but we can't. I have had people ask me multiple times why do I want a baby at 22 (I will be 23 in Dec) when I am still a "child" myself. I really didn't know that you have to be a certain age to have a baby. Anyway I understand your pain and frustration. I try to stay clear of things like that.

 

[AlyCon]

I agree, tamithomas and VP1228!! I was with my friend who was in second tri and the other girl literally JUST got her BFP the week before and ALL they talked about was pregnancy!! I never felt so left out before in my life! And yea at 19 people make those comments about me being too young but I've learned to ignore them.

I also hate when people who are pregnant complain around me and then say "you'll understand when you're pregnant" or "just wait until you're pregnant" idk why that bothers me so much but it does!!

 

[tamithomas]

Don't get me started on the age related issue..I turned 23 in February and I get the "Why would you want a kid so young? You should be out there enjoying life" having a kid IS my version of enjoying life. We're financially well off, a roof over our heads, plenty of love to give...yet most people my age who I see get bfp accidentally have none of those. Why do people feel the need to tell those who are ready that they shouldn't yet applaud those who do get bfp calling it a "miracle"? No joke, my step sister in law got bfp at 18 still lived at my moms place, no job, my step brother only had a part timer and didn't know how to hold a penny if their life depended on it. But according to her family, it was a miracle sent from God. They brought out the pitchforks and knives when my mom just so much as mentioned other options then keeping it.

Wow I went off track there...sorry about that lol, but bottom line: Unless it's like a 12 year old, if the couple wants to ttc and have all the means to raise the child who are they to judge?