Would this really offend you? UPDATED

[taperjeangirl]

I'm stepping away from this thread now.........

 

[catty_smith]

My first was unplanned and I was smoking about 20 a day at the time and had been smoking for about 10 years. I don't know how but fortunately I managed to stop the moment I found out and was ok with it.

I think alot has to do with habbit. I stopped working then because the job I was doing wouldn't have been suitable for me during pregnancy and because the routine changed I managed to break the habbit of smoking at the same time. I'd never tried or intended to give up prior to that.

I think though alot of women find it hard especially if they're surrounded by smokers or still in a similar routine where they're at work and would usually take 5 mins for a fag but instead have to sit and twiddle their thumbs thinking about how much they'd want to smoke!

I think there's a big difference between "giving up" smoking and "stopping" smoking. When you give up it's usually something you think about for ages, you get used to the idea and you become psyched up accordingly.

Alot of women who smoke and fall pregnant unplanned find theirselves in a position where they're expected to suddenly just stop there and then and I think that this can be very difficult because psychologically you're not really prepared for it. Aslo unplanned pregnancies can be a bit of a shock and what's the first thing a smoker does when they're shocked..........?

I think women who smoke in pregnancy need to be given as much support as possible. All women KNOW it isn't particularly good for their baby, but those with the right mental attitude and who are willing to try their best to stop should be helped because they wan't to be helped.

The person that Kimboowee is talking about sounds like she's the sort of person who goes through life with her head up her arse anyway, and there's very little anyone can do to change her.

I wish good luck to anyone who is trying to give up during pregnancy.

 

[rubywoo77]

I've made my point, and obviously I am not articulating it very well - or maybe I'm just in a minority- either way - I stand by everything I say, I refuse to be drawn in by highly emotive language and comparisons to child abuse.

stepping away now.

 

[mumtobe25]

Ok this will im sure make people think im a bad mum etc..but i smoke im 22 weeks preg and smoke..i have told my midwife from the beginning - who told me to cut down and smoke roll ups as this is a bit better (yes not at all better than not smoking) and she would refer me to a stop smoking clinic and cessacetion midwife - neither of which has happened she requested this at my 10 week booking in app but they are far to busy in my area to fit me in...

My baby wasnt planned at all and its only just recently i have started coming round to the idea of having my baby (who by the way at all scans including my 20 week one) is healthy (more than) and is actually measuring on the big side so they have put my dates forward..

im not a bad mum and no it doesnt amount to child abuse as, as unhealthy as it is im not beating my child i have cut down and hope to stop before baby is born..what you said to your friend wasnt out of order or harsh as you were stating a fact and if my baby had come back measuring small i would know it was my fault so her acting this way isnt a refelction on you saying something bad...

the fact she hasnt told her midwife does mean she maybe didnt want to quit whereas i told my mw asked for help (im not a strong person) and unfortunlty i havent managed to get help yet but i have cut down and smoke roll-ups which is what my midwife told me to do yes some people will tell me im abusing my child, im a bad mum etc but im not.im just not a strong person and people can tell me that smoking harms my baby etc but i already know that and as for nicoine replacement my dr wont prescribe them or offer any help with them as he says its just as bad as smoking...i have no will power i have a lot going on since i found out i was preg including a berevment and i havent got strong will power but what i dont get it smoking can cause health issues to an unborn child and yet so can even drinking a glass or two of wine a week and yet no one jumps on the bad parent child abuse theme for them...

 

[xXDonnaXx]

She's thinking of herself.

Personally I think it's cruel - Drinking whilst pregnant. Obviously I don't think anyone should smoke whilst pregnant but the odd few is ok. But smoking more when she's on maternity leave because she'll be ''bored?'' - That's wrong. She needs to start thinking of her baby's health instead of herself.

What will she do if there becomes problems when the baby is here? (hopefully there won't be) But won't she feel guilty then? I know I would.

I would have said something too hun. I couldn't watch someone drink & smoke 20 cigs a day whilst their pregnant.

 

[taperjeangirl]

Ok this will im sure make people think im a bad mum etc..but i smoke im 22 weeks preg and smoke..i have told my midwife from the beginning - who told me to cut down and smoke roll ups as this is a bit better (yes not at all better than not smoking) and she would refer me to a stop smoking clinic and cessacetion midwife - neither of which has happened she requested this at my 10 week booking in app but they are far to busy in my area to fit me in...

My baby wasnt planned at all and its only just recently i have started coming round to the idea of having my baby (who by the way at all scans including my 20 week one) is healthy (more than) and is actually measuring on the big side so they have put my dates forward..

im not a bad mum and no it doesnt amount to child abuse as, as unhealthy as it is im not beating my child i have cut down and hope to stop before baby is born..what you said to your friend wasnt out of order or harsh as you were stating a fact and if my baby had come back measuring small i would know it was my fault so her acting this way isnt a refelction on you saying something bad...

the fact she hasnt told her midwife does mean she maybe didnt want to quit whereas i told my mw asked for help (im not a strong person) and unfortunlty i havent managed to get help yet but i have cut down and smoke roll-ups which is what my midwife told me to do yes some people will tell me im abusing my child, im a bad mum etc but im not.im just not a strong person and people can tell me that smoking harms my baby etc but i already know that and as for nicoine replacement my dr wont prescribe them or offer any help with them as he says its just as bad as smoking...i have no will power i have a lot going on since i found out i was preg including a berevment and i havent got strong will power but what i dont get it smoking can cause health issues to an unborn child and yet so can even drinking a glass or two of wine a week and yet no one jumps on the bad parent child abuse theme for them...

Well done on trying to stop but i am quite shocked that your MW told you to smoke roll ups intead of normal cigarettes.....

Roll ups are stronger and have higher nictoine levels as there is no filter, and if there is one it is nowhere near as usefull as a filtered cigarette.

I sometimes wonder where MW's and HV's get their info.

Yep people do get jumped on for any alcohol intake too, there has been hundreds of debates on this forum involving alcohol during pregnancy and there will be hundreds more to come. Same with any drug taken when carrying a baby.

 

[lucilou]

Personally I wouldn't make someone who is probably already feeling bad - feel worse by having a go at them for smoking. This is the reason why so many women don't admit to smoking to their MW's or continue to smoke in private when pregnant and don't ask for help in quitting. I am by no means condoning it or saying it's ok, but how does being judgemental and/or sanctimonious and preachy help someone???

I totally agree with what you are saying and know it can be really tough to give up smoking, but I think I'd be a bit more sympathetic to this person if she was at least trying to quit....

Anyway, it's her life, I think I'd probably just stay out of it and leave her to it.

 

[mumtobe25]

Well done on trying to stop but i am quite shocked that your MW told you to smoke roll ups intead of normal cigarettes.....

Roll ups are stronger and have higher nictoine levels as there is no filter, and if there is one it is nowhere near as usefull as a filtered cigarette.

I sometimes wonder where MW's and HV's get their info.

Yep people do get jumped on for any alcohol intake too, there has been hundreds of debates on this forum involving alcohol during pregnancy and there will be hundreds more to come. Same with any drug taken when carrying a baby.[/QUOTE]

Sorry i should have said I smoke roll ups with a filter and not just rolled up cardboard sorry should have mentioned that and the reason my mw gave was altho they still have nicotine etc in they dont have near as any amount of chemicals in as normal ciggerettes which is why they go out..i also smoke light tabbaco iam trying but it is very hard to do

 

[NoSpringChick]

I think some people are going off track

it's not about is it right to smoke during pregnancy............. It's about should something have been said to someone who PLANS to smoke more and is drinking even when her baby is measuring small.

If you think yes then it makes no one sanctimonious. It makes someone caring aboiut the unborn child. I'm sure nearly everyone couldnt give a stuff about the mothers health but she is recklessly and deliberatly potentially messing on with her babies health and very survival. There's no excuse not to know the risks these days.

if you think no, nothing to do with anyone else, then fine - this is the way the world has gotton now, people are afraid to say anything that will cause a scene or rock the boat.

 

[pennysbored]

post removed.
I should have read further ahead.