Thanks. It must be so hard to have to be the one to do everything all the time. I know I complain that I can't be home to do it all, but it is also nice to have that break. Yes she is very involved, but there really isn't an option for her not to be. Thats been a hard pill for me to swallow- that we each have to give the other one room to parent. Most people I talked to at work during my emotional outburst last weekend said the best thing I can do is to give them room to figure it out and that I just have to let them work it out- however that looks like. Some even said how great it will be for J to learn those different things from each of us. I guess they are right. We will both always do right by him so I need to remember that and let the rest of it go. Even though it killed me to say, I did tell my wife that I cant control what she does when I'm at work and that if she gets to the point that she wants to sleep train- I made her promise me two things. 1. That she would lie on his floor and never leave him alone crying and 2. Protect my heart and lie to me about it. I don't think it will come to that though. I think all of this will slowly move into a better pattern, especially if we continue to work on putting him down more and more awake and then treating the wake ups the same. The wake ups are what's hard to change, because of the exhaustion, but one of these days I'll follow through and work on it. Thanks for your support. So much of the emotions on this journey I wasn't prepared for. You're a good friend.
Accupuncture ladies-from TTC to BFP
- Thread starter gingmg
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Ging - sounds like your coworkers have given you some great advice. I think it is so true that you have to give the other parent room to be a parent. I'm terrible at that - hovering over my husband when he's taking care of our little one.
Well we are now on phase two of sleep training! She has learned to roll back to front and stand. So as soon as I lay her in her cot no matter how tired she is, she just rolls right over and stands up! Arggggggh! I guess it is a reminder that there's always a new challenge and it's ever changing. I can't believe what I used to wastes my time worrying about - even 2 months ago.
All too soon this problem will pass Ging and you'll have a new one to worry about. None of us are prepared for this journey. It really tests you!
You're a great friend too. Sending you lots of hugs.
Well we are now on phase two of sleep training! She has learned to roll back to front and stand. So as soon as I lay her in her cot no matter how tired she is, she just rolls right over and stands up! Arggggggh! I guess it is a reminder that there's always a new challenge and it's ever changing. I can't believe what I used to wastes my time worrying about - even 2 months ago.
All too soon this problem will pass Ging and you'll have a new one to worry about. None of us are prepared for this journey. It really tests you!
You're a great friend too. Sending you lots of hugs.
Ah jazz- j does the same. I put him down on his side and he rolls right over and stands right up. So frustrating! It usually takes a few tries before he accepts it and goes to sleep. I have to keep a firm hand on his back and pat his bum now so he doesn't roll over and stand up. And I thought I was getting closer to being able to put him down and taking a step back while he was falling asleep. Nope! Back to bum patting so that he doesn't stand up. I just look at it that at least he is falling asleep in the crib, even if it is with my help.
I don't even want to write this but he has actually slept through 3 nights in this past week. And by sleeping through I mean 10 or 11 to 6- but hey, I'll take it. It sure beats waking every 2 hours. And the nights he hasn't slept through its only been waking once around 10 and once around 3- so much better than we were. We have definitely turned a corner- just in time for teething and then probably another sleep regression. Can't wait! Ha ha.
I just had another long stretch off and then will be working all weekend- I really hope this sleep continues for my wife while I'm gone. I'd almost rather her nights be better than mine.
I don't even want to write this but he has actually slept through 3 nights in this past week. And by sleeping through I mean 10 or 11 to 6- but hey, I'll take it. It sure beats waking every 2 hours. And the nights he hasn't slept through its only been waking once around 10 and once around 3- so much better than we were. We have definitely turned a corner- just in time for teething and then probably another sleep regression. Can't wait! Ha ha.
I just had another long stretch off and then will be working all weekend- I really hope this sleep continues for my wife while I'm gone. I'd almost rather her nights be better than mine.
Sorry I've been behind on catching up.
Ging, sounds like things are going better with the sleep. As the others have told you, just go with your instinct and be consistent. He will get the hang of it; it sounds like he is well on his way now.
G is now eating solids. After my last post, I did wait a couple more weeks and then suddenly she accepted the food. She LOVES it, too. However, with it has come horrible constipation. Poor thing. She has given herself an anal fissure from trying to strain with hard poops. Ugh! I felt so bad for her. It must have been painful and she was such a trooper. My doctor suggested more fiber in her diet and some Miralx. I gave her that, and then she had and explosive poops for a day or two, but now she's back to being constipated again. Argh! I've been feeding her prunes, but so far, nothing. Let me know if you have any suggestions.
Ging, sounds like things are going better with the sleep. As the others have told you, just go with your instinct and be consistent. He will get the hang of it; it sounds like he is well on his way now.
G is now eating solids. After my last post, I did wait a couple more weeks and then suddenly she accepted the food. She LOVES it, too. However, with it has come horrible constipation. Poor thing. She has given herself an anal fissure from trying to strain with hard poops. Ugh! I felt so bad for her. It must have been painful and she was such a trooper. My doctor suggested more fiber in her diet and some Miralx. I gave her that, and then she had and explosive poops for a day or two, but now she's back to being constipated again. Argh! I've been feeding her prunes, but so far, nothing. Let me know if you have any suggestions.
Melly- Oh no! Poor girl! Unfortunately the only suggestions I have are what you are doing- prunes, fiber, and miralax if needed. Do you give her water? That might help too? Hopefully once her body gets used to the solids the constipation will ease up. Glad she is enjoying her food though. How awful if she hated it and then in addition got constipated.
Hi Melly - ah that really sucks. Poor little thing. I have a fissure and they are painful.
I give my baby lots of apple and pear purée if i suspect constipation. She loves it. If you steam the apples and pears after peeling them - it is much easier for them to digest and a good way of getting water into their diet. I've just made a batch. Try to give it to her as her lunchtime dessert. I also feed her banana at breakfast.
Mine doesn't really like water so it's hard to get more liquid in but this is supposed to help too with constipation.
Xxx
I give my baby lots of apple and pear purée if i suspect constipation. She loves it. If you steam the apples and pears after peeling them - it is much easier for them to digest and a good way of getting water into their diet. I've just made a batch. Try to give it to her as her lunchtime dessert. I also feed her banana at breakfast.
Mine doesn't really like water so it's hard to get more liquid in but this is supposed to help too with constipation.
Xxx
Thanks for the suggestions. I've been trying to give her water, but she's not a huge fan of it yet. I bought organic prune juice today, so I'm going to mix that in with her food. The fissure doesn't seem to be causing her as much pain this week...thankfully. I'm just hoping she can get her little digestive system functioning. She's in good spirits and happy, all things considering.
That's interesting that they told you to use coconut oil- it seems that coconut oil is good for so many things. I keep hearing of all these different uses for it. I wouldn't see why you couldn't use it for a baby. I use it as a diaper cream sometimes, actually saw that on here somewhere. I also use it on his eczema patches that he gets every once in a while.
Ging - I didn't know you could put it on eczema - my girl has some really bad red rashes. I'm going to try! Thanks!
I know what you mean though - there's been loads of press about coconut oil and its benefits recently.
I just came off laxatives and my fissure is back. I think my next appointment will be discussing surgical options sadly. It heals so long as I'm on laxatives then reopens once I'm off them. Childbirth has really screwed up my body!
I think I'm going to try and push my baby to nap once a day around lunch. She will sleep 2 hours from 9.30 and then won't nap in the afternoon or she'll fight it. Perhaps it will sort out her 5am starts too.
I know what you mean though - there's been loads of press about coconut oil and its benefits recently.
I just came off laxatives and my fissure is back. I think my next appointment will be discussing surgical options sadly. It heals so long as I'm on laxatives then reopens once I'm off them. Childbirth has really screwed up my body!
I think I'm going to try and push my baby to nap once a day around lunch. She will sleep 2 hours from 9.30 and then won't nap in the afternoon or she'll fight it. Perhaps it will sort out her 5am starts too.
Thanks for the suggestion of the coconut oil. I will try that. She is now passing much softer stools, so she is no longer in pain (or at least from what I can tell). I do have to load her up on fiber rich foods though in order to accomplish that. Jazz, that sucks about your fissure. Yours must be really bad in order to have surgery. Yes, pregnancy and childbirth does a number on our bodies, some worse than others.
Grethchen naps are still inconsistent, but they are there at least. She usually takes at least two a day, however, only one is usually decent the other naps are short. I really have never been able to get her on a good nap schedule, and I think I've tried really hard to be consistent. Her nights are good though, so I stopped fighting it.
Grethchen naps are still inconsistent, but they are there at least. She usually takes at least two a day, however, only one is usually decent the other naps are short. I really have never been able to get her on a good nap schedule, and I think I've tried really hard to be consistent. Her nights are good though, so I stopped fighting it.
Hi Melly - great news your little one has softer stools again. Their poo timings and consistency vary hugely.
As for naps - she's only 6 months old - naps become a lot more consistent when she gets to 8-10 months. Although Autumn's naps vary now but she always has 2 - one around 9.30 and one around 2. I have to wake her up from her morning nap after 30 mins or she won't sleep in the afternoon. I'm looking forwards to her dropping her morning nap as I'm hoping it might help her sort out her early morning waking. That would be heaven! I'm not asking for miracles, just til 6am!
As for naps - she's only 6 months old - naps become a lot more consistent when she gets to 8-10 months. Although Autumn's naps vary now but she always has 2 - one around 9.30 and one around 2. I have to wake her up from her morning nap after 30 mins or she won't sleep in the afternoon. I'm looking forwards to her dropping her morning nap as I'm hoping it might help her sort out her early morning waking. That would be heaven! I'm not asking for miracles, just til 6am!
Jazz sorry to hear about the fissure still causing problems. If you do need surgery I hope its quick, with an easy recovery and that it solves the problem. So sorry you ate going through this!
Have you dropped a nap yet? I hope it helps your eaearly morning wake ups. I've got an early riser too, it's exhausting!
Melly- how's Gretchen doing?
Have you dropped a nap yet? I hope it helps your eaearly morning wake ups. I've got an early riser too, it's exhausting!
Melly- how's Gretchen doing?
Hi Everyone...Sorry it's been so long.
Gretchen is now 8 months old! Wow! Where has the time gon?!? The poor little thing still has some constipation issues, so we give her mirilax. It's taking awhile for her system to adjust to solids, but it's getting better. Her naps are now in full swing. Two a day, once in the morning and then around 1PM (now). She usually naps anywhere from 45 minutes up to 2+ hours. It's very random though as to how long it may be. On her water babies swim days her naps are much longer. She now sleeps all night from 7PM-7AM. :happy dance: I must admit, I got lucky with this sleep schedule. She is now cutting her first teeth (the two bottom), and has now been biting me when breastfeeding once in awhile. OUCH!!!! I wasn't eager to ween her, but with this biting starting to happen, it may be sooner than I anticipated.
My husband and I have been talking about baby #2. To be honest, when we first started IVF, I would have been happy with only one, and told my husband we're only having one. However, Gretchen has been such a joy and I love her so much, I just want her to have a sibling. We think we'll do it next summer. We still have 5 embies frozen, so it would be a matter of implanting one of those. Two children under the age of three sounds exhausting, but I think I can tough through it for the first few years. I'll also be in my early 40s, so youth is no longer on my side.
How is everyone doing? Jazz, your little girl just celebrated a first birthday right?
Ging, how is Jack doing?
Hope everyone else is doing well!
Gretchen is now 8 months old! Wow! Where has the time gon?!? The poor little thing still has some constipation issues, so we give her mirilax. It's taking awhile for her system to adjust to solids, but it's getting better. Her naps are now in full swing. Two a day, once in the morning and then around 1PM (now). She usually naps anywhere from 45 minutes up to 2+ hours. It's very random though as to how long it may be. On her water babies swim days her naps are much longer. She now sleeps all night from 7PM-7AM. :happy dance: I must admit, I got lucky with this sleep schedule. She is now cutting her first teeth (the two bottom), and has now been biting me when breastfeeding once in awhile. OUCH!!!! I wasn't eager to ween her, but with this biting starting to happen, it may be sooner than I anticipated.
My husband and I have been talking about baby #2. To be honest, when we first started IVF, I would have been happy with only one, and told my husband we're only having one. However, Gretchen has been such a joy and I love her so much, I just want her to have a sibling. We think we'll do it next summer. We still have 5 embies frozen, so it would be a matter of implanting one of those. Two children under the age of three sounds exhausting, but I think I can tough through it for the first few years. I'll also be in my early 40s, so youth is no longer on my side.
How is everyone doing? Jazz, your little girl just celebrated a first birthday right?
Ging, how is Jack doing?
Hope everyone else is doing well!
Hey Melly!
So lovely to receive your update. Sorry to hear she is struggling with her movements. Does she drink much fluid? Does she eat much fruit/veg? So hard when they struggle. Mine eats loads of fruit so hers are on the loose side.
Sounds like you have a little angel!!! 12 hours straight at night and long naps sound like heaven.
We only ever manage 10.5 hours (to the minute!) at night. So I put her down at 7.30 and she wakes 6am or earlier. Then she does 2 naps - morning one is around 1 hr, afternoon about 30 mins. She just doesn't need as much sleep.
You are right - she's 1 now! Actually 13 months. I'm starting too to feel broody again - I think we may start trying soonish. I agree 2 under 3 will be hard work for s couple of years but we just got back from holiday. Taking all these photos of her on beaches, fairground rides just makes you picture two. She is so sociable too and loves other children. We'll see - I wouldn't be devastated if we stopped at 1.
I'm in a bit of an anxious mess as we are supposed to do mmr jab soon and I've been reading all these studies linking it to autism and all the studies refuting it. Such a responsibility. She's had all her jabs so far but this one worries me. I'm sure we'll go ahead but something tells me there is a link for a very small predisposed portion of the population.
You never stop worrying do you?
We are almost walking too and have 8 teeth!
How is everyone else? Missing all your updates
Xxx
So lovely to receive your update. Sorry to hear she is struggling with her movements. Does she drink much fluid? Does she eat much fruit/veg? So hard when they struggle. Mine eats loads of fruit so hers are on the loose side.
Sounds like you have a little angel!!! 12 hours straight at night and long naps sound like heaven.
We only ever manage 10.5 hours (to the minute!) at night. So I put her down at 7.30 and she wakes 6am or earlier. Then she does 2 naps - morning one is around 1 hr, afternoon about 30 mins. She just doesn't need as much sleep.
You are right - she's 1 now! Actually 13 months. I'm starting too to feel broody again - I think we may start trying soonish. I agree 2 under 3 will be hard work for s couple of years but we just got back from holiday. Taking all these photos of her on beaches, fairground rides just makes you picture two. She is so sociable too and loves other children. We'll see - I wouldn't be devastated if we stopped at 1.
I'm in a bit of an anxious mess as we are supposed to do mmr jab soon and I've been reading all these studies linking it to autism and all the studies refuting it. Such a responsibility. She's had all her jabs so far but this one worries me. I'm sure we'll go ahead but something tells me there is a link for a very small predisposed portion of the population.
You never stop worrying do you?
We are almost walking too and have 8 teeth!
How is everyone else? Missing all your updates
Xxx
Hi! So good to hear from you both! Lovely updates. So glad sleep is going so well for both of you. Its much better here than it used to be, but still not sleeping through. Its a work in progress, I guess. I trust he will get there when he is ready. His two naps are pretty solid from 1-2 hours each and last night he only woke up once- seeing as how bad it used to be, I have no compliants.
Melly sorry to hear about Gs constipation. Glad the miralax is helping. The biting is rough, ouch! When J first started teething he bit me a few times accidentally and I was afraid I'd have to wean him earlier than I wanted too, but he hasn't done it in awhile so I'm hoping it was just a learning curve.
Jazz- can't believe she is one already!! I think you are right that the worrying never stops. I used to think I'd have no problems with vaccines, but something has changed in me since having J. I do them, but its never without concern and hesitation. I'm going to feel the same as you with the MMR vaccine. I know I'll still do it, but I'll obsess about it first and for a bit after. Glad your fissure is finally better!
We are starting to talk about number 2 as well. I'm not quite ready yet, but sometime this year before next summer I think we will start trying. We only have one embryo before we have to start over with a fresh IVF cycle. I'm a little traumatized from the lack of sleep to want to start over from the beginning but I really do want him to have a sibling. We can all be pregnant again together!
J is doing well. He is taking a few steps and gets into absolutely everything. Climbing stairs, climbing furniture, climbing up on drawers, trying to climb over the baby gates, moving chairs around the kitchen, emptying out drawers, unraveling the toilet paper, dropping things into the toilet, ect. He doesn't sit still for anything and gets frustrated really easily. He will sit still for books and the shape sorting block thing, but that's about it. Oh and cars. Loves wheels. Other than that he doesnt sit and play with toys. He carries the toys around with him as he does laps around the house trying to find something to open, pull down, rip, chew, ect. I literally have to play fetch with him in the back yard with balls to wear him out. The only reason he lies still long enough for me to change his diaper without pinning him down now is because he found his penis. He is already such a boy.
He's a joy and I love every inch of him, but he's not an easy baby. He never has been. Now that I see his personality unfolding its starting to make sense how he was never that sleepy newborn, never slept well at night, and just needed so much help (and still does) to be able to slow down and rest. But I wouldn't trade him for anything. He is the light of my life and I can't imagine life without him. I also can't imagine loving another baby as much as I love him.
Anyway, that's all here. Lovely to hear from you. Stay in touch.
Melly sorry to hear about Gs constipation. Glad the miralax is helping. The biting is rough, ouch! When J first started teething he bit me a few times accidentally and I was afraid I'd have to wean him earlier than I wanted too, but he hasn't done it in awhile so I'm hoping it was just a learning curve.
Jazz- can't believe she is one already!! I think you are right that the worrying never stops. I used to think I'd have no problems with vaccines, but something has changed in me since having J. I do them, but its never without concern and hesitation. I'm going to feel the same as you with the MMR vaccine. I know I'll still do it, but I'll obsess about it first and for a bit after. Glad your fissure is finally better!
We are starting to talk about number 2 as well. I'm not quite ready yet, but sometime this year before next summer I think we will start trying. We only have one embryo before we have to start over with a fresh IVF cycle. I'm a little traumatized from the lack of sleep to want to start over from the beginning but I really do want him to have a sibling. We can all be pregnant again together!
J is doing well. He is taking a few steps and gets into absolutely everything. Climbing stairs, climbing furniture, climbing up on drawers, trying to climb over the baby gates, moving chairs around the kitchen, emptying out drawers, unraveling the toilet paper, dropping things into the toilet, ect. He doesn't sit still for anything and gets frustrated really easily. He will sit still for books and the shape sorting block thing, but that's about it. Oh and cars. Loves wheels. Other than that he doesnt sit and play with toys. He carries the toys around with him as he does laps around the house trying to find something to open, pull down, rip, chew, ect. I literally have to play fetch with him in the back yard with balls to wear him out. The only reason he lies still long enough for me to change his diaper without pinning him down now is because he found his penis. He is already such a boy.
He's a joy and I love every inch of him, but he's not an easy baby. He never has been. Now that I see his personality unfolding its starting to make sense how he was never that sleepy newborn, never slept well at night, and just needed so much help (and still does) to be able to slow down and rest. But I wouldn't trade him for anything. He is the light of my life and I can't imagine life without him. I also can't imagine loving another baby as much as I love him.
Anyway, that's all here. Lovely to hear from you. Stay in touch.
Ging - you sound in love!!!! Such a nice update. I hear what you are saying about yours never being a sleepy baby because mine isn't either. Just today I was at a toddler group and this 10 month old just conked out on his mum. She said it was because she is such a relaxed mum but I know that mine would NEVER fall asleep under bright lights with so much activity! Some babies just want to see the world!!!
Glad I'm not the only one worrying about mmr - spoke with the mums at the toddler group and they thought I was nuts. Oh well! I am probably!!!
I have my first ivf patient this week so very busy studying recommended points and treatment protocols during down regulation and egg collection. I'm very nervous but excited too.
Anyway - yes let's all get pregnant again together! I think it may take me a while as it took us a year first time round. I want to go back on herbs but uk has imposed eu regulations that are so stringent and expensive to get certified that I can't buy them anywhere. It's so sad! We have lost access to a major health channel. I'm looking at getting them shipped from USA but somehow I think customs will detain them ...
Glad I'm not the only one worrying about mmr - spoke with the mums at the toddler group and they thought I was nuts. Oh well! I am probably!!!
I have my first ivf patient this week so very busy studying recommended points and treatment protocols during down regulation and egg collection. I'm very nervous but excited too.
Anyway - yes let's all get pregnant again together! I think it may take me a while as it took us a year first time round. I want to go back on herbs but uk has imposed eu regulations that are so stringent and expensive to get certified that I can't buy them anywhere. It's so sad! We have lost access to a major health channel. I'm looking at getting them shipped from USA but somehow I think customs will detain them ...
Jazz- so exciting that you have started practicing acupuncture again. Its so important to do the things we love and have some time to ourselves. As much as I complain about work, its nice to have that break and time away. And its nice to keep your skills up and learn new things. Now if I could only take my own advice and get back into yoga...I miss it like crazy!!!
Its good to be prepared that it could take awhile to get pregnant, but you really never know. It could be easier this time now that your body has done it once before.
Its good to be prepared that it could take awhile to get pregnant, but you really never know. It could be easier this time now that your body has done it once before.
Wow! Where has the time gone?!? I'm so happy to see everyone's updates. Sounds like everyone is doing great.
Jazz, I'm so happy to read that you're practicing acupuncture. I know you will be able to help many IVF ladies, as I was a patient before and greatly appreciated the help.
Ging: Little J sounds so fun. He is ALL boy. Nothing wrong with that. He is active and wants to do and see things. I think that's a good trait, and quite frankly, better than the alternative. It's good to be curious about the world.
Can't believe G is almost 10 months old. It's bitter sweet. I'm amazed just how fast the first year goes by, especially these last few months. G's constipation has gotten better and now she's crawling and discovering how to get into everything.
Glad to hear from everyone and sorry it's been so long. I do agree that it would fun if we all got pregnant together! Sounds like we're all thinking about next year sometime.
Jazz, I'm so happy to read that you're practicing acupuncture. I know you will be able to help many IVF ladies, as I was a patient before and greatly appreciated the help.
Ging: Little J sounds so fun. He is ALL boy. Nothing wrong with that. He is active and wants to do and see things. I think that's a good trait, and quite frankly, better than the alternative. It's good to be curious about the world.
Can't believe G is almost 10 months old. It's bitter sweet. I'm amazed just how fast the first year goes by, especially these last few months. G's constipation has gotten better and now she's crawling and discovering how to get into everything.
Glad to hear from everyone and sorry it's been so long. I do agree that it would fun if we all got pregnant together! Sounds like we're all thinking about next year sometime.
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