Dealing with azoospermia?

[Deb111]

DH and I were TTC for a year before DH was diagnosed with azoospermia in Nov 09. We were told that he had no sperm and therefore he would not be able to have biological children. We went down the donor sperm route and I became pregnant 1st cycle in jan but sadly miscarried early on.
We have just started to try using DS again last month.
I am very frustrated that my doctor never mentioned any of the techniques mentioned here to give DH the chance to have bio kids.
Good luck to everyone.

Hi Greta

I'm so sorry your dr hasn't gone through all your options with you. Can you speak to him about the things you've read on here?

I wish you all the best whether you decide to look in alternatives or continue with the donor sperm route.

Let us know what happens xx

 

[loobylou_01]

Good luck April for january!

Greta - can't believe your doctor didn't discuss other options with you. Sorry to hear about your miscarriage too. Wishing you luck for your next cycle xx

 

[april4jdg]

I just wanted to say hi. Hope you all are doing well. No news for us- just waiting for the biopsy...It is snowing in Alabama though today! That's exciting! : )

 

[Nayla82]

Hi ladies.

Can I please Join? I have not stopped crying for the past 48hours

My Husband got his semen analysis result 2 days ago and it was ZERO AND 1 DEAD ONE

We have been trying religiously for 15 Months and I begged him to do the test for over 1 year, he was very very stubborn, My Gyno said to me she will book me for IUI this Month as all my tests were perfect and she said IUI will be the next step. I was very excited Husband of course had to give a Sample and the result never in a million years ZERO AND 1 DEAD, mayb low i can cope with but ZERO

Im so so scared and im trembling, Urologist wants to see him 2 weeks for another sample.. I keep thinking zero and 1 dead? Is there hope that a dead1 means there is a sperm? and is it a high chance that its a blockage? and once its unblocked millions of sperms will flow again and i might get pregnant naturally??

Help me please, I dont know what will happen? im so so so scared, any1 heard success stories with azoospermia? I thought i would be pregnant in the new year with IUI now its a whole new story.

My Christmas isnt going to be a good one

Help me please even a tiny bit of info i will be appreciate xx thank the lord i can talk to some1 in here about this.

 

[Deb111]

Hi Nayla

Firstly I wanted to send you a . You are very welcome here and will get lots of support and information.

The one thing I have learnt is that no 2 cases of this seem to be the same. But our reactions to it have a lot in common; shock, anger, fear, denial, grief. Right now it sounds like you are in shock and grieving for your ideal image of how you would become parents. People who haven't been through this tell me "it will all be ok". What they don't understand is that none of this is ok. Even if I end up with a baby one day, the trauma we will have had to go through to get there will never be "OK"!

There are lots of reasons why you hubby may have this problem. He may have something called a varicocele (an enlarged vein), his FSH / LH levels may not be right, he may have had undescended testes as a child which were dealt with later than they should have been, he may have had a groin injury, he may have a blockage - the list goes on. Some of these are treatable and things could still happen naturally. Some are not treatable, but may mean that your hubby has a procedure called surgical sperm retrieval where a urologist will carry out a short op where he tries to retrieve sperm which either can't get out because of a blockage or because of extremely low numbers. If this is the case and they can retrieve sperm, they can use them for ICSI.

There is of course the chance that they will not find any sperm, but whilst you should not rule this possibility out, try not to worry too much until you have some more info. I'm not sure of the significance of the one dead sperm as I don't think any of the girls on here have had that result. Do you actually have an appt with the urologist in 2 weeks or are you just taking a sample in? Do ask them if the centrifuge the sperm sample - it's important that they do as they can find some sperm that way that they may otherwise miss.

I'm sure we can all help you to put together a list of the questions you need to be asking him, but I don't want to bombard you with too much info all in one go.

Please know that you are not alone. It is very difficult when you get a diagnosis like this because your hubby will be hurting too and if you're anything like me, you don't want to put anymore pressure on him, but it affects you too.

If you want to PM me feel free. We will do all we can to support you as you move through this tough journey xx

 

[Flake-y]

Hi Nayla;
So sorry about the news of the zero sperm counr; we had the same news in March this year, it is absolutely devastating & I know exactly how you must be feeling.

We are about to start IVF using donor sperm as no sperm was found after the retreival op. We've had 2 unsuccessful IUIs so far.

I see you are also in Scotland, feel free to PM me also if you want to ask any questions about the doctors we've seen; they may well be the same ones that you will see. Certainly the urologist that did my DH's operation does all the sperm retreival ops in the west of Scotland so if you're in the west it'll be the same guy.

Anyway, we are all here for you, the thread is a great place to vent all your anger & know you are not alone!!!

 

[Nayla82]

Hi Ladies

Firstly from the bottom of my heart I thank you so so much for your fast responses

Debs- Thank you so much for all the information, The Urologist wants him to give a sample on the 28th December and on the 29th they will discuss what they find if anything? This next 2 weeks will be very very tough, not got a clue what to expect? Just want to wake up and we have the 2nd sample. I just hope and pray that its a blockage...

My husband slipped 3 discs in his back in September? I have read that this can cause the lack of Sperms? Im just trying to get as much knowledge as I can on this topic. We have only known for few days but my husband refuses to talk to me he will just come in from work and sleep. Hes gone very quiet and told me 'find another man that can give you a child I might as well be a women' I told him we get through this trial, it will be ok, Im trying to be relaxed but deep deep down i have never felt like this (as if some1 has ripped my heart straight out of me) God bless you ladies you all sound so so strong

I told my husband what ever happens we will do this together. We never thought this would happen Urologist didnt give him anything his exact words 'go live your life as normal, and i will see you in 2 weeks' for the past year i have bought him male vitamins not once has he took them last night after dinner i saw him quietly take the vitamin

I just feel with my husband when the problem is already there thats when he acts! hes a little over weight after he slipped his disc he had now started being active and avoiding snacks (again i begged him to be healthier 3 years ago) and now they have found ZERO count hes taking his vitamins.

I remember once my period came i was very upset and went down on my knees and begged him so much to take the sample for a peace of mind (last summer) He would get angry and tell me leave him alone and theres no need for any tests! yet i would go in month after month monitor my ovulation, i took blood tests, they checked if my tubes are blocked with the blue dye,, they did everything not once did any of the professionals say 'it might be your husband' deep deep down I thought it might be a problem... I have every emotion running through my vain.. Empty, sad, angry at him, very very scared ... I dont know how to think straight

I will definitely ask them to centrifuge the sample, as it just takes 1 to make a baby. Thank you again for that.

Have you told anyone about this? I told my best friend of 12 years last night and she said to me 'oh it will be ok just do IVF or Adopt' im like WHAT? as you mentioned no1 really knows whats going on just you.. She also said chill were in 2010 good technology, Again maybe i should not have told her, as it seems like she thinks im upset over nothing?? Ladies since i have been married i breath live and dream of being a mother

So sorry for sounding so so depressed, my heart cant stop beating fast im afraid people can see it

Flake-y- I wish you all the best with IVF we deserve happiness at the end of all this , All my family and friends are in Scotland, we moved down to london 5 Months ago with husbands job, im so so ALONE down here

I really wish I can jump through the screen and give you both a huge hug. I will stay on this forum now theres really no need for me to be anywhere else.. woow it all happened in a blink of an eye.

Im so scared it will be ZERO again in 2weeks dont think mu husbands heart is strong enough Deb on the 2nd sample did they find any sperms?

Sorry i will have to read your journal from the start, im sure everything im asking will be on there.

Again thank you so so much for allowing me to talk away, hopefully i will be much stronger and ready to face the world in the next few days

Love and hugs to you all xx

 

[Deb111]

You have to realise that you are both in shock right now and you can never underestimate what shock can do. Your husband's reaction and comments at the moment are very normal. It's very hard to deal with because YOU need his support too and it doesn't sound like he can offer that at the moment. As for confiding in people; that's up to you, but I have found I couldn't tell people half the story i.e. that we are having problems and IVF is our only option if even that, without the inane comments of "it will be ok - I know loads of people who have had children through IVF". This is so much more than all that!

Your friend is right about one thing though. We are lucky to be in this age of technology. 10 years ago, the diagnosis will have been the end of the line for our hubbys. SSR / ICSI would not have been an option

I don't know how busy your loves are, but we really had to make some time for us. We went for some long walks. Sometimes we talked about it all, sometimes we didn't really talk at all, but it did us good to get away from the phones, tv, mobiles and just be together.

You WILL get through this and he WILL get to the point when he's ready to talk to you about it more. It's a good start that you have seen him taking the vitamins. It's a positive step. You could suggest that he might want to confide in a close friend or family member if he doesn't feel he can talk to you about it right now. I suggested that to hubby, which he did (he has now interestingly told EVERYONE we know the full details, which I find very weird but my counsellor says he must be getting something he needs from doing that )

They didn't find any sperm in any of his samples but found 3 when they did the SSR. We were told that they were well formed, developed and motile, but they discarded them because they wont freeze for ICSI if less than 100 so our journey continues ... We're not ready to give up yet as we know he is capable of making 'some' so are busy researching alternatives.

Don't forget that sperm take 90/100 days to develop from start to finish and that you can't have an affect on those that have started to develop, so anything he decides to do in terms of changes in lifestyle, vitamins, exercise etc wont have any effect for 3 months.

What are your plans for christmas? I know it's hard, but you both need to try and enjoy christmas. There really is nothing either of you can do right now. Just keep reminding him that whilst this diagnosis is terrible for you both, they haven't found out he has some terminal illness and that you can get through this but you need to get through it together and with the support of us all here.

I'm not sayng things will get easier right now, but they will soon start to feel less raw and less of a shock.

Big hugs to you xx

 

[waitingginger]

Hi Nayla,

Just wanted to say i am so sorry you are going through this!! my man was also the same when he found out and i wish i could say it got easier but its 8 months down the line for us and its still hard!! My bloke doesnt want to speak about it at all!! i have tried broaching the subject and he just says he doesnt want to talk about it until he knows whats going on!! i have to respect thats what he wants and just wait for the doctors!!
What i would say is keep pushing the doctors make sure you get all the tests you can and you know how long before you get treatment because i havent and it has been a very quiet 8 months when other ppl have had their treatment by now!!

We also still have people staying to us all the time 'oh just relax it will happen' erm hello have you not just heard us say his sperm count is 0! my OH started off not wanting to tell many people because he thought they would laugh at him!! but we get asked so regularly when we are going to have children it was easier to start to tell people or when ppl ask just say we are trying! we were trying for 18 months before we found and we both knew it was a problem with him before we found because i had had tests and was ovulating so regularly its been 2 years and 4 months for us know of TTC.

Our sperm analysis also said they could see evidence of dead sperm but 'too few to count' we dont know what this means it has been a very slow 8 months we have had a blood test and an ultrasound but we have an apoinment on 22nd so i will be asking about the dead sperm and what it means and then will let you know!!

I am not sure about the slipped disk connection but i do know sperm regenerates every 3 months so sperm is never older then 3 months!

Its a hard time and it wont always be easier and i think because men dont like to talk about their feeling anyway to then have something like this happen to them makes them shut down even more! but its so frustrating you can always come and vent to us though sometimes we are all down too but atleast we can have a moan!!

x x x x

 

[Pink Lolly]

Hi Ladies

Firstly from the bottom of my heart I thank you so so much for your fast responses

Debs- Thank you so much for all the information, The Urologist wants him to give a sample on the 28th December and on the 29th they will discuss what they find if anything? This next 2 weeks will be very very tough, not got a clue what to expect? Just want to wake up and we have the 2nd sample. I just hope and pray that its a blockage...

My husband slipped 3 discs in his back in September? I have read that this can cause the lack of Sperms? Im just trying to get as much knowledge as I can on this topic. We have only known for few days but my husband refuses to talk to me he will just come in from work and sleep. Hes gone very quiet and told me 'find another man that can give you a child I might as well be a women' I told him we get through this trial, it will be ok, Im trying to be relaxed but deep deep down i have never felt like this (as if some1 has ripped my heart straight out of me) God bless you ladies you all sound so so strong

I told my husband what ever happens we will do this together. We never thought this would happen Urologist didnt give him anything his exact words 'go live your life as normal, and i will see you in 2 weeks' for the past year i have bought him male vitamins not once has he took them last night after dinner i saw him quietly take the vitamin

I just feel with my husband when the problem is already there thats when he acts! hes a little over weight after he slipped his disc he had now started being active and avoiding snacks (again i begged him to be healthier 3 years ago) and now they have found ZERO count hes taking his vitamins.

I remember once my period came i was very upset and went down on my knees and begged him so much to take the sample for a peace of mind (last summer) He would get angry and tell me leave him alone and theres no need for any tests! yet i would go in month after month monitor my ovulation, i took blood tests, they checked if my tubes are blocked with the blue dye,, they did everything not once did any of the professionals say 'it might be your husband' deep deep down I thought it might be a problem... I have every emotion running through my vain.. Empty, sad, angry at him, very very scared ... I dont know how to think straight

I will definitely ask them to centrifuge the sample, as it just takes 1 to make a baby. Thank you again for that.

Have you told anyone about this? I told my best friend of 12 years last night and she said to me 'oh it will be ok just do IVF or Adopt' im like WHAT? as you mentioned no1 really knows whats going on just you.. She also said chill were in 2010 good technology, Again maybe i should not have told her, as it seems like she thinks im upset over nothing?? Ladies since i have been married i breath live and dream of being a mother

So sorry for sounding so so depressed, my heart cant stop beating fast im afraid people can see it

Flake-y- I wish you all the best with IVF we deserve happiness at the end of all this , All my family and friends are in Scotland, we moved down to london 5 Months ago with husbands job, im so so ALONE down here

I really wish I can jump through the screen and give you both a huge hug. I will stay on this forum now theres really no need for me to be anywhere else.. woow it all happened in a blink of an eye.

Im so scared it will be ZERO again in 2weeks dont think mu husbands heart is strong enough Deb on the 2nd sample did they find any sperms?

Sorry i will have to read your journal from the start, im sure everything im asking will be on there.

Again thank you so so much for allowing me to talk away, hopefully i will be much stronger and ready to face the world in the next few days

Love and hugs to you all xx

Hi Nayla

So sorry to hear your news and sadly know exactly how you feel. My DH had his results of his first SA on 19th November and we found he had zero sperm. We were so devestated - when the GP told us I felt like the world stopped and I couldn't hear what he was saying any more. It sounds extreme but I almost felt like someone had died, or that something had been taken from me.

I can honestly say I cried non stop for the whole weekend and it really knocked me for six. I felt devestated, angry, upset and resentful that this had happened to us and I know my DH felt the same too. His second SA is next Tuesday and we have already geared ourselves up for the same news again.

So I know it isn't any consolation, but you're not alone. When we first got our results, I found this thread and it helped me come to terms with it all. But it takes time and it is understandable to be devestated. Even now after a few weeks, I still break down in tears from time to time but we are trying to focus on the way forward.

We have our first appointment with a consultant at the end of January and I can't wait for that so that we can find out a bit more.

Take care and keep in touch xx

 

[loobylou_01]

Hi Nayla,

We are another couple who are suffering from azoo. My DH was diagnosed on 30 Dec 2009 and lets say it was a terrible start to the new year. Like pink lolly says the room just swirled around us both and we were so shocked. We'd been TTC for 18 months at that point and my bloods had come back fine.

However we have got through it together and we are definitely a stronger couple for it. We had our first cycle of IVF in july/august this year and although we were gutted when the ssr was unsuccessful - sperm was found but it was abnormal and therefore despite not knowing that this was a possibility we had to decide there and then whether we wanted to try the cycle with DH's sperm or use the donor sperm that we had lined up 'just in case'. anyway my amazing dh felt we should use the donor sperm as he wanted us the best possible chance to have a baby - i was too upset to make any kind of choice. So we went ahead and used the donor sperm and as you can see from my ticker we're 21 weeks pregnant.

Been a massive rollercoaster and we still think about it everyday but we are pregnant and having a much wanted baby and who knows what the future treatments etc will bring.

Good luck and take care, all the girls who are going/been through this are fab and i don't think any of us could cope without each other at times

xx

 

[Nayla82]

You ladies are my Guardian Angels, I cried as I read each one of your msg's really close to home

This is our 4th day of knowing and I dont even recognise the Man I married hes so angry and he blames me for nagging him and making him do the test I dont know why hes so so angry towards me? He even told me he will throw my laptop in the bin if he sees me on it??

Im just trying to educate myself on the subject, I really want to shout at him im hurting just as much as him! his results were MY RESULTS also , Looking up vitamins is for OUR benefit. And being on this thread is a breather to know I have people that encourage me that there might still be hope.

When ever i tell him subtly the success rates of ICSI or vitamins that he must start soon, he just yells:

'shut up shut up!! I need my space your obsessed even though I have done the test your are still obsessed!" You know ladies I was excited of being a mom and maybe i was into charting tempting, now its all changed, im not obsessed anymore, I have gone crazy over something else how to get him healthy again! Woow for the past 15Months I have been so excited in my 2WW, Going to be weird to let this cycle come and go and know for a fact its a ZERO chance that I am pregnant i still feel its not hit me?? and I still will symptom spot and think im pregnant? that all i have been used to for so so long..

Yesterday we tried to carry on as usual and do a little Xmas shopping I broke down in the toilets, everywhere were mothers with Babies and pregnant women.. and lovely baby shops.. I almost collapsed I just told my DH I missed lunch and was getting stuffy, I couldnt tell him my TRUE feelings, I used to get so excited seeing new mothers and knowing soon that would me! now my whole world turned black .. Yes it feels like a death has happened.

Oh Goodness, Im feeling so ALONE. The anger my husband has towards me this morning I tried to be strong and initiate sex to show him i still love him.. His words:

" I know you dont want it! your just doing it to be polite I cant get you pregnant so dont bother' and he broke down.. Im doing my best to be normal. I told him you dont have a disease! its still in function and I love you its a problem that soon will be fixed! he rolled over and said leave me alone.. its walking on eggshells.. saying he would have been happier not knowing and the lord would have helped us!! I told him how can we get pregnant with ZERO SPERM, his words were that i have lost faith in God... Instead of knowing that theres a problem, that science might be able to fix hes still angry he did the test??? and 100% fixed it would have happened naturally.... hes making me feel guilty that i made him do the test! and what scares me sooo much ladies ok we let 16Months slip by, imagine if he was still stubborn for another 16Months At least we know what the problem is and its not 'unexplained fertility'

I know ladies with anything in life times a healer..for 15 Month NOT A SOUL knew we were TTC not even my mother, Now what do i say? we have been trying for well over 1 year and my husband does not have Sperms??

I just hope and pray over Christmas no one brings it up, I will probably break down, while my usual answer would be very soon..

We will be going up North to spend Christmas day with my family and I will be surrounded by babies and kids, just wished Christmas was over now and i can focus on this. I love Xmas so so much but now will be tough to be merry when its so so heavy on my mind!

Pink Lolly- Its Tuesday 28th also my husband gets to do the 2nd test, you will be in my prayers x I dont know if im just being stupid or naive but im telling myself the sample will definitely have some, it just has to! Maybe im setting myself for a 2nd crush to the heart, but another ZERO Noo Lord please it has to be some. I guess were in this waiting period together Is your husband talking anything Dear at the moment? The urologist gave nothing.. But I have made him take FertilAid for Men has Zinc and all sorts inside it?? Hope its a MAGIC pill

Debs- I read alot on the TurkClinic he sounds amazing!! and yes even with 5 im sure that will be ample to make your baby xx They emailed me within hours asking for a phone interview, I will see what 2nd sample says? but I will get back to them either way. If it means going to America I will ask my family for a little help with £ and im willing to go over... I want OUR babies more than anything...

Looby-lou- Huge congratulations on your pregnancy, Well done you deserve it xx I have not thought of a sperm doner and i dare to ask husband about it just yet.. if there is no way i may consider it?? .. Its a personal question Dear you dont have to answer, but would you tell your baby that He/She was a sperm doner? or as far as the babies concerned He/She is made from you both?? Again sorry for the question Im thinking would i tell or would i keep it to myself? I have soooo much running through my brains. I would consider it before adoption though, as i want to FEEL AND BE pregnant my heads spinning right now....

WaitingGinger- Thank you again for your kind words, will update everyone on here. 8Months is such a long time to wait in limbo, Im also eager to know with the DEAD SPERM found is there more dead ones hidden in there? can they bring it to life..? I have soo many questions in my head.. What i find out in the next test will share with everyone.

My husband said he will go alone on tuesday 28th and when he gets the results on the 29th he does NOT WANT ME THERE, those words killed me, even though this is about US he still feels its not my business and to leave him alone.. Which I will Just want to feel loved again.. this is the time we need each other the most, yet its all my fault??

I just hope hes just going to get over the shock as im worried stress will tarnish his next sample and realise either way IVF or ICSI is the next step whether he wants to believe it or not, the old fashioned way was not in our destiny

I went online quickly while he went to the garage, I bettr get going before it will be a reason for him to have a go at me

Again thank you so so much for your precious time and information, and i will try and pop in daily. Have a lovely weekend.

Love and hugs x

 

[Flake-y]

Nayle, so sorry you & your DH are having such a hard time; it's so awful, and I can't imagine how your DH will be feeling.

When we got the diagnosis, I tried to boost my DH's ego as much as possible; another girl with the same problem suggested I say things like "you're such a stud if you'd had sperm you'd probably have hundreds of children by loads of different women by now!" It was just a joke but it made him laugh & cheered him up. And I'd say things like "it's always the best looking guys that have this problem, the ugly ones all get to reproduce when they shouldn't"! Again, just a joke but it certainly helped to puff up his ego.

Maybe when the diagnosis is so fresh it's not the best time for jokes, but just making him realise that you still love him & the sperm thing doesn't matter might help him come to terms with it & will hopefully make you stronger as a couple.

The way he's acting is not helping at all, but he will be hurt, embarrassed & probably frightened that you might leave him. It's maybe just his way of dealing with it, although it is hurting you.

Hoping & praying that the 2nd SA comes back with better news for you.

 

[Nayla82]

Thank you Flake-Y you are correct hopefully within time I will be strong enough to crack some jokes I would love to get to that stage.. and I will do anything to see my husband smile again, he really is a BROKEN MAN,

He lost his Mother at the start of the year god bless her soul, Slipped discs in his back recently, and now this My heart bleeds for him, I try not to upset myself when he gets angry and shouts at me. Really has been a rotten year on so many levels. i pray 2011 will bring us 1% of Joy

I have read when Doctors say its better the man having the problem than the women? as its simple to fix the problem?? Did you women secretly wish that it was yourselves and not your partner? As i feel im much stronger than him and more open to go and get poked and prodded at if necessary.. I just want to take ALL HIS PAIN, I dont want to jinx myself! knowing my luck when everything will be ready for ICSI I will probably have something I just feel that everything that can goes wrong does go wrong?? I must always think of the worse case scenarios

My husband never ever dreams, this morning he woke up crying will i leave him? and i cheated on him? I said NO WAY! he said I will not blame you if you did... My goodness it will be 3 years of marriage in May 2011 and I took my vows seriously, sickness and in health.. Never ever will i cheat on him. He tosses and turns and I dont know what horrors are going through his poor head I also had a bad dream last night, my husband was crying telling me it isnt going to look good, be prepared.. I just wish I can get through this unknown period very very quickly! (and on christmas week! thats the icing on the cake )

I really wish I can come back in here in a few weeks saying it was a bad sample and he has millions in there, WISHFUL THINKING alot of cases that I have read states 90% of 2nd sample is also zero.. also I dont know if I mentioned that he had white blood cells in the sample? not sure if you ladies know what that means? I know it fights bacteria? but has it killed the sperms?? I dont know? times like I now I wished I studies Medicine at unversity... It gets all confusing

Love and hugs to all, and keep warm what a bitter day it is x

 

[Deb111]

Sorry haven't got much time to post at the moment, but just came across this which may be helpful. It seems that IF the white blood cells are very high they could be causing an issue but think they can treat as they can be present due to an infection so if infection is cleared white blood count will lower

"White Blood Cells:
The semen may contain a high number of white blood cells, which may be an indication of either infection or inflammation. White blood cells are considered significant if more than one million are found in each milliliter of the ejaculate.

White blood cells cannot be differentiated from other round cells normally found in the semen (debris and immature sperm) without special staining. If more than one million round cells are found in the ejaculate, a portion of the ejaculate should be specially stained to look for an increased number of white blood cells.

If the white blood cell count is elevated, semen cultures should be performed on a subsequent specimen. Unfortunately, the semen culture cannot be performed on the original specimen as it must be the first step performed on the specimen in order to keep it sterile. "

 

[april4jdg]

white blood cells means infection somewhere in the body-It could be a cold, or just anything...

They won't do IUI'S or IVF'S if there are too many white blood cells an the SA...

We are in the same boat you are. we are waiting on DH's biopsy on Jan 6..

I read you previous posts... It is so hard to deal with people who do not deal with infertility issues making comments like- "oh get ivf, or adopt"

When people hear infertility issues- they assume usually either it is the woman's "fault" or the man has low sperm count...

They never think that a SA can come back 0.

I never did. Until we had 2 come back 0.

They are reasons for azoospermia- non obstructive and obstructive... educate yourself. Lots of good books on Amazon. Did your doctor give any other results from SA? like volume? if it is low- it can be due to blockages, etc- fsh level?

Where have you read slipped disks can cause azoospermia? I thought I saw that somewhere...DH has trouble with his back as well- on L-3, L-4 he has had epidurals for it too-but when we got the azoo diagnosis- the RE never said anything- so I just let it kinda let it go.

Just know- you are not alone- anything you are feeling- just know we do/have have felt that way too. And when you feel like you can't talk to someone that understands...you can come here- because we understand perfectly. : )

 

[Pink Lolly]

Nayla - yes we are going through the horrible wait together and it is true that it is awful timing with Chrtistmas etc, but at least that will help the time go by more quickly...

I know you can't see it now but you will start to feel better soon. We got our results four weeks ago yesterday and I have never felt so devestated in my life. I had to be signed off work with stress for 2 weeks because I kept crying, couldn't sleep and I think it is understandable as it is such a shock. But now four weeks on I feel much more positive and I can't wait to get the next SA done and move onto the next stage.

When we got our results, the GP we saw was fantastic and he was the one who said to my DH that even if no sperm is found, we could consider a donor. My DH had never heardof a donor and he said that made him feel better, as he could see that we still had a chance even if the worst case happens - it's not the end of the road. Maybe your DH might feel the same?

Initially my DH was very positive about it all, but he did break down a couple of weeks ago saying he felt worthless and guilty that 'he was stopping me having a baby'. That was a turning point for me to be honest because I realised that me being miserable was making things worse for him as he was feeling guilty.At that point I decided to try to pull myself together and although I still feel devestated, I am being as strong as I can for him. I went back to work and tried to restore some normaility to our lives and I think we both feel a bit better now.

I can understand why you're hoping for a better sample next time around but we have opted for the 'self preservation' approach and are already expecting a zero count again (that way we will be over the moon if it's any better!). In fact, we just want to get it out of the way so that we can start to do whatever is next.

Interestingly my DH felt I was spending too long reading things online and said I was making things worse by going over and over it. But when I came across this thread, I told him that I had met some girls online who were going through or had gone through the same and I read some of the messages I had to him. He completely changed his mind and said he could see how it was helping me and I think it made him feel better that hes not the only one.

I'm sure things will settle down for you soon - it is such early days. I know my DH felt like I was going on and on about it at one point and racing ahead so we have agreed to take one step at a time now. I expect your DH just needs some time to come to terms with it all and it must be a thousand times worse for the DHs. If you have got someone you can confide in then it would really help, as you need support. We have told both sets of parents and couldn't have got through it without them.

Take care and Keep in touch xxx

 

[Deb111]

Hi Pink

So glad to hear you sounding more positive about things. I hope you are able to get some answers and move on to whatever the next step is for you very soon

Hugs
Deb xx

 

[Pink Lolly]

Hi Pink

So glad to hear you sounding more positive about things. I hope you are able to get some answers and move on to whatever the next step is for you very soon

Hugs
Deb xx

Thanks Deb

It seems strange - only a couple of weeks ago I was the newby here but now I am feeling stronger and can try to comfort others like you all did for me .

My GP made a referrel to the fertilility clinic before DH had done a SA. So although DHs 2nd SA isn't until next week, I have already got the consultant appointment through for 20th Jan so it has sped things up a bit. I am really looking forward to it just to see what happens next and I feel like the ball is starting to roll. Hope you're doing OK xx

 

[Nayla82]

Good Morning Ladies.

Debs- Thank you for the white cells information, I guess it not anything too serious that i should i worry about.

Again thank you ALL for your Kind Words. I think I have read everything I can on Azoospermia but i still feel confused about certain things and trying to hold on to hope

I cant really seem to find Whats more popular the blocked or unblocked Azoospermia? I would appreciate any knowledge? Do you think theres a high chance he was born with it or did it happen overtime? his brother has 5 children so I don't think its genetic or maybe?

Urologist gave NO added information, just come back on the 28th and do the 2nd test. No blood tests? hormone tests? just wants to see 2nd test (worst thing my husband does not want me to be there when he gets the 2nd results so hoping and praying he tells me every information they found, I don't want him to keep it to himself) As his exact words were:

'i dont want to know and i dont care about other peoples success stories as there not mine!' He's very very upset and keeps telling me to wake up! hes a realist and im a dreamer! hate his attitude when he says theres a 90% chance we will never have our biological kids, he told me last night get used to the idea of having no kids will be hard for the first few weeks but we will get used to it... NO WAY! I want to adopt or anything!! How can i just agree and say 'yes dear we will just carry on' I cant ladies I really cant.. Again I hope and pray its ANGER talking not him. I feel like he wants to give up now! Theres no fighting left in him?? and hopefully if i move on to IVF OR ICSI i need him to be supportive as it may not work 1st time.. theres a longgg road ahead of us and i need him to be STRONG.

I just want to live in my bubble 'they will find sperms put it in me and i will be pregnant ' i tremble at other thoughts...

Also ladies Have you read anywhere (MY IDEAL SITUATION) where it can just be a blockage and when they unblock the problem you can go ahead have sex and get pregnant naturally? or either way IVF OR ICSI will be on the cards?

I feel my brian will blow with all the information, When i stop looking up information i feel GUILTY im not doing my part.. and i really cant see much information online that will tell be IT WILL BE FINE? But I thank the lord for this thread..

April- Thank you so much for your warm words x. In regards to the slipped discs, i have been jumping through one site to another but i will try and find the quote in regards to slipped and hernia dics, definitely a link with low/zero sperm..

Take care love and hugs xx

Your all in my prayers xx