Babee_Bugs - Testing section - BFP PG176 - 1st Scan Booked 13-09-12

[Babee_Bugs]

I think I drank wayyyyyyyy too much alcohol... but it had to be done lol

 

[Lovn.sunshine]

It was fab! But very exhausting... I've never walked, run, jumped, danced so much in all my life! Kids loved it and we've got lots of happy good memories.. So it was a success , wished we stayed for longer though

Sounds amazing! And I totally hear that exhausting part - I always end up feeling like I need a vacation from my vacation
Glad you all had such a fab time, though!

EDIT: haha I think you've well earned those drinks after all you've been though

 

[Babee_Bugs]

Hahaha that's exactly how I feel... I need a holiday, where I just laze around the pool, in blistering heat, where a nice young gentleman serves me drinks all day without me having to move! Hahaha (HEAVEN)

 

[Babee_Bugs]

I've got a funny sneaky feeling, that I maybe implanting!

Reason I say this is because, it feels similar to ovulation... But cervix is firm, in the middle ish and closed also CM is creamy...

I'm roughly 5-7dpo from when I believe I may of ovulated....

I had this when I fell in feb, at 7dpo I had what felt like ovulation pains, but didn't have EWCM etc... 2 days later a digital said pregnant...


So could this be? It feels very very similar

 

[Lovn.sunshine]

Of course it could be! Especially if that's how it was feeling in Feb.
That means in just a few days you can test to see!

 

[Babee_Bugs]

I suppose only time will tell, we weren't trying this cycle... OH refused spermies and then I thought I ovulated due to all the symptoms cervix etc etc, but it looked like I failed to ovulate, because 5 days later I got all the symptoms again and then my temps went up... But of course I then had spermies since I thought I ovulated the first time round.

OH delightfully told me on holiday, he's done with TTC, he doesn't want another child.. He just likes the set up that we have now and offered to buy me another dog!... I don't bloody want another dog, ... So he wants me to go on contraceptive when AF arrives. So I suppose this is my only hope. (he keeps changes his mind like the bloody weather, I can't be arsed with him anymore).


I've just tested and it's BFN

 

[bettybee1]

Glad you had a good holiday !!!! Don't go on contraceptive if you want another baby you oh will come round infact I wouldn't even tell him if he's playing hot and cold it's propely because he's soo scared it will happen again men don't like things when they aren't simple there not like women who just learn too take things on the chin my lovely partner has told me not too tell him next time I get a positive test till at Least 6-7 week and am ready for a scan I was like charming so who the hell do u tell haha!!!! Men !!!!! There complete k**bs sometimes !!!!!! Xxxx

 

[Babee_Bugs]

He's been hot and cold for a while, which was all sparked off when we found out I miscarried at our 12 week scan. Straight away even still in the scanning room, he was like that's it! I'm not trying no more...

Then when I got pregnant again, he was like oh no, not again.... Then I miscarried again and that time he was like we will do whatever it takes to get your pregnant! And it was me that was like I don't want to know!....


But he's said a few times, he just prefers it to be me and the boys and the dog!... He likes the way it is, he can't be arsed for a baby, screaming all day and night, we can't afford one, he wants to do his hobby (go karting, which is expensive)...

So I don't know what the hell to do! I keep every aspect of the whole baby making process top secret, unless he asks and even then I lie (I.e if I've tested or not).

I had him on board for years, and now he refuses to jump back on again... I know I'm gonna have to let go of my dream and hopes and take his up... But it SUCKs... I wish we were both still on the same page

 

[wookie130]

Just remember that he DOES NOT have the final say in TTC.

A relationship needs to be a partnership, and you both have the right to make your desires known and respected. No one should be putting their foot down, and trying to control the situation 100% of the way!

 

[bettybee1]

Yeah u think that he needs too reason with you huni becoz he was up for having a baby but now you have two mc's he doesnt want one " screaming n crying all the time " he would have had that if you had a succeful pregnancy so you need too ask hin what's changed because its you desire too have another baby and it was his aswell and tbh he shouldn't just say he doesn't want another just like that had he even considered what your feeling ?? (( honest babe you need too really deeply talk because your desire for another child is NOT going too go away !!! Please please please talk too him and like wookie said it take 2 for a releasonship too work and that's means both of you need to compromise not just " I hve decided I don't want a baby now " because I have changed my mind :((( I really feel for you becoz I know if my partner had said that I would be giving him a good slap and p'ss off to your mates !!!! Lol xxxxxx

 

[Babee_Bugs]

To be honest, I think I've come to the end of the road with our relationship. I don't give up too easy, but to be all fair it's just sooo bloody hard with him...

Life feels really hard to deal with right now... I'm constantly having to put on a brave face and a smile, as I can't talk to him without him going "well what about me?" I've got to the point where I just don't bother.

We have just had a argument there, because he's noticed I've come to bed without him, so as per usual he's followed me! (suffocation comes to mind!)... So he tries to resolve "the problem".... I just feel down, I do feel somewhat depressed and it's not something you can just resolve with a click of a finger etc.. But no, he will sit there and question me, and in the mean time, make me feel even worse because I end up snapping at him, due to all the questions!... Why does he do this for? Sometimes I just want to sit on my own, have abit of breathing space away from him and anyone!!!...

So he's stormed off downstairs saying "well when you snap out of this just remember how horrible your treating me!", and he seriously wonders why I don't talk to him?

I really need to get away from him, but I can't... I can't do it to the boys, but I'm sooo miserable :/

 

[future hopes]

Oh hunny i am so sorry u r goin through this es after wat u been through. Men can b so thoughtless and un understanding. I just hope all this passes. and soon

 

[bexxc]

oh my...i'm so sorry. like you haven't had enough ups and downs in your life. now it seems like you're dealing with his mood swings on top of it!

 

[AndreaFlorida]

Lots of I wish the best for you sweetie so sorry you're going through a rough time....I'm going through a bit myself at the moment...not with DH thank God above...but just "me" things....like trying to make "someone" of myself...and I'm not sure who I really am....I duno weird as it sounds but true! Prayers your way an lots of XOXOXOXOXOXOX!

 

[Babee_Bugs]

Andrea I feel the same.... For years I've just been a "mummy" when I became pregnant with my first son, I quit education and my job to be a full time mammy, my mum was a full time mum and I loved her always being there all the time for me. So that's what I've done for my boys.

Now there older and OH is adamant on the no more kids... I'm now having to think about my future and how I wish it to go. My future plan was to have another child, then when it turned 5 go and do something with myself. Well it looks like now I'll be skipping those 5 years, I just don't know what to do with myself :/

OH is just like well go to college or just get a job, yeh that's all well and good when you actually thoroughly wish to do that.... But I don't! He just can't understand why, I've tried talking, I've tried reasoning with him... And I just get conflicted information, one minute he wants to do everything in his power to get us pregnant and then the next, he shudders at the thought....

Hopefully this cycle doesn't result in pregnancy, because it will just be a nightmare! I can see his reaction now...

 

[bettybee1]

Aww I feel for you ....... You said he works from home aswell do you will both be with each other every minute off the day whig must be hard!!! You propely need abit of space too BREathe !!!!! Bless ya !!!! You have done well too be a stay at home mummy I think I wpuld be in a nutty unit haha!!! Especially if my parter was at home every day haha!!!!

Why don't you take something up ??? Something smalll too get going with something you really enjoy !!! It's really good for you plus your partner will have nothing on you like I bring all the meat in macho talk !!! But no go do something for YOUrself !!! Everyone needs that if you love babies and children what about child care or midwifery ??? Am going into te last year of my nursing but my friend on the course is 34 and she didn't do anything before just being a good mummy too her children and now she's doing this and she says all the time how pleased she is that she has done it it has given her insirpration tell me too shut up if you want haha!!!

Or if you have a hobby start taking it up again but I don't thing going too do something is a bad thing it would propely help your releasonship because everyone needs SPACe !!!! Xxxxxxxx

 

[Babee_Bugs]

yeh he works from home, so were with eachother constantly! and its hard work.

im gonna get my CV polished up tonight, i need to do something to get me out of the house and like you say space. Its very daunting though lol

Well ive tested, and I see something! does anyone else? i believe im between 6-11DPO lol

https://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h177/leannerain/14thaug.jpg
https://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h177/leannerain/14thauginvert.jpg

 

[sara070102]

I def see something not sure on the color but the width sure looks right.

 

[bettybee1]

Yeah get it looking good and get out there girl lol !!!!! I can imagine it too be abut scarey just be confident !!!! Lol


And as for your test I see the line I see it omg !!!! Hope it gets darker tmro xxxxx

 

[Babee_Bugs]

Yeh very scary!!!... last time i had a job was nearly 9 years ago!!!, ive done Computer home study courses, whilst my oldest was little... so its just abit scary lol

Oh im glad other people see it, i thought my eyes were playing tricks on me... Just hope tomorrow its still there and maybes a tad shade darker