Tubal Reversal ladies, just moved from WTT!!!

[~Brandy~]

Angie- I am sooooooooooo happy for you!! it's been a long time coming lady and you deserve it.

I squealed when I read that and woke one of the twins! OOps.

 

[AngienDaniel]

Thanks Brandy! Now all I have to do is take things day by day and try not to look at every little thing as negative. I actually got to sleep a little later this morning. For some reason my time clock has been switched and I can't go to sleep at night. Before, I was in bed by 9pm. Now I yawn all day and don't sleep well.
I will be 5 weeks tomorrow. As of yesterday I made it farther than I ever have. That in itself is enough to celebrate. I do feel that this is our keep baby. I am positive!
I wish I wasn't so turned off food though. It is hard to eat healthy when everything you look at makes you feel blah! I know it sounds bad, but even though I miss my husband like crazy, I am a little happy he is gone for this month so I don't have to be worried about anything sexual during these weeks. I should be a little farther along and a little more confident by the time he gets back in middle July.

 

[cupcakestoy]

Hey girls. Feeling like an awful friend today I find myself resentful & pulling away from my friend who is pregnant. Of course it doesn't help that she just sent me an update that everything is peachy & "baby smith" is due Feb. 2nd...ugh...I hate feeling this way. I guess it just hurts because she knows everything about our Journey & she did not want another, but is carrying a new life.....Her sister is 6 months pregnant & dh actually thinks they tried to get a bfp, since she likes to be the center of attention & admitted to being jealous of her sis. I don't really know, but I just feel like I don't know how I can deal with this & not completely lose it. I know I'm not being fair. I know I'm jealous. I have prayed & prayed for God to help me with my issues, but man this is hard....I don't want to act this way, it feels childish & immature. It just hurts. I can't for the life of me figure out why God continues to give this gift to those around me that don't want & in my opinion don't need another child. They struggle financially & have 2 kids that they can't handle now. Her kid stole a car last year at the age of 11, has been smoking & drinking. Its crazy. The kids don not have boundaries or discipline. Honestly that alone has put a strain on our friendship. The other gal that is pregnant has 3, a bad marriage & on welfare & still is not happy about the baby. I just can't wrap my mind around why when we have so much to offer & so much love to give & want a baby so much but the door keeps getting slammed shut in our face? Sorry to be such a whiny, spoiled baby on here, but I have no one else to talk to like I can to you gals...My heart just hurts today....

 

[stmom26]

Congrats Angie!

 

[AngienDaniel]

Cupcake, I know how you feel. I used to cry my eyes out every single time my sister would say she was pregnant. 6 times.. Once a year. I had to watch her belly grow and be there when they were born and I tell you, it was more difficult to do that than this journey has been. I had to hide my sadness and jealousy and pray to God and tell Him that I didn't understand why He was being so harsh. (Yes, I do talk to God like he's my bestie.)
Anyhow. THIS CRAP SUCKS! Even when you get your baby, you are covered in fear. I can give you some advice. After you get your positive pregnancy test, stop using them. It is stressful and worrisome. Let whatever will happen, happen, and just praise God anyway. I know it's hard, but God wants us to accept His will for us, and not worry about what others are doing... that's why there is a commandment to not covet... Being glad for someone else is the hardest thing I ever have to do sometimes.. Especially when there is no end in sight to the pain that comes from failing. I have to make myself pray and tell God that I want His will to be mine, no matter how it hurts me.
Not being jealous is hard to do. I didn't want to lose my sister over her ability to have babies so I hid away the struggle and jealousy and time went on. Even though admittedly, I still feel like she had so many kids just to be spiteful. She now has her tubes tied and I do not and I pray that God will let it be my turn and give me the good grace to not rub it in anyone's face. I hope I can at least gloat in private and never ever show publicly that I am rubbing it in.. (We all deserve to gloat privately.)
I hope you feel better. You have been pregnant once and you will be so again. Be patient and keep praying and God will give you the baby you want. I know I have told myself that everyday and still tell myself that now that I am pregnant.
Don't give up and be kind... these people sound like they need kindness cause their lives sound tough. Sounds like you have everything they don't have and they have one thing you want.. Kinda evens out and as long as you pray for them, God might give you the one thing they have that you don't yet.
I pray for you ladies everyday. I truly do.

AFM: I have been taking WalMart cheapie tests and took a CB Digital yesterday. Even though my hcg was 450 on Thursday, I still got a 1-2.. My Walmart tests are also not as dark as 18dpo. I have one more CB Digital that I will take tomorrow around noon and if it still says 1-2 I figure I am in for a struggle. My numbers should be over 900 by tomorrow. I learned a valuable lesson though: Never take a test after you get your positive. I will not forget that anytime soon. I still have pregnancy symptoms and still think my pregnancy is progressing, but can't explain the tests so I might be fooling myself. All I can do is wait and pray. I also have decided to not look up anything else about pregnancy. Nothing. I am not even gonna use my calendar anymore. I closed all of it out and I have been tracking for two years now.. I am done with it. I have no control over any of it, and I have to let it go now and accept that. Thank God, He is helping me. Not even a desire to use the internet for anything but schoolwork, which I got up to week 8 finished this morning since there is no more Googling.. I am currently week 5. Plus, I am getting my Mom's blanket I am making for her done.
I also decided that I am not going to the ER and I am going to wait until Thursday for my next blood draw. I will ask the doctor for a scan for the week after though if by chance all is well.

Fluter I am praying for your trip. Everyone else.. I am praying for you all too..

 

[BrandiCanucks]

I hate CB Digi's. They cause so much worry and anxiety and fear in women who don't see the result they expect to see. According to the company's quoted sensitivity levels, I should have seen a 3+ around 4w5d as my levels were WAY above the 2000 they quote. Except even at 5w1d with FMU and levels of 17,000, I was still only getting a 2-3. My levels were over 22,000 before I saw a 3+.

Don't fret Angie, and keep your faith in God. Keep faith that this is your keeper baby that He has given to you, and by gosh girl, stay off Dr. Google and maybe chuck those digi's if they're going to cause you worry and stress.

 

[momsbaby]

What do you ladies know about maca root. I bought some today, the lady at the vitamin store said its great to ttc

 

[~Brandy~]

Angie trust those digital beyond bfp! I didn't get 2-3 weeks even when I was 6 w 5 d with my twins. I thought for sure I would lose them... It just caused me a ton of panic that ended up with me having an ultrasound.

Fx for you!

 

[AngienDaniel]

I did chuck them... gladly.
I am at the point to where I seriously do not care anymore. My heart is like Fort Knox. If I miscarry then oh well. If I don't then oh well. I don't feel pregnant except for my boobs being tender and huge and the green veins that are everywhere and peeing so much and yawning all day. I do drink a lot more though than I did before. I also have to force myself to eat. Thinking about food makes me feel yucky! I just can't wait until Thursday so I can see if the number is still rising. It is so hard to wait, but if I move up the day I know that won't change anything except me knowing earlier. I do want to know earlier, but I don't want to know earlier. I am crying at every singe thing though. It's embarrassing. I am glad my husband is gone so he don't have to see me such a mess.
Momsbaby, I haven't taken it myself but a lot of women on the forums swear by it.

 

[Mommabrown]

Momsbaby Works wonders!!! I know a girl who tried for like a year and her 1st cycle using it she got her coincidence I dunno but it was the only factor that changed.

 

[fluterby429]

Those Walmart test are the worst!!! I learned this during the hcg trigger phase. FRER showed up well but nothing on the Walmart. I could even get lines on the dollar tree but stark white on Walmart. I'll never use them again.

 

[AngienDaniel]

I just decided not to test anymore and accept whatever comes my way. I have also decided to take a short break from the forums, as anything pregnancy related is stressing me out and also my emotions are all over the place. Gonna take a while and settle down cause everything seems amplified since my hubby is deployed and me missing him is tough at this time. Gonna spend my time crocheting and hanging out with my boy. We got a house to get ready for inspection so I am actually gonna shut my computer off at the end of the day and open it only to do homework. No Facebook, not even on my phone, just sitting outside enjoying the beautiful things around me. Passing the time until my baby gets home.
Praying for everyone! God bless!

 

[~Brandy~]

What do you ladies know about maca root. I bought some today, the lady at the vitamin store said its great to ttc

Sorry I have never used it.. But i have seen threads on the bnb board about it... You might search there

 

[~Brandy~]

Cupcake I was the same as you are now when I was ttcing. It was so rough for me to see coworkers getting pg that did the mean to... It was rough when it was someone that already had children that were in need of attention or help as they were having trouble in school or with the law. It pained me that we were totally ready and to provide emotionally and financially and it just didn't happen.. The why me was always there.

We all will get through it. Unfortunately everything happens for a reason

 

[LLawson]

Cupcake, I feel the same way as you! I see family and friends raising kids they dont want or not raising them properly and you know they are going to be in trouble all their lives. I have 2 nephews, one on each side of the family that got DUIs at 17 and 18. Their parents are horrible parents! I ask god everyday, why cant I have a child and want one so bad and it will never want for anything! All these others can pop them out every year and could care less about wanting them, having them or what happens to them when they get here. Everything around here is about getting a check for each child you have.....the more you have, the more you get! Living off the babies they dont take care of! That makes me so sick! I think they should crack down on the welfare system. The ones that are getting it arent taking care of their babies anyway. Ugh! Disgusts me! Thats my rant for today! Sorry ladies! Cupcake I just wanted you to know you arent the only one that feels the way you do!

 

[LLawson]

Afm, Im only cycle day 43. 14dpo. BFN and no symptoms of AF of pregnancy! Im one cranky bitty right now! The longer I go without AF the worse I get😁.
We had a race in Ohio this past weekend, it was hot one minute super cold the next and with me being so cranky, I think all the guys were terrified of me! Ill just be glad when something happens!

 

[GalvanBaby]

Hi ladies. I think we are moving on to adoption. I have major doubts about IVF plus we can't afford to do both. Adoption just seems like the most likely option.

Flutter, I am still checking out hotels in the area.

 

[cupcakestoy]

What do you ladies know about maca root. I bought some today, the lady at the vitamin store said its great to ttc

We trried it with no luck, but we are the poster child for failure lol don't go by me!

I just decided not to test anymore and accept whatever comes my way. I have also decided to take a short break from the forums, as anything pregnancy related is stressing me out and also my emotions are all over the place. Gonna take a while and settle down cause everything seems amplified since my hubby is deployed and me missing him is tough at this time. Gonna spend my time crocheting and hanging out with my boy. We got a house to get ready for inspection so I am actually gonna shut my computer off at the end of the day and open it only to do homework. No Facebook, not even on my phone, just sitting outside enjoying the beautiful things around me. Passing the time until my baby gets home.

Praying for everyone! God bless!

Good for you! Just enjoy it & I don't blame you for taking a break from the forums & FB! We all need a break at some point! Hope all is well!

Cupcake I was the same as you are now when I was ttcing. It was so rough for me to see coworkers getting pg that did the mean to... It was rough when it was someone that already had children that were in need of attention or help as they were having trouble in school or with the law. It pained me that we were totally ready and to provide emotionally and financially and it just didn't happen.. The why me was always there.

We all will get through it. Unfortunately everything happens for a reason

True. Still doesn't make it any easier, but I'll be ok. Come too far to quit now..*sigh Just overly ready to get a keeper BFP!

Cupcake, I feel the same way as you! I see family and friends raising kids they dont want or not raising them properly and you know they are going to be in trouble all their lives. I have 2 nephews, one on each side of the family that got DUIs at 17 and 18. Their parents are horrible parents! I ask god everyday, why cant I have a child and want one so bad and it will never want for anything! All these others can pop them out every year and could care less about wanting them, having them or what happens to them when they get here. Everything around here is about getting a check for each child you have.....the more you have, the more you get! Living off the babies they dont take care of! That makes me so sick! I think they should crack down on the welfare system. The ones that are getting it arent taking care of their babies anyway. Ugh! Disgusts me! Thats my rant for today! Sorry ladies! Cupcake I just wanted you to know you arent the only one that feels the way you do!

Thanks LL! It helps to just know I'm not alone in feeling like I do

Hi ladies. I think we are moving on to adoption. I have major doubts about IVF plus we can't afford to do both. Adoption just seems like the most likely option.

Flutter, I am still checking out hotels in the area.

I wish you well in which ever direction you go

AFM- Well, yet another BFP announcement today :/ This time its from my useless cousin, ugh, but won't even go there...I spoke with my Pastor's wife & she assured me, its ok to protect my heart & that I don't have to be there to suffer through this pregnancy. Said if it she keeps up with the updates to just tell her I can't handle it. She will throw a fit, but guess I'm past caring....I do feel better since we got away this last week & took the boat out yesterday Who can be un-happy on a Pontoon? lol Had a good day at work until I backed into a light pole, But just ended up with a dent, so no real damage. Heading out to weed my flower beds.....before dh cuts them all down :/....Hope everyone is doing good today!

 

[FaithHopeLove]

Galvan, we would LOVE to adopt, too! it seems like a daunting venture...not to say it's not worth it, but WOW! They make it so, so hard and involved! All these children growing up without parents due in large to all the politics!!! And you know what happens...start the adoption process and you'll get preggers I've read that over and over and seen it first hand!

Angie, so excited to hear your good news later this week. AND THANK YOU for posting your lineup of what you'd been taking and doing...

Afm, AF should be here today or tomorrow...like LL, I've had a long cycle I didn't O until CD23 and then I've had a 13 day LP...
I'm starting the herbal tincture that Mrs.T talked about. Herb Pharm Woman's Reproductive Health. It will be here tomorrow... Even if this doesn't help me get preggers, I'd really LOVE to have more balanced hormones!!! You know those few days around ovulation that you feel GREAT..not much bothers you, increased sex drive etc....COULD SOMEONE PLEASE BOTTLE THAT?! I'm also tired of having a PMS migraine every single cycle!! So anywho, hoping the herbs might help I also started the Fast Metabolism Diet! Has anyone else done this? I have several friends who are having great success with it! This is just day two..but so far I love it! The menu is far more balanced than anything I've seen thus far, diet wise. I'll keep you all posted on my loss. My goal is 20-25 lbs.

Hope everyone is having beautiful, summery weather Ours has been crazy...hot and cold supposed have snow in the mountains tonight...back to the 80's next week.

 

[GalvanBaby]

You are right, Faith! It happens all the time. A ftiend of ours found out she was pregnant the day their adoption was finalized for 3 kids. Lol

Here in Mexico, it is extremely difficult to adopt. We are starting the process, but won't be ready for another year more or less. I am excited to no longer have to use fertility meds and to still be getting a baby!!