As a mother who formula feeds..

[cherryglitter]

Why so much energy defending a choice that's not even a very good one? Everyone knows formula is far inferior.Its the alternate choice but not even a close one to the real thing. I have a theory. So much effort here trying desperately not to feel guilty about giving your baby inferior nutrition with no antibodies to protect your baby. Possible illnesses & food allergies in your babies futures... GUILT is a built in mechanism ladies, just like physical pain is when you put your fingers on a hot stove. Its a warning sign there to alert you not to ignore it.. that something is wrong.Your guilt is your subconscience warning you that you're making a poor choice. SURE its your freedom, your choice. BUT it's a poor & selfish choice in most cases. Wake up & listen to it. Has anyone addressed the guilt a formula feeding mom feels when her baby gets seriously ill that first year or God forbids he dies? Redbook totally minimized the huge important fact that formula fed babies have no antibodies to fight any nasty bacteria/virus that comes along. Sure breastfed babies get ill too. BUt if my baby was formula fed & that happened to him you can BET there'd be this voice in the back of my head whispering "gee I wonder if he'd have been ok IF ONLY he'd had my antibodies to help protect him!" Hmmmm? A harsh & sad but true reality of making selfish choices

Just one of the many neg comments

Someone actually said that?! And people try telling FFing parents that THEY are the narrow minded ones?

Bexy you should have a look at them im stunned

I wonder how she would feel if I were to say breastmilk can carry diseases from the mother THROUGH to the child, ie HIV. Im only stating facts? Just as breastfeeding mothers do about formula feeding.

 

[AppleBlossom]

By saying "breast is best" that is just educating, not ramming it down your throat.

It is when you hear it a thousand and one times though . I got fed up of seeing posters in the hospital all repeating the same thing.

^^ WSS. There are posters everywhere, HV'S and MW's are always going on about it. There is an advert on UK tv advertising stage 2 formula and it includes the words "We all know breast milk is best for your baby, nothing compares to it." Yes. We get it.

Yes I saw that the other day too. Even annoyed my OH.

I know women who are really pressured by their OH's to breastfeed. I've seen one woman reduced to tears because of the way her husband was treating her. It's awful. I really think there should be 'advocates' for both sides. Formula milk should be advertised, not compared! xx

I was. I never wanted to BF. I didn't want to and never had the desire too. But FOB pressured me into it. His step mum (who was "supermum" and could do no wrong) breast fed and he put so much pressure on me to do it (and so did she) making out like I would be inferior and a failure if I didn't that I caved and said I would. For 11 days I would sit and cry in agony whenever Grace fed. I would cry myself to sleep knowing that she would be awake soon and wanting to feed. And the worst thing was, she simply wasn't getting enough milk and so she would scream and scream because she was still hungry despite her being properly latched the HV told me a number of times her latch was perfect) It got to a point where I was so depressed that I couldn't even bear to look at her and I hated being around her because I knew at some point I would have to feed her. With all of that combined it was safest and best for the both of us that I changed to FF. It took me a good few months to create a bond with her after having such a crap start but I did eventually and I have to say that in a way, formula saved me because I can't imagine what I might have done had I had to keep BFing, as drastic as it sounds. I was all for running away. And of course when I stopped BFing I got "the look" off his stepmum and he didn't hesitate in letting me know that I had failed as a mother

 

[cherryglitter]

By saying "breast is best" that is just educating, not ramming it down your throat.

It is when you hear it a thousand and one times though . I got fed up of seeing posters in the hospital all repeating the same thing.

I sincerely doubt the doctors are trying to annoy or offend you. Like I said, they are educated health professionals! They are presenting the best option for feeding your baby, simple as that.

Yes, but when I state that im not interested in breastfeeding and never will be. Do you think its right that a midwife should carry on about the benefits and insist on presenting me with leaflets etc? Surely she should have turned around and started discussing formula feeding with me. There were things I didn't know and I learnt on this forum.

 

[Missy86]

You should be APOLOGIZING to your babies!"My nipples were sore"; "My baby- my boobs"; "It isn't easy"...are all merely selfish & poor excuses for moms to justify a choice that's EASIER for themselves in lieu of their BABIES' best interest. I'm not a breast-feeding fanatic,or a member of La Leche. Im just a professional working mom who educated herself about b.f. versus formula & discovered the evidence is OVERWHELMINGLY in favor of breastfeeding in terms of whats better for BABY. Mom's selfish inconveniences aren't a priority. There's not a shred of evidence in benefit of BABY to bottle feed. It doesnt take a hundred studies to know that logically a cow's milk is far inferior to a mother's milk for a human baby who has NO ANTIBODIES of their own. Yeah breast feeding can be difficult & time consuming & requires schedule juggling. BUT ARE THESE WOMEN NOT TAUGHT THAT THEIR SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT NEW FUNCTION IN BECOMING A MOM IS IN THE SAFETY AND HEALTH (i.e. 'FEEDING') OF THEIR BABY? THAT's YOUR NEW PRIORITY IN LIFE MOM!! I simply looked at the facts & made the necessary sacrifices to do what was FAR HEALTHIER for my baby. Exposing a newborn to the new world without any immune defenses wasnt an option I'd consider! Excruciatingly sore nipples? Yeah I've been there too. The secret to success with b.f. is simply purchase a pump before your baby is born. That way you can relieve the stress and pressure off of mom & success will be highly attainable. You simply practice at each feeding, & when you/baby gets frustrated you switch to the pump for that feeding, & then try again the next time. This way mom stays calm & baby gets the nutrition that He so much deserves.

Another one, dont recal the other article gettig this from the ff

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I dont fee guilty for not trying to BF? Tried it and didn't like it at all.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

You should be APOLOGIZING to your babies!"My nipples were sore"; "My baby- my boobs"; "It isn't easy"...are all merely selfish & poor excuses for moms to justify a choice that's EASIER for themselves in lieu of their BABIES' best interest. I'm not a breast-feeding fanatic,or a member of La Leche. Im just a professional working mom who educated herself about b.f. versus formula & discovered the evidence is OVERWHELMINGLY in favor of breastfeeding in terms of whats better for BABY. Mom's selfish inconveniences aren't a priority. There's not a shred of evidence in benefit of BABY to bottle feed. It doesnt take a hundred studies to know that logically a cow's milk is far inferior to a mother's milk for a human baby who has NO ANTIBODIES of their own. Yeah breast feeding can be difficult & time consuming & requires schedule juggling. BUT ARE THESE WOMEN NOT TAUGHT THAT THEIR SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT NEW FUNCTION IN BECOMING A MOM IS IN THE SAFETY AND HEALTH (i.e. 'FEEDING') OF THEIR BABY? THAT's YOUR NEW PRIORITY IN LIFE MOM!! I simply looked at the facts & made the necessary sacrifices to do what was FAR HEALTHIER for my baby. Exposing a newborn to the new world without any immune defenses wasnt an option I'd consider! Excruciatingly sore nipples? Yeah I've been there too. The secret to success with b.f. is simply purchase a pump before your baby is born. That way you can relieve the stress and pressure off of mom & success will be highly attainable. You simply practice at each feeding, & when you/baby gets frustrated you switch to the pump for that feeding, & then try again the next time. This way mom stays calm & baby gets the nutrition that He so much deserves.

Another one, dont recal the other article gettig this from the ff

Oh thats pretty harsh. I think that I would like to think my parents did whatever they felt comfortable with and I am sure my children think the same.

 

[AppleBlossom]

I won't read the comments on the article because they'll just annoy me. Like I said, I don't feel guilty and those kinds of comments don't make me feel bad but they do make me angry that people can be so narrow minded and nasty about someone's parenting choices

 

[better2gether]

Any "cons" for BFing seem to be for the mother, not the baby, and my LO comes before me now. Personally, I knew my breasts were no longer sexual objects once I got pregant, because I knew I would be BFing and pumping. My OH supported that because ultimately he wanted the best for our baby and he could deal with not having my boobs to play with for 6 months-1 year. Our sex life hasn't changed at all. I'm not ashamed of what my boobs are doing either. It isn't gross and unnatural, and they are still mine and I love them!

 

[Missy86]

Dont worry I will appologise to Rhys when he is old enough for my failings as a mother

 

[AppleBlossom]

Dont worry I will appologise to Rhys when he is old enough for my failings as a mother

Grace only has one parent that has failed her and it's not me...

 

[cherryglitter]

Dont worry I will appologise to Rhys when he is old enough for my failings as a mother

Don't be silly hun. You're an amazing mother and no one should make you feel anything but!!! xxxx

 

[Missy86]

Its ok hun I wa being sarky to the above comment

 

[cherryglitter]

Its ok hun I wa being sarky to the above comment

Ah I know I just don't want you to feel bad about it all. xx

 

[Dragonfly]

I am still breastfeeding my son, was glad I went that way and its worked for us. I had no support myself other than this forum, so glad I found here to.

 

[better2gether]

Dont worry I will appologise to Rhys when he is old enough for my failings as a mother

Was this directed towards me? To be clear, I have NEVER said any of you women are failing as a mother! Such assumptions shouldn't be made.

 

[AppleBlossom]

I think it's great that some people find BFing comes naturally to them and their baby. It's a shame that it can't be that way for all mothers. It's just luck that those mum's have a choice nowadays. Back when there was no such thing as formula the infant mortality rate was much much higher

 

[Missy86]

Any "cons" for BFing seem to be for the mother, not the baby, and my LO comes before me now. Personally, I knew my breasts were no longer sexual objects once I got pregant, because I knew I would be BFing and pumping. My OH supported that because ultimately he wanted the best for our baby and he could deal with not having my boobs to play with for 6 months-1 year. Our sex life hasn't changed at all. I'm not ashamed of what my boobs are doing either. It isn't gross and unnatural, and they are still mine and I love them!

I was that statement that got to me, I only did it for 5 days and Cherry didnt do it at all does that mean we put ourselves before our Los

 

[Missy86]

I think it's great that some people find BFing comes naturally to them and their baby. It's a shame that it can't be that way for all mothers. It's just luck that those mum's have a choice nowadays. Back when there was no such thing as formula the infant mortality rate was much much higher

me and Rhys both would have died if I didnt have a c section, makes you think

 

[Dragonfly]

Any "cons" for BFing seem to be for the mother, not the baby, and my LO comes before me now. Personally, I knew my breasts were no longer sexual objects once I got pregant, because I knew I would be BFing and pumping. My OH supported that because ultimately he wanted the best for our baby and he could deal with not having my boobs to play with for 6 months-1 year. Our sex life hasn't changed at all. I'm not ashamed of what my boobs are doing either. It isn't gross and unnatural, and they are still mine and I love them!

I was that statement that got to me, I only did it for 5 days and Cherry didnt do it at all does that mean we put ourselves before our Los

I think she was referring to her own situation, I would feel the same to my LO first. With you you did put your LO first as you where hardly going to let your baby starve now where you.

 

[better2gether]

Cherry said something along the lines of, "My boobs-my boobs." Did she not? That is an example of what I was referring to.