30 yo and TTC #1

[Miskas mommy]

Another day, another bfn..... This is downright maddening.
We leave tonite for vacation but I will try to let everyone know if AF show... I'm so sick of this stupid body! Make up ur friggin mind!!

LSD your chart looks great!

 

[curiousowl]

Yay JCM! Glad to hear you can move forward.

ladders, I think it makes complete sense you have some mixed feelings. Hugs. I know you're going to get your rainbow soon.

Ugh, sorry Miskas. That completely sucks!

 

[lsd2721]

ladders, yay for a positive OPK. I know it's a bit upsetting and a bit exciting as well. There are some women who don't ovulate as soon as you have so feel blessed! But it is very reasonable for you to have mixed feelings! Talk them out here! We'll listen! Lots of baby dust to you!

Miskas...booo for bfn! I don't know if I can wait for you to get off vacay to find out! LOL I would say maybe you ovulated later than you thought BUT your chart would not make sense then. You have a clear ovulation day! GL! Have fun on your trip! Hopefully the witch stays away and baby dust sticks!

Dos, haven't heard from you lately! How is the taking a break from the temping going?! Making you feel less stressed I hope! If you are on ladders schedule as well then you'll be ovulating soon so just want to send some baby dust your way!!

I drove down to visit family this weekend and got to watch my niece last night and get to watch her this afternoon/evening! She is going to be spending the night with mom and I'm here at mom's house spending the night as well! I get her all to myself this afternoon though. I would have taken her all day but my sister pays for daycare and wanted her to go in at least for a little bit. SO that is how my weekend is going! Keep my mind off of it for a while, because I'm so freakin excited about my chart. I've been through this once already a couple of charts ago so...don't want to get let down again!

My niece has just started crawling and pulling herself up to stand...so I'll be chasing her around all afternoon!

Hope everyone has a great weekend! I'll be checking in on the evenings!

 

[lsd2721]

Also, to all that use FF, do y'all pay for it or use the free part of it?! I've been paying for it and trying to decide if I renew it this time or just use the free bit. Do you still get to search other charts on the free section?! That's all I really don't want to give up! I'm obsessed with searching for other charts and seeing the percentages!

 

[ladders]

Thanks Lsd, think the worst part it that I use the opks that tell you a few days before actual lh surge so it's giving me time to agonise over it rather than just going for it with thinking too much. Suppose it depends when I get that solid smiley but I am glad my body is getting back to normal.
Was really upset as recently seen father in law whose respond to my miscarriage was he understands I'm probably a bit disappointed! Bit disappointed! Iv not lost a fiver iv lost my baby. Couldn't tell dh as don't want to upset him more so it's been bubbling inside me

 

[lsd2721]

Oh, ladders. That is annoying! My in laws told me better luck next time.....like I failed a test and was going to retake it or something. Not that I lost a baby! I told my husband how upsetting that was and he told me they don't do good in these situations. But it's weird. People by their age should know what to say! I'm sorry!

Try not to think about it too much! I know it's hard though bc now you know it's possible and you've had a small taste of pregnancy, but you'll just love this baby even more! My mom and sister used to tell me to calm down and that would just make me even madder bc they had never been through that before and just didn't know how bad I wanted this baby!

Hugs!!

 

[MrsKChicago]

I'm sorry, ladders. I'm sure they mean well, but how insensitive.

Lsd, how old is your niece? I get in as much nephew time as I can to soothe the baby rabies

 

[curiousowl]

Ugh, I'm starting to have my freak out. I turn 30 on Tuesday. I really think I'd be okay with it if I was pregnant but I'm not and I'm not feeling so hot about my chances anytime soon right this moment. Plus we're new to this area and don't have any family or many friends that I'd want to celebrate with. I think I'm just going to sit home and eat chocolate probably. DH doesn't get it but then he just turned 29 last week so that's not too surprising. Just feeling down about the whole thing

 

[MrsKChicago]

I promise, once you spend a little time being 30 and get used to the idea, it's pretty nice. Way better than my 20s. I hope you find something fun to do.

 

[lsd2721]

Owl, 30 is really wonderful age. I love it. I always thought I'd be really scared of it but I really am enjoying my 30s more. I'm still young but just that good bit wiser!

MrsK, my niece is 9 months going on 10 months. I love spending time with her! She is a sweet heart! I enjoyed taking her around today. We went to Chik-fil-a and everyone kept telling me how cute my daughter was! LOL Just makes me want my baby even more!

 

[DosPinkies]

Sorry I haven't said much lately. I haven't been in the best of places. My head has been really bad lately, my kids at school have gone nuts since we're so close to summer, and I've kind of given up on TTC. I'm still going through most of the motions for now, but I'm close to just not trying anymore. I don't like to share this with people because it's hard - I've only told 2 people total - but besides the slight male factor we've got going on, we also have another problem that prevents us from TTC. Ever since I met my DH it's always been the case that he doesn't always finish...just can't all the time. It's gotten worse and actually it's only happened once in the last 4 months, which was last cycle. I thought that meant it was finally going to be our month, but it didn't. So anyways, we've just had to do like a home insemination type thing every month. It's really hard on us and I think I've just decided that we aren't going to have a baby naturally. After he finally goes in for another SA, I think we'll both go to see my doc again and talk about IUI. I don't really know what else to do.

Anyways, I think I'm just going to take a break from all of us for a while. I can't think about it anymore because it's sending me into a pretty deep depression. Just know that I'll be thinking about you all and sending you good baby vibes.

 

[curiousowl]

Thanks ladies. My friends who are already 30 keep saying the exact same thing. I know I just need a little time to get used to it. I'm feeling a bit better today. Still not excited but I'm trying to look at like it's just the second half of the 25-35 decade which has been (and I hope continues to be!) an amazing decade.

Dos. I'm so, so sorry to hear you're struggling. I'm really glad you decided to share with us though. It sucks, that must be so hard. Has your DH seen someone to determine if it's a physical or mental thing? However it happens I know you're going to get your baby! You deserve it. I completely understand if you need a break though. I'm keeping you in my thoughts.

 

[ladders]

Dos I know how you feel, my dh quite often fails to finish at the crucial times, even If I fail to mention ovulation and keep it to myself it's like somehow he knows and we only have the problem when it's important and it frustrates the life out of me. I really hope you feel better soon and maybe some ntnp will be the answer?!

I'm still on smiley flashing face and managed to get a bd in today even though on nights because was sure would get my surge this afternoon but not even a hint of a line and so felt really peeved off that I forced a bd and it won't help, how horrible is it that I'm thinking it was a waste of time. Just reminds me straight away why I hate ttc.

 

[lsd2721]

Dos, I'm so sorry about what is going on with you! I'm glad you shared and I hope you feel better about everything soon! We're all thinking about you and definitely will be here if you ever want to talk it through! That is what we're here for! You are going to be a great mother one day soon!

Ladders, a bd is a bd. If you are having a smiley face you are in your fertile time and it won't go to waste. Sperm will live up in there for at least five days! Keep on doing what you're doing!

I loved that I said "up in there"....very technical term, right?! hehe ;-)

 

[ladders]

Ha ha I'm the same I'm always thinking about when I'm going to "get one in" around o time lol, caught myself the other day and thought how crude does that sound lol.
Just don't think I'm going to o for a while because test strips look completely white even though I know your not supposed to analyse the lines on the digital. But for you ladies that use opks do you see a gradual darkening of line or is it white and then positive the next time?

 

[lsd2721]

I've used regular opks and the one you're using. I will say the lines looked really lighter on the digital than on the regular ones. So I'd trust the digital. It didn't steer me wrong I don't think!

So I'm over at my mom's house getting really upset and nervous that they put up the dotted lines now. Says they aren't sure so they're second guessing it now. I feel like I'm out. Next cycle I am doing opks again. The monitor I won came in last week so I'm going to read up on it so I can get started with it!

 

[ladders]

Cool thanks Isd, I hate that I'm obsessing about when I will ovulate again especially so soon I really thought I would chill out a bit now because my biggest fear was that we would wasn't able to conceive and now I know we can I thought I'd be more relaxed.
I have ewcm today but still no positive so I'm hoping will get my surge soon.
I don't temp so can't be sure but it really does look like the 16th was your o date so I wouldn't worry too much. You'll have to let us know how you get on with the Monitor because every month I think about buying one and then I wus out because of the money but still really interested in them

 

[lsd2721]

Ladders, hopefully you'll find your zen! Maybe keep up with the acupuncture! Lots of baby dust to you!

I guess all I can do now is sit and wait. This part is going to drive me crazy! I'm impatient!!! I will say on cd16 I did feel a bit of cramping so that could have been ovulation pain? Or it could have been a cyst on my ovaries. So going to try and stop obsessing since there is nothing I can do about it!

 

[curiousowl]

I still say CD16 lsd! I think the dotted lines are from the fertile CM after O and that would be a pretty small spike on CD20. That's super annoying though. I feel your pain. I started my OPKs yesterday (CD7) after the fiasco last cycle. But like you said, you can get 5 days with the little guys so even if it's CD20 you still have a chance!

 

[lsd2721]

Owl, you are so right! I love that you used my own words against me! Lol. But it's true. I'm sorry I'm obsessing so much. Just saw the dotted lines and felt a bit upset! Thanks for calming me down.