Bonnie,
I think that if you start now is a great plan and of course vent all you want this is what the board is for, among other reasons. However, if tonight DB does not "help" please relax and be positive I am sure you will still be fine in terms of timing.
Now, let's see if I can be of help here and make a suggestion to see if it works for you. It looks like I may be more like your DB in the sense that I dont like to feel forced to BD nor I like to BD every day. I like to do it when it feels natural. I may sound too harsh here but despite my complaints, i absolutely love to BD with DH...just not the way we are doing at the moment.
With that said, I WANT TO GET PREGNANT FAST, for many reasons (unlike with my previous two when I did not care if it happened right away). So, I rationalized this a lot and my BD this month was pure strategy to get knocked up FAST in order to avoid the scheduled BD in future time. I know that for most people, to become pregnant, they need to BD a lot. So, my thought process this month was:
"OK, let's just do it all the time this cycle, it is a huge effort for me but if it works I dont have to go through this again" (again I love to be with DH but not scheduled, honestly - takes a lot from it for me, at least).
So, today will be our 5th day of BD in a row (yes, I am determined to do it even know I am pretty certain i am DPO) plus we BD EOD before the past 5 days for quite a bit of time too. CRAZY schedule for me!!!!!!!!!
Also, if it does not work, it proves that perhaps BD every day is not the way to go so I will not feel on every cycle that I could have done more ...you know what I mean?
So, my take is that, perhaps, you can try to rationalize the schedule to your DB, letting him know that you understand that it is not appealing to BD when it is all scheduled but if he gives you the best effort this cycle you may just get knocked up rather quickly and not have to schedule BD again in the future. This is a very logical explanation that he may go for. If he is like me, he will see the panic of what's to come (again I dont really mean this to sound like BD is a torture - i feel confident that you know what I mean) and put an extraordinary effort this one cycle. Once you are preggo, you can go back to BD when you feel like it and it feels natural.
With that said, we all know that even BD every day is no guaratee but unless you have sperm count issues, i read that it may be beneficial.
Also, doing research about BD every day, i found this sperm meets egg plan - it looks like I did this month , more or less. Thought I should post it here in case it helps somebody:
Starting on CD8 begin having sex every other night.
Begin ovulation testing around CD10.
When your OPK comes back positive, have sex that night, plus two additional nights in a row (so 3 nights in a row from the day of +OPK)
Skip one night, then have sex one last time.
If you never recieve a positive OPK, continue having sex every other night until CD35, then do a pregnancy test if your period has not begun.
Bonnie good luck with DB today. I know how hard it can be and most guys take the "let's just relax and let nature takes its course" approach...and I know it is not that easy for us!
for sure so if you test again in a day or so I'm sure the hcg will be at a higher level! 
I KNow dh will do it but I want him to be as excited about it as me(TMI). I hear you for sure. It sounds like you should get on it but at the same time don't panic because you aren't likely going to O in the next couple of days so if you miss a day
I rant on a daily basis! In my house my dh is ready and willing at any time, problem is I'm not! He's 33 next month and I'm 36 and I do try to keep him happy but I'm so darn tired at the end of the evening that it really does take alot for me to get in the zone for the bd routine! 
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