38 and TTC first baby, anyone else?

[Mdc]

Ellie, love the bbs! How are you feeling?

Wish, how are you holding up? I am hoping you start getting some good symptoms soon!

Ayala, that sounds like a great plan! These next months will fly by because you are going to be so busy concentrating on savings and weight loss. Best of luck!

Hi to everyone else.

I just took my last dose of progesterone I think AF is ready to show very soon because I had a spot yesterday. I may or may not have added a prometrium dose to keep her away till at least tomorrow. I know...bad patient. I am supposed to go to wine country and then camping with the in laws starting the 14th and I would like to make sure we don't need to cancel if I have an early O. With everything going on we have done nothing for ourselves lately tripwise. Memorial Day was IVF and we did not plan anything last weekend bc we thought I would be transferring or post transfer. We usually do at least one huge vacation a year, but haven't been able to do so because all the TTC crap. I just want to get preggo, DH wants it probably more, so we are willing to do what we need to. Just hope our time is sooner rather than later. I did always say that the more we f'd with my cycles the further we have got away from a BFP, so with a natural cycle I hope my instincts are correct.

 

[elliecain]

Mdc, it is so far past being your turn that I will start to get very cross if this doesn't pan out soon. I want you PUPO ASAP!

Wish, any juicy symptoms?

Chipie... 4 days until your wedding!!!

Afm, well, I'm now 5dp2dt (7dpo) and determined not to start even thinking about testing. I went back to work today and it was easy because some colleagues were striking so no kids in school! I got loads done. I did notice a bloated and a bit cramps feeling on and off today, but it's probably wishful thinking because I know implantation happens from today...

I'm still temping but I guess there won't be a dip because of the cyclogest. Oh the cyclogest, little pessaries invented by a man. Without doubt. No woman would dream up something like that. I feel like I've spent the past 5 weeks just poking things into every orifice (nose, mouth and now foo foo...) Not forgetting all the injections! I don't really mind THAT much, but it sure is a process!

Anyway, I've just done a load of gardening while DH painted the fence. I cut back so much hedge.

It's great that it actually felt like July weather today!

 

[Wish2BMom]

ellie - I had lost track of where you were (I was going to look it up) so thank you for reminding me! yes, I was all zen the first week of the TWW but the 2nd week, I become psycho. I hope you can hold your zen longer!

mdc - I echo what ellie said - you are SO overdue. I can't wait until you're PUPO! wine country and camping sounds divine. I'm glad you're making some plans for yourself. I'm pretty convinced that sitting around trying to be as still as possible and wait isn't always in our best interest either.

aayla - sounds like a great plan! you seem a bit analytical by nature, eh? haha Sounds like you have the drive and determination to get it done!

afm - no really juicy symptoms, unfortunately. Some bottomless pit hunger, really thirsty (but it's been in the 90s here...), some indigestion/heartburn, and slight cramping/lightheadness but nothing crazy strong. Boobs are sore in the same spot they were last month. Again, nothing crazy. Today is 11dpo, which is typical AF day, so the crinone is working. My cervix seemed pretty high and soft today, though. Not putting my money on that one, though. Sigh...

 

[Aayla]

ellie - I had lost track of where you were (I was going to look it up) so thank you for reminding me! yes, I was all zen the first week of the TWW but the 2nd week, I become psycho. I hope you can hold your zen longer!

mdc - I echo what ellie said - you are SO overdue. I can't wait until you're PUPO! wine country and camping sounds divine. I'm glad you're making some plans for yourself. I'm pretty convinced that sitting around trying to be as still as possible and wait isn't always in our best interest either.

aayla - sounds like a great plan! you seem a bit analytical by nature, eh? haha Sounds like you have the drive and determination to get it done!

afm - no really juicy symptoms, unfortunately. Some bottomless pit hunger, really thirsty (but it's been in the 90s here...), some indigestion/heartburn, and slight cramping/lightheadness but nothing crazy strong. Boobs are sore in the same spot they were last month. Again, nothing crazy. Today is 11dpo, which is typical AF day, so the crinone is working. My cervix seemed pretty high and soft today, though. Not putting my money on that one, though. Sigh...

nailed it on the head. I am so analytical. I love figuring stuff out and numbers and spreadsheets. Even if I never get stuff done I have lists and lists galore. Lol now if I can just get hubby on board with the money. Reigning him in is hard. He grew up with so little that he has a hard time not spending it on things he wants. And sometimes it is just laziness, like buying subway on his way home instead of making something at home.

 

[Wish2BMom]

I understand - I have a bit of that 'money burns a hole in my pocket' syndrome too! Thankfully DH is really good at saving.

So I'm pretty sure I'm out - I couldn't feel more normal right now. Oh well. I did bring up to DH that I wanted to rethink DE - he's totally up for discussing and though it's a large sum of money, it can still be the fraction of the cost of an adoption and I'd get to experience pregnancy. And I think it can be financed, which would be good for us. So I think I really want to go that route now. Maybe sometime in the future, if and when we have our own, we can look into foster-to-adoption. That will give us both the experiences we desire and I think it would be in the proper order - a newborn of our own and giving a loving home to an adopted child of an older age. We'll see - this is my pie in the sky idea right now. We might be too old in a few years to think of bringing in another child (if we can get the first one from DE) but I'd rather wait until we have some child rearing experience under our belts before bringing in another child who will most likely be older and have some not-so-great history that we would need to contend with. I'm totally open to it, I just don't think it would be smart for us to start with that. Especially since neither of us have anything similar to those experiences to pull from either, nor child-raising experience!

ellie - how are you feeling? I don't want to prod you into symptom-spotting...

mdc - do we have full AF now so we can look forward to Napa AND a transfer...?

 

[Mdc]

Wish, darn feeling normal. I was hoping pukey and fat for you...nice friend huh? I am still holding out for you though. I think de is a splendid idea for you and if it comes to that I will be your loudest cheerleader.

Hope everyone else is doing well!

AF has decided to be a bit dodgy and no sign of her yet this morning. Usually it takes 4 days to show so we will see. Of course a new client in SoCal want to do an onsite meet up and it is hard to know when will work out until the witch gets here. Ahhh...so complicated.

 

[elliecain]

Damnit Wish, but I'm still hopeful for a ninja stealthy one.

Mdc, I hope it gets going soon!

Well, I've had some sharp tickling feelings this afternoon, slightly off centre behind my tummy button. It's been on and off for a few hours. Probably not related and just another cyclogest side effect, but thought I'd feed the crazy in me by acknowledging it here!

I got all creative at school today and made a chalkboard and a card. Obviously, I added bees... I'm quite pleased with them! Might save the card to give to DH if we have good news next week.
https://i65.tinypic.com/rigt1h.jpg

 

[Wish2BMom]

haha thanks, mdc!! I was hoping for pukey and fat too but alas, no dice. I am still starving at the drop of a hat, though, but we all know impending AF witchy witch can do such things. I hope yours comes soon, or whenever you want her to come!

ellie - those are so cute!! I think that's such a cute idea to give to DH if you get good news. And pothole would love your card!!

 

[elliecain]

I've just been told about an Instagram account (called IVF Explained) run by an embryologist.
It's incredible! The latest posts are mainly interpretations of readers' blast pictures, but older posts talk about every issue related to fertility and IVF. I posted a couple of questions and they answered me in minutes. They have a FB page too, but I find Insta more anonymous.

Insta: @ivf_explained
FaceBook page.

 

[Dandi]

Thanks for sharing Ellile. The post about AMH is very interesting. I want to get mine retested soon after this pregnancy and see if it's still so low. I've never read about anemia and vitamin D deficiency playing a role. I've been diagnosed with anemia so many times in my life, it's an interesting piece to the puzzle. And reading that one woman can only receive ivf funding with donor eggs because her AMH is a 3 makes me realize even more how miraculous my pregnancy is at .6! The human body is such a mystery... Also, your crafts are adorable!

Wish- still holding out hope. No symptoms doesn't really mean much, so there's still a chance, especially with that cramping that you had. Friday is test day right?

Mdc- I hope AF cooperates and comes when she should!

 

[Wish2BMom]

thank you! I have a sliver of hope but really just preparing to have a FUN weekend at the casino with the ladies.

ohh, i'll have to read up. I don't have instagram (I don't get it...) but I can poke around on FB and just not post anything!

oh and yes, test is 7:35am on Friday.

 

[Left wonderin]

Wish with both Anna and Sean I had zero symptoms until about 6 weeks . Nothing . So your definetly not out yet

 

[Wish2BMom]

thanks, left! I want to BELIEEEEVE!

so I actually am back on the Maybe Train. I've been wide awake every night around 2am for the past week for at least an hour. My cat has a hand in waking me up but I cannot get back to sleep within an hour or two for the life of me. I remember this happening last BFP. During that time last night, I had some solid cramping. I'm still having a little bit and I don't cramp before AF gets here, ever. But the biggest maybe is that my insides are soft, squishy and my cervix is very high. I also tried to see if it was open or closed yesterday and this is the first time I didn't feel an indent, so I assume it's closed? typically before AF, I can tell it's AF-time.

i'm of half a mind to go out and get a test today but I'm so sick of wasting $20 on negatives.

 

[Mdc]

Wish, that seems like a wonderful start and I am not sure if I could hold out on testing! Are you still on Crinone? Think I remembered you were maybe stopping. Either way it sure sound super positive!

 

[Wish2BMom]

yep, kept with the Crinone. What's 3 more just in case?

 

[Aayla]

Sorry to post and run but I have to start work in 10 min and I just wanted to give a quick update.

Went to see the fertility doc today. He wants to do letrozole and IUI. I'm only allowed 3 more cycles of letrozole and because of my weight IVF is a way off and he doesn't want me losing drastically which can do more harm than good in the neonatal sense. So while I lose weight and save what we can we will do three rounds of IUI. (assuming we need 3). He says it will double our chances.

Since I am cd 6 today this cycle is out. so I just have to wait for the next af. The IUI should happen around Aug 24 depending on when af comes. Without being on letrozole af doesn't like to behave normally so she may have to be induced.

DH and i have to get new blood panels done of all the std's and stuff as it has been a few years so having to wait makes sure we can get them done and they get the results in time.

The doc was really excited he was like "yeah..let's do this..Let's just do it." This is why I chose this doc. he is so passionate about it.

 

[elliecain]

Your doctor sounds great!
I am glad you have got some next steps sorted out - makes things much less stressful when you know where to go next.
Thanks for the IG add, by the way

 

[Wish2BMom]

that's awesome, aayla! I like his style!

 

[Aayla]

He is great. I had 2 other doctors before him at this clinic. The first went back to her home country to help women there and the other I had for awhile. I got this new doc for one visit early 2015 when my regular doc was on maternity leave (oh the irony and she did a wonderful job of hiding her pregnancy) but then she was suddenly not working at the clinic anymore. Not sure if she quit or was fired. But they asked if I wanted another female doctor and I said no I want This doc. He put me on letrozole with no real concern with my weight. and he would do IVF in a heartbeat at my size if the BC College of Surgeons allowed it (they are the ones who restrict IVF to a bmi of 38).

I'm so happy. since he will do 3 more rounds of letrozole max he said we might as well do IUI first as it doubles our chances. Then if that doesn't work then we move on to IVF. but while I do these cycles I am to really focus on losing weight and prepare for IVf.

 

[Wish2BMom]

So it's a negative. I haven't gotten the official call yet but I did 2 tests, last night and this morning and both were stark white. I'm so over that color. I started spotting last night too and more this morning, so I'm making the call! It's ok, though - I'm glad we have DE in the future. And I get to have a fun weekend with the ladies at the casino.

next up - Dandi with her delivery and ellie with her BFP!!!