Tubal Reversal ladies, just moved from WTT!!!

[AngienDaniel]

I am popping in, and with a test but not really a surprise. The line is very very light. I really feel like it is still the trigger and I am one of the very unlucky ones that the trigger lasts forever. I told ny husband this morning to not be too hopeful and he almost cried all the while telling me that he has to hope or he would spend all day sobbing. It made me so sad and I am already so emotional. I know I still have a little time left to get a positive but I just dont know if God has it in mind for me this time. I wont be testing tomorrow as I only have one test left and then will be waiting until Monday on my blood test day. I will test Friday morning. I will be working hard to save the money and will even be doing a gofundme and Bonfire accounts to. Raise money from my family. Telling my mom today that I was getting negatives made me so sad. I dont want to tell anyone next time. I havent told anyone but her and my son and have kept it private except for you guys. I will be keeping it even more private next time. If I have to go again then my hubby will be losing a week of his vacation that he was gonna take when our babies are due so he can be there for retrieval and transfer. I dont understand how people go for more than one go with full IVF as these small cycles are so stressful to me. And not getting pregnant and just peeing all that money down the pot is a horrid experience.

Brandy, I normally dont say bad words but I think I might not have been able to prevent one from slipping through. He is a total jackass and I hate bad doctors.

Fluter, I am glad you are having a few good days here and there.. I know this is probably silly but do you drink caffeine?

Jen, I am excited here waiting for your scans.

If this turns out negative for me I am gonna have a busy next few months. Makes me wanna scream really.

 

[Jenafyr4]

Looks darker to me. When are you gonna test with FRE

 

[AngienDaniel]

I won't be Jen as we are broke until payday. I seriously have one test left and I figured I could test in two days and if it was getting a line then it would show better on Friday than on Thursday. I spent way too much money to go to New York and had to catch up this past pay period so I ended up spending over 1600 in one day. It was nuts! I will have a blood test WAY before I will be able to buy a FRER. Sucks, but it is what it is.. Coming up with the 6000$ to do the Micro-IVF took every single literal cent that we had and now I am playing catch-up. Honestly that's why I won't really mind asking my family to contribute to my infertility fund. I have a very big family and I am hoping that they will be generous and help us to fund some of our second go Even if it just covers the food for the week we have to be there. Some of them are going through their own problems, but they have lots of friends and it's worth a shot.
I will post my results on Friday and then whenever I get my blood results I will let you know. I will go Monday super early so I can get my results back maybe the same day..

 

[Jenafyr4]

I know about being broke. Sux this journey has cost us all so much, but it just shows the love and dedication we all have.

 

[GalvanBaby]

Angie, I am in my phone, but today looks darker. Can't wait for Friday! Send me the link to the gofundme when you make it!

 

[GalvanBaby]

Double post

 

[Mommabrown]

Angie I remember fluter thinking the same thing. Don't count your chickens till the eggs hatch yet hun.
I am praying hard for you.

 

[fluterby429]

Omg I'm saying bfp Angie. I promise you those Walmart test are crap compared to frer or even dollar tree. I think it's darker. I wish you had different tests! I'm half tempted to mail you a box

 

[Jenafyr4]

Fluter. I'm with you...

 

[LLawson]

Brandy, your girls are adorable! Remind me again why you have been bleeding that long? I must have missed something.
What is the difference between IVF and a mini IVF? I didnt know there was a difference until you ladies started talking about them.

 

[LLawson]

One more question and this is probably TMI. Im seeing some clots while on this period. I have not done that for a very long time. Do you think thats something to do with the Clomid? It used to be normal for me to see that but I dont remember it on the Clomid. He still wants me to minimize tampon use cause he said it can cause infections really quick in women thats had a TR so needless to say, I see everything wearing pads and it gets me thinking. I tried looking it up online but the answers are all totally different.

 

[cupcakestoy]

LL- Clomid thins your lining so you have less to shed=less clots & shorter/lighter period, at least for me....
Angie- It looks more obvious on today's test to me, fx'd!!!

 

[fluterby429]

LL mini IVF uses less meds over a shorter period of time. The goal is to get fewer eggs but better quality versus lots of eggs. As far as the clots, I've always gotten small to medium sizes clots, even on fertility meds. I wouldn't out too much thought into it unless they get over quarter sized.

 

[fluterby429]

I scheduled my HD Live ultrasound today. It's set for the 31st. I'll be just a couple days shy of 28 weeks. I looked up the best weeks to go and most said 26-29 weeks because there is more fluid for clearer pictures and less chance that baby looks squished. All 3 kids are going with us. It's at the same place we went early in the pregnancy where it's on a screen as big as the wall. We are all very excited to see him.

 

[BrandiCanucks]

That 11dpo looks darker than the 10dpo, Angie! Prayers this is it for you!!!

 

[BrandiCanucks]

Can't believe little A is 6 months old already! I thought it would go by slowly because winter always seems to last a long time in Canada, but it's gone by so fast!!!

 

[AngienDaniel]

My test is definitely negative. I was slightly prepared. I don't really understand but I am hoping to cry my heart out to God and get some things cleared up with Him as I feel that I have been let down in my faith. It angers me really. I know that I am more blessed than most as we can try again soon, but I feel such anger as it seems like God keeps blessing everyone but us. It is a natural reaction, but one I know I have to deal with quickly before depression gets to me. I will try again, but I don't like it and I won't be following any of the stupid rules they try to lay down for you as I feel that an embryo that can't survive a normal bath, won't survive this world. That's just me though. I have my 'official' test on Monday and that is another day to get by emotionally as my husband does not believe that I have failed yet again and is angry at me for calling negative. I feel that he is just making it more difficult for me and it makes me feel so much more worthless as he can't let go of his hope. I am leaving all my IVF groups on Facebook as I cannot bear to see any positives right now and I will check in on here every once in awhile as you girls are very special to me and I want to know how you all are doing, but I can't take anything pregnancy right now and all I see are babies everywhere. I will be finishing my college program this semester and crocheting a wardrobe for hope of having children eventually. I will also be trying to save/raise money and awareness with the people that are in my everyday life concerning infertility and the pain and loss it causes to the families it touches.
Please pray for me and my husband, that this failure does not put strife between us as he is my best friend and I don't know what I would do without him. He isn't dealing well so far with these results as we were so sure of ourselves.
I am praying for you all daily.

 

[cupcakestoy]

So sad for you Angie. Prayers sent....

 

[Jenafyr4]

Aww Angie, I'm so sorry and I pray you find peace. This journey is difficult and I have faith you will soon get your BFP.

 

[fluterby429]

Angie - I know how your heart feels and I hate it for you. Hang in there. I've seriously seen BFN and then BFP on the blood test. That's still 4 more days! I'm still going to hold on to hope for you and this round. I know if it doesn't turn out like you anticipated, you will dust yourself off and try again. Take some time for yourself but don't dwell too long. As far as the stuff they say to not do, I was seriously only told no bath for 3 days rest on ET (but not bed rest) and go back to normal life just no heavy lifting or sex until test day. I did exactly those things. Do I think it helped, no not really because people get pregnant everyday without knowing and go about regular life. IVF is a crazy roller coaster. We plan on doing the FET now and the though makes me cringe. Sending you a big hug and just know we are here for you.