TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[pdmcd17]

I think I'm done ttc
I can't do this anymore the disappointment of bfn or af arriving
Feeling like a failure every month
Im gonna just stop ttc for a while and see if I want to continue - I was only gonna ttc till march

I even suggested to my oh to make an appointment to get snipped today - I don't think I can take the emotional toll anymore

You ladies have been supportive and amazing I wish you all success with ttc

 

[Butterfly67]

I think I'm done ttc
I can't do this anymore the disappointment of bfn or af arriving
Feeling like a failure every month
Im gonna just stop ttc for a while and see if I want to continue - I was only gonna ttc till march

I even suggested to my oh to make an appointment to get snipped today - I don't think I can take the emotional toll anymore

You ladies have been supportive and amazing I wish you all success with ttc

 

[Reb S]

I think I'm done ttc
I can't do this anymore the disappointment of bfn or af arriving
Feeling like a failure every month
Im gonna just stop ttc for a while and see if I want to continue - I was only gonna ttc till march

I even suggested to my oh to make an appointment to get snipped today - I don't think I can take the emotional toll anymore

You ladies have been supportive and amazing I wish you all success with ttc

Pdmc - I'm so sorry - please don't rush off and close all the doors just because you're disappointed. Give it a bit of time and have a good think and chat with your OH. I guess only you know when it really is time to give up, but don't do anything you might regret later. Lots of hugs, have a glass of wine and be good to yourself xxx

Sam - FFFFFF still says wait two more days to test, so WAIT! FX for you x

Miss C - please don't worry, it won't help anything. You had a really good line and a digi, so all the signs are good xx

 

[Spoomie]

Evening ladies

Pd, I'm so sorry. Hang in there and never, ever decide that the journey is over on cd1, it's the least rational day of the month. We can all empathise with you on the draining feeling of yet another failed month and know how soul destroying it is. Take a few days to see how you feel once the clouds start to lift and reassess then. Sending you big hugs

Twinny, you are NOT to worry about this! Like Glowie, I had a similar experience on my first pregnancy some years ago. I had 3 +hpts and 2 negatives with the GP, who eventually, at 9 weeks sent me for a scan to confirm because his tests kept coming back negative. Although I later went on to mc, I saw a bouncing baby tucked up there for sure, so try to ignore the negative results for now and focus on how immense your relief will be when Dr's test catches up with yours

Sam, I am hoping and praying for all to be well with you, your chart looks so good. HOWEVER.......as Reb and I both learnt (again!) to our cost last month, the crash is harder to deal with when you've had a great looking chart preceding af, so please, please guard your fragile heart. Crossing (almost, cd11!!!) everything for you

Reb, thank you xxx

 

[Garnet]

I think I'm done ttc
I can't do this anymore the disappointment of bfn or af arriving
Feeling like a failure every month
Im gonna just stop ttc for a while and see if I want to continue - I was only gonna ttc till march

I even suggested to my oh to make an appointment to get snipped today - I don't think I can take the emotional toll anymore

You ladies have been supportive and amazing I wish you all success with ttc

 

[pip7890]

pdmcd17

Take a little time to think things through. We're here if you need to talk, or message me on FB.

Pip x

 

[LLbean]

I think I'm done ttc
I can't do this anymore the disappointment of bfn or af arriving
Feeling like a failure every month
Im gonna just stop ttc for a while and see if I want to continue - I was only gonna ttc till march

I even suggested to my oh to make an appointment to get snipped today - I don't think I can take the emotional toll anymore

You ladies have been supportive and amazing I wish you all success with ttc

 

[Spoomie]

Reb, looks like you are in to the hell that is the 2ww. Still high on cbfm, but hope to join you in a day or so xx

Sam, hope you're doing ok and would just love to see it go back up again tomorrow xx

AFM, must say that I feel soooo much better since my acupuncture. Maybe it's real or maybe it's psychosomatic or maybe it's just because I am in that hopeful phase of the month when ovulation is imminent, but I feel more content with my lot than I have for a while (crash and burn will be huge in 2 weeks time if it's only the latter!!!)

 

[Miss_C]

https://www.fertilityfriend.com/journal/revyxhTvK.png

Sam not sure if this works but I overlaid our charts - very very similar!! When are you testing?

well I have to wait until THURSDAY for the qualitive (sp?) blood test doc had not ordered the quantative like I told him he needed to do. Nor was there a rush put on it etc. Called the clinic that was our next step and the nurse was wonderful and wondered if she should overide and send a test in on behalf of my FS. I felt bad and said please don't put yourself in a position. Dr Kasan is back from hols next week I am sure a week won't make a huge amount of difference will it. She really wanted the quantative test done a) to check the doubling and b) it may give us an indicator if thee is more than one in there. I thought I only had 2 follicles that would defintely go and maybe a 3rd and she says to me no there were 3 that could definitely go and a 4th that may!!!!

Does anyone know what the earliest anything can be seen on an ultrasound, even if it's just to say how many are in there!

Oh gosh what a fricken roller coaster. Still not excited really which effin well sucks but after a loss I wonder at what point you feel you can breathe out. I want to be overjoyed and instead I am just terrified. This will definitely be my last pregnancy whatever the outcome so I want to enjoy every moment of it. Including hubby laughing at me at 1:20am when I was throwing up! Never had that with Jake or Ziggy's first attempt!

Sorry to whinge this is last thing ttcers want to hear, I will hold back in future, I know you love me and I love you all back, just wanted to let you know where we are at and will update next week when we know more.

I'm not going anywhere though, I am still gonna stalk and post you all!!

Spoomie my darling twinny, I really think the acupuncture made a huge diff for me. My period was so very normal and healthy and I was relaxed and calm and I am sure that helped. The maca also made me feel more energised.

Reb - welcome to hell!!! May it go fast for you

PD hugs hugs hugs sweetheart. We are all here if you want to talk anything/ everything through

 

[LLbean]

https://www.fertilityfriend.com/journal/revyxhTvK.png

Sam not sure if this works but I overlaid our charts - very very similar!! When are you testing?

well I have to wait until THURSDAY for the qualitive (sp?) blood test doc had not ordered the quantative like I told him he needed to do. Nor was there a rush put on it etc. Called the clinic that was our next step and the nurse was wonderful and wondered if she should overide and send a test in on behalf of my FS. I felt bad and said please don't put yourself in a position. Dr Kasan is back from hols next week I am sure a week won't make a huge amount of difference will it. She really wanted the quantative test done a) to check the doubling and b) it may give us an indicator if thee is more than one in there. I thought I only had 2 follicles that would defintely go and maybe a 3rd and she says to me no there were 3 that could definitely go and a 4th that may!!!!

Does anyone know what the earliest anything can be seen on an ultrasound, even if it's just to say how many are in there!

Oh gosh what a fricken roller coaster. Still not excited really which effin well sucks but after a loss I wonder at what point you feel you can breathe out. I want to be overjoyed and instead I am just terrified. This will definitely be my last pregnancy whatever the outcome so I want to enjoy every moment of it. Including hubby laughing at me at 1:20am when I was throwing up! Never had that with Jake or Ziggy's first attempt!

Sorry to whinge this is last thing ttcers want to hear, I will hold back in future, I know you love me and I love you all back, just wanted to let you know where we are at and will update next week when we know more.

I'm not going anywhere though, I am still gonna stalk and post you all!!

Spoomie my darling twinny, I really think the acupuncture made a huge diff for me. My period was so very normal and healthy and I was relaxed and calm and I am sure that helped. The maca also made me feel more energised.

Reb - welcome to hell!!! May it go fast for you

PD hugs hugs hugs sweetheart. We are all here if you want to talk anything/ everything through

I was told 6 weeks is the earliest

 

[maryanne67]

keeping everything crossed for you miss_c and know exactly how you feel about not being excited, i am at the same week this week as i had my mc in my last pregnancy so am worrying more this week and do wonder when/if i will ever get excited, but we have to be hopefull of a good outcome for us all, i am going to book a private scan for next week as nhs is useless in the uk, sending u lots of sticky and pma x

for every1 else fx`d for a good outcome this month x

 

[truly_blessed]

congratulations MaryAnne! I couldn't get excited until about 16 weeks with this one after my mmc and even now I'm still holding off buying too much until we get past the 24 weeks. I think with each scan it gets more and more real and then when you see your bump growing and feel the kicks it's all a bit surreal. good luck.

 

[Glowstar]

Maryanne - why not invest in a doppler? It's been my godsend! I got a BT200 with LCD off Ebay for £28. I managed to pick up baby's heartbeat from exactly 9 weeks and found it everyday since.

Miss C - the very earliest you would prob be able to see anything on a scan would be at least 6 weeks. At 5 weeks I had an empty sac and at 7 weeks a baby (blob) with a hearbeat. So I wouldn't push for one too soon as you might end up more worried.
I'll be honest and say the fear/worry never really leaves. I have been an emotional wreck the last couple of months I spent a lot of time sleeping days away to make time go faster

Sending you loads of sticky vibes

I'm a plum today

 

[Spoomie]

Twinny, I think it has to be 5+ weeks. Like Glowie said, it only shows an empty sac at best before then and that has the opposite effect, causing anxiety instead of easing your worries. Re: relaxation, I believe that suffering a loss robs you of so much joy in pregnancy because the innocence is gone, and fear looms large. However, it is a big milestone to pass the date of your latest mc (if that makes sense?) Previously my latest loss had been 10 weeks, so every subsequent pregnancy I relaxed a little after that. Now, having suffered a 12 week loss I would be very nervous until that date had passed and then relax a little thereafter. Having said that, we all know to our cost how difficult it is even to get pregnant now, so, having achieved that, please try to enjoy and savour the fact that Ziggy is with you NOW. Guard your heart by all means (who am I kidding, it's way too late for that!) but believe that he will be strong enough to complete his journey this time

 

[beetle]

Huge congrats Miss C and Maryanne! Wishing you both a very sticky pregnancy. I completely understand how you feel about not being able to completely celebrate due to previous MC and even though I've passed where I was with my last miscarriage its 2nd nature to worry. Either because you haven't got symptoms or because you have symptoms and you worry whether they are normal! I think the suggestion of a doppler is a fantastic idea at least its a way of reassurance until the 12 week scan! Good luck to you both! x

 

[samiam]

Another temp drop and another BFN. That's me out for this cycle, then.

 

[Spoomie]

Another temp drop and another BFN. That's me out for this cycle, then.

Bless you Sam I hate FFFFF and the way she leads you on, when this journey is over, SHE is one who I certainly won't miss. Onwards and upwards; you've done it before and you will do it again xxx

 

[Miss_C]

Sam hugs honey - I posted to you on FB.

My bloods are in - 39 - so I am pregnant but have no idea if that is a good number or not - stupid doc not ordering the quantative grrrrrrr

 

[Butterfly67]

Another temp drop and another BFN. That's me out for this cycle, then.

I'll join you Sam ... on to planning for next cycle

 

[amommy]

Miss C unfortunately you can't tell much by one number except that you are pregnant.. that is def pg hon! I'm sorry the docs are stupid!