Anyone TTC #1 and 30 or older?

[KatO79]

Welcome, Mrs. Tigger! Are you temping or using opks? I find that temping, once you get to know your normal highs and lows, is the best way to definitely tell if you've O'd or not.

Kat- Sometimes Dr offices here have small labs in them that employ Med Techs, so that's why I asked about it. I sure hope you can find something! Its a shame to waste a degree like that Thank goodness your husband has your back financially in the meantime!

Ok don't think they have labs in doctor's offices here. They have huge separate labs situated all around that they refer people to. Unfortunately I think my Master's degree is considered obsolete after almost 8 years of not using it. Don't think they'll see it as economically viable to train someone pushing 40 and they'd probably rather hire a 25 year old instead who will potentially work for them for more years than I will if you understand my meaning. So unfortunately I think that ship has sailed I'm most likely going to just drop it and find a volunteer job at a shelter after I have my baby and he/she is a bit older. Think I'd like to work with animals as I really love animals.

 

[cutestuff]

Kat that sounds great. I sometimes wish I could volunteer, but I have to spend a lot of time working so I don't get free time. I have decided to try and focus on other things this month than ttc. I want to plan something stupid for a few months from now that I would have to avoid if pregnant but I don't know what.... I have no imagination.......

 

[Praying4BB]

I want to plan something stupid for a few months from now that I would have to avoid if pregnant but I don't know what.... I have no imagination.......

Cutestuff- Not sure if it's your thing, but what about something physically demanding, like a race or trek, something that you can train for and keep your mind off TTC from now until then? The good thing about that, you wouldn't necessarily have to avoid it if you became pregnant! But I know what you mean. I just committed to a triathlon in April. I haven't done one in years, but I feel like putting it on the calendar will speed this process along I know as soon as I pay the money to do it, I will get pregnant and won't get to do it, def not taking the chance of a spill on the bike. If I'm not pregnant, I will be in much better shape by then and will get to do something fun with my DH! Win-win

Last month, I planned our trip to Hawai'i over Christmas to keep my mind off TTC and DH being gone. We are planning to hike and camp on the Kalalau trail, and I'm going to teach DH to surf... the latter I definitely will avoid if pregnant, haven't decided what to do about the trek if this is our month. Either way though, win-win

PS- DH comes home in 36 hours. I haven't even spoken to him in a month. This is me---> Went to see the esthetician today getting ready to

 

[zen108]

Hi lovely ladies! I am OUT! Big dip in temp and spotting and now more red CM. AF is on her way.

I was hoping it's implantatation bleeding and implantation dip but am I trying to kid?

We did everything right this month and still misses the egg. I am starting to feel DH and I are doomed not to be parents ever.

I truly believe in God. So maybe we are not ready yet.

Hope there's a BFP news or 2 in this thread soon! Good luck ladies!

 

[Praying4BB]

Hi lovely ladies! I am OUT! Big dip in temp and spotting and now more red CM. AF is on her way.

I was hoping it's implantatation bleeding and implantation dip but am I trying to kid?

We did everything right this month and still misses the egg. I am starting to feel DH and I are doomed not to be parents ever.

I truly believe in God. So maybe we are not ready yet.

Hope there's a BFP news or 2 in this thread soon! Good luck ladies!

So sorry to hear that Zen

 

[dede3124]

Hate the 'doomed feeling'! Fight the 'doomed feeling'!

 

[Hollynesss]

I'm so sorry, Zen! We all understand that feeling all too well I hope we get some good luck up in here sometime soon as well!

 

[zen108]

Thanks dede, praying, holly. Yes, i do hope you ladies get a BFP soon. This month we used preseed, more OPKs and temp. Still not good enough. Wondering big time what's else could be wrong. I really don't want to go back to the fertility clinic because my doc is pushing for IUI, which we can't afford now. We still want to TTC naturally.

Maybe too stress this month? But I really don't understand what it means by 'relax and it will happen' when there's temping to do, OPK to test and supplements to eat. So envy those who just 'accidentally' had a baby.

Oh dear, DH saw me typing away on my iPad and asked what happened and I said AF came and broke down. Shucks!

Ok, enough of sorrow. Moving on and praying really hard for a miracle.

 

[MJsBabyShaw]

Oh, Zen....I'm so sorry. I was just complaining to DH this morning that we've been timing everything perfectly all 6 cycles that we tried after my miscarriage - and nothing! It's very frustrating to not have control over something that we all want so badly. It sounds like you have the right attitude, though....it's okay to be sad, but it's even better to move on and have hope that it will happen eventually.

I think what they mean by "relax and it will happen" - that we should literally ignore our cycles and just have sex when we feel like it....absurd, right?? The logical person in me thinks "we have to pay attention to when we ovulate so that the sperm is in the right place at the right time!". But then another part of me just wants my old life back....just enjoying DH when we felt like it and not a care in the world when/if AF came on time.

 

[MJsBabyShaw]

I want to plan something stupid for a few months from now that I would have to avoid if pregnant but I don't know what.... I have no imagination.......

Cutestuff- Not sure if it's your thing, but what about something physically demanding, like a race or trek, something that you can train for and keep your mind off TTC from now until then? The good thing about that, you wouldn't necessarily have to avoid it if you became pregnant! But I know what you mean. I just committed to a triathlon in April. I haven't done one in years, but I feel like putting it on the calendar will speed this process along I know as soon as I pay the money to do it, I will get pregnant and won't get to do it, def not taking the chance of a spill on the bike. If I'm not pregnant, I will be in much better shape by then and will get to do something fun with my DH! Win-win

Last month, I planned our trip to Hawai'i over Christmas to keep my mind off TTC and DH being gone. We are planning to hike and camp on the Kalalau trail, and I'm going to teach DH to surf... the latter I definitely will avoid if pregnant, haven't decided what to do about the trek if this is our month. Either way though, win-win

PS- DH comes home in 36 hours. I haven't even spoken to him in a month. This is me---> Went to see the esthetician today getting ready to

Praying, I LOVE the idea of training for something to keep the mind off of TTC and the body healthy! Great plan.

Have fun tonight with DH! I love that bunny - it cracks me up every time!

 

[crystlmcd]

So sorry, Zen! I hope you get your BFP soon.

 

[zen108]

Oh, Zen....I'm so sorry. I was just complaining to DH this morning that we've been timing everything perfectly all 6 cycles that we tried after my miscarriage - and nothing! It's very frustrating to not have control over something that we all want so badly. It sounds like you have the right attitude, though....it's okay to be sad, but it's even better to move on and have hope that it will happen eventually.

I think what they mean by "relax and it will happen" - that we should literally ignore our cycles and just have sex when we feel like it....absurd, right?? The logical person in me thinks "we have to pay attention to when we ovulate so that the sperm is in the right place at the right time!". But then another part of me just wants my old life back....just enjoying DH when we felt like it and not a care in the world when/if AF came on time.

Thanks MJ. Yeah, I have the same thought as you. But then again, our clock is ticking. We can't afford that much time to hang around and 'relax' to make it happen although I do want to just give up all these and just let it happen like it did the first time.

 

[MJsBabyShaw]

Oh, Zen....I'm so sorry. I was just complaining to DH this morning that we've been timing everything perfectly all 6 cycles that we tried after my miscarriage - and nothing! It's very frustrating to not have control over something that we all want so badly. It sounds like you have the right attitude, though....it's okay to be sad, but it's even better to move on and have hope that it will happen eventually.

I think what they mean by "relax and it will happen" - that we should literally ignore our cycles and just have sex when we feel like it....absurd, right?? The logical person in me thinks "we have to pay attention to when we ovulate so that the sperm is in the right place at the right time!". But then another part of me just wants my old life back....just enjoying DH when we felt like it and not a care in the world when/if AF came on time.

Thanks MJ. Yeah, I have the same thought as you. But then again, our clock is ticking. We can't afford that much time to hang around and 'relax' to make it happen although I do want to just give up all these and just let it happen like it did the first time.

Just curious...how long did it take to get pregnant the first time? I keep telling myself....it happened once, it can happen again. Though it might not happen until I'm 36! I just don't know if I want DH to be that old when we have our first....if I got pregnant at 36 DH would be 42 when I had the baby....but I guess there isn't too much difference between 40 & 42

 

[zen108]

The first was truly unexpected though we were not preventing.

We were living separately in 2 different countries for a year right after marriage. On our 2nd yr of marriage, we have finally agreed to settle down in my country. So, on the month that I conceived, I went to meet him up to help him with the process of migrating. And bang! I remembered very well that we only BD-ed 3 times when I was there for only a week. I didn't know exactly when I had O'd.

Unfortunately, a month after we finally settled, I miscarried. And since then, my body is wacky. Hormones became crazy. And now that we are together, we can't get pregnant. Weird. It's either a cruel joke by someone up there, or it's just not our time yet.

But when is our time?

 

[Hollynesss]

Praying- which island are you going to? We spent two weeks in Hawaii for our honeymoon, and I didn't want to leave! We visited Oahu and the Big Island. It was glorious!!

 

[Praying4BB]

Praying- which island are you going to? We spent two weeks in Hawaii for our honeymoon, and I didn't want to leave! We visited Oahu and the Big Island. It was glorious!!

Oahu and Kauai! I lived on Oahu for three years so I am really excited to take the hubs on a grand tour!

 

[Praying4BB]

I love that bunny - it cracks me up every time! [/QUOTE

So funny thing... our last name means "bunny" in another language, so we always refer to the future little one as "baby bunny," thus my avatar and name. When I saw the bunny emoticon, we started referring to BD'ing as BBD'ing... baby bunny dancing. It's perfect!

 

[zen108]

Feel so upset now. Want to really cry but promise myself not to. Just found out a friend just got her BFP and here I am with AF. And other friends are congratulating her and telling how they will look after her during her pregnancy. Sigh, different people, different story.

 

[KatO79]

Kat that sounds great. I sometimes wish I could volunteer, but I have to spend a lot of time working so I don't get free time. I have decided to try and focus on other things this month than ttc. I want to plan something stupid for a few months from now that I would have to avoid if pregnant but I don't know what.... I have no imagination.......

Maybe we could trade because I'd really like to have a job and be making some money

Oh, Zen....I'm so sorry. I was just complaining to DH this morning that we've been timing everything perfectly all 6 cycles that we tried after my miscarriage - and nothing! It's very frustrating to not have control over something that we all want so badly. It sounds like you have the right attitude, though....it's okay to be sad, but it's even better to move on and have hope that it will happen eventually.

I think what they mean by "relax and it will happen" - that we should literally ignore our cycles and just have sex when we feel like it....absurd, right?? The logical person in me thinks "we have to pay attention to when we ovulate so that the sperm is in the right place at the right time!". But then another part of me just wants my old life back....just enjoying DH when we felt like it and not a care in the world when/if AF came on time.

Yeah, I feel like DH and I have timed things nicely for 14 of those 15 cycles but only 1 chemical to show for it So since we're so incredibly lucky that IUI is free here (plus 3 free IVF attempts should we need it), we're going to go with getting help. I'm 35, turning 36 in May, and DH is 37, turning 38 in July. So we don't have time to keep trying naturally If I was about mid-20s or even 30-32, I'd probably have been willing to give it 1 more year of trying naturally. But I don't want to be an "old" mother. My mother was 41 when she had me and my father was 53. So want to avoid a similar situation for my child.

Feel so upset now. Want to really cry but promise myself not to. Just found out a friend just got her BFP and here I am with AF. And other friends are congratulating her and telling how they will look after her during her pregnancy. Sigh, different people, different story.

Awww so sorry zen I'd be upset too. If you need to cry and then do it. I don't think bottling up feelings is healthy. Once in a while I'll spare DH and cry by myself just to get it out so I can feel more positive afterwards. Maybe it'll help you?

AFM I think I'm getting more CM because of the extra Vit C Pity it's mostly going to go to waste because of my HSG being on CD11 and we might only have CD12 to BD

I've been watching "Private Practice" for the first time but don't feel like I can watch it anymore as one of the characters (don't want to spoil it for anyone if someone hasn't seen the series yet and wants to) is pregnant and she's complaining about how horrible it is to be pregnant. I know it's a series and one of the other characters had problems conceiving, even after trying IVF (although I think she only tried it once) and ended up adopting. But it just annoys me to see someone, even a fictional character, complaining so much about being pregnant when I've been trying for over 1 year to get my BFP. I know this is probably very silly I can better deal with seeing "Nashville" even though one of the main characters is now pregnant (they wrote her pregnancy into the series).

 

[Mrs. Tigger]

Feel so upset now. Want to really cry but promise myself not to. Just found out a friend just got her BFP and here I am with AF. And other friends are congratulating her and telling how they will look after her during her pregnancy. Sigh, different people, different story.

Those situations are so hard to get through. I never feel so alone as I do when stuff like that happens to me.

In the last year, I had to deal with a woman on my team at work (who reports to me) falling pregnant, and then working with her through her entire pregnancy. I handled it better than I thought I would, but it was still really hard :-\ It's amazing how much pain well-meaning people can cause unintentionally.