Anyone TTC #1 and 30 or older?

[formosa30]

Hey ladies!

I am 30, husband is 33, and this is our 3rd cycle TTC #1.

TTC is hard for everyone, but being at this stage in my life, I feel an added pressure. I have zero regrets waiting this long to TTC. I am in a much better place emotionally and financially than I was in my 20s, and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

However, I can't ignore that nagging fear in the back of my head that the clock is ticking. I'm hoping for a short or even average journey to motherhood![/QUOTES
I feel the same way I'm 31 and my spouse 34 plus here. Is a little inside about or story. Hope this helps that your not alone. And keep positive.

Hello everyone. I'm new to this site and kinda nervous about posting about my miscarriage and what's going on now. But here it goes.....

I found out this past September that I was pregnant with twins but how I found out was the killer. I went to the hospital after passing a large amount of blood and not knowing what was wrong. Since I had regular periods every month and been told by my gyno up north that I can not conceive, being pregnant was far from my mind. Which I might add killed me inside, since all I have ever wanted was children. Well after hours at the hospital and ten billion test it seemed like was being done I found out I was pregnant. Which made me happy and scared all at once. Well long story short I had miscarried at 8wks, had my dnc done on Sep 22nd and had my first cycle on Nov 4th. Been seeing a new gyno down here and she gives me hope by saying the doc I had before was a quack job.lol And that I can conceive. Been doing several test to check my ovulating patterns and to see how fertile I really am. Or if I need injections of clomid. Well here we are in December and I'm four days late. I have taken two pregnancy test and both read negative. Should I be worried or is this normal?

 

[crystlmcd]

Kat - drjo and I are both on CD11 and fleur is on CD14 so we can all be cycle buddies!

 

[Hollynesss]

Welcome, Formosa! I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage I don't know much about D&Cs, but I would imagine it would take your body a few cycles to completely regulate itself. You may have ovulated later this cycle as your body is re-setting. If she doesn't show up in the next week, you could give your doctor a call .

 

[TTCBabySnow]

Hi all,

I'm 33 and my husband will be soon. We are trying for Baby Numero Uno. Been trying since end August (so just over three months). I have a regular 33 day cycle but this month at day 25dpo but just had a :BFN:, . Just waiting for either AF to arrive so can continue trying or a :BFP:. Currently feel in limbo land.

 

[KatO79]

Kat - drjo and I are both on CD11 and fleur is on CD14 so we can all be cycle buddies!

The problem is I'm 10 DPO (not CD10) and will first be CD1 Wednesday or Thursday if it's a bfn so unfortunately we're not synched up either Guess I'm the lone wolf

Welcome formosa30 and TTCBabySnow

Sorry about your miscarriage formosa30 Here's hoping you get a sticky bfp soon

I know what it's like in limbo land TTCBabySnow, most recently was there in August and got AF 5 days late Hope you get an answer soon what's going on.

 

[Hollynesss]

Welcome, TTCBabySnow! It is the WORST when our bodies play tricks on us like that. Either bring on AF or make with the bfp! I hope you get an answer soon

Kat- you are the superstar in the middle

 

[cutestuff]

Welcome femosa and baby sniw. Fermosaic I too dont know much about dncs but I would think it might take a cycle or two to regulate. And I am a lone wolf too. I think I am somewhere between 1 and 8 dpo.....did not keep track....

 

[Fleur828815]

Welcome formosa. So sorry about your loss but it's good that you'e got a more helpful gyno now, and that you know you can conceive. Unfortunately it seems that cycles can be messed up after a miscarriage, so you shouldn't go by your usual cycle length. Did you do any tests to confirm ovulation this month? I also had a D&C in October for a missed miscarriage, got AF 5 weeks later. I should be ovulating around now going by my cycles pre-miscarriage but my OPKs are negative so I guess I'll have to wait and see.

Hi TTCBabySnow. No wonder you feel in limbo if you're getting BFN's at 25dpo when you normally have 33 day cycles. You might have ovulated a few days later this month? Hope you'll get a definite answer either way soon.

Kat and cutestuff, don't worry about being lone wolves, we're all in this together anyway! I'm not a exact cycle buddy, just latching on to whoever hasn't ovulated yet

 

[Mrs. Tigger]

Hi Ladies! Just checking in.

Warning, this post may be TMI!

Still not quite got yet, but I expect soon. I had some spotting (or rather, I don't know if it's called spotting or not -- it was just discharge tinged red/brown when I wiped -- sorry again if TMI!) on Thursday the 4th, then a little more Friday, the 5th. Today (Saturday, the 6th), there's more, and a bit of brown stringy stuff, so I expect AF probably tomorrow. I've never been 100% sure how you count cycle days, or whether what I call 'spotting' is what others call spotting, but I usually assume the first day of "flow" is CD1. That's what I've read, anyway. So, currently on CD42 and but thrilled that this cycle is looking like it will be so much shorter than the last one.

Kat - Depending on when comes on fully for me, my CD1 will probably be tomorrow (Sunday), or Monday, so we seem like we won't be so far off from each other. Hope you get a instead of AF, though.

TTCBabySnow - Yikes! Seems odd to get to 25 DPO without any AF . . . are you sure you ovulated when you think you did? Hope she comes soon so you can get on with it.

 

[crystlmcd]

Oops Kat, I misread your post. Hopefully you'll get your BFP this cycle and then you can start looking for due date buddies!

 

[deafgal01]

If it helps, my dr said to consider it 1cd when it is a flow (not spotting). The other thing I learned- not sure what time exactly but after 6 pm is applied to next day rather than that day being 1cd.

 

[KatO79]

Thanks Mrs. Tigger and crystlmcd Though I'm not very optimistic this cycle but then again, I never am

I forgot to mention that my MIL called DH about what to get me from my list for Christmas and he went into the bedroom. When he came out I asked him if he remembered to tell her to stop with the "just relax" crap. Nope he forgot to tell her I'm debating if I should tell her myself now in a polite email so I can better gather my thoughts

UPDATE: The woman-child is over here now and it ends up she can't study today because she's so upset about this stupid model guy who isn't interested in her (and is a total narcissitic douche by the sound of him) She's obssessed that he should see her new profile picture on FB because then he'd be interested in her because she thinks she looks much hotter in her new pic So not only is this visit a total waste because she won't study but she's driving me nuts with her obssessive questions that I just want to smack her in the head hard with my thick, heavy chemistry book (but of course am resisting the urge) My DH is also being annoying because we agreed we should say we don't have any time after today to help her study and now he's saying maybe 1-2 days we can

I'm just going nuts and am so upset with DH right now Will have a serious talk with him when she leaves

 

[MJsBabyShaw]

Kat, maybe just wait until she brings it up next time and nicely tell her how you feel about the relax comments. It's always most helpful to let people know when the actual action is happening so that they are very clear on what behavior you are talking about.

Welcome new ladies!! Hope you won't be with us long!

I'm cd4 today, AF is pretty much over so we will start trying sometime next week. Hoping for an earlier ovulation this month. We will see....I had one sip of wine on thanksgiving but other than that, haven't had a drop of alcohol since Napa. I really think vacation and drinking pushed my ovulation later because I wasn't stressed at all during Napa. I also didn't have very good CM last month, either. I am drinking a ton of water every day, hoping that it helps in that department!

How's everyone else doing?

 

[dede3124]

Deafgal- I would say we have dtd in many patterns from every other day to every day. My acupuncturist has recommended every other day starting cd 9 or 10 to 20....we haven't been as committed to going through to 20. The last couple cycles we have been more intentional about starting cd 9 or 10, then everyday from positive opk to temp rise. I guess sa will give more info on if we need to stick to every other day....guess I have had it in my head that a 'fresh' supply would be the way to go. As far as lifestyle we aren't perfect but not bad either. I haven't started prenatal vitamins....does that help conceive or is it more just in case you do get bfp?

 

[Hollynesss]

Dede- My doctor told me that it is helpful to start prenatals a few months before TTC and build up the nutrients in your body, and also you will already have started when you get a bfp. They don't necessarily help you to conceive, but the extra nutrients are good for you whether you are pregnant or not.

 

[KatO79]

Dede- My doctor told me that it is helpful to start prenatals a few months before TTC and build up the nutrients in your body, and also you will already have started when you get a bfp. They don't necessarily help you to conceive, but the extra nutrients are good for you whether you are pregnant or not.

Exactly. Although I think some of the vitamins and minerals are good for certain processes in your cycle as well.

The most important is folic acid that prevents spina bifida.

So you should be taking them so they build up in your system and are ready when you do get pregnant.

Kat, maybe just wait until she brings it up next time and nicely tell her how you feel about the relax comments. It's always most helpful to let people know when the actual action is happening so that they are very clear on what behavior you are talking about.

The problem is I'm not always very diplomatic in how I word things when I'm in the moment, especially if it's something that's been irritating me for a long time. I'd also like her to understand that DH backs me up on this and tell her it's a myth and that lots of couples suffer from unexplained infertility and it doesn't mean relaxing is the answer. Also that I'm not so stressed that it would effect my chances. He also knows how to word things so she gets it.

 

[crystlmcd]

Had a big temp drop this morning so I'm thinking I might be O'ing early this cycle. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what my temps do the next few days. If I don't get a BFP this cycle then I won't be doing any temping or anything next cycle since we'll be on vacation and I just want to relax on vacation.

Agree with everyone else on the prenatal vitamin. My doctor said you don't have to switch to them right away when you start TTC but, if you don't, you need to make sure you're taking a daily multivitamin with the right amount of folic acid. I just switched to prenatals even though my normal multivitamin had enough folic acid.

 

[crystlmcd]

The problem is I'm not always very diplomatic in how I word things when I'm in the moment, especially if it's something that's been irritating me for a long time. I'd also like her to understand that DH backs me up on this and tell her it's a myth and that lots of couples suffer from unexplained infertility and it doesn't mean relaxing is the answer. Also that I'm not so stressed that it would effect my chances. He also knows how to word things so she gets it.

Kat - I think an email explaining the situation would be fine. I know, when it comes to complex and sensitive topics, I can sometimes get my feelings out better in writing than in words. It could also save you from a potential confrontation in front of other family members the next time she brings it up (though I can't be sure she won't make remarks about the email - but I hope she won't).

 

[KatO79]

The problem is I'm not always very diplomatic in how I word things when I'm in the moment, especially if it's something that's been irritating me for a long time. I'd also like her to understand that DH backs me up on this and tell her it's a myth and that lots of couples suffer from unexplained infertility and it doesn't mean relaxing is the answer. Also that I'm not so stressed that it would effect my chances. He also knows how to word things so she gets it.

Kat - I think an email explaining the situation would be fine. I know, when it comes to complex and sensitive topics, I can sometimes get my feelings out better in writing than in words. It could also save you from a potential confrontation in front of other family members the next time she brings it up (though I can't be sure she won't make remarks about the email - but I hope she won't).

Yes that would be another concern, that she brings it up in front of other family members. Don't think we'll see her until around the 26th and I'm sure many of DH's family will be there (my mother always refuses to come to family gatherings at anyone from DH's family). So would be a bit awkward if she says something in front of them at the table

Even if she doesn't say it again, she needs to know how hurtful comments like that are to couples experiencing unexplained fertility so she doesn't throw comments like that around if she does meet someone else having problems conceiving. Who knows, if my youngest brother-in-law does decide to have kids, maybe it turns out him and his girlfriend have issues as well and my MIL starts with her relaxing mantra

 

[ireadyermind]

Hello!

Not sure if I count for this thread, since I will be 30 in about 10 days. lol!

But DH and I have just started TTC#1. This is our 2nd month of trying. We would probably have waited even longer to start TTC, maybe another year or so, except for the fact that I was diagnosed with a rare form of cervical cancer in April of this year.

I had surgery in May to remove the cancerous cells, but according to my OB/GYN, they will only keep coming back as long as I have a cervix for them to live in, SO we were told we needed to start TTC now, because as soon as we're done having children, I have to have a hysterectomy.

Still, I'm glad we waited. DH and I were both attending college, both working our butts off trying to make ends meet for the past several years, and only recently have we started getting our heads above water. DH is due for a promotion in January (they've already informed him of it, they're just waiting to do the official paperwork!) and THAT was what we were waiting for. Now DH makes enough by himself to support me and a baby so that I can be a stay at home mom.

Anyway, TTC for me is going to be difficult. I've had a large portion of my cervix removed, so I don't see much CM and my body's reaction to the surgery was to go from cycles that lasted 28 days like clockwork, to cycles that are something like 35 days and change a bit from month to month.

Wish me luck and baby dust! Wouldn't it be AMAZING if I conceived #1 this month!? I'm in my TWW for December and I'm both hoping for my BFP, and hoping NOT to have one, since my birthday and AF are scheduled for the same day this month. Haha