Waiting for AF after M/C, anyone else? OCBM

[crysshae]

Londongirl - I'm so sorry for your previous loss and what you are dealing with now. I too hope in a couple weeks you get a very pleasant surprise.

 

[Lindsay109]

Londongirl, so sorry to hear about your losses Of course you can join, this is a lovely, supportive group. I hope you find it has helpful as I have.

I haven't got many tips for staying positive... but probably what helped me the most was chatting with others who have been through it, and trying to keep busy and focus on other things. Hang in there hun!

 

[Nina83]

Who has mammoth eggs? Blue?

 

[Nina83]

Hi all

Can I join you? I had a MMC at 11 weeks last year, and then got pregnant again (currently supposedly 6 weeks) but I went to A&E yesterday as I had spotting and the scan showed gestational sac and yolk sac but HCG only 700 So I've been told it's not viable and to wait it out. Have a re-scan in two weeks.

I'm trying desperately to stay positive and not start over-catastrophising (eg, not thinking 'it'll never happen' and 'what is wrong with me'!).

Any advice on how to stay positive, and also how to make hcg comd down quickly (!!) would be greatly appreciated!

Hi London,
I'm sorry for your loss

 

[crysshae]

Who has mammoth eggs? Blue?

Yep. It's Blue. Lol!

 

[Lindsay109]

Who has mammoth eggs? Blue?

Yep, lol. Hopefully you have a mammoth egg about to make an appearance too!

 

[Aleeah]

LondonGirl - I'm so sorry you find yourself here. I'm in a similar position at the moment I guess. I had my third miscarriage 3 months ago and then last month tested positive for being pregnant again with no AF inbetween. I've since been crushed, went to my 8 week scan last week and babies (there was 2 surprisingly!) only measured 6 weeks with no heartbeat . I'm due to go back for a scan Friday, as I don't have any miscarriage symptoms yet but I know my dates were accurate so, expecting the worst. I stay positive because of this site (and honestly mainly these ladies!). There's so many women on the website (some of the moderators even) that have had miscarriages in the double figures but they've still come out with many beautiful healthy children.

You'll get there, the pain is bad and sometimes there are dark days but one day you'll have that rainbow and you'll appreciate all it's colours all the more because of these darker days. Sending you some much strength , you'll be in my prayers xxxx

Mrs A - You're very lucky they're doing the fertility testing so quickly. They wouldn't do anything after my last one, and I begged them to do tests on the baby. Apparently you have to have more than 3 miscarriages, as they wouldn't count an earlier 1 as I didn't go into hospital for it ! To be honest I think that was my crappy GP at the time too, it's easier to go through directly from the hospital. My current GP is lovely, and managed to get me into see a fertility specialist in October (earliest they had following my May miscarriage). I'm glad you're seeing someone though, sometimes we need reassurance there isn't something easy they can fix (e.g. low progestrone, or NK cells). I'm sorry your HCG is taking so long to drop, it's a real bummer, I never had mine checked by blood (again they wouldn't check as the sac etc came out intact, so knew there would be nothing left) and I think it took me around 4 weeks to go completely negative (based on pg tests) and then I ovulated 2 weeks after. I know not all women ovulate the first month before AF though.

Bluestars - I love reading up on your TWW, so please keep it coming! Helps to distract me and any distraction is good right now, plus we may be able to help you, it's nearly time to test again...!! I can't wait till you get onto FRER's!

It's so cool you're a nurse!! Congratulations on qualifying too. I've only ever met kind nurses, so you fit the role perfectly. Do you enjoy it?

Crysshae - I actually told hubby when my fertile period was last time and he was far more accomodating even when he was really tired. You both want to have a baby, so it makes sense it'd help him to know when the best time is too. I know some men feel pressured during it but my husband was a 'wham bam thank you mam' type over my ovulation days, his end goal was always get the deed done, get to sleep!!! I always believed babies were made out of love and love making, in our case it's always been speedy love making!!!! The things we talk about...!!!!!

Lindsay - Your job sounds so rewarding, wish I had a job where I actually helped people . I'm the most boring one out of the lot of us it would seem... I'm an accountant! Yep, I sit around and count numbers all day long. However, I missed my calling, as a hairdresser and beautician for sure! I cut men's hair in my spare time (for free!) as well as doing nails for friends and family. I've never had any training but am really good with a pair of scissors, really strange, can't remember how it all started either.

You'd have to teach me the Monkey Bars!! I'm no good physically at ANYTHING!!!

Nina - Hope the infection has cleared up and you're getting in some baby making action? Graphic Designer must mean you're very creative, you children will be very lucky having such a talented mummy!

Literati Love - I don't know what a Technical Writer is but it sounds very clever!! Im glad AF has left you. Will you be temping this cycle? Remember the advice on the preseed, less is definitely more!! Good Luck, keep us posted x

So, I'm feeling better today. I guess no more positive but ready to face things. Yesterday was a hard day, complete meltdown all day (totally unlike me). My poor husband, we both worked from home and he tried his best to mop up all my tears (there were so many, my top is totally ruined, we laughed about that this morning!!). I posted my story on the Recurrent Miscarriage thread too, and they've come up with testing my Progestrone levels next time, in case that's the problem. Who knows?! But at least I'm now trying to think of solutions, rather than dwelling on the problem.

Roll on Friday... I'm ready for whatever you have in store for me!

xxx

 

[crysshae]

Crysshae - I actually told hubby when my fertile period was last time and he was far more accomodating even when he was really tired. You both want to have a baby, so it makes sense it'd help him to know when the best time is too. I know some men feel pressured during it but my husband was a 'wham bam thank you mam' type over my ovulation days, his end goal was always get the deed done, get to sleep!!! I always believed babies were made out of love and love making, in our case it's always been speedy love making!!!! The things we talk about...!!!!!

Lol. DH usually has no issues with love making. He is usually up for it every day unless he's stressed about something, but it never happens every day as life happens or I'm not in the mood and/or being sleepy gets the best of one of us before we can get to bed for the night, and earlier in the day isn't so easy anymore with all the kids. And after 16 years of marriage, me with extra padding, and him being 51, I feel very fortunate that he still thinks I'm sexy enough to grope me all day, and he needs no help in the area a lot of men his age do. It just seems lately his busy or tired days have coincided with my fertile week. So on our date the other night, he asked me if I thought I was pregnant. I told him I didn't think we caught the right time because he was tired that week. That's when he said just tell me when. When I answered that other ladies have talked about their hubby's saying it was too much pressure, he said "It won't bother me. Just say get in here and.... I like it when you boss me around." Yes...the things we talk about. Lol. Oh my goodness.

 

[Mrs A]

Mrs A - You're very lucky they're doing the fertility testing so quickly. They wouldn't do anything after my last one, and I begged them to do tests on the baby. Apparently you have to have more than 3 miscarriages, as they wouldn't count an earlier 1 as I didn't go into hospital for it ! To be honest I think that was my crappy GP at the time too, it's easier to go through directly from the hospital. My current GP is lovely, and managed to get me into see a fertility specialist in October (earliest they had following my May miscarriage). I'm glad you're seeing someone though, sometimes we need reassurance there isn't something easy they can fix (e.g. low progestrone, or NK cells). I'm sorry your HCG is taking so long to drop, it's a real bummer, I never had mine checked by blood (again they wouldn't check as the sac etc came out intact, so knew there would be nothing left) and I think it took me around 4 weeks to go completely negative (based on pg tests) and then I ovulated 2 weeks after. I know not all women ovulate the first month before AF though.

Thanks Hun, I know, it was really nice of him to offer his services.
I'm ready and waiting for Friday with you, and will be here for you no matter what the outcome. X x x x

 

[bluestars]

Aleeah so glad todays less dark! You are allowed meltdowns !! For sure !! Your husband sounds like an amazing guy!! (Tops are cheap to replace... haha).

Well my tww is still a nightmare.... totally ready for more negs as usual. Mammoth eggs I dont think had been caught. I think my hopes are too high ... if that makes sense. Tested again this am ... neg ... down to one last test until I go home on sat. Af due sunday/monday. And wish it would stay away!

London - I found comfort in the support of these women. Helped me through ALOT !!! Cant help with lowering hgc im afraid. xxxx

 

[Lindsay109]

Aleeah, accountants totally help people! I am very grateful for my accountant... I'm self employed and I'm quite sure I could not figure out all the tax stuff on my own, lol. He saves me a lot of frustration

Sorry that you had such a hard day yesterday... you are certainly deserving of a meltdown day, this process is such an emotional roller coaster. And you know, maybe ruining the shirt is a good thing too.... because that means you need to go shopping and shop therapy always helps too

Blue, your chart is still looking amazing! How many dpo are you now? It's probably still a little early.

As for me, I saw the doctor this morning and she was very reassuring which was nice because I'm starting to get really anxious about the ultrasound next week. I am taking tuesday off work, and am trying not to book much for work the rest of the week just in case. Hubby is also taking tuesday off and has let work know he may need the rest of the week... I really hope not. Somehow in the last week or so I seem to have let myself start to get excited and hopeful which just makes me even more worried about the outcome. The doc also gave me a prescription for anti-nausea pills and said I should take them... I'm still kinda on the fence because although the nausea is unpleasant, it does also reassure me a little bit... even though I know the outcome will be the same regardless of whether or not I take the pills.

 

[Literati_Love]

Lindsay - Yep, it's quite tiring! We almost never dtd during the 2ww. I don't really see the point! ahahah.
I am glad your doctor was reassuring. It's a good idea to make sure your schedule isn't too heavy for next week, but of course I truly believe everything will be fine and you will be SO relieved after your scan! It is nice that your hubby is taking the time off for it as well. I can't wait to hear the news! And you're right that the anti-nausea pills definitely wouldn't affect the outcome at all, but I am well acquainted with the somewhat irrational fears/thoughts one can have after a loss. I know I will be *very* relieved if I get sick next pregnancy.

Nina - I do not like seeing all that about saying you're "too dumb" or are too worried about failing and flunking! Never beat yourself up for who you are! Being a graphic designer is a really cool and admirable job and absolutely nothing to feel bad about! Not everyone can be a doctor and there's no reason they should. It is too bad you were too afraid of studying to become a nurse. I know how you feel with being afraid of failure. I am also a major perfectionist!

Londongirl - Welcome here, and I'm very sorry about your losses. Your current situation is about the same way I found out about my MC. Mine was a little more than just spotting, but the scan showed the gestational sac and yolk sac but my hCG was only 580 when I should have been over 6 weeks so that's when I knew it was the end, although they told me I'd have to wait for another scan. I certainly hope your story has a happier ending and that you are just not as far along as you thought. Either way, we'll all be here to support you! I hear you on the catastrophic thinking. I've only had one m/c but still feel like something is terribly wrong with me and it is never going to happen for me.

Aleeah - I'm involved with researching, writing and preparing reports and proposals, and I also edit every publication/manual/report/proposal that goes through the office.
That's good you're going to get your progesterone levels checked. I always feel like my doctor should just test me for that already just to make sure it's not something super simple like that! I will definitely be temping this cycle. I took my first temp of the cycle today! Woohoo. It is actually an odd feeling to be gearing up to ovulate again already because I feel like I *just* ovulated! My last TWW went by really quickly since we weren't trying. This coming one, however, I know will go dreadfully slowly.
I'm very sorry about your meltdown day, but I'm so glad your husband was there to support you through it. I'm also glad you can kind of laugh about it now. I actually had a meltdown last night as well...and it's DEFINITELY understandable in your circumstances (or any of ours)!


Crys - That is very funny! I'm glad your hubby has no problem with dtd and it's great he won't feel pressured to know. I personally put so much pressure on my hubby that I actually SCHEDULE the days and times for us to BD and make him put it in his phone. I find if I don't do that then we just get too busy and we can't make the time. It does pressure him a little (and majorly takes the fun out of it), but so far he has always been able to perform. ahhaa. (Aleeah - I hear you on our babies being made through a very speedy 'get it over with' session! ahah)


Blue - Can I just say that your chart looks AMAZING? I can't believe your temps just keep rising and rising! I know that there's no real way to tell this far along, but I really think you must be PG! I can't wait to hear!

Mrs. A - Glad you're able to get some testing done. Hope that provides some answers.

 

[bluestars]

Heyladies !

O my phone decided to break =no internet...
Not testing today either. Temp wasnt as high today as yest.
I really feel im getting a lot of signs still even woke up tired...
Soppose we will see what happens by monday!!

I think you job is amazing nina! I couldnt do that !!

How is everyone else anyone else in the tww? Xxx

 

[crysshae]

Oh no, Blue! I hope you can get it fixed or replaced very soon. Sounds like your great symptoms keep adding up! I have everything crossed for you!

Lindsay - I'm glad you have a reassuring doctor, and I hope your scan reveals wonderful news that you can be excited about!

Aleeah - How are you doing today?

Nina - Hope that nasty YI is about gone and your BDing is going as planned.

LL and Mrs A - Hope y'all are doing well.

 

[Aleeah]

LondonGirl - Was thinking about you and being only 6 weeks, it's quite normal to only see a gestational sac and yolk (it's good they can see the yolk) and the lower HCG isn't a definite indicator of miscarriage. I've read up a lot on miscarriages recently and the HCG on it's own can not be taken as gospel. Also, the spotting is normal as it can be the release of the implantation bleed, in all my pregnancies I've always had a tiny area of a bleed in the scans and it's true it's the implantation bleed so many women experience earlier but can still very normally happen a little later. 2 weeks is a long time to wait, can you not get an appointment sooner, say after 1 week? I'm still hoping and praying for you .

Crysshae - I wish my hubby wanted it everynight!! Instead I have to think of new and alluring ways to get him to 'put out' as he puts it!! It's so lovely you and hubby still have that spark and yes men loving being bossed around in 1 area only!! Maybe I should be more assertive. Can't fault him so far though, he's kept to his end of the bargain, I just need to get myself sorted.

Mrs A - It's so nice having so many of you for support, thank you . I was wondering, are you still having any pregnancy symptoms at all? Also, are you bleeding or anything? Hoping it's all downwards for you now, and hopefully you'll get a lovely positive BFP again in no time. Do you plan to try again the next cycle, or this?

Lindsay - I don't feel accountants compare to people that save lives etc. I always say to my team, if we don't get it done today, it doesn't matter, it can wait till tomorrow. It's not as if we're doctor's and anyone's actually going to get ill over this..! Though I have seen some directors turn a green colour over the tax returns!!

Please try and not be worried about your scan next week. I think it's lovely you've both got the day off, as it means you can celebrate after the scan no doubt! I know this is it for you and the nausea is such a good sign, I don't think I'd want to take the pills either!!

Literati Love - Your job sounds really busy but very interesting, bet you never have 2 days the same. I like the sound of it, it sounds really cool. I don't know if they will check my progestrone levels but it's certainly something I intend to ask them to check. Who knows if they will or not?!

I'm sorry you had a meltdown too, it's not easy, this having a baby malarky really is a rollercoaster of emotions, so far I've yet to feel the Cloud 9 happy ones but I hope they'll come one day. It's ok to have bad days though, we'll all have that day when that big Rainbow is shining over us! It's good your gearing up for ovulation again, I felt temping helped me to feel like I was doing something everyday at least. This could be your rainbow cycle, exciting !!

Bluestars - Your temp has only moved slightly, it's still really high, please don't be disheartened, this SO feels like your cycle to me . And the signs are such a good thing!! Got everything crossed for you x

Nina - How are you getting on today?

Update from me, my boobs aren't as sore but I still feel a little nausea and that's it. I was tempted to get my doppler out today but I've resisted, I know I won't find anything and I'll know tomorrow anyway, so should just hold out. For now all I can do is hope and pray xx

 

[crysshae]

Praying with you.

 

[bluestars]

Aleeah a dopler wouldnt pick anything up till like 14 weeks! (So I was told) I will be thinking about you the whole day tomorrow!! What times your appointment?

Still have a broken phone!! Im having withdrawal symptoms!! Aaargh I feel like my arms been chopped off. Took a test this morrnining again.... neg... afdue sunday/monday.
Xxxxxx

 

[Literati_Love]

Blue - Your chart still looks great! And all the signs are wonderful. I am *so* excited to hear on Sun or Mon! I really hope it's a BFP! I think you have a really good chance! Sucky about your phone.

Aleeah - Thanks. I ended up having an even *bigger* meltdown last night. Now the added stress of TTC is really getting to me I think. I just want to hurry up and get pregnant and be guaranteed a healthy baby. Wouldn't that be nice? This whole process really is a rollercoaster of emotions. I really never thought trying for a baby would be such a nightmare. I guess my only "cloud 9" moment was when I first saw my positive pregnancy test. That was a pretty magical moment! But ever since then I've been moody and crazy for one reason or another. Oy!

It really sucks you are stuck in limbo land right now. I know it's a hard place to be. You just have to last one more day before you can find out. Hang in there until then! We will be there for you 100%. I'll be praying as well.

How is everyone else doing? I'm curious what CD everyone is on who is trying.

For me, I'm on CD8 already! No fertile signs yet, but I'm sure they'll show up soon. We BDed Tuesday and all things going well we will try to BD tonight as well.

 

[Aleeah]

Bluestars - My appointment isn't until the afternoon, so I'll be posting an update in the evening, sense I won't get any work done tomorrow!! And you're right with a tilted uterus the chances of catching a heartbeat is ridiculously low anyway!! I've never heard or seen a heartbeat in me before though, sadly and that would be my first milestone.

Literati Love - I'm so sorry you had another bad day, try and relax, you're both doing 100% everything you can do, so try and be assured the odds are hugely in your favour. I'm a great believer in the SMEP plan, and you sound like you intend to stick to it. Just hang in there, just a few more weeks. I just know we'll be congratulating you on a BFP in no time!!

You've all been so supportive, thank you all for your kind words. I feel like this isn't just my journey to having a baby, it's our journey. All of us together, we'll get there. We can pick eachother up when we need to but we'll all get there xxxx

 

[Lindsay109]

Thanks for the positive thoughts, I really appreciate it. I am also glad you ladies understand my very irrational thoughts about taking the anti-nausea meds... hubby thinks I'm absolutely crazy (I keep reminding him he knew that when he married me so he's not allowed to complain now, haha)

Aleeah, I'll be thinking of you lots tomorrow! I've still got my fingers crossed for good news. Hang in there!

Blue, your chart is still looking really good, and it sounds like you've got good symptoms too! I'm looking forward to hearing your updates! Hope you get the phone fixed soon!

LL, sorry to hear you've had a bad few days too. It's amazing to me how all consuming this ttc/pregnancy business can be, I really had NO idea. When we started ttc I took a very relaxed approach to everything, but that lasted all of one month... I was much happier that way... wish I could get back to that.

Looks like lots of people are getting close to ovulation! Hope there's lots of BD going on!!

Hope everyone is doing well