Angie, I want to move to my hometown which is 45 minutes away. He previously agreed to me moving there, so according to the court order, I can live where I live now, or back in my hometown where my family is. Anywhere else, I need to get his permission or a further court order allowing it.
Moving in a hurry would be so that he can't get a court order taking that back and preventing us from moving near my family. His current access would not be affected or harmed in any way by my moving, nor would my proposal for extra access. I would do all the travelling, all drop offs and pick ups. He works in the same city that I am looking to move to, so a Friday to Sunday access on his weekend, he could pick them up after work, and I would drive back here to pick them back up again and bring them back home.
I also want to move there because my college programs are there and want to make sure we have secure finances and a secure home before applying. I won't have any problem getting in, as I have been accepted in the past.
If he got the kids 4 days a week, Asher loses his siblings, the kids lose Asher, they would lose their RESPs cuz half of my income would disappear and go to him. I would lose the subsidy on the house, and would be forced to move out because I would no longer qualify for the size of the home I have. We would end up homeless. There is so much destruction at the end of this if he wins.
I am in no way attempting to remove the kids from his reach (although with all he has put us through, he doesn't deserve them and Child Services is already on the verge of removing his unsupervised access and filing a motion to support such move). I would be proposing extra access when I go to defend having full custody.
It is extremely complicated. And with our special needs child, she is medically fragile and in need of a genetic test that her geneticist can't proceed with until he has all of our bloodwork. He refused to show up to that appointment, instead claiming I didn't tell him about it. He told CAS I didn't tell him, when I actually told him in front of them, AND sent him a reminder a week in advance. He has had the requisition for it for over a month and still refuses to submit his bloodwork. I now have to get a court order forcing him to submit it, as well as defend full custody. I don't mind giving extra access...an extra visit in the week and extend his weekend access, but he already doesn't take advantage of the access he has. He is doing it to keep control, make me panic, to hurt me. He doesn't care about the kids. He refused to take the kids their winter gloves last week when they forgot them in his van. It was -30 here and he said he wasn't bringing the gloves unless I gave him access to my house and garage.
He is extremely abusive and manipulative. He is telling the kids to tell Child Services I abuse them and to make them live with him. It is a very messy situation. I need to protect my kids and the best way is to move and the lawyer says to do it before he gets an order preventing me from moving. Our next court date is March 25.
Cupcake...I'm on maternity leave, so no, I have nothing I can borrow from
