TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[pip7890]

I'm no expert on hcg levels but that sounds good. Fingers crossed that this is "one of those things".

I agree with Reb's sentiment. Take this time to bond with the baby - you won't regret it however things turn out.

Sending you big hugs.

Pip x

 

[LLbean]

Glowie I honestly think all will be ok, as I mentioned before I have a BNB friend that went through exactly the same and she is still pregnant...18 weeks now. I send you many many hugs. HANG IN THERE!

 

[ciarhwyfar]

Thanks Reb I suppose you start to go through a process of disassociation.

Well she just phoned me back (lovely lady) and said my HCG is 15822 which she thinks is excellent. She has booked me in for a scan on Monday morning at 8.30am. I forgot to ask if supposed to go for 2nd blood draw but should probably just go anyway.
Just waiting now to see what happens next

Those numbers sound good to me. I agree with Reb though, put the pee sticks away!!

Let's face it though, there are no guarantees in life so you need to just relax and enjoy every moment you have as they come. I'm betting you have a fighter there and we will all get to meet them. Hang in there, honey, and keep positive thoughts!

 

[samiam]

Glowie: It sounds so positive!! I agree with everyone about spending this "waiting" time enjoying being pregnant and connecting with your wee baby. Just think of the rest of the week as a mini break and do some lovely things for yourself and the baby. Go to the movies. Sleep in. Take some walks. Have lunch with a friend. Love yourself and your baby.

 

[Nise]

Glowie, those levels sound excellent to me and I'm so glad you didn't have to wait until Thurs. I have everything even my legs crossed for you. I agree with the others, try to focus on your bfp and enjoy it - I know it's all a bit scary but the good vibes are far more beneficial than the stressy bad ones. We're all routing for you both.

Sorry I've not been around much over the past week or so - have a punishing schedule at the mo. Only got one leg of the shagathon in this cycle as I was away for most of the run up. Pos opk yesterday and dtd last night. So that's it for this cycle - I had prepared myself for a non successful O so counting my blessing that I was not away during it. Hope everyone else is doing well.

 

[Reb S]

Morning all,
Glowie, how're things? Everyone on this thread is waiting with baited breath, crossed fingers, legs toes and anything else, I hope you and bean are doing well x
Spoomie - no update on your chart, that sly lil ole OH! What's news?
Sam, LLbean, 2 wwaiters - how's it going with you? Hope all are well x
Miss C - how's the clomid going?
AFM day 3 tests today, consult next week...

 

[LLbean]

all is well ...thanks for asking...my temp did a dip today, but that is normal...other than that nothing to report

How are you?

 

[Glowstar]

Good luck with the CD3 tests Reb

FX'd to everyone in the TWW

 

[Spoomie]

Hi ladies

Apologies for my absence, been away at my parents' for a couple of days. I've been worrying about Glowie the whole time and glad to hear that things are on an even keel at the mo. All good advice so try to do as you've been told!

AFM.....been doing my own temps while away. So happy yesterday when it went back up to 37.01 but I knew deep down that's because the bedroom there is so hot..back down to 36.7 this am. I'm done for this month, she'l be here today or tomorrow. This is all so exhausting, I want my life back and I just want to be happy.

 

[samiam]

Reb: Good luck with the cd3 tests! I am supposed to have those too, but every month something (travel) comes up and I miss them. So I'll either be utd this month, or finally have them done. Keep us posted!

As for me, I'm just temping and waiting. We had our timing right this month (that is unless fff changes her bloody mind AGAIN). So I feel kind of peaceful about it all (so far). Let's see how I feel about it next week when we're getting closer. But so far, so good. Some strange physical things that I am trying to ignore because I'm not going to symptom spot, but I'm sure that resolve will also fall away if the symptoms increase in number or intensity. So it's really just waiting and waiting and waiting.

Spoomie: Aw. . . . I hate seeing your chart do that. I was so ready to hear you say that it was a BFP this month. I'm so sorry, sweetie.

 

[Spoomie]

Reb: Good luck with the cd3 tests! I am supposed to have those too, but every month something (travel) comes up and I miss them. So I'll either be utd this month, or finally have them done. Keep us posted!

As for me, I'm just temping and waiting. We had our timing right this month (that is unless fff changes her bloody mind AGAIN). So I feel kind of peaceful about it all (so far). Let's see how I feel about it next week when we're getting closer. But so far, so good. Some strange physical things that I am trying to ignore because I'm not going to symptom spot, but I'm sure that resolve will also fall away if the symptoms increase in number or intensity. So it's really just waiting and waiting and waiting.

Spoomie: Aw. . . . I hate seeing your chart do that. I was so ready to hear you say that it was a BFP this month. I'm so sorry, sweetie.

Hi Samaim

I really hope you manage it with the symptom spotting. I tell myself I'm doing well because most of the time I refuse to put it into my chart, believing it's mostly psychosomatic for me. It's still going round and round in my head though. It definitely helped during the 2WW by having DH to take my temps. Sadly, the crash and burn is still massive on the day of reckoning, and so debilitating for me. On days like today I'm certain it just will never happen again. We have Dr's appointment on Friday to ask for SA and check out options for further investigation. Our timing has been good and ovulation clear for almost all of the 6 months since mc and we just want to check that it is simply that I'm too old for this and that there are no other factors that we haven't considered. Poor long suffering OH.

Maybe it's time to get my serious running head on again and start some proper training. Aside from my beautiful DS who is my salvation, that seems like the only way I'm going to get my buzz. Sorry to be so miserable - again

 

[Reb S]

Evening all,
Sam - sounds like you're in a really good place, keeping my fingers crossed for you, Nise and LLbean.
Spoomster - I'm so sorry the old hag's on her way and you keep your heart focused on your gorgeous DS and OH - they will get you through.
I had my bloods done today, will find out what's what on Monday. I'll find out what the ravages of time, IVF and MMC have done to my body! Actually I'm looking forward to it, as we will decide what to do - whether to IVF again, keep trying, or finally close the door on this. Big decisions up-coming. Is there an emoticon for screaming-heebie-jeebies?!
Anyway, GLOWIE - how are you doing? I've been thinking of you so much, as have we all and I hope you're coping well, lots of hugs x

 

[Spoomie]

Reb, you sound in a really positive place, well done you, and only cd3, please send some of that my way! You are amazing. I know I have so so much to be thankful for and really dislike myself for being so self pitying, I promise that I never used to be like this which makes me dislike myself even more! OH has said something that I am trying so hard to believe: rather than thinking of how unlucky I am to have had 3 mc and only 1 live birth, I should perhaps focus on the fact that I am lucky to have managed it once because my body clearly miscarries far easier than it grows a baby for 9 months! I hope that doesn't make him sound callous, he didn't say it in a critical way re: the failings of my body (!) rather in a way to help me appreciate the fact that I got it right once. Anyway, bereavement counselling tomorrow may help...poor counsellor that she gets me with all my complexities AND on cd1!!!

 

[samiam]

Spoomie: Doc's appointment will hopefully give you some answers. Maybe it's just a question of a small hormonal tweak or some such thing. Are you certain that tomorrow will be CD1? Has the hag arrived? I kind of like what your OH said. It is better to count one's blessings as opposed to one's lacks. Not that it's easy, mind. But maybe getting yourself into that mindset will help you feel better, stronger, happier? And if running gives you a buzz, then you should be running. Maybe not training to win London, but enough that you feel strong and happy. I think it will happen for you again, Spoomie. It may just take longer than you'd like it to.

Reb: Yep. I feel pretty darn good this cycle. OH and I had such an amazing weekend. If I do fall pregnant this cycle, I'm going to put it down to all of the laughter, because we just laughed and laughed the whole time. It was so nice to reconnect that way. I cannot wait to hear what the docs say on Monday. I hope it's good news! Maybe it will be surprisingly good!

 

[Spoomie]

Spoomie: Doc's appointment will hopefully give you some answers. Maybe it's just a question of a small hormonal tweak or some such thing. Are you certain that tomorrow will be CD1? Has the hag arrived? I kind of like what your OH said. It is better to count one's blessings as opposed to one's lacks. Not that it's easy, mind. But maybe getting yourself into that mindset will help you feel better, stronger, happier? And if running gives you a buzz, then you should be running. Maybe not training to win London, but enough that you feel strong and happy. I think it will happen for you again, Spoomie. It may just take longer than you'd like it to.

Reb: Yep. I feel pretty darn good this cycle. OH and I had such an amazing weekend. If I do fall pregnant this cycle, I'm going to put it down to all of the laughter, because we just laughed and laughed the whole time. It was so nice to reconnect that way. I cannot wait to hear what the docs say on Monday. I hope it's good news! Maybe it will be surprisingly good!

Thanks Sam, you are a pal. She's not here yet, must take comfort from the fact that, if she doesn't show today, this will be my longest luteal phase for a few months! However, I need a firm talking to as I've been scouring FFF's gallery (can't bloody escape her) for implantation dips as late as 12dpo. I need help!!! Although I did find a beauty on page 3472 to overlay with a massive dip at 13dpo. The fat lady is not here yet

Laughter, I miss laughter (and I'm dam sure my poor husband does too!) Well done to you and OH and I reeeeaaaalllllly hope that was your magic ingredient this month xxx

 

[Glowstar]

Spoomie It is hard to not be so consumed by it all...I know I have literally done my OH's head in and his head must be about to explode now after this week

It's like being on a merry-go-round that you can't get off. I actually wonder what I did with my time or what I actually thought about before TTC and it doesn't end with getting a BFP....it gets worse! Take some comfort in knowing you are not alone in this I honestly truly feel it will happen for you. I was honestly much more blase about my chart.....and it worked.....reverse psychology and all that

I may find myself back on the merry-go-round after this week...but I won't give up and you can't either.

Reb I hope you get some answers on Monday...go and kick some butt!!

 

[Reb S]

Reb, you sound in a really positive place, well done you, and only cd3, please send some of that my way! You are amazing. I know I have so so much to be thankful for and really dislike myself for being so self pitying, I promise that I never used to be like this which makes me dislike myself even more! OH has said something that I am trying so hard to believe: rather than thinking of how unlucky I am to have had 3 mc and only 1 live birth, I should perhaps focus on the fact that I am lucky to have managed it once because my body clearly miscarries far easier than it grows a baby for 9 months! I hope that doesn't make him sound callous, he didn't say it in a critical way re: the failings of my body (!) rather in a way to help me appreciate the fact that I got it right once. Anyway, bereavement counselling tomorrow may help...poor counsellor that she gets me with all my complexities AND on cd1!!!

Uh, Spoomie - give yourself a break! Stop hating yourself for your feelings! You're allowed to feel crappy after 3 MC's - you're not allowed to call yourself 'selfpitying' or to dislike yourself!!! Focus on the fact that actually you are pretty amazing yourself! But Sam's right - your OH sounds great and he's right too. Counting blessings; enjoying what we have right now - that's the positive way I think we can TTC, otherwise the process becomes a curse and peculiarly removed from what it should be, which is loving each other. OhmiGawd I sound like some kind of evangelist!! Sam put me in the mood by reminding me why we actually make love to our OH's!
I'm just waxing philosophical because me and OH are nearing the end of our journey one way or another and that's a good feeling, albeit maybe a sad one.
Anyway, I'll stop blathering!
Sam - so glad you had such a great time with your OH x
Glowie - you sound great, hang in there and keep the faith x
Yikes! Nearly forgot Miss C - how's the clomid-brain? x

 

[Glowstar]

It's not looking good. Beta has only gone from 15822 to 19583 in 48 hrs. That's a doubling time of 156 hrs and only about 25%. Just started spotting pink...so don't think this pregnancy is going to continue. Still got to go for a scan on Monday...how depressing

 

[Reb S]

Oh no, Glowie, I'm so sorry.

 

[LLbean]

Glowie sending you MANY hugs and remember, there is still hope! Again, my friend was like that too and she is now 18 weeks!

Hang in there, don't give up hope on the little bean just yet