TTC 40 plus!! Lets share the ups and downs!

[Spoomie]

Hi Ink, nice to see you back here! Hope you're doing okay x
Spoomie, where aaaaaaaaaaaaaaare you?! My cycle buddy, how're you doing?
Any news from our Miss C?

Hey Reb

Still here! Ditto, it's nice to see Inkd back, your departing post made me so sad so I'm glad you have decided to keep pressing on for the ultimate prize for a while longer. Crossing it all for you.

Reb, I'm currently 9 or 10 dpo depending on which setting I am on. I have been temping - don't be cross! - but not inputting on my FFFFF chart so that she can't lead me on, hateful creature that she is! Feeling better for it, clever you. Acupuncture is really helping me too I think. I feel happier and more at peace with this whole process than I have since last mc. Please God it's not just because I am in that 'hopeful phase' of my cycle but that it is for real. Should be able to let you know more on that midweek...... Hope all's good for you. You are so so good, not one temp since post ovulation rise, you are so strong! Anything to report? Are you home yet?

Re: my Twinny. I messaged her a few nights back when I saw that she was online and she replied to say that she is spending time in the mc support forum which I know we all hope will help her. I know that Sam has pmd her too. I think of her lots and hope that life is not so dark for her

Also, where is Sam???

to you all x

 

[samiam]

I'm here. In the midst of the virtual fest and waiting to see when fff thinks my O day is/was. Missed temping this morning and something went weird with CBFM, but I'm not feeling all that concerned at the moment. I feel calm too, but almost like I've given up. My work schedule is brutal at the moment, so I'm just focusing on making it through the semester and on trying to relax this weekend.

I'm thinking good thoughts for you and Reb, Spoomie!!!

 

[Spoomie]

Sam, I know what you mean. I can't decided if my sense of wellbeing is a calm that this will happen in good time (but not that long to wait, lets face it!) and that I should just let it be and get on with my life, or if it is a gradual acceptance of the fact that my last chance disappeared last November. Oh well, at least I feel happier so that can only be a good thing because there have been some unbearably dark days and this has to be progress, right? Thinking good thoughts for you too xxx

 

[Reb S]

Hey, we're all in the same head place, I think. I too, feel very calm and fine, although I'm pretty certain AF is on her way, as I was grumpy as hell yesterday! Maybe it's all the losses here recently and the realisation that even if we do get that elusive BFP, the odds are against us 2 to 1 nowadays....
Anyway, home today finally, to my lovely OH and finding out how he did at his interview on Wednesday next week... FX for him and a new job xxx
Hope all are well - any news from Beetle? Thinking of her this coming week xxx

 

[inkdchick]

rebs i think that we will all be sending our well wishes for your OH interview becoming his new job fingers crossed here, i've been looking for a job for two years and hve now come to think that my age is against me but hey im not giving up have just had an offer from a distributor of tattoo designs all around the world for me to submit some of my designs to them and hopefully they will want them and more and pay me for them , i have loads !! so good luck to us both x

 

[lullabybarb]

Hi, ladies. Just back to BnB and am over on the TTC 35+ thread but wanted to find you ladies over here.

Didn't get a chance to read that far back yet but a big congrats to you lovely ladies that are heaped in baby dust! So beautiful to see.

butterfly & keekee - nice to see you ladies here. I thought maybe I was the only one over in our other thread in the 40+ category Nice to know I am not alone on this unique TTC road.

Hello yes its lovely seeing more ladies 40 plus we can all give each other hope! im barb and im 41 yrs young (feel more like 21 inside) Wishing us all lots of

 

[Reb S]

Thanks Ink, age is definitely a factor in jobs I think, but hoping his experience will win this one for him. Hope they like your tattoos - I love your art when it's your avatar!
Lullabarb - wish I felt 21 inside! Today is CD1 so I'm feeling about 50.
Oh well, no surprise, this is nearly 4 years of trying, so I'm kind of used to it...!

 

[Butterfly67]

for cd1 Reb, it is always the toughest day i find

 

[beetle]

Hi guys, thanks so much for your lovely wishes. Boy it sucks. I can't quite yet bring myself to remove my pregnancy tag until I see the next scan for sure. There is always hope although my OH and I have resigned ourselves to the worst. And Reb S thanks so much for your advice about opting for the D&C - I have had so many people give me the same advice. I guess those of us that have been here all hope that everyone is wrong and the scan must have missed something but if there is nothing there on Thursday even if the pregnancy sac has grown we will opt for a D&C which will happen on Friday.
Thanks for the suggestion that it might have been due to low progesterone levels - I don't think its the case because I have a very large corpus luteal cyst measuring 4.5 cms which is chucking out progesterone apparently. The docs think its more likely a blighted ovum as the sac was measuring 5.5 weeks. (at the 8 week scan) The bloods I had done at 7 weeks said that progesterone was 87.5, and the first hcg was 17559 and the one 2 days later was 18492. (so things obviously slowing down on that front). Anyway must get back to finalising the order of service for mums thanksgiving service on Wednesday and what will be will be on Thursday/Friday. We reckon we are going to try one more time naturally (after waiting for AF which may be 4-6 weeks) and see where we are at at Christmas and if not pregnant come up with a cunning plan. Any advice or recommendations gratefully received! I'll probably be hooking up with Miss C on the Miscarriage support forum. xx

 

[inkdchick]

Honey we all wish you the very best and our thoughts will be with you.
The only advice that i can give you is that you need to give yourself time, you will need this time,(my past experience was losing my little boy at 22 weeks pregnant and i had to have him !, ) but even tho you not that far it makes no difference your body will still go through the hormone motions but be aware that with those hormones in your system you will be very fertile and if you decide to try straight away which is what i did ( my girls are now 19 and 17), the likely hood is that you will fall pregnant ! quicker than you think and i wish you all the very best and hope to see you on here again very soon xxx for you x

 

[Spoomie]

Reb......I hate that witch, hope you're feeling ok xxx

 

[Spoomie]

Beetle, been thinking of you and sorry to hear that your wait goes on. Reading what you said about hoping against hope made me think of my last mc and wanted to warn you not to underestimate the pain if and when the sad news is confirmed. We knew our baby was gone as we held the tiny little body after the mc happened but still I went in to the scan the next day praying that perhaps they would find a mystery twin who had been hiding at the first scan. Crazy, I know but the pain of disappointment was immense.

I'll be thinking of you on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, what a difficult week for you

 

[samiam]

Oh Beetle: I'm so very sorry. It does sound like a very sad week for you. And we all know how that feels. You really just keep on hoping that they are wrong about it all.

Reb: Stupid hag. She ruins all of the fun, doesn't she?

Spoomie: I really wish you were temping, because I have no charts to ogle! But I get it. . . Here's hoping. 13dpo already!!

AFM: I think I'm headed for an anov cycle. Boobs killing me, but CBFM is still showing low and fff temps are all over the place. Plus I feel exhausted and REALLY cranky. Not at all how I should feel if I were just about to O (or even right after). More like AF is about to get here. So. There's that. Fucked up hormones again, obvo. But I think we're out again for this cycle. Nothing like knowing that you're out every damned month because you missed the timing of the fucking huevo. I think it's time to be realistic and just say that we're NTNP, because OH can't be bothered to come back when it's O time and then, after sending one shipment of this time, he chickened out and wouldn't send any more. I'm too tired to fight with him about it and too tired to even try at this point. Anyway. I feel as emotional as I normally do on cd1, so Reb, I know what you mean, hon.

 

[Spoomie]

Sam I was checking out your chart yesterday and I too thought it looked like an annovulatory cycle, so sorry. However, my second thought was that you had one of those the cycle (or 2 cycles?) before you were pregnant a couple of months ago. I'm sorry to hear that things are strained with you and OH again but hang in there, you may find things completely turn around in a matter of weeks. Sending you huge, huge

AFM...Inputted my data just to give you something to look at! Still on the high side but been there before, not getting excited, not really rising either. Plus, don't really have any symptoms so playing the waiting game here for temp to drop off a cliff tomorrow. Yes, acceptance is a prevalent feeling these days x

 

[Reb S]

Sam - sorry if your cycle is a no-show huevo... and I know that you and OH will work it out - you always do. xxx
Spoomie - I'm just hoping that in the midst of all this acceptance and fairly negative spirit, your BFP will just sneak in and surprise us. I remember feeling that when Truly Blessed got pregnant and now she's a happy viable 25 weeks... xxx
Beetle, thinking of you xxx

 

[Spoomie]

I was thinking of Shelley this morning. Has anyone heard how she's doing?

 

[Butterfly67]

She posted a few days back on another thread and this is the most of it:

To catch you all up: I got my results yesterday, and they were all normal - no PCOS. You'd think that would be a good thing, but in reality it's not. It means that a FS is the only step left. Most likely I am premenopausal, or the problem lies with him. My OB is going to do one last thing, which is an ultrasound in two weeks to look at my ovaries and uterus. He wants to rule out anything there. After that, he can't do anything more.

The whole married/fertility specialist thing turns out to be a STATE LAW. Yeah

.

 

[Reb S]

Hello ladies,
Well I saw my new FS this arvo, who is a very glam lady...she reckons I should definitely cycle again, gives me a 33% chance, which is much higher than before, not sure where she got the figures...! She's also doing £1000 of tests to ensure there's not a chance there's anything wrong with me that caused the MC, which means it would only be the normal chromosomal reasons which can't be avoided. Down-reg would be much shorter than last year and with a nasal spray to make it easier for travelling - and we would start in about 17 days. OMG. Decision time, finally. HELP!

 

[Butterfly67]

Sounds very exciting Reb, 33% sounds like quite a good chance with your own eggs

 

[maryanne67]

hi everyone, Reb i say go for it , you may think this silly but i can feel the excitement in your words, good luck hun whatever you decide x