A Limbo thread...

[CeeCee2010]

Thanks ladies for being so supportive and putting up with my moaning XXX Love to you all, just fed up today! Am writing my grievance letter as we speak so may post it hear before I give it to him so that I can get constructive criticism lol xxx

 

[Lauki]

CeeCee made the 500th post! Yay for us!

RachyRoux, sorry to hear you are going through the worrying! I hope all will turn out fine !

 

[ClaireMuir123]

Hey ladies!

Samira, hope you're feeling better soon

Ceecee, I just can't believe this has been going on for so long! Definately phone that number that someone else gave (can't remember who said it, sorry, memory like a sieve ) and get him sorted out!

AFM....... where do I start...... Basically my sister has turned on me, yet again........ she's got 3 kids and works but doesn't have sufficient childcare for them, so expects me and my Mum to pick them up from school and watch them during holidays etc. I done it for a while and eventually had enough because she was ripping the piss, asking me to take them home (10 miles away) pay for their food, discipline them etc so I was constantly losing money to save her finding a childminder. In the end I changed my hours at work and only watched them on occasion. But every time she's fallen out with me in the past it's always because I can't or won't watch her kids. She does the same with my Mum aswell!

This time she asked me to watch her 3yo son overnight on Friday (who is a handful, I mean he's a wee shit and she won't discipline him) and I said no because OH had a night out and MIL was watching Jayden because I've been really tired and sore... the texts go like this.....
Last night............
Sis: Hi hows u? I'm working on sat morning 1st thing, could you watch (nephew) for me please...x
Me: I can't, alan has a night out and MIL is watching Jayden, sorry
Sis: Lol. OK x
Sis: I've got great family support eh... what you think?
Me: What do you want me to do??
Sis: Nothing...
Me: Then don't make me feel guilty about it, you know how sore SPD is! x

This morning....
Sis: Boo hoo...
Me: R u for real?!
Sis: Yeah I'm fuckin real.
Me: What do you want me to do? It's ur job to find suitable childcare before you agree to work outside your hours, not mine, and as for support? Don't get me started
Sis: Yeah that's right and that's what I do... wat support? You bother about no-one
Me: OK then
Sis: N thats when u know it's true
Me: Think what you want Emma, I really don't care. I've had enough of u turning on me cos you don't have anyone to watch the kids! Don't text back, I'm not interested.
Sis: Ur 1 with the problem, I cudnt care less if I seen u again....



WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!? What on earth am I supposed to do about that?! I'll tell you want, feck all because I'm sick of being used as a childminder and an emotional punchbag when she doesn't get her own way!! She is 28 years old for gods sake! She could start an arguement in an empty room! I honestly think theres something mentally wrong with her and she needs help. She acts like a petulant child and cries to my dad when she doesn't get her own way. I've had enough of her crap................ sorry I had to get that out.... xxx

 

[yasmin13]

Aww... sisters can be a pain sometimes...!

I've also had problems with my younger sister and I know it isn't nice at all.

We no longer talk to each other and even though it's sad I just cant forgive and forget.

Maybe you just need to get some space away from her? Maybe that will help her realise? Or maybe not?? But you need to think about yourself and your family.

 

[ClaireMuir123]

Thanks Yasmin, I don't see her very often but everytime she does see me it's because she wants me to do something for her. Does she honestly think that I'd send my son to his grans house then watch another child?! I know she wouldn't and don't think many would! xxxx

 

[Rachyroux]

Thanks Yasmin, I don't see her very often but everytime she does see me it's because she wants me to do something for her. Does she honestly think that I'd send my son to his grans house then watch another child?! I know she wouldn't and don't think many would! xxxx

I agree, give her some space to appericiate how lucky she is to have you! how ungreatful. Family ey. I know it's hard but tryyyy not to worry, it's not worth the stress. Hopefully she'll see what she's done, how she's come across and apologise. xx

 

[Lauki]

How horrible that things like that happen . I love my sisters dearly and really miss them as I only see them about 3 times a year! Maybe that's why we get along so well !

Then again, I must admit that I wouldn't want to be used like that. Obviously looking after the kids sometimes really wouldn't be a bother, but she should get her things sorted and not just expect everyone to sort things out for her! I hope she'll realize soon how much you've helped her already and that her kids are her responsibility! Hope things cool down for you soon!

 

[ClaireMuir123]

That's what she done last time Rach, gave me a cuddle and apologised and it's the exact same thing she's doing this time! I will NOT speak to her until she's apologised, I am very stubborn and she knows it. I also know that she'll go and bad mouth me to her kids, she's done the same with my Mum xxx

 

[ClaireMuir123]

How horrible that things like that happen . I love my sisters dearly and really miss them as I only see them about 3 times a year! Maybe that's why we get along so well !

Then again, I must admit that I wouldn't want to be used like that. Obviously looking after the kids sometimes really wouldn't be a bother, but she should get her things sorted and not just expect everyone to sort things out for her! I hope she'll realize soon how much you've helped her already and that her kids are her responsibility! Hope things cool down for you soon!

We used to get on great! Then she met her man and I only ever see her if she wants me to watch her kids and I'm sick of it. Since my wedding she's asked me to go out maybe twice or 3 times, whereas before it was almost every week, just a bottle of wine in the pub but it was enough. Now she's got her man to go out with she doesn't bother with me. It never bothered me too much but it just mad me realise that she was using me to get a night out and now she only needs me for babysitting and I'm not doing it x

 

[yasmin13]

She does sound like she's used to getting her own way. Like she snaps her fingers and expects you to jump. Maybe once she's apologised you can talk to her about that? I mean you have your own kids and life and are not there solely to be her babysitter. Yes family should help each other but not take the p*ss...

 

[Lauki]

That must have been so hard for you when you realised that!
It's weird how people can change sometimes. And also scary as I wonder if I have changed in a bad way as well !

 

[Rachyroux]

aw sorry to hear it isn't the first time... wait for her apology and then maybe just be straight and stern and tell her how she is honestly making you feel.

 

[ClaireMuir123]

She kicks off big time if she doesn't get her own way. She had a full day off work one day a few weeks ago and the kids were at school and nursery, but phoned my mum at 2.30pm to ask her to pick them all up because she was getting her hair done! Mum said no because she was going out and of course sis kicked off big time! She asks like a child and I'm sick of it. If it weren't for the fact she's got kids I'd cut her off all together. I lvoe her, but I don't like her xxx

 

[ClaireMuir123]

It isn't the 1st time by any means! xxx

 

[yasmin13]

I do understand... really I do. It's family and you feel sad because you have a picture of what it used to be like and what it should be like but over the years people change. I also used to get along with my sister but the way things are now we don't talk, she isn't coming near my baby and I've said I dont want to go to her wedding. It sounds harsh but I said to DH that one day when she truely realises what she did then maybe... but right now she's not sorry.

 

[ClaireMuir123]

I'm sorry you're having troubles too Yasmin. I know people change and while I was a bit upset when she stopped asking me out, I was happy she had a new man because she had the worst boyfriend in history before she found him. But she expects me to drop everything to help her out.

She asks to take my son out but in all honesty I don't want her to, she doesn't think about car safety when the kids are in the car, my nephew is only 3 and a half and is in a booster seat - he should be in at least a group 2 car seat, her 5 yo and 8 yo aren't in anything! And she doesn't discipline her son when he's been naughty so runs riot, and Jayden copies him. I know kids copy but I don't want Jayden copying that behaviour and she does nothing to stop it. So I don't want him playing with his own cousin - how bad is that!?!?!? He's as spoiled as she is and it's not his fault, he knows no better. AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xxx

 

[Rachyroux]

Not the same situation AT ALL. But, my cousin and I were more like sisters, we were so close, we went on holidays to france every year and were inseperable. Now she's a totally different person after uni and can't keep her nasty mouth shut. She only gets in touch when she's not on a date or if she's drunk. She's said things like
"your baby is going to be an alien haha" I know she's trying to be funny, but well it's not is it?
"your baby is my practice baby, so if I break it, oh well I hand it back it's not mine"
Like hell am I going to let her hold my daughter after that!
So I Know how it feels to have a member of the family frustrate and upset you, and you wanting it to be how it used to be. xxxx

 

[yasmin13]

It’s not bad hun, you’re just thinking of your kids… that’s what any mother will do. And I definitely wouldn’t want my child in a car without a carseat!

Have you spoken to her about all of this?

 

[ClaireMuir123]

I've told her that the 2 youngest kids at least should be in car seats but she doesn't pay any attention, she's too wrapped up in her own world! xxx

 

[yasmin13]

Well I don't think there is much more you can do. It is a shame but dont contact her again for a while and see what happens. When she does apologise tell her you will only accept it when she realises that she cant continue to treat you like that and your relationship with her needs to change.

On a different note, bubba is going wild in my tummy.