TTC Chill out room

[Lyn]

hey hunni were doing the chilled our relaxed approach too .. again!.. it worked for us the first time we just didnt get a uber sticky bean so it does work... fingers crosed for everyone x

I'm sorry x

 

[ellieb31]

So how's everyone doing?

I'm good. It's the beginning of my cycle and AF is still here so there's no pressure to BD or anything else TTC related. Plus the sun is out which always does me the world of good (I do wonder if I have that SAD condition). It's supposed to be nice for at least the next five days which is good because we're going camping at the weekend (going to River Cottage HQ for dinner one night which I'm looking forward to but also slight scared as I'm not the bravest eater). And only 8 more working days until I have a week off in Tunisia - can't wait! I love the summer so much!!

Hope you are all well and chillaxed! xx

 

[gilz82]

Wow ellieb camping and then Tunisia it's all go for you!!

I'm just working away, trying to enjoy the sun when I get home from work and generally winding myself back down from last months insane "am I pregnant/no I'm not" yoyo-ing.

Feeling a lot calmer now I've realised there are other ladies out there who want to take a little step back from the madness. Hoping that by the time we start TTC again in august I'll be super relaxed and my body will just do what it was designed to do

Just got to keep believing we'll all get there eventually!!
Xxxx

 

[ArticBaby]

Hi Everyone

After 18 months ttc and getting more and more worked up each month, I have decided to take a different approach next month and stop stressing about it. I spend each tww on an emotional rollercoaster, desperately symptom spotting, trying to comfort myself when I get a BFN and convince myself that I might get a different result the next day or with a different test. I seem to think that if I can plan things down to the tiniest detail then it'll be my month but mother nature just doesn't work like that.

Well no more! No more OPK's, no more HPK's before AF is late, no charting teps, CM and CP, no supplements (other than folic acid) or softcups. No nothing other than regular BD'ing and enjoying the process. Maybe it'll take a little bit longer but I think the benefit to the baby of not having a mum who is stressed to the max for the first few weeks will be well worth it and maybe it won't take any longer - they say stress can damage your chances after all. And hopefully I won't turn into a crazy bundle of nerves in the mean time! I really don't want to end up depressed when I'm doing something which is the most natural thing in the world.

If there's anyone else out there who wants to take a step away from all of the pressure and disappointment of ttc, please come and join me! We can still support each other through the highs and lows of this journey, just without the pressure of daily temping, CP and CM charting, supplement on top of supplement, BDing to a pattern etc etc.

I really hope that this doesn't offend anyone - I don't mean to undermine what you are doing or why you are doing it and we have all walked different paths to get where we are today. I just want to try something different before ttc takes over my life.

Im in

 

[xxBubsxx]

Hi Ladies how's the chilled out crew getting on?

Ellie it's not long til your holidays you lucky thing! You'll be so distracted and chilled out you'll have no problems staying relaxed this month I bet.

I'm on holidays too but using the time to try and finish my thesis another reason to try and get control of the TTC obsession! I've spent too much time symptom spotting on bnb instead of writing my thesis in previous months but not this one I swear!

I've decided to get back into my yoga and have just booked a massage for this weekend. The massage place has a graduate school on Sundays so it's only £20 for an hour

Anyone else got any good tips for relaxation?? This cat is my inspiration for this month!!

 

[ellieb31]

Hello All

Bubs, love the cat!! Do have cats yourself? We've got three and they are very good for relaxation - it's what they specialise in after all! I can't imagine how put out they're going to be once there's a baby in the house though - they stay away when my nieces and nephews are here!!

Good luck with your thesis - I hope you don't have to spend too much of the summer trapped indoors!

Gilz, I think you're right that we'll all get there in the end. I know we all want it to happen RIGHT NOW and it's frustrating how little it is actually in our control. I'm sure by the end of the year all of us will be carrying at one stage or another and that's something to look forward to!

Hi Artic, how you doing?

 

[minidyson]

Hi ladies. So it is around ovulation time for me, I know because I get cramps. Had a day off yesterday for the footie so I got my legs waxed, had a hair cut and drank a lot of Pimms in the sunshine with friends....

It's so much nicer not to be reaching for the thermometer every morning and my POAS habit is hopeully subsiding!!!

How are we all?

 

[gilz82]

Hi ladies. So it is around ovulation time for me, I know because I get cramps. Had a day off yesterday for the footie so I got my legs waxed, had a hair cut and drank a lot of Pimms in the sunshine with friends....

It's so much nicer not to be reaching for the thermometer every morning and my POAS habit is hopeully subsiding!!!

How are we all?

Sounds like you had a good day

I'm still temping this cycle, but not out of obsessive-ness more out of a need to learn about my cycle. Once i'm done with this cycle that's me, the thermometer will be banished.

We aren't trying this month, do don't know if it's just that, but i definitly feel more relaxed about the TTC process. I know plenty of people do get their while symptom spotting and POAS and analysing everything but....I have to admit when you think about it logically being more chilled and relaxed about it must be helpful.

FX'd it works for us all anyway
xx

 

[ellieb31]

Morning Ladies

I'm still chillaxed but I'm only on CD 7 so that's the easy bit over! AF wasn't a chore this month though - it was a break from the madness but I'm sure looking forward to some BDing again!!

We've got lovely weather and we're heading off camping this afternoon so will hopefully be a great weekend (with much too much food judging by my heaving fridge!) Next week will be when it becomes slightly more testing - I'll be oving and I'm not going to POAS this time. At the end of the day, you don't need to know the exact moment that you ovulated as long as you BD every other day around the right time. I just need to make sure I remember this in a few days! And judging by my hormones for the last couple of months we'll be BDing more than every other day - which is fine - as long as we do what's natural to us rather than making sure we've done it enough or not too much.

Mini, that sounds like a lovely day off! I really must remember to get myself groomed before we go on holiday - I've not had a hair cut for a couple of months and my split ends need sorting out!

Gilz, one of my friends was very stressed about ttc, went to see her doctor and balled her eyes out, got pregnant the very next cycle - so I'm sure that the stress does make a difference even though I spent a couple of months telling myself that it was under control.

xxxx

 

[Groovychick]

Morning Ladies

I'm still chillaxed but I'm only on CD 7 so that's the easy bit over! AF wasn't a chore this month though - it was a break from the madness but I'm sure looking forward to some BDing again!!

We've got lovely weather and we're heading off camping this afternoon so will hopefully be a great weekend (with much too much food judging by my heaving fridge!)
xxxx

Hope you have a lovely time!

 

[gilz82]

Hi guys

How's everyone doing?

I'm having a bit of a wobble this week, i've been temping properly this cycle so i can learn about when i OV and then i'm going to leave my body alone. I'm pretty sure i've OV'd already, although it would be early for me, but i had a temp dip and EWCM etc and then 3 higher temps. Fertility friend still isn't seeing it as OV tho!!

Also saw my kidney consultant this week, this is the first time i've seen him since we started TTC after getting my kidney out. He's arranged for me to have 21 day bloods done next tuesday as aparently fertility problems are a common side effect of long term kidney issues, which he's decided not to mention until now for reasons known only to himself, even though we've always been open about trying for a family once i was well enough!!

I'm so angry, this was supposed to be my chilled out month in preparation for TTC again in August and now i'm up to a hundred worrying about something i didn't even know could be a side effect of the kidney problems

Anyhoo rant over, hope you lovely ladies are all doing well
and
xxx

 

[ellieb31]

Hi guys

How's everyone doing?

I'm having a bit of a wobble this week, i've been temping properly this cycle so i can learn about when i OV and then i'm going to leave my body alone. I'm pretty sure i've OV'd already, although it would be early for me, but i had a temp dip and EWCM etc and then 3 higher temps. Fertility friend still isn't seeing it as OV tho!!

Also saw my kidney consultant this week, this is the first time i've seen him since we started TTC after getting my kidney out. He's arranged for me to have 21 day bloods done next tuesday as aparently fertility problems are a common side effect of long term kidney issues, which he's decided not to mention until now for reasons known only to himself, even though we've always been open about trying for a family once i was well enough!!

I'm so angry, this was supposed to be my chilled out month in preparation for TTC again in August and now i'm up to a hundred worrying about something i didn't even know could be a side effect of the kidney problems

Anyhoo rant over, hope you lovely ladies are all doing well
and
xxx

Bless you gilz, that's totally typical that at the point when you're trying to put it out of your mind something like this comes up. I can't believe that they didn't mention it to you at the time, it's amazing how short sighted some people can be but it's verging on ridiculous if they knew that you were going to be ttc once you were better. Try not to stress out about it - I think being angry is probably the healthiest response you could have. And at least it means you're getting looked at and tested sooner rather than later.

One of the reasons I need to chill out on the ttc front is that I had done all of this stuff, like giving up smoking and drinking, taking supplements etc and DH wasn't doing anything like it. He was still smoking and so on and I just ended up feeling like it was pointless making all of that effort myself when there might be a problem from his side. So rather than give up smoking and drinking, DH has booked himself in for SA. If the tests come back good, he can smoke and drink to his hearts content. If they come back that there is a problem, he'll give up. I feel much better about this arrangement because I just didn't see the point in making all of this effort on my own - it takes two to make a baby after all.

I'm around CD 14 and no EWCM yet (not OPKing, temping etc) so I'm not sure if I've actually ovulated this month. Last cycle I O'd on CD 13 and it was CD 14 the month before that. Maybe I'm just having a late month. I don't know but it doesn't really matter. It sounds awful but I really believe that there might be a problem with the SA and I just think that we're passing time until he gets those results.

Off to Tunisia on Sunday!! WOO HOO!!!

 

[gilz82]

Hey ellieb

That's great that your DH is taking some of the responibility off your shoulders, i honestly think men just have no understanding of how stressful the whole TTC process is. Plus at least you'll know where you stand one way or another after the tests.

Have a great time in Tunisia, it's only 49 days til i go on holiday not that i'm counting

 

[ellieb31]

It's funny really because until the tests got booked I hadn't appreciated how much I felt like it was totally my responsibility. He really wants a baby too but he thinks it's highly likely that we can't have them so he hasn't felt any pressure to change his lifestyle. At least this way we'll know. I truely want children but if we can't I want to know sooner rather than later so that I don't have months of emotional heartache for no reason.

Where are you going on holiday? (sorry if you've already said!)

 

[gilz82]

I know what you mean, I'd rather know sooner rather than later if there was going to be a serious problem TTC rather than just trying every month and hoping.

We are off to Mexico on holiday. I'm
so excited, we've not been away for a few years cos of my kidney problem, plus with my OH working away from home it'll be great just to spend a whole fortnight together!

Xx

 

[Summersun]

Hi everyone
Can I join you? I'm new to the site but have been TTC for about six months - initially I planned it with military precision - CBFM, temping, the lot - and it just got me totally worked up. So I ditched all that and now just rely on CM to tell me if I've ovulated. I also have weekly acupuncture. I've had all the tests and nothing is "wrong", my doctor and Acu both think my anxiety is the only thing getting in the way of conceiving.

Ditching all the cr4p has certainly helped but I do still get teary when AF arrives. I'm 11DPO now and have just had the startings of brownish CM so I know AF is coming and my heart just sank. Such a horrible feeling.

Something utterly random to cheer you up on a Friday night - my hubby is a scientist and he was explaining to me that the reason humans are uber species is because we learned to walk to two legs which gave us all kinds of benefits. The drawback to this is our fertility - both in terms of conceiving (way lower rate than most four legged mammals!) and giving birth is much harder and much more painful because of the way our pelvis has formed. So, when TTC is getting you down just remember it's difficult but if it wasn't we wouldn't have shopping, chocolate, wine, George Clooney, all the other wonderfulness that being two legged brings us!

Looking forwards to the TTC relaxtion thread xx

 

[A43]

Hi
i think I am goin to try and chill this month (month 3). I am due on today and its coming! I have had a terrible 2ww...obsession with forums, temping,timing,not doing anything to occupy my time to make it easier for myself.
So this month I am goin to rely on my CBFM - ditch the temps - forum once a week not 4times a day - b6 vits and folic - use my gym membership and try and lose some weight. Also i am not going to put my life on hold anymore! what will be will be this month fingers crossed
A4

 

[ellieb31]

Mexico sounds lovely, one of the places I want to visit one day.

I'm off on hols tomorrow so won't be around for a week but I just wanted to say welcome to the new ladies

I hope you all have a good week and don't get too wound up during any tww's that are happening (including me!)

xx

 

[gilz82]

Hi Summersun and A43

Hopefully a more relaxed attitude will help us all with TTC, and in the mean time as Summersun mentioned we can be grateful for chocolate and George Clooney


xx

 

[sianyld]

Hey guys! u all ok.

This is our 14 month of ttc! its strarting to drive me rund the bend! I really want to be rid of the stress and try and rela so im up for joining your group! ttc is starting to take over my life and thats not how it shud b. Guess all ur life u think it wont b a prob but u neva know hey! nice to chat with people who know wat im going through.

good luck all xx