30 yo and TTC #1

[ladders]

Okay, kiddos...I'm in full-on TWW sanity-hanging-on-by-a-limb mode. I have refused to voice any of my symptoms aloud because Im scared to death to feel hope. But I figured if I can talk to anybody, I can talk to my forum girls.

I'm 9dpo today, and I am focused on *trying* to wait to test until I'm 14dpo, which is also the day I'm supposed to start (on average). I really do have symptoms, guys...my tatas are CRAZY sore and my areolas are darker than normal (Im a redhead and extremely pale, so I don't have much of an areola...lol...but right now, I actually have them! I cant remember this ever happening.) I'm exhausted for no discernible reason, I've got heartburn, I'm moody. I also have a sore throat. Maybe I'm getting sick? I also linked my chart...is it too early to tell anything? I mean, I know better than to symptom spot (hell, Ive told others not to do it), but I cant help it...i have them and they drive me NUTS. However...everything except for the areolas has happened to me before. OHMYLORD I hate this.

I'm exactly the same dospinkies, 9dpo today and bbs really sore and feel bigger (they are only small so can feel a change) thought my areola looked bigger and darker today that I found myself measuring them and even debated taking a picture so if af comes can compare them during a normal cycle. Panicked that someone could stumble across them on my mobile or dh could see and think i was sending dirty pics to people lol!

Thanks ladies for all the support feel better today but scared to be hopeful, if af comes I vow never to symptom spot again!

 

[curiousowl]

Quick strange question....I thought we took temps first thing in the morning because the temp goes up when you get up and move around. But mine temps go down. Is this odd?

Huh. Yeah, they're definitely supposed to go up. In theory though of course.

My temping confusion for the day is that these past 3 mornings I've realized that I don't actually sleep until my alarm like I thought. DH wakes me up or one of the cats does and then I doze until it's time for me to be up. Who knew? I tested it this morning by temping when I first woke up and then an hour later when my alarm went off. There was a .5 degree difference! That's huge. So I guess the new plan is to set a really early alarm and then go back to sleep. DH's going to be thrilled but oh well. So I tried to mess with my temps to adjust back to how much they went up based on how long I was awake for and then to adjust to the new time I'm going to be temping at. Clearly accurate. So glad I decided to start temping during AF so I could get all this straightened out.

Also, whose temp is 96.3? That's adjusted but still! It was only 96.6 when I took it. I'm pretty sure that's absurdly low. I am always cold though...

 

[PDReggie]

Feel better dospinkies!

Good Luck ladders!

Curiousowl, I am totally also stalking your chart. I do usually wake up when DH alarm goes off but am back asleep within minutes so I am ignoring that one. Maybe that's why my temp goes down when I get up? I took it the other day in the afternoon because I thought I was getting sick and I wasn't sure if I had a fever. It was lower than my morning temp and so I kept doing it and it kept being lower. I think maybe I'm nuts.

So, one of my co-workers told me today that she is pregnant. I'm less conflicted about her than when the lady in our court told me she was pregnant. This co-worker has been trying and doing fertility treatments for close to three years. She knows I'm trying so she was upset telling me. I assured her that I am ecstatic for her. Does anyone else have certain people that they are less jealous or not jealous of but others that they are? Does that even make sense?

 

[fairyy]

I am out. AF is here.

 

[PDReggie]

I am out. AF is here.

That sucks. I'm sorry.

 

[lsd2721]

Dos Pinkies, I am really crossing my fingers for you this cycle! I hope it's your turn for your BFP!

ladders, it's so hard not to symptom spot! I know! This is my third cycle trying and I have vowed the same...no symptom spotting! We can do it! lol We should start a symptom spotters anonymous!

PDreggie, curiousowl, all temping buddies! How do I put my Fertility Friend chart in my signature?! I have been temping and the odd thing is I am on CD8 and all my temps have been the same except two days. They come out at 97.1. I think that's really odd! I will say I haven't been doing it at exactly the same time everyday but trying to keep it between 8-8:30 but my husband does wake up and start chatting to me around 7. Maybe I should start temping then?!

 

[curiousowl]

ladders, DosPinkies good luck to both of you! Don't give up hope until AF shows!

fairyy, so sorry to hear that I hope next cycle will be yours! (And mine! I'm CD3 today so we can be cycle buds.)

lsd2721, go to your fertility friend homepage (fertilityfriend.com/home/whatever) when you're logged in and then click on share in the upper right corner and it'll give you the code to use Can't wait to see your chart. Maybe you're just one of those lucky women who has very clear temps! Give it a cycle and then see. I was doing some more research and it sounds like people seem pretty convinced that doing it the moment you're conscious helps. Having seen my .5 degree increase I think I believe. Maybe you could try that too? Try 1 day at 7am and then another day later like normal.

 

[fairyy]

@curiousowl: Oh you are my cycle buddy then.
Hope this is our cycle.

 

[MgreenM]

I am out. AF is here.

That sucks. I'm sorry.

I'm Sorry fairyy.

I am trying to decide if and when I am going to test. Sunday would be CD28 for me. What do you ladies think? I am more concerned about having to tell my new employer if I am, in fact pregnant...

 

[curiousowl]

Hmmm, it doesn't sound like you're dying to test, right? In that case I'd wait until AF was due. If you are pregnant then you are and hopefully work would just be happy for you! It might not be ideal for them but a good employer shouldn't let that fall on you.

 

[MgreenM]

Hmmm, it doesn't sound like you're dying to test, right? In that case I'd wait until AF was due. If you are pregnant then you are and hopefully work would just be happy for you! It might not be ideal for them but a good employer shouldn't let that fall on you.

The problem is, my cycles have been a little inconsistent lately...so I am not 100% sure when AF is really due this month. And you right, whatever the reality is, is what it is. I do believe everything happens for a reason, even if it is overwhelming at times.

 

[DosPinkies]

Pdreggie - it makes perfect sense. I've been getting pretty pissed as people I've known have gotten pregnant...girls who A. didn't even have to try, B. are not nice people, and C. don't want it. However, I have one friend who is pregnant who is a lovely person and has been trying for 7 years. I couldn't be happier for her. It sounds bad to admit all of that aloud, but it's completely normal I think.

Fairyy - sorry girl :\

Curiousowl - my temps run lower than others...mid 96 is pretty normal for me in the AM. It's not too low. Anything between 96.0 and 98.9 is considered normal.

Thank you everyone for the support. I'm working on hanging in there.

 

[curiousowl]

Curiousowl, I am totally also stalking your chart. I do usually wake up when DH alarm goes off but am back asleep within minutes so I am ignoring that one. Maybe that's why my temp goes down when I get up? I took it the other day in the afternoon because I thought I was getting sick and I wasn't sure if I had a fever. It was lower than my morning temp and so I kept doing it and it kept being lower. I think maybe I'm nuts.

My guess is if you did take your temp first thing when you woke up and then again a half hour later or so it would be higher. I think I read something about afternoon temps being off so I wouldn't worry too much. And I'm sure your DH's alarm wouldn't be a problem if you fall back asleep. I'm only worried because I kind of toss and turn and doze. I think you're doing it right

Curiousowl - my temps run lower than others...mid 96 is pretty normal for me in the AM. It's not too low. Anything between 96.0 and 98.9 is considered normal.

Oh thank you! So glad to hear that! Being the crazy person I am I immediately googled "low BBT" and saw all of these scary things about hypothyroid, etc when I'm pretty sure I'm fine, just have low temps. (And of course I'm basing that off 1 temp that could be weird but I honestly think it's the most accurate of the 3.)

 

[Miskas mommy]

So AF finally shows her ugly face today..... 46 days.. what a she really is.. but that is ok.. now i can actually try and start figuring out my cycle...

and an update on my memier.. she is still hanging in there.. but not much change... she is trying to breath on her own without the vent.. going ok.. but still pretty rough.

 

[SoonToBePreg]

PDReggie, I have a friend who repeatedly told me she DOES NOT want kids. If I ever found out she was pregnant, I'd totally be jealous...
In general, I think it's natural to be happy for those who seem to be fighting for it or wanting it.

Fairyy, Sorry about AF. Maybe next month.

MgreenM, I dunno how u can hold back on testing. I'd totally start doing so. If u can wait...hey, why not! Save the tests and $$ too.

 

[ladders]

Fairyy and miskas mommy sorry to hear the witch has arrived truly gutting I know.

Pdreggie I'm exactly the same three co workers in the last month announced pregnancy one trying for three and a half years i was really pleased for. One for two years i was happy for and one first month younger than me and not so bothered that I just can't bring myself to be happy for. Horrible of me really. The worst was when I had to take dh sperm sample to the fertility clinic as dh has a low sperm count not sure just yet how bad, not only was the centre past the labour part so all massively pregnant woman around which you have to walk past that not bad enough but on the way back walked past a woman massively pregnant in dressing gown clearly about to go into full blown labour chain smoking! Could have run over and kicked her felt so jealous and mad!

 

[MgreenM]

PDReggie, I have a friend who repeatedly told me she DOES NOT want kids. If I ever found out she was pregnant, I'd totally be jealous...
In general, I think it's natural to be happy for those who seem to be fighting for it or wanting it.

Fairyy, Sorry about AF. Maybe next month.

MgreenM, I dunno how u can hold back on testing. I'd totally start doing so. If u can wait...hey, why not! Save the tests and $$ too.

I think I'm not itching to test because if I am pregnant, that means I have to tell my new employer...I would feel absolutely horrible having to do that when I don't even start the job until the end in February. Also, I have had such a rough week that I am just so over tired and stressed that I haven't thought about it a whole lot...

 

[DosPinkies]

MgreenM - it's actually much better when you can hold off, so it's good you're feeling that way. No need to break your heart with a BFN if you don't have to!

Ladders - it looks like we're cycle buddies! Our cycles are even about the same length...mine range between 24-27, but it's most commonly 25. Have you tested at all yet?

Miskasmommy - Sorry about AF, but good attitude! You recently came off the BCP right? That would explain that crazy long cycle. Hopefully it will even out this time.

 

[MgreenM]

That's true. Seeing that BFN is awful! I am thinking I might wait another week. With how stressed I have been this week, that could have an effect on my cycle. In addition, if I do get a BFP, then I can 100% say (even though it is true today) that I really didn't know I was pregnant when I accepted the offer. I did write my resignation letter today and I will be handing it in on Monday. I know I will feel a lot of relief once I do that.

Do you ladies have anything fun planned for the weekend?

 

[SoonToBePreg]

So, my sister just called to tell me she's pregnant. 9 weeks! She was waiting to finish grad school in December, so I guess it happened right away for her...a little early actually. I'm a lil jealous, but really happy for her and for her in laws who have been bugging them for kids.