any other over 35 first time mums?

[SabrinaKat]

It really made me realise how invisible a mothers work is, while dads seems to wear a high vis jacket if they just pick their LO up! Grrrr. I absolutely agree, charlie!

Very grumpy and cranky LO today (along with mummy....). My jaw is still hurting from the two very deep cavities filled last Friday -- the dentist had to give me three (3) injections and he did warn me that it would be sore for a few days, but OMG - it is still pretty painful. It was throbbing last night and kept me awake, so took some meds about 2am (solpadeine (tylenol with codeine), but it has caffeine (sp) so it's a last resort at night (only if I get one of my terrible migraines), and then LO was fussy about 4am. YAWN.

um.....sorry no real personals - I must try to post (POST!) an application off tomorrow morning as it has to go to the USA by the 10th October....sigh. If I do get an academic job, I will need a part-time nanny as LO is not happy when mummy is busy on the laptop (yes, looking at shopping, but still!)....

and yes, it's 1 and 1/2 years salary, but he's been there for almost 18 years!

hugs and bye-bye!

 

[AngelUK]

Just quickly, am back from Switzerland and am knackered. My three men are full of cold and mum wasn't well either and I am battling it too. Typical! But apart from that all is well.
Will try to answer more in detail soon but just wanted to say:
kosh you poor thing! Does sound like you are going through a rough patch at the moment. I hope things will improve really soon and that both you and DH will find great jobs if you do have to move!

Charlie welcome back and yay for teeth!!

kitty Yay for teeth for your lovely Blake too! And as Sophia, my boys had no problems with teething either. I use it as an excuse for Sebastian's clingy-ness lately but really I don't know if it really is that, as they have been fine on the whole. So fingers crossed that Blake won't suffer with them either

keebs don't worry about not being able to post much, we have some busy ladies on this thread too and they know that it is fine to just drop in when ever they have 5 minutes

Clio I am sorry if I fail your litmus test but I never watched any BSG, neither old or new. . I was a Spockette (if I can call myself that), TNGer and DS9er though, if that counts for anything? And I can only say that Big Bang is NOTHING at all like any of those series lol.

Sabrina every time you tell us how your DH says But you wanted a baby, I get angry for you! So what if you were the one who initially wanted a baby. Is he saying that now that Finn is here he doesn't want him?! Cause if he does want him, then who cares who's idea he was 3 or 4 years ago! GAH! What a cop out! That is like saying "you wanted to buy a house, not me, so therefore I will not look after it, will not pay any bills for it and just let it go to hell". Grr!

Storm I am very excited for your scan Please post piccies if you get some?
As for your question about nick names or short forms, my boys have so many that it is quite ridiculous! I doubt that Sebastian knows that his name is in fact Sebastian. We call him Sebling, Sebeling or Seblington etc. Dominic is Domdom or Domford and sometimes Domsie or Don Dombino of the Dombino Cry Family (though he doesn't really cry half as much as he did when tiny). Yes, we are seriously silly and I have no idea why or how we came up with those names. My paternal grandmother used to say "Ein geliebtes Kind hat viele Namen." Which means "A loved child has many names". Which was remarkable, as German was not her first, second or even third language, which is why I guess I remember it But also because it has always been true for me even with my pets (my fur children )

Borboleta again happy birthday (belatedly on here) Hope you had a great day and were spoilt as you clearly deserve to be.

Sending to you all xx

 

[Leeze]

Borboleta - that completely sounds like the kind of thing my OH would say - re reminding him to make an effort. What is it with taking some personal responsibility? I said to mine recently that sometimes he says things to me in a really bossy way and I'd prefer if he was more loving and considerate - he says I should just assume everything he says is meant in a loving and considerate way!!!!

Welcome Keebs. Really glad you said hello and hope you continue to do so. My AF didnt come back for 19 months due to breastfeeding and my cycles are still a bit unpredictable

hugs to all.XX

PS - AF got me so no BFP this month

 

[Indigo77]

Angel...tell us about your trip! Where did you go, who did you see, did you let loose a bit? Sorry everyone is sick, though...

Sorry about AF, Leeze...

Can't wait until the scan, Storm! So exciting! ? ?

Borboleta...welcome to the 40s!

to everyone else!

 

[Borboleta]

Quick one too.

Angel: hope you all feel better soon. How bad that you came back home and everyone was sick!!! I bet your OH was so happy to see you!

Kitty: yeah for tooth!! Thiago too had his first tooth at ecxatly one week before he was 4 months like Gael !! Babies are so different!!!

Charlie: welcome back!! How is poor little Sophia . Good thing you are a nurse. Are you going to take her to a doctor? I hate seeing them sick .

Leeze: I loved you post!! So similar!! And another thing my OH does that I hate is when thiago is about to fall or hurt himself or grab something that he shouldn't because he would get hurt my OH says look he is going to fall or he is eating a rock but he doesn't do anything about !!!! I get furious!!!

Sabrina: hope you get a job here in the US so we can get together one day. Maybe Kitty can meet us too.

Clio: hope your phisio went well.

Storm: can't wait to her what the baby is.

Kosh: why Canada and not the US? Is warmer here . And what do you mean by being more flexible than OH?

Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes. Have to go. Bye.

 

[AngelUK]

Gah! Dominic is awake, chucking dummies out of his cot and chatting to Sebastian who is trying to sleep. Why must he wake at this time?! Last night apparently it was Sebastian who was awake from 10:45 to 12:45 but at least he just lies quietly in the dark, mostly. We went to bed at 10:30 as we are both run down hoping for a good night's sleep and now it is 1am and I am in the kitchen with the monitor so that Nick can sleep on. Sigh.

Indigo it was not a pleasure trip as such. I went home to Zurich with the last flight on Sunday, had to renew my Swiss passport this morning and in the afternoon saw a lawyer about a will etc. Then flew back to London at 5 in the afternoon. Got so spend some time alone with my mum at my family home and slept in my lovely old room and mum drove me around today and back to the airport which was lovely. But that is all.

Leeze sorry AF got you! But then again Storm did say the first cycle of ttc is just to get back into the swing of things

 

[kosh]

quick one

borboleta - i forgot happy belated birthday! as indigo says, welcome to the 40's, it's a friendly place
by flexible (prob a bad translation from the Spanish) I meant that I adapt more easily to changes (or at least I try).
re. why Canada - many reasons but a very important one: publicly funded health care!

leeze - sorry about AF. fingers crossed for next cycle!!

indigo/clio - sorry about AF issues

charlie - sorry sophia is ill. hope she gets better soon!!

angel - I love your grandmother's saying. we too have lots of made up names for Gael, but when it comes to his real name storm, no, we don't shorten it (how? ) or anything.


someone was up at 5:40am today.......

 

[Storm1jet2]

Morning ladies - I probably should have said that we have a number of names for L, Lyds, baby bug, bug etc.. its just random people changing her name that irritates me!

We had a rough night last night, 2 bottles before bed, 3 during the night... random squeaking etc.. I've been awake since 4.30 and man am I tired now!

3 more sleeps until the big scan, I'm scared! So many of the ladies in the second trimester have had bad news at their 20 week scan (although I will be 21+3) - so I'm hoping everything ok. DH is convinced this one is a boy (I'm not bothered) so now I'm worried he will be disappointed if its another girl as this is most certainly our last... arrghhhh Oh and I'm huge, I have a photo of me at my uncles funeral (as we went to England for it so its with my aunt) at 21 weeks and I am soooo much smaller than this time, I think I'm going to explode this time!

Leeze, sorry AF got you - are you planning on testing for O again this time? SK where are you in your cycle at the moment? Anywhere near O?

I'm so tired I can't think straight today - oh and L insisted on taking a toy dog to nursery today, its a pink poodle on a pink stick lead and when you press the handle it barks - lol my dad bought her it - its so tacky! But bless her I couldn't be bothered arguing this am...

SK sorry your teeth are sore - I hate it when it takes them ages to settle!

Charlie hope S feels better soon!

Ok better go and do some work before I actually nod off... tired tired tired....

 

[charlie15]

Thanks ladies, maybe whooping cough may be just a side effect of me being a nurse!! She is still poorly though with this awful hacking cough that only happens every few hours, in between she's sort of OK, a little whiney at the moment, but that's ti be expected. I did take her to the doc yesterday and am to go back if this cough doesn't improve. I also have a cold and am pooped, Sophia has been my Velcro baby, but to the point now that she has to sleep next to me with an arm or foot on me, if I leave she is awake and screaming, I feel like I have a new baby all over again. I am sure this new level of needing mum is as she is ill, so hoping it will pass as she gets better as I haven't even unpacked our suitcase yet! So I am here again with a sleeping Sophia next to me.

Kosh, have you or your OH been to Canada? I use to think about emigrating there but nit anymore, am happy here.

Storm, I am sure it will all be good with the scan, but I also remember been petrified of both scans. Love the pink poodle of Lydia's! So funny. We also have lots of names for Sophia, he main one is Bunkie, no idea why, it just stuck from birth and she responds to both Sophia and Bunkie I also hate other people meddling with Sophias name, grrrrr.

Angel hope all your boys are on the mend and you don't catch the lurgy!

SK, I totally agree with angel re your OH saying that you wanted a baby!! Bang out of line, I do believe he played a small part in the creation of F!

Borboleta, how is your OH finding his job? Is T still a budding footie star?

Right off to take the chance to nap myself. Bye ladies x

 

[charlie15]

Thanks ladies, maybe whooping cough may be just a side effect of me being a nurse!! She is still poorly though with this awful hacking cough that only happens every few hours, in between she's sort of OK, a little whiney at the moment, but that's ti be expected. I did take her to the doc yesterday and am to go back if this cough doesn't improve. I also have a cold and am pooped, Sophia has been my Velcro baby, but to the point now that she has to sleep next to me with an arm or foot on me, if I leave she is awake and screaming, I feel like I have a new baby all over again. I am sure this new level of needing mum is as she is ill, so hoping it will pass as she gets better as I haven't even unpacked our suitcase yet! So I am here again with a sleeping Sophia next to me.

Kosh, have you or your OH been to Canada? I use to think about emigrating there but nit anymore, am happy here.

Storm, I am sure it will all be good with the scan, but I also remember been petrified of both scans. Love the pink poodle of Lydia's! So funny. We also have lots of names for Sophia, he main one is Bunkie, no idea why, it just stuck from birth and she responds to both Sophia and Bunkie I also hate other people meddling with Sophias name, grrrrr.

Angel hope all your boys are on the mend and you don't catch the lurgy!

SK, I totally agree with angel re your OH saying that you wanted a baby!! Bang out of line, I do believe he played a small part in the creation of F!

Borboleta, how is your OH finding his job? Is T still a budding footie star?

Right off to take the chance to nap myself. Bye ladies x

 

[SabrinaKat]

not a great day - OH is being particularly annoying, but of course, it's all my fault.... he took the day off so we could go to the american embassy -- I went to work and he slept in and didn't hoover the living room or even empty the rubbish. Then I wrote this list:

sippy lemon cup
formula
rice cakes in bag
yellow remote
'smart' phone
a book or two?
foxy ....of items to be placed in blue bag (with nappies and nappy bags) and..

he forgot rice cakes (e.g. in a list of things to go into a bag, he assumed that rice cakes in bag meant that they were already in the bag, even though all of the other items were to go into the bag), so I got a lecture on how to be clear, e.g. write 'PUT RICE CAKES INTO A BAG AND PUT INTO BIG BAG'. Notice however I didn't need to use any verbs with the rest of the items....sigh. Then, he didn't empty rubbish, so I commented on that, and he started screaming at me, etc. and LO had done a poopie, so he put him in the shower and LO hated that....

just a yucky day and one of my references has commented that even though I have language teaching skills, it isn't for Latin, so perhaps I will find it hard to get a job - I AM NOT A CLASSICIST -- I am applying for ROMAN HISTORY jobs....GROWL!!!!!!!!

hugs,

 

[Borboleta]

Sabrina: typical man!! I would totally understand your list . Sometimes I wonder if our boys are going to be like our OHs !!! I apologize in advance for our little girls of the group !!

Kosh: I would say that I adapt more easy than my OH too. And free care is a wonderful reason to move to Canada . Maybe when I turn 65 I will move close to Clio . Although I hate cold weather !

Storm: love the pictures of L on Facebook. She is such a cute.

Charlie: hope S's cough goes away poor little thing. And my OH love his new job. He is very busy with lots of projects. But that is a good thing. They only thing I don't like very much is that he decided that he has to go to bed by 8:30pm !! So he can relax and go to sleep. While I take care of thiago and out him down and hopefully go to bed around 10:15pm.
And little t hasn't been playing soccer very often anymore. I think he got tired of it. He is really into his train, specially Thomas the train. It is electric and he loves it. He actually played by himself for about 45 min yesterday!!! I couldn't believe it! He never wants to play by himself!

Angel: I am so sorry Dom woke you up last night. Thiago does that once in a while. Not very often but it is like they wake up and they are ready to go at 2 am. I learned to leave him in there unless he is screaming bloody murder.

Actually I am wondering if I should move thiago to one nap. The past week or so he has been wanting to sleep past 7am but I don't let him otherwise he won't take two naps. But when I go wake him up he just doesn't want to wake up! And than I have to wake him up again from his first nap because he wants to sleep in past 12pm and again I don't want him to do that otherwise he won't take his second nap. And than again we wake him up at 5pm so he can go to sleep around 9:30pm or 10pm. I might do a test and see until what time he sleeps in the morning and let him take one nap around 12pm or 1pm.

to all.

 

[SabrinaKat]

We mainly do one nap a day now weekdays - he gets one around 12-2 at creche (I pick up around 2-ish), and usually doesn't want an afternoon nap later, and so he gets a bath around 8-ish and is asleep by 10. Weekends, we give a morning nap around 10ish and then he may have an afternoon nap (but the last few Saturdays and Sundays, he's slept 10.30 to 1-ish, so no later nap)....we do 'quiet time' later afternoon anyway (e.g. I may close the curtains and we curl up on the sofa and watch Judge Judy and if he feels like sleeping ok, but if not, we do have some 'down time'....

Finn is getting very, very, VERY clingy at the moment and gets very upset if whoever is playing with him leaves to go to the bathroom (which can get tricky!), so I am not sure whether it's lack of sleep making him more cranky OR toddler-ish separation anxiety, but it can get....a bit tiresome. I love him so much, but yes, mummy does need a few minutes to herself....

hugs to all!
bye!

 

[charlie15]

Borboleta, good to hear hubby is enjoying his job but bed before T?! Would drive me nuts too. What time does he actually go to sleep after his down time? Men can be so like LO's can't they? I have to let Sophia have relaxing down time before sleep too Yey for T playing with his train set alone! I love train sets, I think I may get Sophia one when she is a little older to continue my efforts at been blind to gender!

SK, it is hard work isn't it when they need us around more than usual, I know they can go through phases of separation anxiety until 5. Sophia is going through it at the moment, but only with me. She's happy with others but wants me around always, if I am not there, then she gets on with it but as soon as she sees me, I am all hers! She use to be quite happy on the other side of the safety gate with me in the kitchen or bathroom, but now she cries and screams standing there until I pick her up. Yesterday was tough, I may try the baby carrier today but that normally frustrates her as she loves to move ALL the time

Can I ask you ladies with older babies a question? What was the biggest difference you noticed between baby and toddler? I ask as next month Sophia will turn 1 and shortly after I will be back at work I am working part time, 2 long days a week, one at the weekend. OH works 10 hour days 4 days a week so the plan was for him to be with Sophia on those 2 days. However I am getting slightly concerned that he may not be able to manage Sophia himself. Don't get me wrong he is a great Dad and he adores his little girl, but he is not very patient and can loose his patience easily,even when I am around. So I do wonder how he will cope on his own all day with her. The older Sophia gets the more she is testing boundaries and being very headstrong, which I know are all totally normal for her age, but I am guessing this will get more so and that you need more patience as she gets older? Have you ladies found that the 2nd year is harder and more testing? One idea I have had is to get Soohia into a local Montessori for and afternoon once a week on the day that OH is with her, just for 3 hours, so at least it breaks the day up . It does annoy me that OH cannot be more patient with Sophia, but I just don't want Sophia to be on the brunt of her Dads inability to stay calmer! Sorry that was a long waffle, right back to sleep for me as it's 5.30 am. X

 

[Storm1jet2]

Charlie DH gets on with L much better now that she is older - mind you he still dumps her in nursery as he doesn't have set shifts as we have to pay for all 5 days anyway. Im not sure DH could cope with 2 full days with her on his own, actually tbh he probably could but don't expect anything else to be done he will probably look after S and that will be it, dishes, clothes etc will probably still be sitting! L is definately easier to look after now that ever before - yes she runs around like a lunatic but you can play with her, take her places and amuse her and she can communicate quite well what she wants Its hard going back to work but tbh I do love being me while I'm at work and not just mummy, I just wish I had the option of fewer days a week...

I'm in a right spat with DH right now, without putting details on here he did something that I was 110% against and he knew it and I'm furious (I told him if he got involved he would have his own divorce to worry about), its with regards to his brother and SIL who are in the middle of a bitter divorce and it has put him in a for me at least worrying position... quite frankly he has been bl**dy stupid and I want to slap him - instead I spent an hour last night telling him how screwed up his family are, how stupid he has been and naive and if any of this impacts myself or L in anyway I will never forgive him. Its financial btw - but I cannot get my head around what a fool he has been, totally pressurised by his kn*b of a brother but still hes a 40 year old man he should say NO... arggh ok I'm ranting and thats all a bit cryptic but I'm mad mad mad mad mad.

Catch up more later and sorry for the ranting

 

[AngelUK]

Good morning ladies! What a horrible night! I hope you all slept better than me but from a comment on FB I think Storm didn't.
Well, my OH is playing GTA5 in the evenings, which meant that he was not to be wrenched away from the tv till almost midnight. Then I had trouble falling asleep as one of my mosquito bites was itching like crazy plus I had really bad heartburn. And then at 2:40ish the boys woke me cause they were having a party in their cots. So I came to the kitchen with the monitor and waited. Dominic dropped off half an hour later but Sebastian was awake till 4. At 6:30 Dominic woke me by crying out and though both boys slept on till 7:30, I couldn't any more. So yeah, got about 3 to 4 hours sleep. How like the baby days this feels! I am knackered! I would like to post more but my little velcro-Sebastian is not happy on his own again. So hopefully post more during their nap after lunch!
Sorry I am such a bad poster lately! xx

 

[Storm1jet2]

Morning Angel - my night wasn't too bad in comparison to yours - 2 bottles of milk before bed (shes been on full cows milk all week and she LOVES IT), more milk at 11.30 and crying mummy mummy mummy at 4, I eventually got back to sleep about 5.30 and she was saying 'milk?' at 6.15.. no milk missy you had 4 bottles! she then fell back to sleep and I had to wake her to get her dressed and ready for nursery (DH was on night shift) - apart from that the new baby wakes me sporadically with its night time shennanigans so its like being tortured by a tag team!

In other news one more sleep til pink or blue (obviously the babys general health and well being comes first but there will be no more wondering if its a girl or a boy) - well as long as the hospital decides to tell me, I'm going to book a private scan if they refuse.. I'm now obsessed with knowing! If its a girl I want to get all Lydias clothes washed and ready and if its a boy they can all go to charity I wonder if I will sleep tonight worrying if everything is ok???

 

[charlie15]

Angel, sorry you had such a bad nights sleep last night i also haven't been sleeping well even though OH has slept in bed in Sophias room and I had the bed to myself. I blame jet lag (still!) and this cold but I think even I got more sleep than you, it sucks

Storm, thanks, it is reassuring to know that it gets easier. I think better communication will help OH massively as he struggles more than me with figuring out what Sophia is wanting. I think with time it'll get easier for him and he'll probably enjoy it, well I hope so. I am going to visit this Montessori on Monday and we'll see how we go.

Wooo scan tomorrow! why do you think they might not tell you the gender? Did they last time? I never found out, but I knew I was having a girl! I know some hospitals have a policy of not telling the gender but I though that was more in areas where certain cultures had a preference for one gender?

I think Sophia is getting over the worst of her bug, less snotty and the cough is much better than before Her latest trick is climbing up the stairs, she goes to the safety gate at the top of the stairs, calls 'ima', which is me! I take her down to the bottom and she clambers up and a fair old rate too! Where we stayed while away we had no stairs, so this is a new thing for this little climber. Also with the climbing theme, she has discovered what a great climbing frame I am. While clambering over me, she has also discovered my less that firm tummy, which gives her great pleasure to slap as it makes a great slapping noise! and attempt to give me raspberries! Very cute

Hope everyone else is well, it's gone very quiet here at the moment x

 

[kosh]

will try to reply properly later but for now:

I think Sophia is getting over the worst of her bug, less snotty and the cough is much better than before Her latest trick is climbing up the stairs, she goes to the safety gate at the top of the stairs, calls 'ima', which is me! I take her down to the bottom and she clambers up and a fair old rate too! Where we stayed while away we had no stairs, so this is a new thing for this little climber. Also with the climbing theme, she has discovered what a great climbing frame I am. While clambering over me, she has also discovered my less that firm tummy, which gives her great pleasure to slap as it makes a great slapping noise! and attempt to give me raspberries! Very cute
Hope everyone else is well, it's gone very quiet here at the moment x

Gael does exactly the same when we are on the metro!!
he also pulls my top, looks inside and shouts 'teta, teta' (boobie)
again:

 

[Storm1jet2]

Aha Charlie you too have been blessed with a climber - enjoy - they get more and more adventurous! As for them not telling me some hospitals over here do and others don't, I went to the Royal Jubilee in Belfast last time but had such a horrible time on the ward I didn't want to go back, that and my friend is a mw there and she begged me to choose a different hospital as she said its getting worse and worse.. so I'm off to Antrim hospital this time - ironically where my mum died but she was in their specialist cancer unit so it won't be the same part of the hospital. I think they will tell but I guess I will find out tomorrow!

Oh Kosh that is funny, L is obsessed with boobies (she wasnt breast fed) and now mine are getting firmer she likes to put her hands down my top and squeeze - lol - what do you do! She also is obsessed with trying to pull down your trousers to look at your 'bum'.. shes a monkey!

Hello to everyone else - hope you are all ok and your LOs