12 dpo and trying to hold out on testing

[Tmav]

I am 12dpo, I tested late yesterday and got a bfn. My last pg I didn't test until 12dpo and got a very faint positive. I didn't want to be disappointed today so I figured I would wait. AF is supposed to come in 2 days. I have been a little crampy the last couple days and this morning I felt it only on my left side. My breasts are a little sore but that could be af. All of a sudden no more cramping this afternoon. Usually 2 days before AF I feel it coming. Any ideas ladies. This is the first tI me posting to one of these forums. I would love to talk to others in the same boat.

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Hiya! I'll wait out it out with you!
I thought AF was due on the 19th but my app thingy has said its due tomorrow.
So who knows! Lol.
I've had a lot of cramping throughout the TWW which isn't normal for me (I usually cramp horribly just before and during, but never a week before like I have this cycle) but I definitely feel like AF isn't far away.

It's still playing on my mind that I could be pregnant though so I'm still waiting to see if AF shows.

 

[Tmav]

Yeah I get pretty bad cramps about 1 or 2 days before. I know most on these forums probably don't want to hear this but with my last I conceived right away. I found out when I was ovulating and went for it, a month before her I did the same but had a mc. But I'm older now. I supposedly ovulated on the third and we had sex on the 2nd so his sperm should have been right there waiting. This will be my last and I just don't want to wait to long. How about you, do you have any little ones

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Yeah I've got twins boys! They'll be two at the end of October.
I'm not actively trying to conceive... I guess we're just taking the natural approach and if it happens, then great, but if not, then that's just the way it is.

It took over 3 years to conceive with my first pregnancy... It was a huge surprise when I got that bfp because I'd just sort of resigned myself to the fact it would never happen.
My boys were born very prematurely, sometimes I think I'm not ready to go through all that again, chances are i'd end up having a difficult pregnancy a second time round, so I'm not 100% sure if I have my heart set on a bfp... If that makes sense?

But I think deep down I'm definitely hoping AF stays away... Hence why I've spent days trawling the internet about my 'symptoms' lol.

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

So sorry to hear of your mc... I can't begin to imagine how hard that would be for any woman.

 

[Tmav]

I actually have had 2 in my life time but they were both pretty early on in the pregnancy. We aren't actively trying g either but I had mentioned toy hubby that I thought I was ovulating and he was still all for being "active" lol. Now I have it in my head and I want it so bad. I got a false positive a few months ago, probably because I looked at it an hour later and it was blue dye. Ever since then I have been thinking about having another non stop. I just want to be able to have another and in the time frame that .y 2 year old and the baby can have each to play with.

 

[Tmav]

I actually have had 2 in my life time but they were both pretty early on in the pregnancy. We aren't actively trying g either but I had mentioned toy hubby that I thought I was ovulating and he was still all for being "active" lol. Now I have it in my head and I want it so bad. I got a false positive a few months ago, probably because I looked at it an hour later and it was blue dye. Ever since then I have been thinking about having another non stop. I just want to be able to have another and in the time frame that .y 2 year old and the baby can have each to play with.

The two year old

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Oh I know what you mean, once you have the thought of getting pregnant in your head, there's no shaking it off.
Any news for you? Any sign of AF?

 

[Tmav]

No af yet. I'm due for it tomorrow but to be honest I have absolutely no symptoms of it. I usually start getting cramps the day before. I took a dollar store test this morning just for the heck of it (which are not very sensitive)
And I swear I saw an extremely faint line but it may be in my head. Only time will tell

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Ooh! Sounds promising! Especially if you aren't having your usual AF symptoms.
Keeping everything crossed for you!

 

[Tmav]

How about you. ..how are you feeling today?

 

[Tmav]

How about you....how are you feeling today

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Pretty much the same tbh! I'm due AF anytime from now, still feels like it's on the way.

Last night I had a tiny pinhead red spot when I wiped after going the toilet.
Part of me is wondering if it could be implantation bleed and the other half of me is telling myself to stop bein so silly lol.
So I'm still non the wiser.
But I'm pretty sure I'm not pregnant

 

[Tmav]

I just started spotting. Ten minutes left to work...I just want to go home. I'm sure I'll get over it but I'm pretty upset right now.

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Ahh no! I'm sorry

Maybe it won't develop to full flow?
I've heard spotting can be a good thing sometimes?

If it is AF I'm really sorry, I know how crushing it can feel

 

[Tmav]

The worse part of it is my husband didn't really want to try but said if it happens he wouldn't be upset. I can't even intentionally try again this cycle. It was more like a coincidence that we had sex at the perfect time. I have to kind of just except it

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Ahh no
Well now you know how much it means to you and how much you want it, maybe have a talk with your husband?
These men folk can surprise us sometimes, he might consider trying again if he knows what it means to you x

 

[Tmav]

Yeah he saw how upset I was last night. He said he didn't realize I wanted it so bad. This is the thing, we just bought a house, I have been working at a small law firm for a year so he's afraid I might lose my job. I don't think so though, my boss loves me. I think I could get him to hire a temp while gone. And lastly....we have 3 children already. I know l am crazy for wanting another, but if I had the money I'd have 10..lol. the first two are much older, 12 and 14 and from a previous relationship. My youngest is 2. I would love to have just one more so she has someone to play with that is her age. My husband is about to be 40 soon. You know it gets harder as they get older. I'm only 33 so I have a while still, but I do t want to keep spreading them out so far. He still didn't actually agree to try but he didn't say no. I should tell him I want to stop taking my birth control. Last month I went off it just to give my body a break.

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

You know, that's part of the reason I wouldn't mind a BFP, my OH is 37 and he said he won't want anymore as soon as he reaches 40.
As it took us over 3 years to get pregnant the 1st time, I don't know if I'll ever be having anymore, ya know?

I'm not using any birth control. I guess we're NTNP and whatever happens, happens.

It's been nearly two years since the birth of my twins and nothing has happened yet lol.

At least he didn't shut down the idea of having more though? You definitely still have hope of having another child.
Sometimes it's best to be blunt with men... They're not so good at reading our minds, as my OH likes to remind me! Lol

 

[AlwaysDreamin]

Also, I know we have financial responsibilities and careers are important... But I don't think anything is as important as having children. That always seems to be a regret of women as they get older, not having more.