any other over 35 first time mums?

[clio]

Hi everyone. I have tried to post the message below for two or three days now, and keep falling asleep while doing it. You can even see where I fell asleep (sleeping pills) in the middle of a message to Rowan! So, this is where I've gotten so far, and I'm not caught up on the thread in the slightest. Thought it'd be best to finally post this before you think something awful has happened to me:

Thank you so much everyone. You have been incredibly kind, and your words were so comforting. This is an amazing group. And I'm feeling much better.

After an equally incredibly long sleep, I came downstairs, saw Jonah, and my heart melted. And then he made my day: he then walked from the kitchen counter, across the dining room and to the living room, where he finally fell. I just watched in amazement. I think I have a toddler!!!

It's really hard to describe what happened. But it's hard to describe bi-polar anyway. Though I love that quote, SabrinaKat--I had never heard it before. Seven years ago, when it happened with Eric (the not loving him), I didn't know what was going on. This time I knew (plus, there were a lot of other signs) and I also knew we had to do something fast. And Leeze, it wasn't the typical postpartum "I don't love my baby." I've been through that. You know, I guess I should actually say, it's not hard to describe, it's impossible to describe what happened. I'm just glad I'm not in my 20s anymore, trying to navigate this illness with absolutely no compass (and when manic, with absolutely no moral compass). Sure, I had doctors, and a fantastic psychiatrist, but it wasn't actually until I started riding horses at the age of 27 that things finally stabilized.

One of my biggest fears is that J will develop it. Mine was passed down from my maternal Omi (it skipped my mum), and I'm hoping it will skip J, too. But I guess we'll be prepared should it manifest.

SK--I'm IN LOVE with the pictures of F. I've actually cycled through them a number of times. All of the ones with the bowl are my favourites. His face is so incredibly sweet and full of expression. And look how steadily he sits!

Skweek--you look beautiful! And what huge gorgeous bump! I'd be surprised if there's a six pounder in there, like your doctor and the u/s techs say. I say be prepared for an 8 pounder! (Like I know SO much about obstetrics...) I'm sorry your LO is still taking her own sweet time, though. And I can't wait until we have a brand spanking new baby on this thread! And oh, I am in love with your blanket! The colours are perfect and you knit so well (trust me, I can judge neat and even stitching even over the internet).

Rowan--if I may ask, is the PTSD from the car accident? And I wonder about M's pouncing. I really wonder, too, what its supposed to in preparation for

Oh m Maybe because she's practicing how to fly. And then uou' shake your head and==

And, as you can see ^^, here I fell asleep. No idea why I was talking about flying. Or what that last sentence was about in the slightest. But when I woke up and read it, I laughed so hard!

Okay, update, and then I'll go and read everything I've missed. I'm better, but still cautious. We're dealing with the beginnings of mania (called hypo-mania, triggered by lack of sleep), hence why I believed I truly, objectively, didn't love J. I've got complete insomnia, even after taking my sleep aids (and upping them); I'm talking a mile a minute, and the urge to spend is pretty intense. But so far, I've been able to justify my purchases--bread maker (after that first fiasco, we all know why), low sodium cookbook, This is My Duck book, and I'm otherwise trying to control the urge.

Borboleta--J's Downward Dog:

https://farm9.staticflickr.com/8489/8164683183_0c42e31af6_n.jpg

I think T has better form.

POSTING THIS NOW!!!

 

[Leeze]

Great to hear from you, Clio.
Sounds like things have improved for you which is fantastic.
I'm exhausted today after a really bad night so just a quick one from me.
Sabrina and Storm, hope the illnesses pass quickly in your households. Not sure whether having an ill child is worse that being an ill mummy, hope none of you have to suffer both. Skweek, any updates? Thinking of you. The madness and magic of having a newborn is about to descend upon you! Wow.
I finally booked a table at a baby-friendly restaurant for Kia's birthday on Sunday. 9 adults, 2 children and 6 babies. Wow. Fun times! Hugs to all. Xx

 

[Storm1jet2]

Clio welcome back and I LOVE Js downward dog and wow on the walking that boys a fast learner! Keep trying to type toddle ing and stupid phone keeps changing it to fiddling!

Ps I worry about the possibility of passing on being bipolar to L, DHs mum has it and his brother has had some mental health issues but you know what at least we know what to look out for and there are many worse things in life, that said here's hoping the little munchkins don't have to deal with it!

Right better go see if hubby is home now her ladyship of the runny bum is asleep xxx

 

[Borboleta]

Clio: so glad you are feeling better! I was getting worried! We missed your posts too. And I will have to post a picture of thiago's downdog now . Not sure if his is better than J's.

Leeze: cannot imagine how hard it is to take care of a sick baby while you are sick too. Can your oh or some family member help you? Babies always get better sooner than us adults. Hope you feel better. And I can't believe Kia will be one already!!! How exciting! Please post pictures of the party!!! Do you have a theme?

Storm: poor L! I hate this time of the year when the bugs are out to get us!!! Hope she feels better soon.

Sabrina: hope you feel better too!!! My goodness everyone is getting sick and we are just in the beggining of November!!! I am going to take my flu shot tomorrow .

Skeewek: is she here yet? Hope you are at the hospital either having this baby or about to!

 

[Borboleta]

I guess I forgot to talk about thiago . He is doing well. Starting to express his discontent when we stop walking him around the house because our backs are hurting or if I take his toast of his hand because he wants to shove more food in his mouth and is not swollening the food, so big chocking hazard!!

We bought a little bike seat for our bike so he can join us for a bike ride! It is the cutest thing. It goes between the handle and the seat so he can see everything while we pedal. He likes it so far. And he does not complain about his helmet either .
And I had to buy a bath seat for him since he kept wanting to stand while I gave him a bath. Now he is stuck on his seat . Cannot go anywhere. And the nice thing is he likes it! Total success .

That all. Going to teach my class.

 

[SabrinaKat]

a quick message as am running out the door, having had sudafed, cough syrup, etc...

I also worry that Finn will develop some depression, particularly given that I have had problems and that his paternal grandmother has suffered from anxiety/depression as well, but as both of our depressions are compounded by anxiety/worry, I am hoping that the techniques that I learned (and use) from the cognitive behavioural therapy will help both myself and LO (tried with MIL, but she's too set in her ways at the moment)....

Finn waved bye-bye yesterday! and then waved bye-bye to everybody in the shops, etc...whether he will today or not, still very exciting!

will post more, longer, later! bye!!!!!!!!!

ps. might have to get This is my Duck, as LO loves This is My Kitten!

 

[clio]

THERE IS A THIS IS MY KITTEN!?!

I'm so screwed. I'm going to have to cut up my credit cards, and then erase their numbers from my "secret file."

 

[Rowan75]

welcome back clio glad things are starting to feel more under control or at least with a direction

aye ptsd from car crash - im a lot better now I drive and Im an ok passenger - but we dont do motorways unless I can sit in the back and I drive the scenic route to places lol! but thats ok its all about adapting stuff sometimes isnt it

M is soo not interested in the thats not my range..i keep trying her but nope - funny isnt it!

loving the downward dog - think thats what M is starting to do - was going to show her a roly poly yest then remembered Im pg lmao!

Borboleta I used to have a day walking Martha stood up then next day on my knees to balance the pain shes not as obsessed now tho

well dont J on walking woo hoo! Martha is trying her hardest bless her and is wobbly but keeps launching herself at things and yest she was walking up and down the room holding my jeans with one hand

playgroup this am - she was a bit shy - not sure if its cos its been a couple of weeks since we went to one - must make more of an effort!

Leeze and Sabrina hope you feel better soon - hugs x

skweek hoping your having a good safe labour and delivery x

Sabrina - brill re Finn waving! Martha has no idea about it at all lol! what a sociable little boy so cute!

hope Ive not missed anyone

 

[SabrinaKat]

THERE IS A THIS IS MY KITTEN!?!

I'm so screwed. I'm going to have to cut up my credit cards, and then erase their numbers from my "secret file."

oh, yes -- and it's mine, LOs and dare I say, the two cats' favourite book!

(the This is my Duck seems to be out of stock at the moment via Usborne, but the below book is available (with all its meows!)

best wishes

 

[Storm1jet2]

We have a touchy feely kittens book where there are lots of little fur patches on the kittens to feel,cuts L favourite, must post a photo!

 

[clio]

Well, I ordered a low sodium cookbook from amazon, and needed something more to get the free shipping, so I added the duck book (but I wanted the duck book, anyway. It was just a nice excuse.) But to now hear that there is a KITTEN book!!!

Well, the only two animal words he knows are cat and duck, so I probably should aim for something new, like DOG, or something. That is, if this family weren't philosophically against dogs... winkwink: Storm!)

Rowan--what books is M into? Was it you who put the link to a tractor book, or something? Or was that Leeze? I've created this wish list on amazon. In lieu of actually buying the books the books myself, I'm sending the link onto my mother. I'm hoping she'll be so overwhelmed by her love for her grandson that she'll buy me--oops, I mean HIM--some of the books on it.

Though things are improving. He's currently over at the place we keep the books (it's a magazine rack thingy, and they're jammed in there), and he's trying to pull them out. He managed to pull out a number of them--getting them out seems to part of the fun--and is now chewing on some. Progress!

Plus, yesterday, I stood the books up all over the room and had a Sandra Boynton one (Moo, Baa, La La La) open to a page with a horse and a duck. He actually squealed! He was squealing at a duck I had copied out for him the day before. You see, we have the Sandra Boynton CDs and play them all day long, everyday, and I thought that maybe he should see what animals go with the songs. So I copied a Boynton duck for "Like a Duck" (one of my personal favourites), and he recognized it! Or, he liked the horse. Who knows, really?

Skweek--are you in labour yet?

Rowan (again)--the launching is exactly what J was doing just before taking our hands and then one hand and then no hands. Since she has covered all the others, the no hands is probably next! (Man, that didn't even make sense to me...)

Borboleta--T sounds remarkably close to getting there as well. It's like this drive, isn't it? I WILL WALK. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.

Leeze--what day exactly is K's birthday? And I hope you feel better soon!

SK--I really hope you're feeling better as well. It sounds horrible, your cold. If I were on your meds right now, I'd be a walking around like a zombie. I would occasionally have to take Sudafed if I had to lecture, and be completely out of it. I would explain to my class that I had something called "Sudafed Head" and to excuse me. They thought it was hilarious because I would go off on these weird tangents about how boring it must have been to be a fur trader out in the wild and how I would have spent my time drunk in a canoe in the middle of a lake with a handsome Cree lad, screw the beaver furs... (And I'm really not making this up. This was an actual addition to my lecture on the Northwest.)

J is currently practicing his walking. His aim is pretty sad right now, and I just saw him walk sideways across the room as if he were in a chorus line (a hold over from his cruising days, I guess. His cruising days being, well, yesterday...)

OH! Since I'm currently ignoring him (I just woke up, and want to write this, and if I catch his eye, that's it for independent play), I just heard him running across the kitchen! Smart boy, he's figured out that speed, although not wise, makes it harder to ... crap, he just fell. Excuse me!

 

[clio]

Okay, he was okay. Unfortunately, I then had to make eye-contact, so I fed him his oatmeal. He's gotten a lot better with the utensils and now actually puts the business end of the spoon and fork in his mouth (BIG improvement).

I've been sent upstairs for a nap (new protocol), so if I start to write gibberish, you know what's going on...

Okay, I need some help from you TWs. J is nearly 11 months cry. When you give your LOs porridge in the morning, how much is in the packet? And when you feed them lunch, do you ever give them pre-packaged things like this:

https://www.nestle-baby.ca/Template...ods/toddler_meals/index.htm&NRCACHEHINT=Guest

While I'm trying to do a lot on my own, I need things that would be easy to do every once in a while (read: basically every day for one meal), but I don't know if this stuff is the stage I should be looking at. Everything else is basically soup in every brand's TW "schedule", so this is the closest I could find to what he normally eats. Is there any organic stuff I can look into? (I don't know if we have the same stuff over here, but I can always try. Or see what our equivalent is.) Do you have any other suggestions?

Though my bread maker arrived! And did I tell you that my crockpot experiment worked? I made this chicken and apple concoction, and by the end of the six hours, the chicken was so delightfully uber-tender! Very helpful for a baby without any (useful) teeth. And then I froze the rest, so there are some dinners covered...

Okay, falling asleep. Expect more long, rambling posts from me; I missed a lot in the past few days, and, as I said, writing soothes me. Always feel free to ignore at least 3/4ths of my posts.

 

[SabrinaKat]

clio -- I give 1/2 of a small jar of porridge (the small jar is 125g); I was told by HV (public health nurse) to aim for 12 spoonfuls (small spoonfuls, like demitasse spoons) for each meal; so he gets 1/2 jar of porridge, 1/2 jar of lunch and 1/2 jar for dinner (the creche makes fresh porridge and lunch, but it's about 12-15 spoonfuls per meal). I also give LO 5-6 bottles a day, usually he drinks about 4 oz/120ml or 600-700ml a day. When he went for his assessment on Tuesday, I said all the above and she/another nurse, said that it seemed fine. Finn is somewhat lanky (so was his daddy), so they weren't worried that he was (to me) skinny, but you all have seen the pictures and in the creche, they are happy with his size and weight....

I am going to start making proper dinners, tho and try to freeze and defrost, so LO will start eating with us/our diet, etc. as am feeling properly guilty for using jars -- not from you guys, but everybody here in Ireland (growl!) and it is better that way anyway -- it will force ME to eat better.

skweek - am hoping 'silence' means baby is on their way!

sorry if I didn't mention others, am sudafeded-up (which is not a real word, I do know!) and grumpier than usual. so must go and play with LO and try not to let OH annoy me (e.g. I could help out more and do HIS dishes, yep, aside from all baby-related cleaning, I love to do OH's laundry, dishes, etc. because as we know, working half-days means party time, watching soaps and eating bon-bons all afternoon......ha!)

bye!!!!!!!

 

[Storm1jet2]

Evening ladies, I use a mixture of jars and homemade food. SK don't let anyone make you feel guilty fo r using jars, you do what works for you at the time. Sometimes I cook for ages and then L point blank refuses to eat it, soul destroying! Also what she will eat varies from day today! Yesterday she ate banana and toast, today it was pure poison, yesterday she ate baby pasta today no way... Sigh.... I know she is off colour at the minute but its so frustrating. Oh and we have a new trick, spitting our bottle out.... Arggghhhhhhhhhh

Skweek, thinking about you and hoping your baby is here!

Too tired to type more on phone, night all!

 

[AngelUK]

Too hungry and too tired to do all the personals in detail but wanted to pop in and say a few things.

Borboleta I love the idea of the little bike seat for T! Please post a pic?!

Leeze hope you feel better soon!

Yay welcome back clio. Glad you are feeling better. LOOVE the pic of the downward dog position lol!

Also, I am hoping Skweek you have your baby now Cannot wait to see piccies

Sabrina hope you feel better soon too you poor sudafeded thing! (Love the word and will adopt ). Yay for Finn waving! Did you practise it with him and do you think my boys are too young? Would love that so much!
We use jars and pouches too and I don't feel very guilty as I am a rubbish cook and use my not wanting to poison my boys as an excuse to not cook . And anyway, in this house OH is the cook but I would have to explain everything in detail to him before he would venture to prepare something for them. He never reads up on anything baby related but waits for me to research and then impart the wisdom. Naturally, half the time he then proceeds to listen only with half an ear. Btw he dares complain that I repeat stuff so often and that I ask and tell him the same thing ten times a day just with slightly different word choices. Well, doh!
But yeah once the boys can eat the food we have, things will change for us too I am sure

Hmm food is still not ready so I am going to add this:
I had a bit of a scary moment today. I bought rice cakes for the boys. They are specially for babies and are meant to be fingerfood from 7 months on. Sebastian was quite eager and held it and licked and sucked it. Next moment he had put the whole rice cake in his mouth and was choking! I had to dig it out of there and it came with lots of bile so it really made him almost throw up, poor baby! Not giving that again! How scary weaning is!

 

[Storm1jet2]

Oh not nice angel, L loves those rice cakes now, but she's older and has 6 teeth, that said I'm so used to her vomiting and choking and I don't panic anymore, well not much xxx

 

[Leeze]

Hi all. Thanks for your well wishes but we're not actually ill. I dunno if I said something confusing in my sleep-deprived state.it's lovely to feel cared for though. Loving the idea of getting This is My Kitten. I've seen it and This is my Puppy cheaply on ebay second-hand so I might have to get them too. Kia is suddenly going through a phase where she's not that interested in books and wants to climb off the bed and chase the cat round or play with the vacuum cleaner or re-arrange the CDs onto the floor etc. Tiring but cute. She banged her mouth earlier on one of her attempts to launch herself off the bed. I've tried to teach her how to do it safely but sometimes she's so excited she launches herself off the bed. Her birthday is on Sunday. Am trying to get excited but it's all very hectic here with impending house move and trying to rent out my flat and get ready for Kia to start nursery and me to go back to work. Sorry, this seems like a selfish post as I haven't done any personals. Love to all the Mummies and babies. Will try post personals soon xx

 

[clio]

Leeze-ach, don't worry about personals. Sometimes just having a conversation about things (i.e. food, right now) is nice. Though I know trying to get them to safely get down from things can be frustrating. The number of times I've made J turn around to go down feet first, and he STILL insists on going head-first...

So I tried giving J a pre-packaged meal this evening (I'm really tired). It was some sort of organic mashed potato turkey and corn concoction for 12+. It was, in reality, tons of (grey) mashed potato and a tiny tiny bit of turkey and corn. He first refused to eat it in his bowl with his spoon, so I dumped it out onto his plastic mat (I've duct taped it to the table so he can't get it off) and took away his utensils. He then promptly plopped his face in the goop, and made "woo-woo-woo" sounds. After that, he sat up, took his hands and arms and banged them around in the mush, and then he smeared the mashed potatoes around and around and around the plastic place mat until it covered every inch of it. And, for the grand finale of this piece of performance art, he tried to hug me.

I am currently curled up on the couch, trying to not sob into a pillow. OH put him to bed and is gallantly cleaning up J's hard work right now. Ah, I hear him with the mop...

This would be hilarious if I weren't so tired... All I wanted was a break from cooking...

 

[Borboleta]

Clio: too funny the story about the pre- packaged meal !!! And your husband cleaning . Love it.

Angel: scary about the rice cakes!!! Not sure what that is but it sounds scary!! Thiago likes this hard baby toast and he gets so mad at me when I try to save him from chocking on a big piece!! And yes I will try to post the bike picture and Clio the downdog too.

Storm: so sorry for L being a picky eater. Kids have their own mind don't they!!!

Leeze: happy birthday Kia!!! I am sure you will enjoy the party leeze once is all set and done!

Sabrina: hope sudafed is doing the job for you! I just got my flu shot today. Hope I don't get sick this year! Last year I did good right until 1 week before thiago arrived ! Then I had this terrible thick cough left from the cold while hadpving to deal with a csection and the doctor that signed my papers leads charge me had the guts to tell me that I was a smoker because I was asking him to give me some cough meds. I was sooo mad at him!! He was a terrible doctor!!! Missed my obgyn! And now he is retired.

Night night ladies.

Skeewek I sense the baby is here!!!

Kosh : hope you and Gael and doing well.

 

[Storm1jet2]

Oh Clio, poor you! I find L prefers the Ellas kitchen pouches which she can feed herself, but they are all rather gloopy and if J is used to finger food he probably hates the texture.


Breakfast is becoming a huge struggle for us,vporrudge gets spat out followed by a raspberry so this am was less than half a kiwi and a few cheerios, it worries me her lack of eating and she's dropped
weight since she started cruising round the furniture, she literally doesn't stop! We had a terrible night let night, crying every 20ish minutes.... I'm shattered, hubby was due home 2 hours ago but got stuck on a late call and I'm due at a work lunch in just over an hour with a tired grumpy baby.... Sigh...