Ultimate Venting Thread

[BearsMummy]

I had an awful weekend!

A couple of weeks ago OH and I went for our blood tests at our GP surgery, the nurse who took the blood tests was based in the room the midwife normally has.

The dirty bint my ex-husband slept with behind. My backhappened to be in the doctors surgery that same day and saw us going in to see the nurse.

I went to a house warming party and the bint was there, absolutely smashed out her tree and in a very loud oxnoxious pissed up manner shouted out in front of the whole place "so your you pregnant then?" I replied very stifley "no" and she was like "but I saw you going in to see the midwife" luckily at that point my bestie come over and escorted me into another room and told the sister of the girl to tell her to shut her big fat mouth!

Bitch!!

 

[trying hard]

agreed. BITCH!!!!

 

[mommy and me]

Stupid Bitch. She must keep her trap shut.

 

[wonderstars]

Holy Bitch! Holy moly! Some people are just ridiculous.

***

Well, one friend popped and now I'm off to visit my best friend who's going to be popping in August. This week is the ultimate test. Today a pregnant woman, Friday visiting my friend's newborn and Sunday, a baby shower.

Someone tell me I'm being stupid. The only reason I think I can do this is because of my fertility appointment. I'd be hiding otherwise.

 

[Maurie]

BearsMummy- Holy Hell that is Awful! I am so sorry...

Wonderstars, WOW I am envious of your strength! I could not handle all of that at this point! Did your fertility appointment go well?

 

[TTCMetalMom]

I can't get away from the pregnant women or new mothers, two of my friends are pregnant, my niece (same age as me) is pregnant and my nephew's girlfriend has just had a baby....and here I am, back on metformin and medication that should hopefully give me a period (not had one in almost 6 months!!) and I feel like crying! I keep wondering if it'd be easier to get hold of a surrogate but we can't afford to do that and I'm still too young to adopt...I hate being in this in between stage! It's not fair! It's really taking it's toll on me, I can't do a day without wanting to cry.

 

[wonderstars]

Metalmom. This stuff really takes a toll. I had to, at one point, take a while off of B&B and Facebook and all my friends. It just got too overwhelming.

Maurie, my appt isn't until July but the thought that I could be pregnant by the end of the year makes me happy. I'll be 32 in October but that's cool. That's still young...right? Haha.

Hope you are all having a good one! Anyone else enjoying a long weekend?

 

[NavyWife84]

I had an awful weekend!

A couple of weeks ago OH and I went for our blood tests at our GP surgery, the nurse who took the blood tests was based in the room the midwife normally has.

The dirty bint my ex-husband slept with behind. My backhappened to be in the doctors surgery that same day and saw us going in to see the nurse.

I went to a house warming party and the bint was there, absolutely smashed out her tree and in a very loud oxnoxious pissed up manner shouted out in front of the whole place "so your you pregnant then?" I replied very stifley "no" and she was like "but I saw you going in to see the midwife" luckily at that point my bestie come over and escorted me into another room and told the sister of the girl to tell her to shut her big fat mouth!

Bitch!!

I agree with the others...what a b*tch!!!
I'm sorry you had a bad weekend. It must be in the air. I had a horrible week last week, but I didn't post it here because it was way too depressing. I did post it in my journal though...I cry when I read it. I hate weeks like that!!!

 

[NavyWife84]

I have just managed to completely enrage myself by checking dates of the next hotel night dh and I have in July. Special occasion as seeing dh face musician, you've guessed it, af is due that bloody day. Last few nights we had away was in April for our 1st wedding anniversary, yep, af was due that day too, time we had away before that was in February for his birthday, yep, af was due that very day too.

So flipping annoyed.

Ugh...that is annoying! Vacations are the ONLY reason I miss BCP! If I didn't want to have af due to a vaca, I didn't have to. Now after being lttc, I would NEVER dream of going back on BCP (unless it is one of those rare occasions that it is medically necessary).

Yeah exactly! I took bcp last year in 2 months b4 wedding as I realised af was due on wedding day & stopped right after honeymoon. Overnights away it's like one thing you tell yourself at least we can just go away for a few days as it's one of the few good points of not having a baby yet!
But it just seems that every single time we try to forget TTC and plan other things the flaming witch is right there reminding me. So every time I go away I'm reminded I'm not pregnant and have to suffer the physical side too. I think there is even a small part of me would go back on bcp just so I can say I'm not pregnant because I'm controlling that choice. You know what I mean?
xxxx

I know exactly what you mean...I told dh the other day that I just can't wait for IVF. Not because I think it is going to work (I am hoping it will, but I don't get my hopes up too high these days), but because we will do the three attempts that insurance will pay for and then we are done. We will be done trying and we will move on to adoption. There will always be a little glimmer of hope that I will miraculously get pregnant and a part of me that is sad about not having a baby of my own, but I will be done with this suffering. I will grieve for a little while that I can't have my own and then I will look forward to inviting a child who needs us into our home because I know we are going to be wonderful parents one day...one way or another.

 

[Maurie]

Stupid little rant...

I am sitting in the hospital supporting my DH. . . His Grandfather is not doing well, they are starting to talk hospice.

when out of nowhere not one but 2 damn lullabies are played over the loud speaker, which means that two babies were just born... I about cried!!!

Why didn't they do that when I miscarried? My baby was born, just far to early to survive....

Unfortunately I was taken off guard, I didn't even think about it when I came to the hospital... Thankfully I am in the waiting room alone working on my computer.... sigh

 

[Armywife84]

Navy- I'm so sorry to read about your ferret. That sounds horrible. Poor dear.

Bears- Your friend should've let you have a go at her!

Mauire- Your right, they should've had a lullaby for your angel and any other angels who have made it to earth for a short stay.

Rant:

I was having to use the loo quite a bit at work today. Well, I'm sick and trying to drink a lot of fluids. One of the girls asks slyly if I had something to announce. I gave her a look and told her, "Uh no. Unfortunately, I'm not able to get pregnant".

 

[uwa_amanda]

Navy- I'm so sorry to read about your ferret. That sounds horrible. Poor dear.

Bears- Your friend should've let you have a go at her!

Mauire- Your right, they should've had a lullaby for your angel and any other angels who have made it to earth for a short stay.

Rant:

I was having to use the loo quite a bit at work today. Well, I'm sick and trying to drink a lot of fluids. One of the girls asks slyly if I had something to announce. I gave her a look and told her, "Uh no. Unfortunately, I'm not able to get pregnant".

Why the hell is it that people automatically assume that since you are drinking more fluids that you have "something to announce"? Did I miss something? Does drinking more fluids make you pregnant? If so...I sure missed out. People just make no freakin' sense to me anymore. Geez!!! What a dumbass...and I bet she sure felt like one after you told her what you did. That is why after what I've been through I won't ask anybody anything because you never know what they could be going through.

 

[wonderstars]

Army - how cruel that you can't even go to the bathroom without having fertility crap thrown in your face. People are just rude. I wish, one day, to have your courage to say I'm not able to get pregnant. Good on you for putting her in her place and making her think twice next next time.

Ya know, drinking lots of fluids could just be a way to get over a hangover? Should try that next time.

Maurie - I can't believe a hospital would do that; I think it's rather inappropriate to actually have lullabies over the intercom. Babies are born there but they can also pass. If I were you, I would actually send in a comment card.

Navy - I'm crossing my fingers for you and hoping things start to go right. This LTTC stuff is so hard and it's difficult to tell anyone about it, which makes it just that much harder.

***

One last shot at this clomid thing. Even DH is ready to go all out. I can't use instead cups because of my high, deviated cervix but I will be using my Divacup to scoop up the spermies and then stand on my head. For some reason from behind has never worked for us (10" height difference maybe?!) but gosh darnit, it's working this time around dammit! I figure we could try and use the stairs?

I'm trying to be more light hearted but damn, it's hard.

 

[Just_married]

Wonderstars you have good attitude to laugh about it.

Me and dh were talking about ltttc the other morning & it got a bit serious, so I made him laugh by getting to eye level with his bits and told them what they needed to do 'we only need ONE of you swimmers, that's not too much to ask is it? Where's your competitive spirit? Which one of you will find the egg first? C'mon guys!'

 

[uwa_amanda]

Wonderstars you have good attitude to laugh about it.

Me and dh were talking about ltttc the other morning & it got a bit serious, so I made him laugh by getting to eye level with his bits and told them what they needed to do 'we only need ONE of you swimmers, that's not too much to ask is it? Where's your competitive spirit? Which one of you will find the egg first? C'mon guys!'

lololol....I've done that too! Evidently though, they must have smirked at me and said, "get real woman"

 

[StephieB]

Another bitter and extremely cynical and sarcastic LTTC-er here looking to join in if possible??

I admit I actually used to be a pretty regular contributor to BnB when I was all positive about TTC, now 2 and a bit years down the line the bitterness of LTTC has slowly turned my soul to stone, and then I avoided this place because, low and behold, it was full of people getting their BFP or pregnant (like it was a huge shock to me, I'm an idiot!) now i feel like making a come back!

My very first rant on here will mirror many of yours!

1) Facebook. Well done to you on the announcement of your fourth pregnancy with yet another man . Bravo slag face!! For my friends with children who have been lucky enough to not be deleted, I do not give two shits how often you have changed a nappy today, or how long your 'angel' let you sleep. You would't care to know how many times my cat shits in a day, and I care even less about your childs bowels!!

2) Marrying into the worlds most fertile family. I kid you not. There have been 4 (yes, 4!) babies born into this family since we were married in October, with another 3 on the way and here I am, barren bloody Betty with nada! One cousin in law got pregnant just so she could have more maternity leave because she was "bored of work". She has a 6 month old, HOW IS THAT FAIR?! Just to top it off, the latest child was born the same week our baby would have been born had we not had a miscarriage. Thanks life, you big twat!

3) LTTTC turning me into a bitter and twisted woman. Seriously, sometimes I don't even like myself! Every time I hear a pregnancy announcement, I just leave. I have left family dinners, christmas parties, meetings at work, I just walk out. Funny thing is we are LTTTC in secret, so I must just seem like a very strange woman. I physically cannot be happy for pregnant people anymore, they should tell you that will happen as soon as you TTC.

4) As I have mentioned we had a miscarriage in September. My first round of Clomid failed miserably, with AF arriving on our DUE DATE!

5) Even now when we are supposedly taking a 'break' from TTC, I still know I'm ovulating tomorrow, I have still lured my unsuspecting DH to bed even though I am actually getting pretty bored of sex, and I will still be heartbroken when AF arrives, only this time, I will have to be heartbroken alone, because I'm supposed to be 'taking a break'.

LTTTC sucks arse. Sorry my rant got a little bit long there! Phew feel better though!

 

[smallstar]

Hey all....i havent been on here for quite some time.....but my best friend has just announced she is pregnant and literally within 3months of coming off the BCP!!!! Makes me feel so angry but bad at the same time for feeling angry!!!
I am in the LTTTC...it will be just over 2 years end of this month Im feeling so low about it all again!!
I never really dont think about it but it seems to be worse when those closest to you are announcing their pregnancies, its like those painful feelings that you try and hide somehwere deep down rise to the surface
x

 

[Armywife84]

Amanda, Wonder- I wouldn't call myself brave, more of tired of putting on a fake, happy show for people. Now, I just let the truth fly and don't give a damn who hears or listens to it. She pretended not to hear and looked down at her work. I knew she heard me too! Oh well, I wasn't looking for pity and glad nothing more came out of her mouth.

Actually, I'm rather surprised she mentioned fertility. I mentioned to another girl I was dealing with IF and I'd figure the rest of the gossipy hens knew already.

Welcome Stephie B and Smallstar!!

Stephie- Sorry to hear of your miscarriage.

I too, don't bother congratulating the pregnant cows when they announce their "happy" news. Sometimes I just stare at them and change the conversation or walk away. I don't want to congratulate them, I want to tell them off!!!


RANT:

"Those days" are now a daily occurrence. So wonderful to feel like garb everyday of my life.

 

[uwa_amanda]

Army, we've done the same. Anybody who asks us when we're having children will get, "It is going to be highly unlikely that we will be able to have children" and leave it at that. Any more than that though, and people's eyes start to glaze over.

 

[Armywife84]

Me and DH just got into it. SIL (I hate) just sent to our new address an invite for the new baby's christening. Plus a family picture and other pics of the new baby.

Not only am I upset about those, but I specifically asked DH to tell the bitch not to send any pictures here, but to DH's parents. It's not that I don't ever want pics of the LOs, I just don't need to see them while I'm going thru IF.

DH is making me out to be this bitch. I can't help the way I feel. I'm just sick and tired of going thru this.

It's upsetting and frightening not knowing if you're ever going to be a mother.