TTC after loss - over 40 - any takers? Our lucky thread - 9 rainbows and 1 BFP

[crazymam]

I am on two week wait too, but not feeling very optimistic

 

[dancareoi]

creative - hope your son makes it
crazymam - fx

 

[Oasis717]

I've not been on for a while so only just seen your news dancareoi, I'm so so very pleased for you!! Massive congrats, it gives me hope xxx started charting this month and got my first positive opk today so I'm hoping to be able to see I'm ovulating now I'm charting, I should have done it before its so easy!

 

[josie1234]

Hi, I am 42 and DH 45. I have 12 yr old son from first marriage and DH has 2 children from first marriage who are 21 and 19 yrs. Unfortunately, I found out I had miscarried on our anniversary in Jun 2012 after 4 years of ttc. It was a lovely shock to find out I was expecting as didn't think it was going to happen but didn't want to go down all the medical routes, just thought, it will happen if its meant to be. I found out there was no heartbeat at my 12-week scan (Jun) but I had started bleeding a couple of days before, the baby's heartbeat had stopped at 9 weeks. I was so devastated and thought it was cruel to tease us and then take our lovely child away. I understand that maybe something was wrong and we agreed to carry on ttc. I would have been due to give birth on 4 Jan 13. We are trying not to get obsessive about it but I would be so happy to be pregnant before its too late. My period is due 21st Jan but they have been a bit all over the place but I am tracking them with periodtracker app. Today I am supposed to ovulating according to the app but I have creamy discharge, no odour. Does this mean anything? Lots of baby dust to those ttc and good luck to you all in 2013 for happiness xxx

Hi welcome to our group and so sorry for your loss.

I am 41 and DH is 43. I have DS 11, DD 8 and DD 2.

I lost my first at 8 weeks in July 09. I lost another at 13 weeks last Jan - we found out on 9th jan when i thought I was 17 weeks that baby had died approx 13-14 weeks, this was after a healthy nuchal scan at 12 weeks. My LO was born sleeping 12th jan 12.

We then TTC again in May and in August i was PG again, went for a scan at 7 weeks and all was good, went for a scan at 9 weeks at the end of sept and found baby had died the day before.

We have just started to TTC again this month and i OV on xmas day and got my BFP yesterday, so I am now hoping and praying this will work.

Are you using OPK because this is really the best way of telling when you are about to OV, used in conjuction with CM. On the run up to OV the CM becomes watery and a just before becomes just like egg white, this indicates OV is around the corner.

After OV Cm can dry up or can go creamy, so from what you are saying you may have already OV.

Are you tracking your temperature each morning as well?

I use Fertility Friend and have found this a very useful tool for charting.

Good luck and lots of baby dust.

If you need any more information, or just a shoulder to cry on, we are always here.

Hi,sorry for the delayed reply. thank you for your response. i have had preg symptoms, nausea, dizziness, flutterytummy, can't sleep on front, weeing more, tired. i am now 11 dpo, neg pt at 7 dpo. tonight had tingly and itchy boobs cramps like AF coming. fingers crossed its good news. 3 days til AF due. am i just hoping?

 

[josie1234]

Hi, I am 42 and DH 45. I have 12 yr old son from first marriage and DH has 2 children from first marriage who are 21 and 19 yrs. Unfortunately, I found out I had miscarried on our anniversary in Jun 2012 after 4 years of ttc. It was a lovely shock to find out I was expecting as didn't think it was going to happen but didn't want to go down all the medical routes, just thought, it will happen if its meant to be. I found out there was no heartbeat at my 12-week scan (Jun) but I had started bleeding a couple of days before, the baby's heartbeat had stopped at 9 weeks. I was so devastated and thought it was cruel to tease us and then take our lovely child away. I understand that maybe something was wrong and we agreed to carry on ttc. I would have been due to give birth on 4 Jan 13. We are trying not to get obsessive about it but I would be so happy to be pregnant before its too late. My period is due 21st Jan but they have been a bit all over the place but I am tracking them with periodtracker app. Today I am supposed to ovulating according to the app but I have creamy discharge, no odour. Does this mean anything? Lots of baby dust to those ttc and good luck to you all in 2013 for happiness xxx

Hi welcome to our group and so sorry for your loss.

I am 41 and DH is 43. I have DS 11, DD 8 and DD 2.

I lost my first at 8 weeks in July 09. I lost another at 13 weeks last Jan - we found out on 9th jan when i thought I was 17 weeks that baby had died approx 13-14 weeks, this was after a healthy nuchal scan at 12 weeks. My LO was born sleeping 12th jan 12.

We then TTC again in May and in August i was PG again, went for a scan at 7 weeks and all was good, went for a scan at 9 weeks at the end of sept and found baby had died the day before.

We have just started to TTC again this month and i OV on xmas day and got my BFP yesterday, so I am now hoping and praying this will work.

Are you using OPK because this is really the best way of telling when you are about to OV, used in conjuction with CM. On the run up to OV the CM becomes watery and a just before becomes just like egg white, this indicates OV is around the corner.

After OV Cm can dry up or can go creamy, so from what you are saying you may have already OV.

Are you tracking your temperature each morning as well?

I use Fertility Friend and have found this a very useful tool for charting.

Good luck and lots of baby dust.

If you need any more information, or just a shoulder to cry on, we are always here.

Hi,sorry for the delayed reply. thank you for your response. i have had preg symptoms, nausea, dizziness, flutterytummy, can't sleep on front, weeing more, tired. i am now 11 dpo, neg pt at 7 dpo. tonight had tingly and itchy boobs cramps like AF coming. fingers crossed its good news. 3 days til AF due. am i just hoping?

Forgot to say, fingers crossed for you that everything goes ok. i used periodtracker app. don't take temperature. Thanks xx

 

[Oasis717]

Josie my baby was due 7th Jan 2013, I lost our angel on 23 June 2012, I know exactly how you feel and the due date was a very hard day for us. We are trying to look to the future and be hopeful but after them also suffering a loss in Sep 2012 it is hard, this cycle will be the third since our last loss and I have started charting this month which I've found really helpful. Also with both my last pregnancies I had a tingly feeling in my boobs and this alone led me to believe I was pregnant, and I was, so that's a good sign. I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish you every happiness and luck in the future xxx

 

[josie1234]

Josie my baby was due 7th Jan 2013, I lost our angel on 23 June 2012, I know exactly how you feel and the due date was a very hard day for us. We are trying to look to the future and be hopeful but after them also suffering a loss in Sep 2012 it is hard, this cycle will be the third since our last loss and I have started charting this month which I've found really helpful. Also with both my last pregnancies I had a tingly feeling in my boobs and this alone led me to believe I was pregnant, and I was, so that's a good sign. I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish you every happiness and luck in the future xxx

Hi, 4th Jan was a tough day being our due date and I have been hoping since June when we got our news. Its all you can do is look to the future and hope. Sorry to hear about your losses, its so tough and no words can even begin to heal the pain. Thank you for your thoughts and wishes. AF came this morning. gutted as i was convinced, even dreamt i done pos pt last night. is my mind or body playing tricks. don't know what the hell is going on. my cycles aren't regular which doesn't help as I am 2 days early. I am averaging at 32 day cycles. do i keep trying,give up or what. i seem to be getting obsessive about this at the moment. at least i know i can get pregnant as when we were trying it took 4 years and i thought it wasn't going to happen so wasn't even thinking about it and that's when it happened. Fingers crossed for you Oasis for some good news, maybe 2013 is the year for us all xxxx

 

[dancareoi]

Josie my baby was due 7th Jan 2013, I lost our angel on 23 June 2012, I know exactly how you feel and the due date was a very hard day for us. We are trying to look to the future and be hopeful but after them also suffering a loss in Sep 2012 it is hard, this cycle will be the third since our last loss and I have started charting this month which I've found really helpful. Also with both my last pregnancies I had a tingly feeling in my boobs and this alone led me to believe I was pregnant, and I was, so that's a good sign. I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish you every happiness and luck in the future xxx

Hi, 4th Jan was a tough day being our due date and I have been hoping since June when we got our news. Its all you can do is look to the future and hope. Sorry to hear about your losses, its so tough and no words can even begin to heal the pain. Thank you for your thoughts and wishes. AF came this morning. gutted as i was convinced, even dreamt i done pos pt last night. is my mind or body playing tricks. don't know what the hell is going on. my cycles aren't regular which doesn't help as I am 2 days early. I am averaging at 32 day cycles. do i keep trying,give up or what. i seem to be getting obsessive about this at the moment. at least i know i can get pregnant as when we were trying it took 4 years and i thought it wasn't going to happen so wasn't even thinking about it and that's when it happened. Fingers crossed for you Oasis for some good news, maybe 2013 is the year for us all xxxx

Hi Josie, sorry your AF came.

Don`t give up, just keep on in there, it will happen.

Are you charting? My cycles have never been regualr, but the one thing is certain each month your Luteal Phase never changes, it in the OV date that changes. My shortest OV date was 16 days and my longest 22 days! Last month I OV day 21!!!

CM spotting, charting and OPK is really helpful and it will give you a very good idea of how your body is working. Your LP needs to be 12 days plus for a decent one, mine has been 10 days for a long time.Hence the reason I am now inserting progesterone twice a day!

i started taking vitamin B6 and having acupuncture and I got an 11 day LP last time!

Think of this month as the start of a new journey and see what happens!

OASIS -

 

[josie1234]

Josie my baby was due 7th Jan 2013, I lost our angel on 23 June 2012, I know exactly how you feel and the due date was a very hard day for us. We are trying to look to the future and be hopeful but after them also suffering a loss in Sep 2012 it is hard, this cycle will be the third since our last loss and I have started charting this month which I've found really helpful. Also with both my last pregnancies I had a tingly feeling in my boobs and this alone led me to believe I was pregnant, and I was, so that's a good sign. I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish you every happiness and luck in the future xxx

Hi, 4th Jan was a tough day being our due date and I have been hoping since June when we got our news. Its all you can do is look to the future and hope. Sorry to hear about your losses, its so tough and no words can even begin to heal the pain. Thank you for your thoughts and wishes. AF came this morning. gutted as i was convinced, even dreamt i done pos pt last night. is my mind or body playing tricks. don't know what the hell is going on. my cycles aren't regular which doesn't help as I am 2 days early. I am averaging at 32 day cycles. do i keep trying,give up or what. i seem to be getting obsessive about this at the moment. at least i know i can get pregnant as when we were trying it took 4 years and i thought it wasn't going to happen so wasn't even thinking about it and that's when it happened. Fingers crossed for you Oasis for some good news, maybe 2013 is the year for us all xxxx

Hi Josie, sorry your AF came.

Don`t give up, just keep on in there, it will happen.

Are you charting? My cycles have never been regualr, but the one thing is certain each month your Luteal Phase never changes, it in the OV date that changes. My shortest OV date was 16 days and my longest 22 days! Last month I OV day 21!!!

CM spotting, charting and OPK is really helpful and it will give you a very good idea of how your body is working. Your LP needs to be 12 days plus for a decent one, mine has been 10 days for a long time.Hence the reason I am now inserting progesterone twice a day!

i started taking vitamin B6 and having acupuncture and I got an 11 day LP last time!

Think of this month as the start of a new journey and see what happens!

OASIS -

Thanks for the reply. I won't give up. I've only been doing the Pregnancy tracker app, putting on there symptoms, cm, moods, when me and DH have been active so don't think that is charting or used OPK (is that ovulation prediction kit?), not really up-to-date on the abbreviations. Can you explain LP please?

 

[Oasis717]

Josie I've dreamt of holding a baby, being pregnant, even being sick from morning sickness, I think when you want something as badly as us it's bound to reflect in dreams, definitely don't give up hunni, try charting, it's simple really just need to take your temperature every morning before doing anything and at the same time. I use fertilityfriend website which I know a lot of ladies do. Dancareoi is right it doesn't matter about the length of your cycles as your ovulation day can vary a lot but the luteal phase which is the time from when you ovulate to when your period arrives stays the same, as dancareoi says it should really be 12 days plus as anything less than that can make getting pregnant hard as the uterine lining starts to break down too soon making implantation difficult. I found myself getting quite possessed with getting pregnant over the last couple of months, it was all I could think or talk about and I had to make myself take a few steps back and relax. It's so hard when you want so much to be pregnant. The charting gives you something to focus on and its good to see where you are in your cycle, it also takes into account your opks and cervical mucus etc so you get a good overall picture. Dancareoi is proof it's not too late. That gives me so much hope xxxxx

 

[josie1234]

Josie I've dreamt of holding a baby, being pregnant, even being sick from morning sickness, I think when you want something as badly as us it's bound to reflect in dreams, definitely don't give up hunni, try charting, it's simple really just need to take your temperature every morning before doing anything and at the same time. I use fertilityfriend website which I know a lot of ladies do. Dancareoi is right it doesn't matter about the length of your cycles as your ovulation day can vary a lot but the luteal phase which is the time from when you ovulate to when your period arrives stays the same, as dancareoi says it should really be 12 days plus as anything less than that can make getting pregnant hard as the uterine lining starts to break down too soon making implantation difficult. I found myself getting quite possessed with getting pregnant over the last couple of months, it was all I could think or talk about and I had to make myself take a few steps back and relax. It's so hard when you want so much to be pregnant. The charting gives you something to focus on and its good to see where you are in your cycle, it also takes into account your opks and cervical mucus etc so you get a good overall picture. Dancareoi is proof it's not too late. That gives me so much hope xxxxx

Thank you Oasis. I looked up luteal phase and each month mine is 13 days so that makes me feel a bit better. I will start taking temp and look at fertilityfriend website. yeh, dancareoi's story gives me hope so i won't give up and i do need to take a step back. I think you are right, when you want something so bad, it does overtake your thougts. So, do you do the charting on fertilityfriend? I wasn't really paying too much attention on cm until the last month. hope 2013 is the time for us all as i am not getting any younger lol. Babydust to everyone. xx

 

[dancareoi]

Josie I've dreamt of holding a baby, being pregnant, even being sick from morning sickness, I think when you want something as badly as us it's bound to reflect in dreams, definitely don't give up hunni, try charting, it's simple really just need to take your temperature every morning before doing anything and at the same time. I use fertilityfriend website which I know a lot of ladies do. Dancareoi is right it doesn't matter about the length of your cycles as your ovulation day can vary a lot but the luteal phase which is the time from when you ovulate to when your period arrives stays the same, as dancareoi says it should really be 12 days plus as anything less than that can make getting pregnant hard as the uterine lining starts to break down too soon making implantation difficult. I found myself getting quite possessed with getting pregnant over the last couple of months, it was all I could think or talk about and I had to make myself take a few steps back and relax. It's so hard when you want so much to be pregnant. The charting gives you something to focus on and its good to see where you are in your cycle, it also takes into account your opks and cervical mucus etc so you get a good overall picture. Dancareoi is proof it's not too late. That gives me so much hope xxxxx

Thank you Oasis. I looked up luteal phase and each month mine is 13 days so that makes me feel a bit better. I will start taking temp and look at fertilityfriend website. yeh, dancareoi's story gives me hope so i won't give up and i do need to take a step back. I think you are right, when you want something so bad, it does overtake your thougts. So, do you do the charting on fertilityfriend? I wasn't really paying too much attention on cm until the last month. hope 2013 is the time for us all as i am not getting any younger lol. Babydust to everyone. xx

I have used Fertility Friend for months, the basic charting is free of charge, you can upgrade to VIP which costs approx £11 for 90 days, this is useful in looking at your symptoms, but not essential.

As oasis says, you take your temp every morning, at around the saem time before you get out of bed. You put everything little thing on it and it gives you a monthly chart, which is very useful.

OPK is ovulation predictor kit. I start using one each day after AF finishes and i do it same time every day. However if you are checking CM as well, this will give you a lot clearer idea of when OV is coming. When CM really increases I do OPK morning and night to make sure i don`t miss it.

I have found that a day or two before i OV my temp rises very slightyl and on day ov OV I have a temp drop, followed by temp increase day after OV.

We DTD every other day on run up to OV. We DTD Tue, Thur, sat, sun and mon and I OV early hours of Tue.

it is good that your LP is 13 days.

 

[Oasis717]

Yes Josie that is really good 13 days, that's really positive, I do record my temps on fertilityfriend, I've only just started this month but I wish I had done it before now, together with your ovulation tests and cervical mucus you can concentrate your bd around your fertile time giving you a better chance of success, then after ovulation your temp will rise slightly due to the increase in the hormone progesterone, after 3 sustained rises and along with your other signs fertilityfriend will give you your ovulation day. So you have a much better picture of your cycle. There's a little link at the bottom of every post of mine that says MyOvulationChart. If you click on that it will take you to my chart and you can clearly see the rise in temp after ovulation xxxx

 

[dancareoi]

How is everyone enjoying the snow - kids are loving it!!

 

[Oasis717]

Yes our 4 year old is loving the snow! We've had virtually none til today then woken up to loads xxx

 

[dancareoi]

Yes our 4 year old is loving the snow! We've had virtually none til today then woken up to loads xxx

We had loads on Friday and it is snowing again a little today! Have to make the most of it.

our 2 year old goes about for about 10 mins, then he`s cold and wants to come back in.

 

[Oasis717]

Lol aww bless yes at that age they dont stay out long, my ds is making a snowman with daddy but I'm staying in the warm! Xx

 

[josie1234]

Thanks for all the helpful tips. I have been out and purchased a thermometer. I hope I do have to take temp from mouth lol as that's the one i've got ha ha. Also got a opk, 7 day one. they are not cheap eh? got a supermarket home brand to start with. God, do you have to buy a job lot of them to do it each month?? I feel a bit better now and not so down about things today. AF was really heavy yesterday and lots of cramp, then overnight i hardly filled tampon. sorry if tmi. see how today goes. hope everyone is having a good day. Gonna venture out in snow to take dog for walk, don't know if 12 yr old ds will join me, the lazy bones that he is. nice when they are younger cos snow is exciting but its not cool to be out with mum at this age. had to prize him out of house yesterday to go and buy a coat for him. Have a good one xxx

 

[Oasis717]

You can temp by other means but I prefer by mouth lol, just make sure you don't move the thermometer around when taking it and keep your mouth closed, you'll be fine hun. The opks are dear in the shops, even in Asda they are 4.50 for 5 tests whereas you can get 30 or 40 on eBay for that money so I always get mine off of there, glad you feel better, I'm really pleased I can see I've ovulated but I'm now worrying my pre ovulation temps are too low as they are in the 96 range and apparently you are supposed to have 97.5 or over just been reading about it. My temp this morning was 97.6 which is the highest its been and what apparently it should have been before ovulation. I've since read that low basal body temps can indicate low progesterone which in turn can cause early miscarriage which I've now had two. I spoke to my doc last week who completely dismissed any kind of testing until I've lost 3 babies, it's very unfair. Anyway I guess I can't do anything but hope. Enjoy your walk if you go! Xxxx

 

[josie1234]

Thanks Oasis. I will start taking temp tomorrow. I think there are so many things to think about, temperature, cm, luteal phase to work out ovulating. I'm surprised anyone gets pregnant to be honest. its like a science eh? It does seem to happen when you are not trying and not thinking about it which is hard cos its all i seem to think about at the moment. mind you, because of my age, it is difficult not to worry that its too late but there is hope. its not like its impossible. Yeh it does seem unfair that nothing gets looked into until after 3 miscarriages. it does make you wonder why they happen and if there's anything you could do to stop it happening again. All you can do is keep trying and keep hopeful. Miracles do happen. When i had my ds, you do take it for granted and think things happen so easy but now that I have had a miscarriage, I realise now how much babies go through to be born. My ds has now gone out with his mates so think i will have to brave the snow myself. not as much fun. I haven't been to my doctor yet. I don't really discuss all this with OH as I think he just thinks see what happens and if it happens then it does. He was gutted when miscarriage happened and he says that he understands it is worse for the woman. I hope you have a good day and try to stay positive xxx