40+ and Trying for 1st? Join in!!

[Jean40]

No beta unless I get a positive home test first. I do get my progesterone tested on Monday (none of the places to get blood drawn for my hospital are open on Sunday, of course). I still got the trigger shot in my system. Here's hoping for the line to start getting darker next week.

 

[Vonn]

Pussycat--no apologies! You are not too gushy. After so many disappointments and such sad family news, you have every right to be excited about your bfp. And we are all so thrilled for you, it is truly wonderful! Do you go in for a blood test? Can't wait to hear more...and also, I'm so curious about whether there is one or two little beans snuggling in!

Pearl--We are happy to have you join us here! I lurked for a while before jumping in, too. You've had a rough road, I hope your bfp will be here soon, or is it already? Under your name it says you are pregnant, is that true? Have you had a donor egg cycle yet? Lots of questions!

Clizzard--hi!

Weezy--so good to hear from you! Give us an update on how you are doing next time. I'm curious about where you are at?

Jean--the nausea sounds yucky but promising.

Terri--do you have a plan in place for your next try? I know you want to try IVF again. Will you be doing it asap or is it advised to wait a couple cycles after a mc? Thanks for asking about me!

myonechance--how are you?

AFM--I got a whole lot of nothing going on right now, in terms of symptoms, except for sore bbs, but that happens every month. I have a week and half to go, so not really expecting much yet.

Not sure if I'm bloated from meds or just getting fat because I cannot stop myself with the sugar consumption. I'm not supposed to be eating sugar at all to get rid of the candida but I fell off the wagon and have been eating horrendously. Every day I say I'll start being good, but then something (anything) happens to throw me off and it's off to the races. I have a terrible sugar addiction, and of course the candida creates the craving. I don't know how to stop. Even when I tell myself it will help me be healthier to get pregnant, I still can't stick to it. If I can't be motivated by the prospect of a baby as a reward, I don't know what will work. I feel like a failure and am about to look up addiction/recovery strategies. Anyone have suggestions?!?!?

 

[terripeachy]

Vonn-does fruit satisfy your sugar craving? I had the best tasting watermelon today. It tasted like jolly ranchers. Other than that, I'm out of suggestions except maybe talking to someone about your addiction and how to find ways to temper it. I hope you get your bfp. That would be so awesome.

Weezy-welcome back. Of course we remember you. Fill us in on the latest!

Hi to everyone else.

 

[Clizard]

Vonn, no real suggestions on addiction, but remind yourself that at least you are getting back on the wagon everyday! That by itself shows you are determined and deserving. Keep going, it will get easier and that's my trick when I have a few out of control high blood sugar days.
Welcome back Weezy, and hi there Pearl. It's always nice to drop in here and catch up.
Jean, are you getting any more symptoms? It's getting a bit exciting.
How about you Pussycat? Love hearing about that stuff so keep posting and don't worry about gushing x
Didn't forget you Terri. How are you going? Still waiting for AF to turn up? Just want you to know that you are kinda my hero for being so supportive to others during your own mc - your optimism is infectious. PS 'Clizard' is a combo of mine and my partners names. You should have used it in that scrabble game, as they changed the rules and you can use proper nouns now!

 

[Clizard]

...and it would have been worth a bomb in points!

 

[terripeachy]

I know they added some new words to the real scrabble and I tried playing them on words with friends but it didn't work. I'll try Clizard the next time I have those letters but I doubt I'll be so lucky.

Thanks. I'm obviously an old boring lady who had nothing better to do than read about everyone's lives and wish for the best for them and me. Maybe soon I can get a life. Hee hee.

Yes, still waiting for AF. I'm sure she'll show up the day I finally decide to be cute and wear my white jeans!

I think Vonn asked and yes, we're going to try again soon. Because I have several vacations coming up, we'll probably have a natural cycle and start bcp at the end of July. I don't know that my fertility place makes you wait. Especially because of my age and the fact that they want me to get pregnant sooner rather than later. So, that's good for me, I guess.

 

[Jean40]

No other symptoms, but I did find out what gave me the nausea, it was the vinegar I put in the salad. I opened the bottle & got a whiff and there it was. Guess I will try just olive oil and NO vinegar on my salad now.

Vonn- as for sugar addiction, what I found that helped me was cutting out all artificial sweeteners, they make me crave MORE sugar. Then you just have to give your body at least 3 weeks for the craving to go away, but it will. Since I'm back on the Coke Zero kick, I'm craving more sugars & carbs again, so once I am done with what is in the house, I'm not buying anymore. I just needed a caffeine boost every morning & I hate coffee. Hopefully in another 5 weeks or so, we'll get the coworker back from maternity leave & things won't be so crazy. I worked 11 hours on Tuesday and will have about 10 hours today, so a little caffeine goes a long way on days like this.

 

[terripeachy]

Jean-my doctors always say no caffeine/alcohol during my TWW, but most things I read say that one cup is ok. Do you think caffeine has had an effect? I know everyone is different and you do what you think is best, but i'm just curious if they put any stipulations on your TWW. Sorry you got sick from the vinegar.

 

[Pussycat1]

Jean, I agree with Terri, throughout TTC I've tried to cut out caffeine altogether, though I think the official guidelines vary.
Vonn, what about some mango or pineapple to satisfy your sweet craving?
I haven't had a beta, they don't do that here in the UK, however I have an appointment with my GP in Monday to confirm, not sure if it's a blood test or wee test. I then have my intralipid infusion Monday evening (last one). I had 2 put back, so could be twins, eek! Planning on a 7 week early scan, there's no way I can wait till 12 weeks.

 

[terripeachy]

Pussycat-I forgot to ask you, did you have any symptoms? hee hee. I like hearing about them. Usually we're all emotional and thinking everything is something, but now that you can look back, do you remember anything different? I would get the early scan too. Just for piece of mind. I hope it's not that expensive.

 

[Lastchances]

I'm 41, never been pregnant, and can't say I'm TTC (though sometimes I wonder if so on a subconscious level) but we certainly haven't been responsible in trying not to atm. He's 47. It's not like we don't know how this works. Lol. We've been having frequent sex, including all the highest risk days. The odds seem so darn low for it to happen naturally at my age. It feels like we're kinda just going for mutual plausible deniability and will rise to the occasion and embrace it if suddenly happens despite the odds.

 

[Pussycat1]

Pussycat-I forgot to ask you, did you have any symptoms? hee hee. I like hearing about them. Usually we're all emotional and thinking everything is something, but now that you can look back, do you remember anything different? I would get the early scan too. Just for piece of mind. I hope it's not that expensive.

No, I really don't think I have! I had less cramping this time, with other cycles I've had cramping from the day after transfer. I had a bit of cramping 2 or 3 day post transfer, then nothing until 6 days post transfer when I was so sure AF was coming that I took tampons out with me. I know everyone says it's a good sign but I've never been one of those to whom that's happened. I am now feeling pretty tired by the end of the day, and I should have moved my desk to the toilet today the number of times I went for a wee! Apart from that feeling pretty good. Long may it continue. x

 

[Jean40]

No, they didn't tell me I had any restrictions (well, besides alcohol, but that's a given), but it's only one soda a day, not a big deal in my book. I will cut it out completely soon enough. Again. I go through phases of drinking it and not drinking it. Considering my diet is so restricted and considerably better than it ever used to be (due to my laundry list of food intolerances and allergies), I think one soda isn't going to do that much harm. My cardiologist recommends no caffeine, but doesn't make it a serious restriction the way salt/sodium is (I told my coworker I've had a salt restricted diet since I was 5 years old).

 

[Clizard]

mutual plausible deniability
Sounds like my situation Lastchances! Welcome and let's hope you beat the odds.

 

[Weezy9]

Vonn - Will chewing sugar free gum help with the sugar craving?

Pussycat - it's brilliant to hear all your symptons - the frequent toilet trips and the tiredness. Wish you a happy and healthy 9 months : ) Please keep us updated.

Lastchance - good luck with trying naturally, don't give up hope, my GP told me one of the doctor in the same surgery got pregnant naturally at age 42.

Terri - How are you? sorry, I havent been on the thread for a while and have lost track of where you are at. Are you trying again?

Jean, Clizard and everyone I've missed - hello and baby dust to everyone for the summer.

AFM: To be honest, I have felt pretty deflated since my failed cycle and completely lost in what to do moving forward. I felt so heart broken and deflated, my DH suggested I should go for some counselling sessions. I'm not sure it's going to help me in anyway. I'm convinced that all ladies in my situation is just as emotional as me when the subject of babies come up, seeing pregnant woman and watching baby programs (though I admit I wasn't like that before my failed cycle). I feel so weak compared to some of the ladies on this and other thread who had gone through numerous failed cycles - (Pussycat, Terri, Vonn - you are my inspiration and I admire your strength).

I had lost quite a lot of my self employed clients because of my first IVF so I was worried about how to finance my next cycle too (so hence haven't been on the thread).
But the good news is we have remortgaged our house and when that is approved and the money comes in, we'll be ready to start our next cycle again : ) but for the moment, we are just trying naturally.

We have a initial consultation on monday with another clinic to get a second opinion.
My currant consultant didn't recommend us to do any immune testing as it was our first failed cycle (she thinks it's a waste of money) but I'm keen to explore that. I kind of feel, I don't have much time left to see how many failed cycle I'm going to have before getting immunes tested. I might as well check everything out and increase my chances in the first instance. Has anyone had ureplasma and mycoplasma tested before?
Someone on another thread recommend getting all my immune tests and possibly my next cycle done abroad and I'm actually also looking into that. They suggested Serum in Greece (I think) as I've been told they have good success rates with older ladies like us.
Has anyone been there or looked into that?
Pussycat - did you go to Czech Republic?

We are going to to see a nutritionist next week also just to see if she can recommend any supplement and diet changes for me and DH (Vonn, I can ask her about sugar craving for you if we have time left and jean I can ask her about Caffine on TWW if it's not too late - I'm seeing her next saturday).

Have a lovely weekend everyone : )

 

[terripeachy]

Weezy- I'm happy that you are going to try again and great news on the house and such. We didn't have immunity testing done but we did have some general genetic testing done prior to our first IUI cycles and all was well. We are planning to get the chromosomal testing done this time around because I think it's our last hope to figure out somewhat what is wrong.

Now, when I say we, I really mean me. I'm frustrated because it's all my doing and yes, while my hubs wants a baby he's not at all "supportive." He doesn't talk too much so it's fairly normal but it would be nice to hear him ask when AF is coming or when we can try again. All this stuff is just in my brain and I feel like if we have kids it's all still going to be in my brain and he'll just say 'thanks! I'm the dad.' Then I get to thinking that maybe we should stop trying and he can lead his quiet life and I can lead a childless life. Long story short, you're not alone. If I could have a time machine, I'd like to see him go through all this and see how he would handle it.

And then of course, seeing everyone else get pregnant while many of us are still on the sidelines really sucks big balls.

So, I've vented plenty and I'm enjoying my coffee and my dog and I'll be ok for the day.

Thanks for being here, girls. You truly are lifesavers.

 

[Pussycat1]

Terri / Weezy my other half was exactly the same. Everything we've done has been instigated by me and he'd definitely have given up before now. It is so hard when everyone around you gets that BFP, believe me I know and is got to the stage where I was the only one left from the original posters.
Weezy I'll message you later about overseas clinics and immune testing. x

 

[Pussycat1]

Weezy, immune testing is a really controversial unproven area, there's no real hard and fast evidence but lots of suggestions that this could be the key to lots of issues. I am not surprised your clinic don't recommend testing mine didn't either until after I used donor eggs and it still didn't work. I wish I'd paid the £1000 earlier on and it could potentially have saved me a lot, however hindsight is a wonderful thing. Read Dr Beers 'is your body baby friendly'. I had my testing done through the clinic id been at in the UK then went to Czech Republic (Reprofit in Brno) armed with the knowledge of how the UK clinic would treat me for my possible immune issues. Reprofit are not experts in immune treatment and prefer you to have an immunologist if you have issues, I didn't which is perhaps a little risky, but I knew the protocol my UK clinic would use and they were experienced. I believe that Serum in Athens are meant to be very good with immune treatments and issues surrounding. I chose Reprofit as they have one of the largest donor pools in the world and very good success rates. Remember to ask not only about success rates but also clinical pregnancy rates as the two can be very different. It is really worth doing your own reading and research round it (pros and cons) as must Fertility experts will have very clear opinions and so much of it is subjective. However all I can say is the things I did different this cycle from previous we're as follows and I am now pregnant:
Endometrial scratch the cycle before
25mg prednisone (rather than previous 0mg or 5mg)
PIO shots rather than suppositories
Embryo transfer under anaesthesia
I have no idea which if any made the difference or if I just got lucky.
Good luck with thinking it through. I can't remember if your UK or US but treatment abroad really was easy. x

 

[Jean40]

Interesting info, especially about immune problems. I asked TWO different REs about whether my autoimmune disease (which is under control) could cause any issues and they said no. If I get further down this road towards FET (with donor embryo), then I will push for testing.

Tonight I am watching webinars on women with heart defects health issues. The only thing about the caffeine (which I already knew about) was massive doses, as in Monster energy drinks or things of that sort. Mostly this one is about balance in your life, which many women deal with. There is another one just on having a baby that I will watch after this one. I am to the point where they are discussing fertility treatments and THIS is what I wanted to know! They said the safest option of fertility treatment is treating with drugs such as clomid & doing IUI. When you get into hyperstimulation of ovaries, women with heart issues have a MUCH higher risk of heart failure due to OHSS. Then there is also the anesthesia issue when doing an egg retrieval, women with heart problems (even ones that are fixed, like mine is) have a FOUR TIMES higher risk of dying under anesthesia than other people. I already knew that, it's the reason the two minor surgeries I've had since then I refused to go under anesthesia, I just had the area numbed and had the procedures done (they really WERE minor). I had an orthodontist who wanted to completely reconstruct my face in my mid teens due to my strange upper palate & wide jaw. I'm lucky my parents let ME decide and I went elsewhere for a second opinion (luckily, we had two orthodontists in our small town) and it was corrected completely with orthodontics (well, for the most part, my dentist thinks it's half assed, lol). Anyway, this has been very interesting and I am glad I did NOT go through harvesting my eggs in my 20s for use later when I had money for a gestational carrier (which is what the plan was if I had found a partner earlier in my life). Woah boy. Lots to think about.

I also found this article earlier and her experience with adoption and foster care are so close to what I went through.
https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/health/a32895/johnson-embryo-adoption/

 

[Clizard]

Interesting article Jean. Sorry you had this experience. I am not in a position to even try for fostering as my OH is just ambivalent about having kids. Always has been, even though he was a bit excited when I got pg. I guess I could try and do it alone, but I have always been a bit 'lazy' about having kids myself. It was just when I got pg and had a mc I felt so alone, as though someone had ripped my heart out and I couldn't share it with anyone. Even my mum was a bit dismissive, although she had several herself. So I came on here and stalked for a while until I joined.
Vonn, did I read you mention a tingle in your breasts on another thread? That was my first symptom - felt like a guitar string went 'ping' in there and then they started throbbing and getting bigger, a cup size in a week! Then the waves of nausea started. I hope Pussycat is just the start of a few BFP's on here.