Hi ladies. I sent the last message on the way to a very nice restaurant, kinda rude to text while eating dinner at the restaurant so I had to cut it short. But now I am home, just had a shot of Cointreau that didn't agree with me too much, but in need or relaxation and herbal tea just won't cut it tonight. Friday was a complete disaster. If you read my last message, the idiot nurse prescribed a medicine that I just couldn't justify giving Natalie. I kept pushing this "nurse" to give her Risperdal because Natalie had a good experience with this medication in the past but they kept pushing this medicine called depakote. I have heard about this in the past in a documentary and didn't remember at the time that this medicine was the same one I was actually terrified about giving her. If Natalie Had epilepsy it would be a different story because this drug is given to epileptics, but she isn't epileptic but Risperdal treats all of the symptoms that Natalie has. why they refused to give her a medicine that helped at least a little in the past, is beyond me. I put in the prescription of Depakote but not going to pick it up. I am going to request another doctor asap. Btw, her sleeping medicine is working quite well, no more staying awake until 5 or 6 in the morning. She falls asleep in about 1.5 hours now, instead of after 4,5 or even 6 hours.
The day we had the appointment with the nurse, everything went downhill right after. we went out to eat and Natalie completely lost it. She has an obsession with balloons and we avoid buying them because if we do we end up paying for it after buying the damn things. She has a complete obsession for them and it causes a lot of chaos in the house. Believe me when I tell you, it is for the better that we don't buy them. She wanted us to buy her balloons that she saw at a store right after the psych appointment. we tried to distract her and do all we could to take her attention off of the balloons but she had a complete mental breakdown in front of everybody in that store. People were looking at us in total disbelief and I had to remove Natalie from the store. I had Sophie in her stroller and took Natalie outside of the store. She went crazy. She started hitting me, hitting Aly and I had to restrain her from running into the street into the traffic. It was so terrifying. when we got to the car Natalie started screaming at the top of her lungs and I was even scared that somebody would call the police. She made Alyssa cry, my idiot husband got pissed off at her because he still doesn't understand that Natalie is sick. Her meltdown lasted about 2 loooooooooong hours. Finally I calmed her down. Sometimes I feel that I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. Nobody seems to understand the extent of Natalie's mental illness but me. Anyways, this has been my weekend so far. Natalie is left without any medicine and I am left here picking up the pieces. Life seems to be getting harder and harder.
Who kept Simon when you went?
give im some time before u worry.
I was really hopeful for you this cycle. I really really hope that the RE has some answers for you hun.
to all of you!
. I had wished that we could conceive and a bean would stick naturally but that is not in the stars for us now.
hope everyone is having a good weekend! 
The best part is saying buh bye to the OPKs! I wonder how they will know when to do the IUI w/o knowung the LH surge though...I'm curious and excited and super hopeful for you! 
