TTC After D&C/D&E Buddies

[Aunie]

Janetplant, outburst all you want hun! You deserve it .

I'm afraid to have sex cause I read your cervix may still be open alittle increasing your risk of infection in your uterus which can cause scarring and more trouble ttc. However, I didn't wait to have sex after my mc's and I was fine and a mc and d&e is about the same right? Plus, isn't your cervix open a little when you O so the sperm can get in there?

 

[jennajul2001]

I was told to wait 2 weeks after my dnc to have sex , but truth be told I needed to feel closer to dh and we did it after 9 days and again the other night. I do rush to the bathroom after just in case, but I dont wanna miss my oppurtunity.

I was given antibiotics after my dnc also as I had a slight infection. I would really rather not see af again and get pregnant right away but I doubt I will be that lucky.

As for CD1 I have no idea, I wasnt going to keep track but I need something to keep track of in this horrible waiting period lol.

 

[JanetPlanet]

Hmm, that's interesting. I know the exact day my FRER test turned completely negative (it seemed like it took 90,374.903,274,782 years).

I usually O on CD16, so it would be interesting if I got AF exactly 16 days after the pregnancy test turned negative. I'm going to keep track.

 

[nostress]

I'm not too sure about cycle days either...

Yay for all ya'll who are back to being sexually active... Boohoo, the hubs won't come near me till I get my clean bill of health from the doc. Jerk, it's almost been a month since we've... woohooed

I was put on 10 days pelvic rest... boohoo

 

[nostress]

Welcome harley, I hope you find support on this thread.

As far as when you can start doing stuff again, I'm not sure. I was told 10 days to 2 weeks of pelvic rest. Then to wait till after my first period to TTC again, we'll be trying as soon as I get my negative, no condoms here (lol @ Janet) Let's start the chant back up:

SCREW THE CONDOMS, SCREW THE CONDOMS, SCREW THE CONDOMS!

JanetPlanet - Blowing up is sometimes the best way to let out some steam.

 

[Kanga86]

Hey ladies, I was also wondering when was best to bd again after the op, I'm only cd4 and still getting some bleeding so will probably just wait til that stops before giving it ago. My poor oh has only had woohoo 3-4 times since may! After I got my pos test I had horrible morning sickness and then I have been bleeding the rest of the time! So I don't think I will need to persuade him too much to bd!

 

[Twinkie210]

So I just read on another thread that instead of counting cd1 the day of your d&c, you're supposed to count cd1 the day your hcg levels are normal. What do you ladies think?

I am not sure. I have read that before too, but at 2.5 weeks after my D&C, my hpt's were still positive, so I am guessing if this is true, I am in for the longest cycle ever (mine are normally 32-34 days, but sometimes as long as 40!). I am still waiting for FF to confirma O, but my temp was higher this morning (actually post O high FXed!) I put in the same temp for the next couple days to see what FF would do and it game me crosshairs at like CD 18 and today is CD25, so I don't think that would be right anyway. I am guessing if I did O it was on CD21 or CD 24, but I can't really guess right now since all my temps have been crazy. But if you subtract the 18 or 19 days it took my hpt to go neg (or nearly neg), it would be really early for me to be O right now. So I think either way, this cycle is hard to predict!

 

[Aunie]

After both of my mc's, it took me 6 weeks to get af and both times I got pregnant 3 months later. If I can get pregnant withing 3 months again I'll be over joyed! However going through an arizona summer super pregnant won't be very fun! Its 8:30am here and its already 94 degrees outside blah! If I count my d&e as cd1 I should o between thurs and sat, I'm not really sure when I O cause I've never kept track before. If I count cd1 the day my hpt came back neg, I should O around next weds which is when my post-op appt is. We will see! When will you ladies be taking hpts? Or will you wait for af?

 

[bastetgrrl]

Happy Monday ladies! :wave: Looks like this thread was very busy this weekend.

Hope everyone had a good weekend. I've got my follow up appt on Wed but all I'm gonna do is pee in a cup to confirm my levels are zero which I already know since I took a hpt on Friday and my temps are back to the way they were before. YAY! Finally back to normal!!

 

[Aunie]

When using the opks, does the line get darker and darker the closer you get to O or do you just get one dark line right before you O? Also, I heard you should bd every other day instead of every day. What do you all do or is that tmi?

 

[bastetgrrl]

When using the opks, does the line get darker and darker the closer you get to O or do you just get one dark line right before you O? Also, I heard you should bd every other day instead of every day. What do you all do or is that tmi?

Keep in mind that OPKs do not confirm O they only confirm LH surge meaning you could get a positive OPK (body gets ready to O but doesn't) and then O at a later date or not at all. And yes, the darker the line the high LH surge.

 

[JanetPlanet]

The line can get darker over several days, or it can be faint one day and dark positive the next.

I have heard that if your man's sperm is compromised, to BD every other day, and if it's good quality, to BD every day. There has also been some research suggesting that every day is a good idea even if the sperm is compromised because the more swimmers that are in place waiting for the egg, the better. That being said, most doctors say that every other day is adequate.

My husband and I do it every other day as soon as I'm done with AF, then at least once a day when I'm about 3-4 days out from ovulating and then another two days or so past when I get a positive OPK. By the last couple of days I want to scream. I mean, I love having sex with my husband, but the pressure is really irritating to me (and to him).

Hey! I'm getting cramps. Of course I'd be happy with a BFP, but I'd also love to get my first AF after the D&C so I can start treatment!

Hope everyone's having a great day!

 

[Aunie]

My husband is getting anxious to bd, I told him to cherish the feeling cause he's gonna get more sex than he wants soon enough! Making babies shouldn't be this hard, it should be fun

 

[jennajul2001]

Today is not a good day for me at all. I have just wanted to lay in bed all day and do nothing but cry. I just dont want to do anything at all. Its 2 weeks today since I lost my little boy and it's not getting any easier. I really dont know if I can cope with this anymore.

I cant stop thinking about what I lost and what is missing in my life.I never got to see my lo on an ultrasound or when he was born. I have nothing to grasp onto. I feel like I have nothing to remember him by. I wish I had an ultrasound photo or something but I have absolutely nothing.

I hate feeling like this I know I have a 10 yr old dd, and I should be thankful I have her (which I am), but I cant seem to get past this at all. She is at the age where she pretty much can do everything for herself which leaves me with nothing to do. I can do housework but honestly I cant bring myself to do it, I know I need to but I cant do it. I just lay around and do nothing I feel so guilty at the end of the day when Ive gotten nothing done . I hate mornings, the pain just comes rushing back as soon as I open my eyes, I really hate mornings now.

I'm so sorry to everyone that reads this, I just needed to get it out. I feel sooo alone and lost, I really am hoping this gets better and easier.

 

[JanetPlanet]

jenna, I am so sorry for your loss and that you're having a hard time.

Don't try to tackle this alone. You're only two weeks out and not only have you lost your LO, but you may have some postpartum depression.

I don't know about Canada, but here where I live there are support groups for women experiencing a loss such as yours. I know there are some programs at some hospitals in my area.

One helpful thing in finding some sort of support group may be that you can possibly hear about how other women find a way to remember their LO, without having an ultrasound etc. Did you have an ultrasound done at all?

If that isn't an option, do you have access to counseling/therapy? It may help you to talk about your feelings with someone with whom you do not have to edit what you say. And some anti-depressants on a temporary basis can be very helpful.

I would not worry about letting the house go a little. All that can be taken care of when you feel better. And you probably will feel better. The loss will never go away, but it should recede some.

Sorry this is so long. I have not been through your specific situation, but I want you to know you are not alone.

 

[jennajul2001]

Janet, thanks for replying to me. I have thought about counseling and talking to someone but I have wanted to try to deal with it on my own. I thought I was doing ok but its still so raw, all I can think about is trying again, and since its only been 2 weeks i know I wont be doing that anytime soon.

I may have to look into talking to someone though as I dont wanna be this way forever. I wish I could just go back to being the way I was pre-pregnancy, but I can't.

I didnt have any ultrasounds, I had scheduled my first one to find out the sexe of the baby on September 13thy, but obviously its not going to happen.

I had ultrasounds done at the ER when I was in the midst of losing my baby and never got to see the screen or see my baby move. I guess I just wish I had gotten some kind of photo or something to remember him by but its so hard with nothing to look at to remember.

Sorry that was so loing, I really didnt mean to say so much!

 

[JanetPlanet]

Jenna, you can write as long a post as you'd like. I always figure that people can scroll past me if they don't want to read what I write.

If you had ultrasounds in the emergency room, there is a slight chance that they may have printed out a copy for your file. I don't want to get your hopes up, but it's worth looking into.

And be gentle with yourself. It is extremely easy to feel guilty about whatever emotions you're having right now. And to feel like they will last forever. But you have a right to feel anyway that you need to right now. You have a right to feel raw, and feel like doing nothing but crying.

But I do urge you to try to find someone or a group of someones to talk to. I don't know why it helps, but it does. There are also several hotlines. Here's one (I do not know how accurate this number is, I haven't tried it, but you could google "miscarriage" "hotline" and "canada"). National SIDS, Stillbirth & Miscarriage Hotline 1-800-221-7437.

 

[Aunie]

Jenna, I was thinking the same thing about the US, everytime my dr did one she printed a pic for my chart, I don't know about hospitals though. Its worth a phone call though! I'm opposite of you, I have 2 pics of my baby alive and one after it passed. I put everything that had to do with my pregnancy away and I can't bring myself to look at them. It just hurts to much right now. I'm really sorry you're having such a hard time love, I know nothing I say will make you feel better but just know you're not alone.

 

[nostress]

Hey bastet! Yay so happy for you being back to normal, I'm taking another hpt tomorrow morning, my fingers are crossed that it will be a BFN, my temps look normal...

 

[nostress]

Janet and Aunie - I am on the same page with BDing, it's awesome and fun and I am OH SO READY but it's going to get old fast... Ugh, really shouldn't be so much work.