30 yo and TTC #1

[lsd2721]

RforReal, I'm so sorry!! That has got to be rough! I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

Well y'all, I'm back from my surprise trip to......New York City! We just got back yesterday. My sister in law ( who lives in Australia ) was there as well. Another part of the surprise. We had a blast! What a way to get my mind off of baby making! Although my diet I wanted to do kind of went out the window a bit. I wasn't too bad though...Plus we did lots of walking around the city. I still took my supplements everyday.

Haven't had a chance to catch up yet....I'm still out of town til sunday. I hope everyone is doing great and we get some BFP soon!!

 

[DosPinkies]

R, I am so, so sorry. I can't imagine the pain of that. I'll be thinking about you, and I know that with a little time, the right answer for you and your husband will become clear. Big hugs, sweetie!

 

[DosPinkies]

lsd, I am sooooo jealous! I'm always bugging my husband to take me to NYC. I think the plan is to go for our 5th anniversary. Only 3 years to go! Lol.

So I have a question for you ladies who OPK test. Do you keep testing after a positive until you get a negative? The reason I ask is because Ive always thought that after you ovulate, OPK tests become negative...well I thought I ovulated Wednesday, but I still got a positive on a cheapie strip this morning. Now I'm confused.

 

[MrsKChicago]

Mine was positive for a couple days. It just takes a little time in some women for all the hormones to dissipate. Everything I read said that you'll still ovulate within a day or so of the first positive.

 

[curiousowl]

I agree with MrsK. That's what I heard too.

 

[ladders]

Your chart looks good dos you've got some good timings in.
For some strange reason I've bypassed flashing smilies this cycle and straight to a peak this morning. Took me by surprise! Good job it's the weekend

 

[DosPinkies]

Ladders, yay! We're going to be very close to each other in our cycles again. Don't worry about jumping straight to peak. That happened to me 3-ish cycles ago...just a quick hormone surge I guess. Happy BDing!

 

[Miskas mommy]

LSD so jealous! Love NYC!!

so strange.. I think this cycle is out to get me! more spotting today...

 

[RForReal]

Thanks ladies for your kind words. We aren't giving up, I just feel a bit defeated. It's tougher because we put off getting married and TTC because off grad school and now we have all these loans to pay. Makes it hard to think about shelling out all that cash when we already are to other debt. Ugh. Sorry to be such a downer but I appreciate you all letting me vent. I feel like I can't vent to DH because he feels responsible and I don't want to feed into his guilt. It's our problem to deal with. After we found out, he asked me if I still loved him. Kills me to hear that, of course I do! This just sucks. Doesn't change how I feel about him at all.

I'm still rooting for you all and hope that all of your journeys will be a heck of lot smoother than mine has been!

 

[ladders]

Must be horrible for your dh because he knows how much you want a baby and will wrongly feel responsible but that's what we are here for so you can vent and breakdown with us and then be strong for dh. Have you discussed the use of doner sperm? I know that it wouldn't be ideal and you want dh to biologically be father but would reduce costs and increase chance and ultimately it's always going to be yours and his whatever the genetic makeup. Also in the UK we have egg sharing programmes so if you need ivf and not because of low eggs yourself you donate some eggs to another couple and then they pay a good chunk of your treatment. Takes an average ivf cycle from 4000 to 2000, didn't know if you guys had the same?

 

[RForReal]

Must be horrible for your dh because he knows how much you want a baby and will wrongly feel responsible but that's what we are here for so you can vent and breakdown with us and then be strong for dh. Have you discussed the use of doner sperm? I know that it wouldn't be ideal and you want dh to biologically be father but would reduce costs and increase chance and ultimately it's always going to be yours and his whatever the genetic makeup. Also in the UK we have egg sharing programmes so if you need ivf and not because of low eggs yourself you donate some eggs to another couple and then they pay a good chunk of your treatment. Takes an average ivf cycle from 4000 to 2000, didn't know if you guys had the same?

We've discussed donor sperm and my DH really wants a baby so he is open to the option which is great. I'm open to it too if it gets us a baby faster. I think we could do IUI with donor sperm which would be much cheaper than IVF. But first steps, I think we are going to talk to the doctor about what they think the total cost would be for us to do the genetic testing with IVF to see if we can afford it. I'm starting a new job Monday so we will have to wait to start the process anyway. Thankfully our new insurance under my new job pays 80% of IVF after our deductible is met so we won't be paying the full cost for that. But genetic testing isn't covered I don't think. I'm not sure about the egg sharing thing, I hadn't heard that. I'd have to look into it and talk to DH to see how he would feel about it, thanks!

 

[MrsKChicago]

R, I'm so glad you guys are looking at solutions and that your husband is open to donor sperm. I'm sure it's not easy for him (or you, but you probably don't feel like it threatens your manhood, you know?). I hope your doctor has some good news, as far as costs go.

 

[MrsKChicago]

I think I'm probably out this month. Tiny bit of spotting, AF could come any second now. Not completely giving up hope, but I'm guessing this is it.

I'm resisting the urge to just say "to hell with plans!" and keep trying. We were going to take April and May off for a few reasons. 1) Christmas baby. 2) I'm going out of town in mid-May, for a girls weekend, and there's NO WAY to get away with not drinking without spilling the beans if I'm pregnant, and do I want to do that at 7 weeks? 3) Do I want to do all that traveling at 7 weeks? Or during the 2ww? There's a lot of travel in May! 4) Between Tax Day and a Big Annual Event on the weekend of April 12-13, I really highly doubt either of us will have the time or energy to even think about doing the deed. I think I need to talk some sense into myself. I've made it this far, I can make it 2 months. And for those 2 months, I get to take my melatonin and the kava blend I've been missing...

 

[ladders]

Mrsk I think you have solid reasons for taking a couple of months out, will you be actively stopping it or ntnp? I'm way too far on the crazy train to stop I thought before that I wouldn't want an Xmas baby and really wanted a girl. Now I don't care when it comes or what it is I just want it!
So I went to acupuncture on Thursday and chilled me right out, got my solid smiley early on Friday and set about trying to bd as much as possible. Dh thinks ovulation weds but is today and so has decided that acupuncture makes me horny. Ha ha I'm happy to let him think that because has really taken the pressure off

 

[MrsKChicago]

Haha! Glad the acupuncture helped!

I guess technically we'd be NTNP, but I can tell you from experience that the odds of sex any time even near ovulation in April without making a conscious effort are about nil. And depending how my dates go, we may not even be in the same state for May ovulation.

If we're still trying in a year, I'm sure avoiding a Christmas baby will cease to matter. Considering that my mom is early December, I'm mid December, and my brother is mid January, we're already pretty full up on Christmas season birthdays

 

[DosPinkies]

R, I'm glad your DH is open for different options. IUI I'm sure would be so much cheaper - and hey, you could even do at-home insemination for an even cheaper option. I'm sure everything will work out for you guys.

Sorry about the spotting, MrsK, but I will still hold out hope for you!

I got crosshairs today! Yay! I love crosshairs...they make me happy.

 

[Miskas mommy]

ok so i am going out of my mind... 5 dpo now and spotting again today.
I have never in 15 years have spotted between cycles! stupid body is driving me nuts!

 

[MrsKChicago]

Bodies are assholes.

 

[MrsKChicago]

I'm out this month. DH, who's definitely more nervous and unsure about this whole thing than I am, surprised me by suggesting we just keep going, and who cares if the baby is born on Christmas. Spoken like someone born in June Maybe I'll poll the first trimester ladies about travel at 7 weeks.

 

[ladders]

I'm sorry mrsk first day of af really really sucks, hope your okay. I'd keep trying because it seems to happen when it's not convenient, might be Your lucky month because of it!