40+ and Trying for 1st? Join in!!

[Kat S]

Briss, I'm sorry I didn't know it was seen again and again. Not knowing your detailed history caused me to say something that was obviously wrong. Sorry about that.

 

[Briss]

Kat, no worries, thank you for looking into that and trying to help, I am used to functional cysts that come and go and never mind them but this one is something I do not know how to deal with and not sure what impact it may have. my FS was not worried but I can see that cyst may even stop you from having a fertility treatment so am getting slightly worried

 

[bash73]

Finally some answers...Met w/new doc, what a wonderful man!!!!!! Thank God, I found him. He agreed w/the idiot doc that it was one pregnancy. Seeing as nothing was in my uterus he agreed "ectopic" but not in my tube. New doc, can I call him "Mr. Wonderful"?, found a mass near my right ovary. He's not sure exactly what it is, however, he said it could be residual or persistant tissue from the ectopic. And He found the mass, not the ultrasound tech. I'm probably the only person to ever be happy to hear that a mass was found inside of them. Now I have to see his son tomorrow (mr wonderful only handles OB patients doesn't do gyn surgery). He's not positive that I will need surgery but his son would do it if I do. He was soooo positive. He kept saying you're 39 years young. When you get pregnant I will probably change your blood pressure medication. He is sending me for a bunch of blood work to check DNA, antibody's, etc. Hoping I can start trying by the time I'm 40 (47 days to go).

 

[Kat S]

Bash, that is GREAT news! It's so relieving to finally get some answers and see things moving forward, isn't it? Fingers crossed they get a good plan in place for you!

 

[Juniperjules]

Ahhhh... Am feeling those unmistakable lower abdo cramps of AF coming. Looks like another month bites the dust for me!

 

[Emmi]

Finally some answers...Met w/new doc, what a wonderful man!!!!!! Thank God, I found him. He agreed w/the idiot doc that it was one pregnancy. Seeing as nothing was in my uterus he agreed "ectopic" but not in my tube. New doc, can I call him "Mr. Wonderful"?, found a mass near my right ovary. He's not sure exactly what it is, however, he said it could be residual or persistant tissue from the ectopic. And He found the mass, not the ultrasound tech. I'm probably the only person to ever be happy to hear that a mass was found inside of them. Now I have to see his son tomorrow (mr wonderful only handles OB patients doesn't do gyn surgery). He's not positive that I will need surgery but his son would do it if I do. He was soooo positive. He kept saying you're 39 years young. When you get pregnant I will probably change your blood pressure medication. He is sending me for a bunch of blood work to check DNA, antibody's, etc. Hoping I can start trying by the time I'm 40 (47 days to go).

That's sounding so positive and I can feel your relief! Lets hope that things now start moving in the right direction!!! And yes - we are still young indeed!!!

 

[Emmi]

Ahhhh... Am feeling those unmistakable lower abdo cramps of AF coming. Looks like another month bites the dust for me!

Me too.......It means that I can book my pre test scan for eventual IVF but I had been thinking what a wonderful irony it would be if I got pregnant now.....And it would save us a lot of money.....Ho hum....

 

[Juniperjules]

Me too Emmi..I just had my FS appt moved forward a month to 9th aug. which is great- this new FS has about a 2.5 month wait list so seeing her a month sooner is fab. But I was hoping it would be an ironic coincidence if after getting the new appt I ended up pregnant. No such luck.

I'm not gonna slip into negativity.. But on a day like today I really cannot envisage EVER being pregnant. Do u guys feel like that??? That ur body for no particular reason just will never be pregnant?? It's irrational I know (well apart from the obvious age issues), but I just can't see it happening. It seems like TOO much of a miracle. Infact, I can't believe ANYONE gets pregnant.. Ah, onto August!

 

[Emmi]

I totally know how you feel Juniper - why can something so natural be so difficult! I am totally thrilled for William and Kate but it totally brings home that my fairy tale ending hasn't happened.
But I am trying positive thinking - the universe put me on this earth to be a mother and I just have to wait until the time is right. Getting depressed hasn't helped at all so I have to say to myself that my time will come.

One day at a time and then focus on August.....I am so excited about IVF but at the same time - there are so many nagging anxieties that it won't work. But I have to concentrate on the present for now.

 

[bash73]

Positive vibes ladies...it will happen when the time is right!!!

 

[Emmi]

Positive vibes ladies...it will happen when the time is right!!!

 

[Kat S]

I was reading an article about pregnant 46 year old Halle Berry and how she claims it was 100% natural and a surprise - no fertility help. The author of the article was saying it was unlikely she conceived naturally and was doing a disservice to older women seeking pregnancy by making it look easy to get pregnant at that age. The comments from readers floored me. So many people commented that either they or a relative/friend of theirs had a baby at 42..43..44..and 45 completely by accident. Made me feel hopeful. Is it not as unlikely as I think or did the 10 people who got lucky happen to read that article and comment?

 

[Emmi]

I was reading an article about pregnant 46 year old Halle Berry and how she claims it was 100% natural and a surprise - no fertility help. The author of the article was saying it was unlikely she conceived naturally and was doing a disservice to older women seeking pregnancy by making it look easy to get pregnant at that age. The comments from readers floored me. So many people commented that either they or a relative/friend of theirs had a baby at 42..43..44..and 45 completely by accident. Made me feel hopeful. Is it not as unlikely as I think or did the 10 people who got lucky happen to read that article and comment?

Fertility is not black and white - doctors say to women all the time that they will never have children and then all of a sudden - the unexpected happens! A lovely friend of mine spent 10 years trying to conceive and the doctors told then there was nothing wrong them. And then on a holiday - boom - she caught. Another friend of mine has just had a baby at 43 - her 1st one. No IVF or anything - just nature at it's best.

I was talking to a friend yesterday and I was expressing how scared I was I was that only 25% of women at my age go pregnant at my clinic at 42. He said that statistics are just numbers that can be changed in a second! That made me think - numbers are just numbers that can change as fertility can change at any moment!

Hope those ramblings make sense!!! x

 

[Pescadita]

Hello girls,
Hope it's not too late to join in the club.
I've read all the post here and I'm glad to see a group of women who are supporting each other through this rollercoaster of hormones, meds and procedures.

A little about myself:
Age 40 (41 in Sept)
2 miscarriages last week at 5 weeks
2 failed IUI's this Spring (1 failed and 1 canceled - body did not repsond to meds)
1 canceled IVF just last week (7/19) due to body not responding to meds.

We have a consultation next week to see what next steps are. My mind is racing a 100 MPH, thinking too much, giving myself headaches cause all we want are answers.
So what happens when your body does not respond to hormone meds? Are there another group of meds that I'll be one or do I need to see a hormone specialist?

Reading sucess stories are promising and hearing about some girls try different things are also encouraging.

 

[Kat S]

Pescadita, welcome! Sorry we are all meeting under these circumstances, eh?

I'm so sorry for your losses! And you are not responding to meds? Are you not ovulating or are your follicles not growing big? Either way, I hope your FS can find the right solution for you. It might be other meds or donor eggs...but whatever path you end up on, we'll be here cheering you on!

 

[Emmi]

Hi Pescadita - sorry to hear that you have been through so much - all so very unfair.

But welcome - always a listening ear and someone to talk to.

 

[Briss]

there is an interesting phenomenon which I think accounts for a lot of pregnancies after 45. when your body starts moving towards menopause your FSH goes up but interestingly just before you enter menopausal state your FSH suddenly goes down and you start releasing more than one egg each cycle. it does not last very long but women seem to be very fertile for one last time just before they hit menopause and some get BFPs. now obviously some of these pregnancies end up in m/c due to poor egg quality but some get lucky.

Pescadita, when your body does not respond to meds you can always try natural cycle IVF (without meds). That's what I decided to opt for because with high FSH I was told I wont respond well to stimulation so no point doing meds

 

[Pescadita]

Thank you girls!!

Interesting point Briss!! I'll have to talk to my doc about it and see what they suggest.
My 1st try was with Clomid for 5 days, had only 2 follies but lining was too thin. We tried anyhow but nothing happened. Which then brought us to 2nd try of IUI with Ferma (I think that's what it's called), no follies but lining was perfect. Took the meds for 5 days. Doctor canceled it seeing that I didn't show any follies after 16 days of testing to see if I ovulated. But for some reason on day 24 doctors tested my blood and it showed that I ovulated but we all missed it. Got my cycle on day 42. (hope that makes sense)
After seeing these numbers and learning more about my hormone levels, I guess my miscarriages could be due to poor egg quality. It's crazy how our body works, even with meds.

I'm glad I found this board. Experience and useful information that are shared ease my mind that we all have to stay positive and open minded. Our body is fertile, it's just a matter of time.

 

[Juniperjules]

One of my mums best friends had her 3rd son at 44. He wasn't planned, she thought she was going through menopause infact. And was 6mths pregnant & DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT!! she felt like a fool bcos 1. She'd been pregnant twice before, & 2. She's a nurse!!! Which makes u look stupid when u say u didn't know u were up the duff! : ) but her pregnancies were always very easy, straightforward, no issues, & her babies teeny little things... She was carrying a bit of extra weight at the time & didn't notice any huge changes in her body...

Women are definitely still getting pregnant well into their 40's. one of my friends had her first at 40 & second at 42. The head of radiology who did my HSG a few weeks back told me she had her first at 40, then twins at 43 (IVF).... Plus, in our grandparents generation, women were popping out babies in their 40's all the time. it was very common bcos they didnt use contraceptives. It def is possible!

 

[Emmi]

One of my mums best friends had her 3rd son at 44. He wasn't planned, she thought she was going through menopause infact. And was 6mths pregnant & DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT!! she felt like a fool bcos 1. She'd been pregnant twice before, & 2. She's a nurse!!! Which makes u look stupid when u say u didn't know u were up the duff! : ) but her pregnancies were always very easy, straightforward, no issues, & her babies teeny little things... She was carrying a bit of extra weight at the time & didn't notice any huge changes in her body...

Women are definitely still getting pregnant well into their 40's. one of my friends had her first at 40 & second at 42. The head of radiology who did my HSG a few weeks back told me she had her first at 40, then twins at 43 (IVF).... Plus, in our grandparents generation, women were popping out babies in their 40's all the time. it was very common bcos they didnt use contraceptives. It def is possible!

Amen to all of the above!!!!