So you guys that have older kids, just out of curiosity - what do you do when they throw tantrums in public? I work at a restaurant so I've seen parents take their kids outside, just let them scream and deafen everyone around, yell at them so they start crying... I've always said if my kid was acting up in public I would definitely leave said public place but I have a feeling it's way different when it actually happens with your kid lol.
I agree 100% with ssjad. It all depends on the situation. I used to think it was so simple...until my child started doing it! Sometimes, he would tantrum because he wanted to leave. So, all leaving would do would be to give him his way and have him think we were giving into a tantrum. So, we started getting creative. If we were all out together, I'd take him to the car where we would sit while my husband continued to shop. Well, he hated that because that's boring. So, it was like a time out. I have left some places if leaving is not what he wants, though. For example, we were in the toy store once and he was acting out about not getting a toy he wanted and we just left. I have also taken toys up at home, which works. Another strategy I tried that really worked was going somewhere without him that he wanted to go because last time he acted out. He LOVES to go to the library, but one visit, he threw himself on the floor over some issue he had. I took him out, told him he knows better than to behave like that, and that I'd be going to the library without him next time. That was like the worst. He knew I did because I went and came back with books without him. Ever since then, he has not once had a tantrum in the library. He always helps and he makes all of the people smile. He puts his old books in the book return, and then gets on a stool to check out his new books himself. And there is a librarian who gives him a "super library helper" sticker every time. It actually really helps to have strangers reward him for good behavior because it makes him feel extra special and want to behave more. But he hasn't had a tantrum in public in a long time. And now he rarely has tantrums at home.
He's also on a behavior sticker chart at home. He gets a sticker every day, but if he has a tantrum, no sticker. He can also earn an extra sticker for being extra helpful--like he helped me put the laundry away yesterday. When he gets 5 in a row, he gets a very special reward. He got to stay up late on Friday night because he got 5 stickers last week.
I keep editing this post because I keep thinking of more things. Another important thing I've found about eliminating tantrums in public (or other unwanted behavior for that matter) is to be consistent. If I say I'm going to do something, I need to do it right away. Otherwise, he won't ever take a warning seriously or he'll keep pushing because there are no clear boundaries. That's probably the teacher in me, too.
We had to keep telling her to think about it. But then both mom and dad were ecstatic. We skyped my sister and told her the news- she was very happy too.
