any other over 35 first time mums?

[Leeze]

Seoj, I really relate to what you're saying about your LO. It took us 14 months of TTC and now she's here it totally feels like she was the one we were waiting for. Her little smiles and giggles melt my heart and I love her so much. I also feel like I'm now mature enough to give her what she needs. I'm so excited about seeing her grow and develop and her little personality shining through even more! Xx

 

[SKATERBUN]

Me, i am 38 now, had my first at 36 and second just a couple of months ago, both conceived without trying I wasnt a career woman just in the wrong relationship throughout my 20's and early 30's. Its still a struggle financially and I wouldnt say I have less energy than i did 15 years ago for example but more like my life is starting again they definitely make you feel young again. I am glad I did what I had to do earlier like travelling etc and now I can settle and be a mum, am looking forward to when they get older so I can teach them more about life

 

[phoebe]

Hi i am a first time mum at the grand old age old 39, will be 40 next month. I had my DD by emcs due to my induction failing. I am a type 2 diabetic, so was closely monitored through out pg. But that aside i love it!!! DD was 9lb 12oz at birth so i am pretty glad i had the sun roof option now I would to have another, but its finding the time ttc. Anyway just thought i'd say hi and that its a fab idea to have this thread going post birth. I wish all u lovely ladies well and that i will get to know u all in time. Well thats if u are willing to have me tag along c

 

[cissyhope]

Hello all

Leeze hi I really hope you are right about it being easier starting wonder how im gonna manage .I know what you mean about not wanting to leave Lo with any one.I had to go back to work quite early and am lucky enough to leave him with my aunty but even that was so hard in the beginning! x

Moti and snowflakes,what can i say im so sorry for your loss of your little angels.I had a mc at 6 weeks and it was a awful time so cant even begin to imagine your heartbreak.Im so glad your lovely girls x oh snowflakes,u really do look in your 20s!

Ali girl My Lo was feeding constantly,had no time for any thing else but although it feels for ever,it does get better xxx

Really like this thread but i want to be on more! so sorry to have missed some people but want to say hi to every one and hope to chat more xxx

 

[lolastar]

Hi I'm 40 this year, had my son 8 weeks ago. Left my abusive partner when I was 10 weeks pregnant, developed diabetes during pregnancy, was homeless for a spell. Am pretty much on my own with not much support, some days are really hard and I do find I am questioning my ability to be a good mum.. but I am soo lucky to have my beautiful son. I still miss being pregnant, but that guess that will pass lol. Nice to meet you all!

 

[creatingpeace]

Sorry lolastar it has been so rough for you! Big hugs

 

[Gia7777]

Me! Im 41, and after 8 years of trying to conceive, Dh and I 'gave up' when I turned 40.....6 months later our LO was conceived!

 

[Kiki09]

It's lovely reading everyone's stories, so nice to see there are a fair few of us "oldies" lol

Lolastar, it shows you are a good mum already by leaving an abusive relationship when you were pregnant, already looking out for you and your lo...do you have any under ones groups near you, ours is lovely and I have met some great friends there or we also have a local Facebook page for mothers and again that is a great support as all mums are local...

 

[kosh]

Hi I'm 40 this year, had my son 8 weeks ago. Left my abusive partner when I was 10 weeks pregnant, developed diabetes during pregnancy, was homeless for a spell. Am pretty much on my own with not much support, some days are really hard and I do find I am questioning my ability to be a good mum.. but I am soo lucky to have my beautiful son. I still miss being pregnant, but that guess that will pass lol. Nice to meet you all!

sorry you have such a rough time, but as PP said leaving your partnetr while pregnant shows how much you cared for your LO already.
hopeyou can find more support,we are here for you!

 

[cissyhope]

Lolastar so sorry you have had a bad time but as the others have said,it shows what a good mum you are by leaving your partner.Its the most amazing job in the world to become a mum but also i find it hard because you do question if you are doing the right thing by your LO but i think thats a good thing,better to question than not at all imho nice to meet you xxx

Gia7777 thats a fab story! so pleased for you! x

Phoebe hi, 9lb 12oz!!! wow that would have hurt eek my lo was only 6lb5oz! however that blumming hurt like mad and i have heard that smaller babies are harder to push out? somthing to do with gravity, not sure if it is true or not but makes me feel better x

Skaterbun hi its still a struggle here financially! thought at my age id have got things sorted! i was better off in my 20s! oh well im rich in
my heart I too am glad that i had done lots of partying and travelling,however i do wish we had started trying for a family earlier as idealy i would have loved 3 kids,its possible now but feel like iv been pregnant for ever! and thats if it happened again? nice to meet you x

big hellos to Leeze,Kosh,creating peace,Kiki09 and any one i missed (sorry if i have,hopefully get used to every ones name) hope every one is having a nice sunday.

phew cant believe iv managed to write such a long post its a really nice day here and i was ment to put the washing on ages ago!

 

[lolastar]

Sorry lolastar it has been so rough for you! Big hugs

Thank you for your thought xx

 

[lolastar]

It's lovely reading everyone's stories, so nice to see there are a fair few of us "oldies" lol

Lolastar, it shows you are a good mum already by leaving an abusive relationship when you were pregnant, already looking out for you and your lo...do you have any under ones groups near you, ours is lovely and I have met some great friends there or we also have a local Facebook page for mothers and again that is a great support as all mums are local...

Thanks Kiki09, I hadn't thought of it that way... There is a mother and baby group but its on pretty early in the day, we are still getting the hang of getting up and out, so working to get there asap as it probably will do us good to meet other mums in our area..

 

[lolastar]

Hi I'm 40 this year, had my son 8 weeks ago. Left my abusive partner when I was 10 weeks pregnant, developed diabetes during pregnancy, was homeless for a spell. Am pretty much on my own with not much support, some days are really hard and I do find I am questioning my ability to be a good mum.. but I am soo lucky to have my beautiful son. I still miss being pregnant, but that guess that will pass lol. Nice to meet you all!

sorry you have such a rough time, but as PP said leaving your partnetr while pregnant shows how much you cared for your LO already.
hopeyou can find more support,we are here for you!

Thanks Kosh! xx

 

[lolastar]

Lolastar so sorry you have had a bad time but as the others have said,it shows what a good mum you are by leaving your partner.Its the most amazing job in the world to become a mum but also i find it hard because you do question if you are doing the right thing by your LO but i think thats a good thing,better to question than not at all imho nice to meet you xxx

Thanks cissyhope, I think as my son was in intensive care for his first few days and I did let his dad visit him, only for him to drink before coming to the hospital, I then cut contact, only to be threatened with " I'll see you in court" makes me wonder if I am depriving my child of his dad, and how to explain when the time comes, why his dad isn't around. That's a long was off but the thought the still there.. I guess one day at a time is the way forward....

 

[Leeze]

Hi everyone. I agree with what the others have said, Lola - well done for getting out of an abusive relationship and protecting yourself and your LO. I can understand why you'd be concerned about whether or not you're depriving your LO from seeing his Dad, but my guess would be that if he maybe got some help and sorted himself out eg didn't drink before coming to see you then maybe you'd see things differently. Ultimately it sounds like he's the one depriving himself of seeing your LO by his behaviour and you're the one taking responsibility for keeping yourself and LO safe. Big hugs, sounds like a really tough situation to be in Hi to everyone else, my brain is a bit pickled at the moment as LO has been quite unsettled this weekend. Look forward to getting to know you all better. Xx

 

[lolastar]

Hi everyone. I agree with what the others have said, Lola - well done for getting out of an abusive relationship and protecting yourself and your LO. I can understand why you'd be concerned about whether or not you're depriving your LO from seeing his Dad, but my guess would be that if he maybe got some help and sorted himself out eg didn't drink before coming to see you then maybe you'd see things differently. Ultimately it sounds like he's the one depriving himself of seeing your LO by his behaviour and you're the one taking responsibility for keeping yourself and LO safe. Big hugs, sounds like a really tough situation to be in Hi to everyone else, my brain is a bit pickled at the moment as LO has been quite unsettled this weekend. Look forward to getting to know you all better. Xx

Thanks Leeze, you are dead right, he only has himself to blame for missing out on his amazing son growing up. I said to time over and over to get help ( he also has a cannabis problem) or to disappear... His lifestyle is clearly more important than his son.... his loss. I really appreciate you all taking time to reply to, it really does help to talk, well type about it!!! Hope your wee one settles down, enjoy your sunday evening xx

 

[kosh]

bump this again

i'm desperate for support ladies
my LO went to bed at 9:30pm and was up at 1am, 3am, 4:30am, 5:30am, 6:30am and 7:30. i fed him each time but i am not sure he was actually hungry every time he woke. i'm so tired i can't think straight. my body is not coping well - my back, waist, knees, wrists, everything aches, plus BFing is still not painfree. i went back to bed crying. i feel so low
i'm worried i'll pass my stress onto LO.


EDIT:
just realised this thread was moved to the 'lounge area'!

 

[Kiki09]

I know how you feel my lo did this from 3.5 months, he went from sleeping through the night to waking up every hour. Initially I did feed him but then realised he was only drinking it because it was offered not because he was thirsty. I instead soothed him back to sleep shhhh him or gave him his dummy, it took just over 4 weeks before he went back to sleeping through the night... There is 4 month sleep regression and I put it down to this,just a little earlier... I know it's hard but your lo will get back to normal... Can you try and nap a little in the day?

 

[Rowan75]

my dd wakes a lot in the night for her dummy - am trying to train her to be able to find it herself and replace it - shes doing pretty well

she has a bad cold this week so im up and down every ten mins - hopefully things will settle when thats gone

 

[kosh]

thanks kiki - so you reckon this might last 4 weeks? i
yes, i think my LO was the same, he drank because i offered, but probably only half of the times he was actually thirsty/hungry. i will try shhh him tonight.
naps? that's luxury! he sleeps (exactly) 45min - get changed, eat something, go to teh bathroom, and he's awake again!