April fools... false pregnancies.. does it offend you?

[SuperKat]

There is a girl on my facebook ranting off about how it is sick to pretend you are pregnant for April fools... She says it's not fair on ladies trying to get pregnant or have lost a baby ect...

I tried a long time to get pregnant this time and honestly April fools pregnancy pranks do not offend me and I wonder if it would offend ladies here as I know many here were in TTC a while first?

This girl told me last week she thought she was pregnant then said PHEW when she found out she wasnt... to me!! a pregnant lady who took a while to conceive! Surely that's worse?

Thoughts?

I just saw a post floating around on facebook about that. I think it's silly personally- I mean, everyone is entitled to feel as they will, but people do/say much more hurtful things to people having difficulty getting pregnant or that are suffering from a loss. If a person is that sensitive, it would be hard to not offend them somehow, and it seems like it is their job to bubble wrap themselves to prevent themselves from being hurt...in my opinion, that is the sensitive persons issue, not mine. I believe it is important to be sensitive to others feelings, but sometimes you don't know what others are going through- and when it comes to facebook, everyone is entitled to post what they want, that is why they have the "hide post" option...you can block or hide certain people from your newsfeed if they post things that are upsetting.

 

[MustBeMummy]

It does make me angry yeah I think its a horrible think to joke about likd that. Very insensitive.

 

[MustBeMummy]

Would it offend u if someone said oh I have cancer......not really april fools. Stupid thing to joke about in my opinion.

 

[doggylover]

I hardly think you an compare having cancer to being pregnant!! I understand that you dislike the nature of the April fools joke which is your prerogative, but I hardly think that having a life threatening illness and (in most cases) choosing to have a baby are in any way the same thing.

 

[MustBeMummy]

Ok yes maybe a bit different. Shouldnt have used that as an example but do u see my point

 

[MustBeMummy]

Didnt mean to cause any offense and apologise if I did. My grandmother had breast cancer so I dont say it lightly

 

[charbaby]

It's more for the ladies who can't/ struggle to have babies, more than the ones who just chose to have a baby and get caught in a few months, I said on my previous post ladies who have got pregnant in under a year wouldn't understand the pain/upset, every emotion you can think of, that happens when you see a pregnancy update on Facebook if you are happy for them or not it still feels the same.

 

[ukgirl23]

I agree that if you dont like a post you should hide it which is what I did lol but as a lady who had TTC and had a loss ect I personally wasnt offended.. it annoyed me more that people were making such a fuss over the most common joke in april fool history I dont find it funny either I find it a bit predictable.. I would love to wake up to pink grass that sounds more fun...

 

[ukgirl23]

I dont think you can put a time scale on how long you tried can base on how offended you would be either... wether you tried for six months or six years anytime you try for a baby and have to deal with not getting pregnant while others concieve easily around you is hard..

 

[charbaby]

I dont think you can put a time scale on how long you tried can base on how offended you would be either... wether you tried for six months or six years anytime you try for a baby and have to deal with not getting pregnant while others concieve easily around you is hard..

I think you can because it is normal to take up to a year ttc so once you get to that year you know something is usually wrong and you are going to need help. Everyone has there own opinions on this and as a lttcer myself I no how hard it is and the emotions it brings

Plus the longer you are ttc the more harder it is, a lady who ttc for 6 months would be hurt but I imagine a lady that was ttc for 6 years would be absolutly crushed! I know I would have been 2 years was a very long time in my eyes and caused endless amount of hurt and upset during them.

 

[Zfbaby]

I dont think you can put a time scale on how long you tried can base on how offended you would be either... wether you tried for six months or six years anytime you try for a baby and have to deal with not getting pregnant while others concieve easily around you is hard..

I think you can because it is normal to take up to a year ttc so once you get to that year you know something is usually wrong and you are going to need help. Everyone has there own opinions on this and as a lttcer myself I no how hard it is and the emotions it brings

Plus the longer you are ttc the more harder it is, a lady who ttc for 6 months would be hurt but I imagine a lady that was ttc for 6 years would be absolutly crushed! I know I would have been 2 years was a very long time in my eyes and caused endless amount of hurt and upset during them.

Totally agree charbaby!
Yes you can put a time frame on it, not saying there is a competition for who is more hurt by these posts or anything like that but you can not compare how it feels to wait 6mnths for your baby with 6 years and endless treatments and uncertainty etc. you just can't. The problem with these posts is that for women who are struggling it trivialises their problems which are just as valid as any other illness whether terminal or not.
I know it's upsetting when you want a baby and can't seem to fall pregnant, a good friend of mine is stressed because its taken her 5 months and she's still not pregnant again but we still both recognise that it's nothing compared to the nightmare of waiting 5 years as we did. It was heartbreaking, physically draining, financially draining and we lived in constant fear. Seeing fake pregnancy posts during that would easily tip the balance.

 

[katy1310]

I think it's a silly and pointless joke because it can hurt so many people. Imagine if you have just had a miscarriage or stillbirth, or been told that you can never have children. Imagine if you have been trying for a long, long time and it seems like everyone around you is getting pregnant except you. In my opinion, it's just a stupid joke.

DH and I are desperate for another baby, but I had my LO at 27 weeks due to severe pre eclampsia and I was only one hour from organ failure, and we are not sure if we dare try again or not. I struggle every time I see another real pregnancy announced on FB, let alone a fake one.

 

[tristansmum]

I don't find it offensive just a bit stupid and sad really

 

[doggylover]

I dont think you can put a time scale on how long you tried can base on how offended you would be either... wether you tried for six months or six years anytime you try for a baby and have to deal with not getting pregnant while others concieve easily around you is hard..

I think you can because it is normal to take up to a year ttc so once you get to that year you know something is usually wrong and you are going to need help. Everyone has there own opinions on this and as a lttcer myself I no how hard it is and the emotions it brings

Plus the longer you are ttc the more harder it is, a lady who ttc for 6 months would be hurt but I imagine a lady that was ttc for 6 years would be absolutly crushed! I know I would have been 2 years was a very long time in my eyes and caused endless amount of hurt and upset during them.

Totally agree charbaby!
Yes you can put a time frame on it, not saying there is a competition for who is more hurt by these posts or anything like that but you can not compare how it feels to wait 6mnths for your baby with 6 years and endless treatments and uncertainty etc. you just can't. The problem with these posts is that for women who are struggling it trivialises their problems which are just as valid as any other illness whether terminal or not.
I know it's upsetting when you want a baby and can't seem to fall pregnant, a good friend of mine is stressed because its taken her 5 months and she's still not pregnant again but we still both recognise that it's nothing compared to the nightmare of waiting 5 years as we did. It was heartbreaking, physically draining, financially draining and we lived in constant fear. Seeing fake pregnancy posts during that would easily tip the balance.

I'm going to have to agree with ukgirl on this one. To say that you can't compare how it feels to wait 6 months and 6 years is not very fair. How people feel is a personal thing, and someone could be struggling emotionally after 6 months in the same way as someone who has been ltttc. You can't put a timescale on people's feelings IMO.

 

[Tasha]

I'm going to have to agree with ukgirl on this one. To say that you can't compare how it feels to wait 6 months and 6 years is not very fair. How people feel is a personal thing, and someone could be struggling emotionally after 6 months in the same way as someone who has been ltttc. You can't put a timescale on people's feelings IMO.

I dont think people are saying it is not difficult to TTC for six months, however it is classed as normal whereas trying for one, two, five, ten years is medically classed as not not normal and that brings about extra emotions. As well as the fact of the longer you try the further from your reach it feels.

 

[doggylover]

I am totally aware of that - I struggled to conceive this LO and had a loss along the way so I am no stranger to the extra emotions ltttc brings. But at the same time I still don't think it's fair to say that just because its classed as medically 'normal' to be ttc for six months doesn't mean a woman isn't entitled to the same emotions as someone who has been ttc for years.

Just my opinion

 

[Babybear85]

I was trying for 2 years for my first and honestly this would not bother me. I wanted my baby not theirs so tbh whether they were pregnant or not had no bearing on how I felt

 

[jozylynn896]

I don't find that offensive. What would be offensive is if they faked a miscarriage or death or something. Thay would be pathetic and offensiv.

I'm 39 weeks tomorrow and told my oh i think i may be pregnant lol.

 

[charbaby]

I am totally aware of that - I struggled to conceive this LO and had a loss along the way so I am no stranger to the extra emotions ltttc brings. But at the same time I still don't think it's fair to say that just because its classed as medically 'normal' to be ttc for six months doesn't mean a woman isn't entitled to the same emotions as someone who has been ttc for years.

Just my opinion

I never said it means women are not entitled to feel emotions towards not getting pregnant just that the longer you are ttc the harder it is, I know at 6 months ttc it was really hard for me but at 1 year it was even harder and by 18 months felt like it was never going to happen, so as for 6 months being the same as 6 years this statement is just totally wrong and I am sure if anyone ask a lttcer of 6 years they would say they feel a hell of alot worse than they did in the first 6 months of ttc!

 

[charbaby]

I was trying for 2 years for my first and honestly this would not bother me. I wanted my baby not theirs so tbh whether they were pregnant or not had no bearing on how I felt

Your lucky you felt like this because I found it so upsetting everytime I found out someone else was pregnant, I used to get myself all worked up thinking why can't that be me with that news to share. I never begrudged anyone having a baby just didn't understand y i was the only one that couldn't (obviously I knew really i wasnt the only one but at the time thats what it would feel like) Now I am pregnant I can imagine what others like me could feel like.