TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[Reb S]

ha ha Nise! I can relate to that one, having burnt my lunch once whilst stalking!
Jax, so sorry you're having a tough time with OH. I think Sam's idea is a really good one, so that they don't feel used and abused. Personally, the BJ works every time and as he's getting over-excited, I just jump on!! hee hee. I'm quite lucky, though, as OH just gets turned on naturally when I'm O-ing. Seriously, it's a hard game to play and it's hard for it not to affect your relationship, but keep at it xx
Miss C - what a bummer. I had to have an op which put off TTC for 3 months and IVF for 6 so I know where you're coming from. I hope they can help you x
Glowie - I hope your Dr sorts herself out and comes up with the goods! Having to google while you're there doesn't exactly fill one with confidence! I'm sure it'll work out though.
Shelley - sorry she got you, but a new cycle is a new start x
AFM, scan tomorrow urk. x

 

[Miss_C]

just a real realy quickie as I couldn't read and run (gotta get ready for work) but Jax hugs hugs hugs. We have all been there. Trick is to let hubby think it is not O time, does he know your cycle? If he does you need to have a "fake" period to throw him off the scent!!

In all honesty though you BOTH need to be on board with ttc or all the stress is on you and that is not conducive to conception. If he's not on board making the baby then you are gonna have a hell of a time when ytou are the siuze of a house and can't move and when you need a half hour nap from being awake all night cos bubba was screaming and yet he didn't hear a thing!!!!!

DP and I had a massive fall out and the whole having sex just to procreate issue came up and we realised it is both our responsibility to keep it fresh and make love for making loves sake. Course since that discussion I haven't stopped bleeding so grrrrrr to the effing witch!!

The more the sex throughout the month the better not crazy but 2-3 times a week with a peak at O time, keeps the spermies fresh etc. And surprisingly orgasm releases a chemical in your body that then makes you crave sex more so it does have a flip side. Burns calories too.

Anywhoo hugs again and I hoep there is a little of something in there that may help.

 

[Mamma Mia]

I know I dont post often but I wanted to throw some hope out here.. I got my BFP yesterday on a HPT and a + blood test today 10dp3dt 1st time IVF,ICSI..

The transfer was one day after my 41st birthday!

Baby dust to all!!

 

[ciarhwyfar]

I know I dont post often but I wanted to throw some hope out here.. I got my BFP yesterday on a HPT and a + blood test today 10dp3dt 1st time IVF,ICSI..

The transfer was one day after my 41st birthday!

Baby dust to all!!

Congrats! Don't forget that you can now also join us at the over 35 pregnancy forum. I hope to see every one of you there soon!!

 

[Glowstar]

Reb - good luck with the scan today, hope you get on ok....let us know

Mamma Mia - HUGE congrats on your BFP!!! H&H 9 months

AFM - well nothing really, not really feeling it this cycle at all. I've had Diarrhea since 3dpo (Monday) which has made me feel crappy and icky. Had to bite the bullet last night and swallow some imodium as can't really seem to eat anything at all without needing the loo! so bring on the constipation now

 

[samiam]

Jet-lagged as all hell. Woke up at 3:45 feeling heartburn-esque and hot and couldn't get back to sleep, so I temped. Temp is down a lot, but who knows if that's a real temp (after all, my body thinks it's 11:41 pm right now and not 8:41 the next morning). Super exhausted now and think I am going back to bed. Saved some fmu (hidden from OH), so I can test later if I still think today's the day to do so. Going to change fff to include those two earlier low temps and see when she thinks I should test (since clearly, I've been testing too early).

Oh, and, for what it's worth, vag temps are up today, which only adds to the confusion.

 

[pip7890]

Congratulations Mamma Mia!

Pip x

 

[samiam]

Okay girls. I need some ideas. How can I possibly be this long into the LP with elevated temps and repeated BFNs and yet no AF? I "un"discarded the two temps on FFF and that changed my O date to cd 17, so now fff is calling for AF tomorrow. But a 17 day lp seems long to me. I've been googling, which in my jet-lagged state is never smart, and am now panicking a bit. What I've found is that this could actually be an anovulatory cycle or I could have a luteal cyst. Trying not to freak out about it all.

Your thoughts?

 

[Reb S]

Okay Sam, stop with the googling. It's always a bad idea, whether you're jet-lagged or not. With flying your temps are going to be unreliable so just give it another couple of days to let things settle down and then see where you are. It's very cruel, as your chart looks so lovely, so lots of hugs x
mammamia - FANTASTIC!!! I'm so pleased for you and it gives us all hope x
Glowie - sorry to hear about your troubles! Hope the immodium doesn't bring things to a total standstill...! My dog has similar troubles today, but that's because he stole the butter...!

AFM, scan today - it all looks good. Little fibroid, but in a good place (is there such a good thing as a good place for a fibroid?!) good follicular count and good candidate for short protocol/mild IVF if we decide to go. The consultant wasn't that impressed with my previous IVF, although I know that clinic has had good results before. He also hazarded a guess that because we are both in such good shape, and have been trying for so long, it's possible that my tubes are blocked. It would explain a lot. It also makes me feel better to imagine there's a physical reason for our infertility. There's not point in checking it, as he says it would all take too long for surgery, recovery and then TTC and recommends going on to IVF again. OH has had to go away for a few days so we're going to chat when he gets home. SCARY! Not sure if I want to go through it again... x
SORRY FOR ME POST! x

 

[samiam]

Okay Sam, stop with the googling. It's always a bad idea, whether you're jet-lagged or not. With flying your temps are going to be unreliable so just give it another couple of days to let things settle down and then see where you are. It's very cruel, as your chart looks so lovely, so lots of hugs x

AFM, scan today - it all looks good. Little fibroid, but in a good place (is there such a good thing as a good place for a fibroid?!) good follicular count and good candidate for short protocol/mild IVF if we decide to go. The consultant wasn't that impressed with my previous IVF, although I know that clinic has had good results before. He also hazarded a guess that because we are both in such good shape, and have been trying for so long, it's possible that my tubes are blocked. It would explain a lot. It also makes me feel better to imagine there's a physical reason for our infertility. There's not point in checking it, as he says it would all take too long for surgery, recovery and then TTC and recommends going on to IVF again. OH has had to go away for a few days so we're going to chat when he gets home. SCARY! Not sure if I want to go through it again... x
SORRY FOR ME POST! x

Thanks Reb! You're right. You are right.

Inre blocked tubes, have they mentioned getting an HSG test to determine that? It's not surgery. It takes 15 minutes and can remove small blocks from tubes. You do it on cd5-11 and there are reports of women getting pregnant by the hundreds in the months that follow. Of course I am no expert, but that's what's next on our schedule if this month doesn't pan out the way we hope it will.

 

[Reb S]

Thanks Sam, no, he didn't mention that and we weren't hugely impressed with the clinic so it's interesting what you say. Of course he would push IVF as it brings in the most money! Now you've obviously got jet lag, but what the hell am I doing up at twenty past midnight?! bedtime x

 

[samiam]

Thanks Sam, no, he didn't mention that and we weren't hugely impressed with the clinic so it's interesting what you say. Of course he would push IVF as it brings in the most money! Now you've obviously got jet lag, but what the hell am I doing up at twenty past midnight?! bedtime x

You know what? I'm super annoyed with these docs pushing IVF in order to bring in the most money! I mean, jesus. My stupid doc said that he'd do IVF "right away" before even taking ANY of my bloods. Granted, I am jet-lagged and grumpy, but it just pisses me off how unfair it is to try and prey on women when they are feeling desperate to have a baby?

I'd look into the HSG. They put a catheter in and shoot a small amount of dye in there and then X-ray the tubes. The procedure has been known to clear old tissue and mucous and small blocks and, even though it produces some cramping, can make you very fertile for a few month window after being done.

My jet-lag is really weird this time. Fall asleep like the dead, but then wake up five hours later starving and unable to go back to sleep. Not so fun, really. Here's hoping it passes SOON.

 

[Glowstar]

Reb - that all sounds SUPER positive to me agree with Sam.....I've read good things about the HSG so maybe you could push to get that done through your GP sooner rather than later?? Less invasive and won't stop any process of any kind continuing...keeping things moving along.
I think this is a really positive step forward which ever route you choose

 

[inkdchick]

well two days late and so sick of waiting but got to wait til cd31 as i have m/c'd on that date before i just want to be sure before i test x

 

[Reb S]

Ooh, Inkd, keeping my fingers crossed for you x
Sam and Glowie, thanks for your posts - it's interesting that I was never offered that on NHS before I hit the big 40. If it could have been something that simple, I wonder why they don't offer it?! Anyway, we've got another appointment next week so we'll see. Hope you guys are all fine and Sam - hope the jet lag is okay. I always get jet lag tummy, which is really annoying! I'm off to stalk your chart - any signs of AF? Or a new test...?! x

 

[Glowstar]

I'm wondering why too Reb!! A girl who I work with (don't like!!) has 2 children by 2 different Dads and is now embarking on TTC with a new partner of 9 months. He is a complete waster...and so is she and she is going for a HSG next week!!!! WTF!!!
I do think sometimes we have to stand up for our rights, us British seem to be a bit reserved at times and 'think' things but never actually say them until after the event. I have definitely learned as I've got older to tell it like it is.
OH didn't get a call back from the GP so I told him to phone today. He was told everything he needed would be left at reception and he would have to collect after work. He turned up....nothing left for him!!! and the DR had gone home!!
He then had to get an on the spot appointment with another GP who has now given him ALL the correct paperwork and information. He has actually got to provide 3 samples...each 2 weeks apart, so I've just spent ages trying to calculate my cycles and given him a list of dates that won't interfere with TTC!!
I am now on my 5th day of Diarrhea and feeling crap!!

Sam - Your temps still look awesome FX'd!

 

[Reb S]

Yours looking good too, Glowie. I love the military style operation for the SA!!! I think we oldies should write a book for those beginning the TTC journey - particularly those with little time to waste, so that they know what to do, what not to do, what to ask for politely, what to demand and who to tell to F... off! (Excuse me, little rant for all the wasted time!) What d'you think? I'll contribute the IVF assisted conception chapter, (including the special 'progesterone pessary advice and how not to fart' section) Glowie can do the OH handling advice; Sam the intricacies of TTC whilst hopping between continents...and how to handle the longest 2WW in history! - when are you testing next? Fingers crossed x
PS where's Graceface, Spoomie and co? And Miss C, how you doing? x

 

[LLbean]

Glowstar...looks like your predictions/readings all coincide and the date is there!!! FXd for you!

 

[samiam]

Reb: Yeah. WTF? Why haven't they offered you an HSG? Those bitches. But really. I LOVE your book idea. I think we'd be rich women. And just think how many women we could HELP through this horrid maze of a process! Jet lag is still a pain. But the temps are still super high (climbing, even) and no AF and a BFN yesterday. I will probably test again on Sunday or maybe Monday. Tomorrow is the due date ceremony, so I pray that I don't get AF tomorrow (no matter what).

Glowie: Your temps DO look awesome. I am so glad you took charge of your OH's thing. I mean, I know I said it before, but WTF? Why should we have to manage the doctors? I know that you said it was a British thing to be more reserved, but I'm American and I sat there on Tuesday not understanding a damned thing that fs was telling me and somehow my mouth just didn't work because he was so condescending. I am a fricking professor and I couldn't find the words to tell him what I needed. I think that part of it is the desperation and the faith that if we are quiet, maybe they will come up with an answer we hadn't considered. And yet, you know the people who have the best answers so far? YOU. YOU ladies rock. Because of all of you, I am still here with a semi-decent PMA.

AFM: Thank you ladies. I am really grateful for your advice and your kindness and your support. You're here no matter what and that's worth a billion fs docs! I am a bit weepy here on the eve of the due date and having a hard time keeping the faith with the lack of news on my current cycle. But I am so lucky to have found you all and if I were in charge of this sometimes-shitty world, I'd wave my frickin wand and we'd all be up the duff with our forever babies right NOW.

Oh, and. . . Yeah, cuz I'm sick of this eternal TWW and cuz the folks at BnB just keep ignoring my pleas for a huevo emoticon, I started this thread and they are still ignoring me. Maybe you girls could spread the word and chime in? https://www.babyandbump.com/forum-help-testing-area/604002-emoticon-suggestion.html

 

[Reb S]

Sam - I woke up early and read your post. Thinking of you all day today as you live through your due date. Mark it with something special and try not to be unhappy and make it a day that you and OH have a special time together. Lots and lots of hugs x