any other over 35 first time mums?

[AngelUK]

That is great news Storm! What a relief! Hope he recovers quickly and without too much pain! And also that your night there goes ok and that Miss L sleeps really well!

 

[Claireyb1]

Fabulous news storm!! I hope L behaves for you and grandad tonight
Xxx

 

[Borboleta]

Hi ladies,

Have been really busy the past couple of days!

Storm: so glad your dad op went well. Hope you will survive tonight. Could he stay with you at your house instead?

Angel: If I was in your shoes and not have a period for 2 weeks I would be screaming at the world !! I can totally tell when I am PMSing!!! Why do we have to go thru this !!! Like we don't have enough to deal with ! And like the other ladies said you are a wonderful mommy and unlike us you have 2 to care for so it is double the trouble . Don't be too hard on yourself. But I understand when a black cloud sits over your head for a while . Not good isn't it .
And I agree with indigo and Leeze about the child proofing. It is so worth it. Do one thing at a time. And they will get into things that you didn't even think about proofing believe me! But like Leeze said, after a while they will loose the interest. Thiago used to get into cords and try to open cabinets and get into things but now he is not that interested anymore. His thing is to climb the dining chairs in the kitchen . I keep telling him to be careful and that he can fall down bump his head and than he will cry. He tries to be careful .
And they get bothered staying home. Thiago wants to get out in the morning and in the afternoon. So we have a routine in the morning to go on our bike rides and stop by the park before his first nap, than lunch and either run some errands or go to a children's museum or some indoor play place ( too hot to go to park In the afternoon) and than come back home and take another nap. Than he goes to the park again with OH while I teach my classes, than bathtime, dinner, play at home and bedtime. I can't wait for the fall to really start and the weather cools off a little so we can go to the park in the afternoon too. But you might have to think about indoor play places when the weather starts getting to cold. And again you are a wonderful mommy.

Kosh: can't wait to hear about your vacation.

Kitty: Blake sounds so wonderful. Does he sleeps in his bed and thru the night?

Claire, Leeze, Clio, indigo, Sabrina to all.

We are doing well. My 40th birthday is approaching !! We are going to commemorate my MIL birthday this Saturday then next Saturday we will commemorate again her birthday, my OH cousin's Husband and me and then the following Saturday we are commemorating my birthday again !!! Might just going to go out to a club and have some drinks with friends and dance a little like the good old days .
Thiago is doing great and he has two new words: balloon and stop. We might be the only ones that understand what he is saying but still . He now points at the tv and asks for coco ( pocoyo) !!! And this boy has the burst of energy at night time. He runs and laughs and goes crazy when it gets dark but not so energetic during the day.

Have to go. to all!

 

[kosh]

great news storm!!

 

[Indigo77]

Good news, Storm!

Bortoleta...Thiago can ride a bike already? Does he always have 2 naps? N hasn't been taking his 2nd nap most of the time & he's been going to bed an hour earlier, which annoys my DH because he doesn't get to spend as much time w him after work. It's too hot here to be outside in the afternoon...I am sooooo ready for autumn!

I'd love to hear about everyone's routine w their LOs...Borboleta...ours is similar...playground in the morning, then we go to my sister's house or my IL's house for a visit, then home for lunch & then nap. I get a few things done around here while he naps & then we go out again (too hot to be outside, so we go shopping or run errands or go to a soft play area at the mall, or the children's museum, or a pet store do he can see the fish, reptiles, birds, etc..), then back home so I can make dinner. Then dinner when DH gets home & they go play while I clean up & then bath & bedtime. I don't how you have the energy to teach Zumba at the end of the day because by 4 pm, I'm running on fumes.

Clio, Kosh & Angel...I hope you're ok...

& to everyone!

 

[AngelUK]

Good morning ladies
Thank you all for your kind words! They helped very much! I know that shouting is just human but I also know that this is teaching my kids that shouting at someone when angry is ok and it kinda isn't cause I certainly always felt rejected and as if I am not good enough when my father "lost it" with me. I want my boys to learn really good anger management and for that I have to work on my own first, if that makes sense?
There is quite a lot on that site that I linked that rang a bell and I really want to do better and help them to be confident and happy in themselves.
Just one more example that struck a chord, I always applaud anything they do well, such as sorting the right shape into the right hole. But I have noticed that while they are very good with the squares and the round ones, they usually don't really try with the triangle. And I think this is because it is harder and they want to please me and therefore they concentrate on what they do well. So I should actually laud effort more than achievement to instil a feeling of try try again.
Also, I never thought of praising Dominic when he does lie still during nappy changes but I am now and I think it is already making a difference and he doesn't struggle so much!
Anyway, on to personals

Indigo how are you doing? Are you ok inspite the bad news you have received? I hope it is not something utterly dreadful but I am sending you anyway! And if you need to vent, these ladies here are the so so sweet and patient and you couldn't ask for lovelier support
I love the mouse-hole! How fun is that!

Kitty_love belated happy 9 months to your sweet little Blake! Well done to him for army crawling! That is excellent! Sebastian only did this at around 10 months if I remember correctly and he did it for ages before crawling "properly". And they do get so fast with it, don't they . I hope my next remark isn't one of the dreaded ones that I should not say to the mother of a preemie but if it is, I apologise. Here goes, considering that Blake is in reality only 7 months old, this army crawling is really on the early side for development, isn't it? And that even if you didn't take his adjusted age into consideration and just went by his actual age, he would be spot on? (I know a lot of "on schedule" babies on BnB who started crawling at around his age.) If so, don't you think that he is more than catching up? To me, it sounds as though he is doing excellently well and that maybe soon you wouldn't need to calculate by adjusted age for milestones?

Sabrina I am so sorry your neighbours are being such so-and-sos! I think you are right and they think they cannot be evicted and I am sure it will be hard and a lengthy process but I do hope you will get justice eventually. Or of course you get a proper academic job somewhere and move
But if not then I hope your DH's work can accommodate your needs re Finn. Sounds like it would be very difficult if not, at the moment.

Leeze Kia sounds adorable! I bet hearing her say Back in a Second is a killer

Kosh I am so glad you had a great time! I am looking forward to seeing pics!
As for baby proofing, so far we only really have the front room that is safe and where we can leave the boys on their own for a bit. They still manage to hurt themselves of course by slipping maybe or falling over etc. But on the whole I feel quite confident of that room. The rest of the flat is a problem but we are going to get another gate and put that by the kitchen door so that the boys can have the corridor as well and hopefully eventually their own room if we manage to move OH's computer somewhere. I guess the router can be shoved under the bed and the printer is safe enough on the shelf. But really we should move, sigh.

Storm how was your night at your dad's? Is he ok? Hope not in too much pain but I am guessing they gave him meds to take? Does he have to inject things to stop blood clots? I had to after the c-section. My OH did it for me but it was no biggie as he was used to it from my fertility meds lol.
How did Miss L sleep? I hope she did and that you did too!

Claire this sounds weird, but how did the funeral go with Lucy? Was it ok? I am so sorry for your friend's loss
I am crossing my fingers for your mum's colostomy reversal! I know she must be looking forward to being rid of this thing! And hopefully L will sleep well at your mum's!

Borboleta you and the other ladies are absolutely right, I should go out more with the boys. Now that the weather is so dreadful they don't get to go to the park as we used to during summer. Here it is definitely autumn already But often there are nice dry days during autumn here and I am hoping this year also, even though we were already spoilt by a rare hot summer.
Sounds like you have a lot of fun celebrations coming up. Although... how do you feel about turning 40? I was soo devastated but mostly cause it felt that now I would never have babies. Little did I know that I would be pregnant the following year (and a bit) I think it makes a difference when you already have a baby and that pressure of the biological clock has eased up a little, doesn't it? Besides you look so gorgeous, fit and young that no one would think you 40 anyway.

Clio we miss you! I hope you are at least ok-ish and I am sending tons of

And just another little about us: Sebastian is walking! The day before yesterday, he suddenly stood up without holding on to anything and started tottering around. So far the most steps he has taken is ca 11 but he did much better from the start than Dominic did at that stage. It is still very much the zombie totter and he doesn't always want to practice but we are getting there yay! Also, Dominic walked before he managed to stand himself up without support. So I actually think that Sebastian had his balance for a while but was too timid or not interested enough to actually walk. So yay! I will try and capture it on video if I can. It is very sweet I think.
Oh also, Sebastian was so addicted to the tv (animated nursery songs and Pocoyo mainly) that we decided to trick him. OH changed the songs into MP3 which means no more animation just music and at the most 20 minutes Pocoyo while we make their dinner. And already I notice that Sebastian is playing more! What a relief! Before he used to just sit and stare at the screen. (Dominic is less interested in tv so he was less affected.)

Anyway, got to go and be with my little ones to you all my lovely ladies xx

Eta: I completely forgot what I wanted to tell you for ages now, as you know Sebastian doesn't really have many words, if any. BUUUT he does sing!! He loves "The Wheels on the Bus" and he does sing the Ding Ding Ding for the bell but the rest of the words don't sound like the original except for the Wha Wha Wha that the babies do It isn't super correct in the melody at times but it is clearly that song. I think sometimes he actually tries to sing the Gymboree version which is "Gymbo the Clown goes up and down, up and down etc." Soo cute!
Oh and also he likes the song "I went to visit a farm one day" and when she sings of the sheep he goes bahh bahh bahh

 

[SabrinaKat]

We went away for a few days, so am sorry I didn't mention it, BUT many, many thanks for you admission of anger, angel as last Thursday was a terrible day for me in terms of shouting at OH and LO. I only shout 'shut up' or 'stop', but usually, it gets LO even more tearful and I feel so horrible....I will look at that website you suggested.

we didn't have a great time and LO was cranky most of the time, but at least, I was okay yesterday and today. OH gave out to me about alot of things, and it was 60% his fault and maybe 40% mine, but sigh.....

and nope, no flexible hours for men.....

hope all are otherwise well....hugs to all and will do personals soonish....

bye

 

[Claireyb1]

Another quicky! Lol
Angel- the funeral with Lucy with me went fine. Admittedly I did have my df and mum with me, so df was able to look after/entertain her while the service was taking place. She did call out mummy once during a really quiet bit but nobody minded.
Right, must dash as I have child free time and LOADS to do!
Hugs to all.
Xxx

 

[AngelUK]

Just wanted to share quickly! OH managed to film Sebastian walking, of course enthralled to Pocoyo! But not bad for a boy who only started walking at all 2 days ago
https://youtu.be/RowxenK-lfs

 

[clio]

Kitty-- for B's crawling!!! (It's still considered crawling if they pull themselves along with their arms. It's called "the wounded soldier" crawl.) Ah, I see it is 4 days later. Little B can probably fly by now. Did he like his stacking cups?

SK--Erm... Have you considered moving?

Leeze--oh how precious, "I'll be back in a second." J says to me, "bit of a walk?" or, "ah, here it is." I love it; it's like having a parrot, and I always wanted a parrot...

I can't believe that the fart and poo jokes start so early, and with girls too!

Spoiler

(Yay for anti-essentialism!!!)

J loves sitting in his car seat, listing off everyone he knows and says (for example): "Oma toot." "Mummy toot." "Uncle Q toot." Luckily he only knows a small number of people or he'd play the game forever, if he could.


Indigo--I'm sorry about your stressful news, but as the others have said, it seems to have put things in perspective for you. I hope things are a bit better now.

The story of N is hilarious! I think that the two phrases sound very alike, and therefore--and I'm sure N agrees with this--should be added to the list of antonyms one is taught in grade school. Actions should be included.

Can I ask what your OH does? When you talk about "gigs," it sounds a lot like what me and my husband do; he waits for offers of full time but temporary contracts (but only from the same uni each time). And I wait for part time lecture gigs. What gigs does your husband do?

SK--I'm pages behind, and just read about the heating. I feel your pain. Are you still cold? In a month from now, I'll be waking up to total darkness that won't recede until after 8 am. And as the winter proceeds...

I'm sorry about your little mister! Mine isn't doing much better. Stupid back molars. NOTHING consoles him. Not even dosages of Advil and Tylenol together calm him down.

And tell your OH from me! But I hope his shift works out!

Storm--I think L is turning into the new Martha of the group. Except she might just be even nuttier. She must keep you in stitches all the time! I'm so glad that your dad is well, as well!

Borboleta--the other day, J saw little T's avatar and asked who he was. He was so fascinated that I showed him some FB photos and he kept repeating "Thiago. Thiago." (Hopefully I said it right--I don't think I did a good job on the "Ch" sound.) Anyway, I managed to film J doing this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZZ5auAemG4

Angel--J, the next day, saw S and D and began to practice their names, too. I had to run, though, so we didn't get a chance to practice for long.

And I know it is very late to chime in about you truly being a great mother, but at the time I read it, I was too upset to respond. I was too busy crying because I thought I was a horrible mother.

Honestly.

Do you know how we can say with such certainty that you are NOT a horrible mother? We have known you and the boys for over a year now, and every thing you say about yourself and the boys shows a very loving and thoughtful (incredibly thoughtful) woman, who is raising some incredible kids. Big hugs.

What is "aha parenting?" What do you think the book might help you with? From what you've said about waking the boys up, though, I can totally see how "attachment" parenting would be hard.

Storm actually said something I was going to: you can't baby proof everything, and you'd be surprised at how much they understand, like "Don't touch!" and "Danger!" Have you played them the Pocoyo episode (it's on YouTube) where Ellie is making a castle out of blocks and has P watch out over it? Reminding J of that episode is a great way to stop him from touching things. After a while, anyway, J simply lost interest in cords and other potentially dangerous things, just like Leeze said. Though fragile things can be another matter. Do you have friends who would take your vases until the boys are older? Or, could you rent a storage locker? I don't think they're that expensive. In Canada, that is...

kosh--I guess that leads to your question. We had one gate up that had to be taken down for safety reasons (too unstable), stuck plastic things in our sockets, and put safety locks on dangerous cupboards, but otherwise, we didn't do much. We trust him basically everywhere, which frankly, comes down to our laziness. Only, he's not allowed in the basement. Litter, cat food, water dish, my pot paraphernalia, laundry... Too many things to get into. It's neat, though; because he had access to the stairs leading to the second floor, he practiced and practiced until he finally got it right--he walked down the stairs with no assistance and no handrail !


AFM--J said "I love you!" Seriously melted my whole body. OH has been trying to get J to say it to him, too, but so far, no dice. haha

The visit by my mum was good. She stayed at a lovely B&B out in the countryside, but was still only 15 minutes away from us. She had my old car, too, so she could come and go when she pleased. This alleviated a lot of the tension, and I didn't have to vacate my bedroom for her. And she really helped this time.

I've enrolled J in a gymnastics program that came very highly recommended by our next door neighbour who teaches hockey for a living. But when we went, it turned out it was easier than Gymboree, which he had done over six months ago. J also acted up horribly and only wanted to bounce on the trampoline. I want to move him up to the next level, but he has to be within a month of his 2nd birthdate. So, November. This is, apparently, an unbreakable rule, which I am going to beg them to break. Or, just threaten to withdraw. There's a cheaper swimming class I can enrol him in instead at a different recreation centre, if only I could just get ahold of them!

How are your LOs in group settings where they have to sit by you? J is horrible and won't stay put. Can you believe that in order to keep him from crying while sitting in the gymnastics class circle, I had to hold him upside down by his legs so I could hear what the coach had to say? Are your LOs better because they've been to creche, or because they've had more exposure to groups? I never made him sit in a group because he was so young; when we were at Gymboree, I let him wander during the group stuff because he refused to stay still for longer than a second. Is this my fault, because I never trained him properly?

 

[clio]

Turns out, I missed a page. The one re: routine. Here's my answer:

Borboleta--are you insane?

Indigo--are you only slightly less insane than Borboleta?

AFM--I'm now planning to look into more things to do with J and feeling extraordinarily guilty.

Um...J is only up for 2 hours in the morning, then goes down for a long nap, so mornings are typically J-free. When he is up in the morning, he plays independently, too. Sometimes he and I will go for walks around our crescent, or down to the pond, but most of the time, we hang around the house.

Something's usually going down in the afternoon, though. We all get bored hanging around the house, so we find any reason to go out. It's rarely exciting, though. Often J's outing is a run to the grocery store. He goes to Oma's a lot.

But in the late afternoons and early evenings, we stay outside, go for more walks, play in the back yard, practice the tricycle in the front, draw on the sidewalk, and play with the kids on our section of the street.

This is called the Couch Potato method of parenting, whereby I need to do very little. Forget "attachment parenting"; I practice "detachment parenting."

 

[clio]

Angel--Sebastian is walking!!! Hooray for Sebastian!

J loves Wheels on a Bus too! He does the WaaWaaWaa part and the ShhShhShh part and acts out the up and down part! He also tries to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star," and "e-i-e-i-o." But that's the extent of his lyrical repertoire.

 

[Storm1jet2]

Where is everyone? Nothing much to report here, spent of the weekend with my dad, L was a bit off colour on Sunday and had a huge fight with DH on Sunday as he freaked out cause L called him Paul... yes I know I told her everyones name but seriously I didn't think it was such a big deal! He was so mad I left him and took L and the dog and went to my dads for 5 hours without him and then the git went to bed last night and slept right through and left me looking after L all night (not a great night as she was poorly) and yet I was the one that had to get up for work today and he has today off to do with as he pleased while he hoofed L into nursery at 9 am... Honestly I could scream.. actually I might just scream... ok I need to stop now.

How is everyone else doing? Any major LO developments, how are the TTC ladies getting on!

I need your posts to keep distracted enough that I don't try and strangle DH (joking obviously but seriously he needs a good shake....)

 

[Borboleta]

Hi ladies,

Storm: the lady that cleans my day's house in Brasil has a grandson and since he was very little he decided that he was going to call his mom and dad by their names instead ! And he never called them by mom and dad again. I guess it was not a huge deal . Strange I know . But tell you husband a.k.a Paul that all he needs to do is to tell L that his name is daddy for her.
And I have those moments too when you just want to finish with my OH !!!

Clio: so good to see you here. It sounds like you are doing better . Have you spoke with your doctor yet? And glad to hear that your mom's visit went great. My dad is coming the first week of November just for one week, but better than nothing I guess .
And yes I think I am insane ! I am always planning things to do with thiago. This morning we went for almost one hour bike ride pointing at every stop sign we could find . I am tired. I hate bikes to tell you the truth. They are so uncomfortable!!! But the boy likes it so I keep pedaling .
And that is so cute that J said thiago . I couldn't open the video but I will try on my regular laptop. And couldn't open Angel's either it said private video. And thiago sounds like you are saying the word tai chi. The chi is the same sound you do for thiago's name. "Tchiago".

Indigo: thiago can't ride a bike yet. Although we have a little bike for him and he loves when we put him on it and push him around. He has a little sit in from our sit in the bike and we take him for rides.

Angel: did I say for Sebastian walking? That is so wonderful. I am going to try to see if I can watch your video.

Not much happening here either. OH have been really enjoying his new job, and we think thiago is interacting with us more. Like trying to communicate. He loves the TV !!! He wants pocoyo all the time!!! That is why I try to go out with him so he forgets the tv. Does J still loves pocoyo Clio? Oh, we bought thiago the new pocoyo circus video ( I know I am not helping his tv addiction ).. He loves it. Yesterday I let him on his diapers outside in the driveway and brought a toy that we put water in it and some paint and paper to see what he would do and he like the water toy and didnt want to have anything to do with the paint. So I had to put that away for a while.

And it sounds like a lot of our LOs are getting the back molars. Thiago still in the process. I can't see anything back there yet but I am sure they will make an apperance soon enough I hope!!! Thank you Advil!!

Bye ladies.

 

[Claireyb1]

Nothing much here either ladies
Another weekend gone and already looking forward to the next!
Lucy has now started saying mummy and now of course won't stop! When she really wants me she says mummeeee with the emphasis on the eeeee sound at the end so cute! And today I had her say for the 1st time " hello mummy" not that I had gone anywhere? The other room perhaps? Lol
Right, squeaks from the bedroom so must dash.
Night all.
Just quickly- storm - I will give your dh a shake for you!!! How childish to throw a strop about that!
Xxx

 

[Leeze]

Very quick one - Storm, your OH needs to understand L's just practising with communicating and learning about names. Kia occasionally calls us by our first names after she hears us addressing each other. She also called MIL "Mum" the other day after OH did. I think its cute. She's trying to impress him not upset him. I think its easy to forget sometimes how little they are because they develop so quickly and seem so grown-up. Big hugs to you XX

 

[Borboleta]

OMG just saw the two videos from clio and Angel!!! They are so cute!!!!
Clio: you are saying thiago perfectly!! And i love your accent!!!

Angel: Seb is walking so good!! And i laughed how pocoyo has totally put a spell on Seb too . His little eyes look just like thiago's eyes when he sees pocoyo !!!!! And Dom could care less ! At least one of your boys are saved!

 

[charlie15]

Hello again ladies, just thought I'd pop back and say hello before we leave sydney for the north. Have read a few posts here and there, so apologies for any omissions, not intended.

Firstly Storm, your OH needs to chill out, like Leeze says she's learning and practising words and sounds, big hugs to you for him not manning up in the night when you have to work and he didn't and you're preggers! Honestly, men sometimes! My OH on the whole is great, but he and we have our moments which often stem from him putting his own needs before Sophia's at times. But he's getting better and remembering that he 's a dad!

Angel, yey for a walking Sebastian!! Hope you're well, fancy meeting up again when we get home? And you are so not a bad mum! Total opposite in my opinion, you are way to considerate and self aware to be a bad mum. I have moments when I think I am going to loose it and tbh OH probably gets the brunt of it. Leeze I love those links to orange rhino and aha parenting, very useful.

Borboleta, ah that's so lovely that you do so much cycling for T even though you get a sore butt! Very sweet.

Clio, hope you are well and things are back on track.

All is good here, Sophia is a huge hit with the family and has been a very easy baby to travel with, minus a few hours on the plane between HK and Sydney, when I felt so guilty about bringing her on this trip but she dealt with jet lag better than the rest of us, just lots of sleeping, luckily she will sleep in any cot anywhere with her music on, so that is great! We now have a cruiser, she is walking pretty well holding onto the furniture. Where we have been staying is great for Sophia as it's huge and open plan, so lots of room to roam!

Anyway, need to pack as leaving Sydney tomorrow for Queensland I love this city, always sad to leave, but more family to see up north.

Hope everyone else is well x

 

[SabrinaKat]

hello, all! sorry for the non-communication, but the staff room computer at work wasn't/isn't working and at home, somebody gets cranky if he isn't at the laptop and I don't mean OH!

absolutely nothing here, think I am getting AF, but not too fussed to be honest. Um, we are seriously talking relocating as we are both getting fed up with economic woes and having so little money (to be fair, though, I am only working part-time, but that is my decision until LO gets a little older OR...I get a proper academic job and I am starting to look at those (not alot of hours at university, but loads of preparation at home, but I have loads of 'cheat sheets' from previous teaching and if I do language teaching (in that case, Latin), it would be fun for me anyway), so might be returning to USA or Canada next year. Clio - if you or OH hear of any jobs, let me know! We're just tired of working hard and paying loads of taxes when our lovely neighbours don't work and annoy us with the LOUD TV!

Not much here - hope all are well. Glad that your OH likes the new job, Borboleta! and storm, will try to keep you amused!and charlie - will need your tips on how to survive flights (we're off to the USA for Xmas) and to everybody else, hugs!

and hugs!

 

[clio]

OMG just saw the two videos from clio and Angel!!! They are so cute!!!!
Clio: you are saying thiago perfectly!! And i love your accent!!!

Angel: Seb is walking so good!! And i laughed how pocoyo has totally put a spell on Seb too . His little eyes look just like thiago's eyes when he sees pocoyo !!!!! And Dom could care less ! At least one of your boys are saved!

What accent? My Canadian accent is actually the one they train American TV news anchors to use. My accent is universally understood by North Americans, apparently.

Pocoyo. Like a drug...

Have app't. Will write again later...