ttc#1 new looking for buddy!

[MH5280]

Me and my husband have already decided on names for a boy or a girl!! haha! now we just need them to be here! he always refers to our future child by name! I love it!

 

[Jules8]

I like Berlin..I think that would be a great name.

We have a girl name picked, but not a boy name. My husband has a hyphen in his name so we came up with Emma-leigh Marie. I love it! His middle name is Jacob so I want to use that as a first or middle name...just haven't figured out a fun name to go with it. Good thing we have some time! Lol

 

[MH5280]

Good morning ladies.... I'm here to "symptom spot"
Well my husband and I only had sex ONCE! 1 week ago today... I had my ultra sound that day and it showed I had an ovulation cyst. It was like cd13 or 14 maybe, well we had sex that day. This morning I go to the bathroom and when I wipe I have pink/white... Implantation??? Early period spotting??? I do feel a but crampy.... I say no way it's implantation. I know that's how it always happens is when your not trying but... Do you think???
So today I have to go in and get my blood drawn for a progesterone test.... Would that show pregnancy?? It's gotta be WAY to early to show. I'm supposed to start AF in like 8-9 days!

 

[Jules8]

The spotting could be a good sign! Though, I am not too sure about progesterone and pregnancy. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you!

 

[MH5280]

So my Dr called me, and said my progesterone test came back that I ovulated. which we kind of already knew

She got the results of my husbands SA... and his morphology, the shape of sperms, is low. at 2% and they consider anything user 5% to be low. so now she is referring us to an infertility dr.
However, I haven't told my husband about this yet, hes at work, and id rather tell him in person. I have sooooo many f-ing emotions right now! like, I really kind of wish it was me who had something wrong, so that I can take control and do these things to fix it... but since its him, I know im gonna have to be on him to get this shit done. and I know hes gonna want to wait until we are back out in Colorado to continue any care... which does make sense, but I just wanna get this shit over with! my BIGGEST fear, is my husband not being able to give me a child... like.. I have no idea what i would do if that happened. he needs to continue with the process, and I want him to WANT to continue. I know he wants kids, but his whole thinking has always been, "it will happen when it happens" like NO!! we Clearly need to be doing something to help us!! well I feel like I had more to say, but my mom called and I lost my train of thought!! haha! oh! but I did google morphology, and it says things like toxins, heat, or genetics can cause abnormal morphology, and things like sitting at a desk at work all day can cause heat in the testes. and that's exactly what my husband does! but how do you fix that?!?!?! its his JOB!
I really don't want to tell my husband this when he gets home tonight! hes not one to show emotions and ive been crying about it already and I know him, and he'll just shrug his shoulders and say "oh well" or something along those line... NO YOU ASSHOLE!!!! THIS IS SERIOUS AND YOU BETTER DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! ugh! im your wife!! tell me how you really feel about all this! I know work is stressful, but this is your home life, so you need to deal with it!.... maybe ill just tell him that! maybe ill have him just read this post! haha!! also I NEVER cry in front of him, and I don't want to now.. but im sure I will..

on another note. I think I told you guys, idk, but I had pink/white stuff on Tuesday morning... well ive had nothing since then, and then this morning my FMU I had actual red blood.... nothing else has really happened. I still have 7 days til AF.. maybe im pregnant!!! I DOUBT IT! I asked the dr about it when I was on the phone with her, and told her I do spot but its usually brown and 2-3 days before AF, she said it could be stress and not to worry or get too excited yet.... thanks bitch. lol ugh! F today! im so over life!! I just want to move home to Colorado like NOW! So our lives will be better and we can continue this whole infertility shit.... im sorry I cuss a lot!
Thanks for letting me vent! I feel like I really need ya'lls help/advice... even tho there really isn't much you guys can do for me! lol ugh! just saying or typing the word "infertility" makes me cry!! WHYYYYYY!!!!! GAH!

 

[MamaBunny2]

Oh I'm so sorry Now you know and (HE) can hopefully start being proactive to help things! I wouldn't get angry with him, like for how he reacts or whatever. I think the more calm and encouraging you are the better... but I don't know your DH so it's just a blind suggestion. I can totally understand your frustrations. I'm sure he will have a lot of feelings as well regarding the results, but likely hold them in as men tend to do. I'm hoping this is something he is willing to work on because I'm sure it doesn't repair itself overnight If his balls are extra warm, give him an ice pack for Valentines Day and cool those suckers off! (Sorry that's the first thing I thought of when I read about his 'sit at a desk job') And about your spotting... you never know! I spotted the month I fell pregnant and I have had spotting before AF showed during previous cycles as well. Fingers crossed, it IS possible! Perhaps research and inform yourself about what CAN be done to help this situation, that way when you talk to your DH and he's ready and willing to discuss options you aren't totally blindsided and overwhelmed with negative emotion? Lots of hugs

 

[MH5280]

Thank you!!! Your totally right I shouldn't be angry at him. He just NEVER EVER shares how he's felling, he more just shuts down. I need him to not do that now! And I'll just calmly tell him that. I love the ice pack idea!! Hahaha! That's hilarious! "Here babe sit on this at work!" Haha!

 

[Jules8]

Michele- I am so sorry! Ughh!! It is so much easier when it is something in your control, but when it is someone else it is so much more stressful!! Like me filling out applications for my husband because I think I can make it sound better than he can. Haha! Tell your husband to wear loose undies...no tighty whities! Cool showers and quite a few vitamins can help as well. If all else fails there is also IUI, which is considerably cheaper than most fertility treatments and very easy. Hang in there lady! It is fixable....relax.
On a side note: Guess who else may be moving to Colorado? Me! I have a friend out there and she has been convincing us to make the move. I am super nervous about it all and not sure how we will afford it, but I am determined to make it work. Hopefully we will be out there sometime in the summer. I feel bad leaving my family behind, that is the absolute hardest thing because we are all so close. Also, DH is an only child and his parents will be devastated. I just feel so stuck here in PA. My degree is useless here, but everything will transfer in CO. I feel like once I have a teaching job ready to go it will make the decision that much easier.

 

[TTTTina]

I'm sorry Michele my guy would have the same thinking too and he doesn't like to really say how he feels neither. I understand. I told him I'd want him to to an SA in a few months if we still haven't got pregnant and he said okay. I hope you can get this all taken care of!!

 

[EJK3]

Hello all, I am new at this but was wondering if I could please join in this ttc group. I am ttc #3 on cycle 7. Elle

 

[MamaBunny2]

Been thinking about you! Hoping everything went ok yesterday with your DH

 

[MH5280]

Awe! thank you ladies! it went as expected, not much of a reaction, and he said we should wait til we move. I told him ok but when we move I NEED him to continue this and not keep pushing it off, as it can take some time.

Jules - hes been working on the undies thing! he has to wear boxer briefs to work tho, cuz he says reg boxers are too annoying under jeans.. other wise he's either commando or in boxers at home!!
OH MY GOSH!!! MOVE TO COLORADO!!! I'll be your friend there too!! haha! do you know where at you guys would live? I promise you both would LOVE it! girl its been in the 60's-70's this whole time we've been freezing out tushies off! haha! omg this makes me so excited, even tho we don't physically know each other, I feel like my friend is moving with me! haha!

Tina- glad he is on board! Id suggest not waiting too long! that's the advice ive always gotten from a friend who has done IVF 3 times herself, although it was her, not her husband, but she said she always wished they didn't wait so long to go to the dr!

AF is surly on her way, obvi! we only had sex once, but I am sooo emotional.... although in the WAAAY back of my head, I have a little hope that "oh we weren't trying so now is when it will happen" but my husband little guys might have a different plan!

Any Valentines day plans??? none for us, I think ill just be cooking dinner at home for the two of us! hopefully we can get some romance in, and love each other... just haven't felt it lately

 

[Jules8]

Happy Monday!.....Siiiiiiike! I did not want to move out of bed this morning. The weather seriously felt like -20 when I got up, now it has warmed up to a whole -14. WTH!!
Not a whole lot going on with me. I have had some serious sore bbs the past 3 days...I always do right before af so she should be right around the corner.

On a good note, me and hubby had an awesome weekend just staying in and snuggling. It was really nice to unwind and relax for a change.

EJK- Welcome!

Michele- If we moved out there it would probably be in the Loveland area. Now I just have to find a teaching job, an affordable appt, and oh yeah..convince hubby to come with me. He said he would go anywhere as long as it's with me...awww. Then changes his mind 5 minutes later that he does not want to move that far away from family. He grew up just him and his parents so he wants our kids to grow up with cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents nearby. I understand, but he is making the decision even harder. I just want him to say lets go and make me feel good about the decision. lol

I hope you had a good weekend with your hubby! I am sending you good thoughts!

 

[MH5280]

Our valentines day sucked. I think it was me. Just grumpy. But Sunday was a great day!!
He wanted to go buy a bunch of new boxers! That made me happy! Haha! And then yesterday we were at lunch and this little girl, like a year old, was at the table next to us... He stared at her like the whole time and just talked about her and was so in awe of her! it made me sad!! But also melted my heart! He talked about what kind of dad he would be to a little girl! .... Even tho I'm upset about our whole ttc situation, I love that man! And I think honestly after hearing HE had the problem it made me mad at HIM. That's terrible I know! But the few days after I was just in a terrible mood and depressed and mad at him! I'm still upset but after we talked Sunday I feel better, I know he's making an effort!

We did our taxes this weekend and he said we need to buy a house and have a baby so we can get some tax breaks haha! But that's one thing I'm not sure about... Does he think it's not a big problem?? Like to me, I see it as, now we have a 2% chance of getting pregnant... I don't think he see's it that way. But all he'll say is "it is what it is" and we can do what we can. :/ Bleh! But regardless I'm happy in the meantime he is trying to change some things!

AF is due for me Thursday and so far I've had random spotting like every other day since tuesday. I'm sure she will arrive cuz there's no way she doesnt! I'm ready for her to be gone already! Lol!

 

[Jules8]

Michele- I think that TTC is a stressful experience, but when it takes longer or fertility issues get in the way, it can be very trying on a marriage. I am sure he is feeling guilty. Men tend to bottle it up and pretend that things don't bother them as a defense mechanism. I think it's a pride thing.
Don't feel bad about being upset, it is a natural thing to do. Finding out that there is a problem with him can be way more emotional due to not knowing how to fix it. It's frustrating! Hang in there girly, we are here for you!

AFM- I usually have sore bbs before af, but geez they have been sore yesterday and today. I am trying to ignore it, but it seriously feels like someone used them as a punching bag. Anyone else have a random month where they are more sore than others? I took a test yesterday...bfn of course. I have 1 more test, I am refusing to use it til Thursday. lol

 

[MamaBunny2]

I was just browsing on Google and came across this:

https://community.babycenter.com/post/a34943182/2_morphology

The OP was concerned because her DH had 2% morphology results and was looking for answers as to if they had any chance of conceiving naturally. As I scrolled down the responses I noticed she actually ended up getting her not too long after the post! One responder said her DH had 1% morphology and they conceived twice! So don't get discouraged or give up hope

 

[MH5280]

I love you girls!! Your all so encouraging! And it's really helpful!! So THANK YOU!!!

Jyllian that's amazing!!! Fx!! Maybe it'll happen!
I read one thing that said new sperm arrives like every 70 some days, so some people get retested after 2 months.

Jules- my boobs are usually sore, but I do have some months where it's like the worst thing ever! And I've had to sleep in a sports bra! And it hurt to shower! Anything hurt! When is AF due? Maybe there is still hope!!!

 

[Luckybug]

FX for you guys!

 

[TTTTina]

Sometimes my boobs hurt before af and sometimes they dont. So I couldn't go by sore boobs for a pregnancy symptom for me lol

 

[Jules8]

It is pretty typical that they hurt a few days before, it was just way more intense this time. I had a migraine last night with cramps and a temp dip this morning so af should be on her way today or tomorrow. I am blaming it all on this hormone imbalance. lol I know not to symptom spot, i just always hold on to that sliver of hope.