anixety panic attacks and depression surpport group

[Jkelmum]

Glad they are helping you ...

I know I am due on soon as the headaches bloatyness and tension is starting ...seem to be snappy at the moment ...so ordered a indian to cheer me up lol

Thank-you for the welcome ...for so long i havent opened up for fear of people judging or thinking i am a headcase but ive decided stuff what they think i need to open up for me and maybe if people understood why i am how i am at times maybe i wont be one of the most hated people around

 

[jogami]

I happened across this thread not by accident! I was looking for some encouragement. I suffer with depression and anxiety and was on Nuzak (Prozak generic) for at least 5 years before I fell pregnant. I stopped immediately when I fell pg, and tbh didn't need it the whole 9 months, I felt great and excited (although very anxious and worried about every little thing). This week has been hell, I feel the dip and just know that I'm getting to that dark place again. I'm crying for no reason at all, having irrational thoughts and just feel like crawling up in a ball. To add to this is the fact that I don't feel like the best mum for my DS. He is soooooooo precious and deserves better than me Sorry, just really have to share... Also DH is working away and will only be home Easter which makes it even worse! I know I have to get back to the doc asap (going to try get out of work for a while tomorrow) to get a prescription. I stupidly threw away all my meds when I fell pg and spent today frantically looking for them. What keeps me going is my beautiful baby boy...

Thanks for reading

 

[PepsiChic]

Needa - im so so glad you talked to your union about it and that they agreed something had to be done, i know it can be stressful adding yet more things to deal with, but hopefuly the outcome will be that everything ends up being easier for you at work. *hugs*

jkelmum, you do not need to feel fear about opening up here, we understand how you feel and we certainly dont hate you! *hugs* i hope the indian helped! i miss a good curry since i moved to the usa!


Welcome jogami!, im so glad that you went looking and found us! Im sorry that youve been a suffered of depression for so long, im also a long time sufferer, its horrible when you look back and realise just how long its been. but saying it and realising it is part of healing and understanding!

A lot of people feel more depressed when they are pregnant, but I was one of the few who was FINE during the pregnancy but afterwards is when everything started to come back. The first 3 or 4 months are really hard with a Lo anyway.

I think that all of us here in this group have at some point in time thought that we arent good mothers, or shouldnt of become mothers, i know it crosses my mind quite often. but its NOT true, you love your DS, you would never HARM him, you would give your LIFE for him, so you ARE the PERFECT mother for him! just because you have depression doesnt make you a bad evil person, and those are the people who SHOULDNT be mothers, your a great mum

Easter is that far away maybe you could mark the days counting down till your OH is home? crossing them off every day might make you feel a bit better.

big hugs hunny, we're here for you! x

 

[jogami]

Needa - im so so glad you talked to your union about it and that they agreed something had to be done, i know it can be stressful adding yet more things to deal with, but hopefuly the outcome will be that everything ends up being easier for you at work. *hugs*

jkelmum, you do not need to feel fear about opening up here, we understand how you feel and we certainly dont hate you! *hugs* i hope the indian helped! i miss a good curry since i moved to the usa!


Welcome jogami!, im so glad that you went looking and found us! Im sorry that youve been a suffered of depression for so long, im also a long time sufferer, its horrible when you look back and realise just how long its been. but saying it and realising it is part of healing and understanding!

A lot of people feel more depressed when they are pregnant, but I was one of the few who was FINE during the pregnancy but afterwards is when everything started to come back. The first 3 or 4 months are really hard with a Lo anyway.

I think that all of us here in this group have at some point in time thought that we arent good mothers, or shouldnt of become mothers, i know it crosses my mind quite often. but its NOT true, you love your DS, you would never HARM him, you would give your LIFE for him, so you ARE the PERFECT mother for him! just because you have depression doesnt make you a bad evil person, and those are the people who SHOULDNT be mothers, your a great mum

Easter is that far away maybe you could mark the days counting down till your OH is home? crossing them off every day might make you feel a bit better.

big hugs hunny, we're here for you! x

This means more than you know!!! Already I feel better. I didn't go into work today, told my boss I wasn't feeling well and he was fine with it will catch it all up tomorrow! Went to the doctor and as soon as I got there I burst into tears. He was really wonderful and understanding and then proceeded to show me a diagram of what happens to the brain and serotonin levels and how it is a very valid illness and I shouldn't feel bad about it. He made me understand how while I was pregnant my hormones were high (thus keeping my moods elevated); and how I've since weaned back into PMS mode. I hadn't thought of this as I was on Eglinol (a A-D for breastfeeding moms) and instead of weaning myself off I stopped cold turkey! I only used it as I heard it brought milk production up and it did, I was squirting the stuff out again *TMI* When DS started rejecting the boob I stopped it. He put me back on Nuzak and mild calmants til I feel better. Already tonight DS wasn't crying as much. I felt so calm rocking him and speaking to him he was not his fussy self at all. On the first day of meds I feel different and I think he senses it too. It just doesn't seem so dark and gloomy anymore suddenly. I don't know if it's all psychological as I'm only on Day 1 all over again, but it feels good and I hope it lasts!

Pepsi what a great idea I will now look forward to DH coming home and preparing. He has booked over Easter as we want to get LO christened and bonus for us both is that there are alot of public (bank) holidays over that period. I get to put in 3 days leave and get a whole 10 days out of it So yes something very much to look forward to xXx

How are you all feeling and sending and best xxx

 

[sanjalica]

I'm done. I feel like I just can't take anymore. I went off my meds for a while and really screwed myself up. Then was forced to go back on them (January) and ever since then I just feel horrible. I don't know if I'm coming or going. I thought by going to work that that would help by giving me something to do and keeping me occupied... but all that meant was that I finished all of my work for the entire week in less than one day and the rest of the day I would just sit there and cry and think. I went to my family doctor today and he changed my meds again and put me off of work for a week. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel mentally and physically drained. I want to sleep but I can't seem to shut my head off for long enough to let me sleep. And on the off chance that I do fall asleep... I'm up in about 2 hours anyway. It just won't stop.

 

[sanjalica]

Sorry for the long rant. Just felt like I needed to get it out of me.

 

[jogami]

I'm done. I feel like I just can't take anymore. I went off my meds for a while and really screwed myself up. Then was forced to go back on them (January) and ever since then I just feel horrible. I don't know if I'm coming or going. I thought by going to work that that would help by giving me something to do and keeping me occupied... but all that meant was that I finished all of my work for the entire week in less than one day and the rest of the day I would just sit there and cry and think. I went to my family doctor today and he changed my meds again and put me off of work for a week. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel mentally and physically drained. I want to sleep but I can't seem to shut my head off for long enough to let me sleep. And on the off chance that I do fall asleep... I'm up in about 2 hours anyway. It just won't stop.

Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuge hun! Can the doctor not give you something to help you sleep better? I am also a very light sleeper and toss and turn and think and think aaaaaaargh Well try the meds the doc has prescribed now and maybe just ask for some mild tranquilisers. It may just calm your spirit for a day or two and get you back to a place where you feel like you're getting on top of things xxx

 

[9babiesgone]

I really really dont want to be depressed anymore. I will do anything to make it stop. but i have tried so much.

 

[PepsiChic]

jogami, im so so glad your feeling better! And im so proud of you going back to the doctors, that must of been hard but you did it! I really hope the medication helps you, and even if it doesnt, dont worry! there are other types and different dosages, and your doctor can help you find the best ones and best dosage to help you feel better! *hugs*

sanjalica *hugs* take all the time you need off of work, you should tell your doctor that you need something to help you sleep, he should be able to give you something to help you x

9babies, do you do any exercise? even something small like 5 sit ups a day can help improve your depression slightly, thinking of you hunny x

 

[9babiesgone]

yeah but I shouldnt do exercise, bc I always overdo it bc of my eating disorder, and then my lupus flares.

uggh. I love exercise so much though.


I think what I will do is email a few friends. hopefully they will respond.

 

[jogami]

You can email me anytime if you feel like talking, I'd love a pen pal! Inbox me in case x

 

[sanjalica]

Thanks guys. I really don't know what I'd do if it wasn't for this place and all of you. Not only does it give me something to do and a reason to get up but it's also so nice to have support and know that there's others out there going through the same thing or that have gone through the same. As for the meds... my doc has tried a few things with me... none of them really help... and the sleep apnea doesn't help at all. He put me on 'stress leave' yesterday and wanted me to be off for a few months but I told him I wanted to just be off for one week and then see how I feel. So anyway, I just got off the phone with my work... they want paperwork and the whole story. I wish I could just tell them to piss off.

 

[Miss_d]

Thanks guys. I really don't know what I'd do if it wasn't for this place and all of you. Not only does it give me something to do and a reason to get up but it's also so nice to have support and know that there's others out there going through the same thing or that have gone through the same. As for the meds... my doc has tried a few things with me... none of them really help... and the sleep apnea doesn't help at all. He put me on 'stress leave' yesterday and wanted me to be off for a few months but I told him I wanted to just be off for one week and then see how I feel. So anyway, I just got off the phone with my work... they want paperwork and the whole story. I wish I could just tell them to piss off.

I dont know where you live, but if you have a sick note from your doctor with a reason why your off that should be enough, some work places are a nightmare, have some from me

xx

 

[Raggydoll]

Can you become immune to a dose if you've been on it a long time.


I don't understand why but I feel like I'm crashing. I don't want to let my LO and DH down but if I keep putting a brave face on my head is going to explode.

I love them so much I don't want them to think it's them. I just don't know why I can't get over this.

How am I ever going to get of this medication.

 

[PepsiChic]

Can you become immune to a dose if you've been on it a long time.


I don't understand why but I feel like I'm crashing. I don't want to let my LO and DH down but if I keep putting a brave face on my head is going to explode.

I love them so much I don't want them to think it's them. I just don't know why I can't get over this.

How am I ever going to get of this medication.

yes if you are on the same medication for a long time your body naturally builds up an immunity to it. You should ask your doctor to help you fin different mediction that helps you *hugs* and maybe have a talk with your DH and let him know your struggling right now and that you really appreciate him patience.

 

[needausername]

Yep, you can get immune to a dose after a while. You will either need an increase or a different medication.

I had some news during the week that would probably freak most people out but for me it means that I will hopefully have my life back to concentrate in getting over what has happened to me in the last 13 months soon. I'm hoping to be at least decreasing the dosage I am on by summer time. I would love to be finished with meds by the end of summer so fingers crossed everything goes well.

 

[Raggydoll]

Thanks guys. I think I've been trying to ignore it for a while. I really wanted to start reducing my medication. I was meant to get an appointment with the consultant a few weeks ago but my care coordinator has a habit of forgetting to arrange them.
I'll go to see my GP I think.
I just wish I could explain it.

Needausername glad you've got some good news. Hope reducing your meds goes well. X

 

[eblondie]

Hi everyone. Not sure where the week has gone. I haven't been around much online... not really sure why though! Things have been fairly busy here as I'm having a spring clean. My anxiety has been up and down. It doesn't help when the house is in a mess

 

[9babiesgone]

I really needed to get out today. and then my mom decided not to come over. and I am overwhelmed alone here. I think I am going to cry .....I have no one to talk to about this. so here I am. depression is making me sink low.

 

[PepsiChic]

needa im glad you got some news for things going your way at last. And i think its great that your aiming to decrease your dosage, you go girl!

Raggydoll i think seeing your GP is best hopefully eh can change up your medication to one that works well with you *hugs*

eblondie, i have no idea where this week is gone, if you find out please tell me! and spring cleaning, I started and couldnt do it it was making me anxious instead i went into the garden and started clearing out weeds, the garden being an open space seemed to really help!

9babies, i just noticed your ticker, im really hoping for a sticky bean for you, try to relax ok? the more stressed and worried and anxious you get the worse the side-effects on the pregnancy will be. we're all here for you ok? all of us! together *hugs* you are NOT alone x