3D ultrasound this weekend. I get to see Emelia again. At this stage, I'm hoping she's still a girl because I've stocked up, literally, on girl stuff, and the car seat is pink. My house has been pinkified, lol.I can't believe there's less than 3 months to go. I swear this has been the fastest one.
My GD testing came back yesterday and I passed the one hour glucose! So maybe just too much Halloween candy, lol.
I had a very empowering dream the other night.
I've had three dreams about giving birth to Emi my entire pregnancy. After gaining 16lbs in less than a month, I was giving up on my VBAC and scheduling a csection because the weight gain and higher blood pressure I had were the same signs I had with my son, at the same gestational onset, and it ended up leading to a very traumatic emergency csection that almost cose Asher. I've also had a great fear my entire pregnancy, likely because of the PTSD and nightmares I had after his birth, that I would not be bringing my daughter home.
All three dreams have been in a hospital setting. One, she was born early, into a toilet with no one else attending. The second, she was born onto the bed with no one else attending.
Last night, I had a third: She was born into my hands, no one else attending, and as I watched the cord pulse, she rooted and found my breast and latched on right away, Her little face was identical to Anberlin, and then by myself, with a garbage can besides me, I birthed the placenta too.
She was there, she was alive, she was absolutely beautiful.
I don't know how many of you believe in being sent signs, but after last night, I believe my daughter is trying to empower me and teach me to trust my instincts again. I believe she's trying to tell me that she will be okay, and I will be okay, and I will have a successful VBAC.