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Dealing with azoospermia?

Yes Rainbow123 you are right. We were mentally prepared plus my hubby took day off for this appointment ...but at end I believe that what is best for us that happens.thanks a lot for great support on this forum.I wish you all the very very best may all of our efforts brings out a lovely fruit..
 
we had to see our GP's for my bloodwork then i had ultrasound etc.
Then hubby did first SA.
azzo result.
Sent to see FS.
referred to urology then back to FS for a treatment plan.

seem likes its different all over the UK never ind overseas.

tulip- i would b e expecting after the urologist has done his/her bit they pass you back to the FS.

MrsMo- Where you getting sperm from? (thats sound awful dont it) ha
Will you get your IVF/ free?

hopefully were all gonna b getting down to it at the same time xxx

All the too-ing and fro-ing between specialists takes so bloomin' long doesn't it?! I was hoping that when we have our appointment on the 15th with the FS they might be able to start the tests to see whether they could find any sperm but it sounds like he'll have to go back to the urologist (who said that he was discharging DH as there was nothing else he could do!?).
I wish we could afford to go private as it seems like with the NHS there is just waiting list after waiting list. We got our pre-appointment letter through saying that we would be given appointments/slips to make more appointments with different departments for certain scans and blood tests for me to have (which I can understand is useful) but it would save a lot of time if they just told me to book scan appointments now so that I have the results when we go and see them on the 15th. ARGH!

MrsMo - how do you go about choosing a sperm donor? Have your clinic been able to advise you on where to look for it? Do you get a catalogue or something? Good luck with choosing it anyway, it must be exciting to know that the other genetic half of your baby will be in those pages!

Have a lovely weekend ladies XXX


Hi Ladies, our clinic has their own donor scheme but they said they have trouble finding donors in the UK these days since the anonymous option was removed. They said we'll get much more choice from the European Sperm Bank (I tried to link to it but not allowed as I'm new) to try to get the best match to my husband. There is less of a waiting list for it too as you just order from what's available and it arrives within 2 weeks! I think it's based in Norway (I need to have a closer look now we know we need to choose, we're just letting things sink in before rushing into the next stage), I had a quick look before and was surprised by how much information was available. The prices are on there too.

I got a bit upset yesterday as I remembered telling my friends how excited I was about how cute our kids were likely to be as my husband is so gorgeous (to me) and also has young cousins who are stunning. I know that's totally superficial but it also got me thinking about saying things like "He/she gets that from her father" as this situation might always be at the back of my mind if I say that in the future. All of this assuming the IVF even works as so many things can still go wrong of course! But I'm trying not to think about that, I can only get through this with trying to be positive.

Mrs G, since we've now gone private I don't think we can get our treatment on the NHS but we'd have to wait until Nov 2014 to start treatment anyway and decided since we are lucky enough that we have family who have offered to help us pay, we don't want to wait for many reasons (possibly moving around that time, work, age, my sanity, etc.) so we'll hopefully be starting IVF in May/June.
 
I got a bit upset yesterday as I remembered telling my friends how excited I was about how cute our kids were likely to be as my husband is so gorgeous (to me) and also has young cousins who are stunning. I know that's totally superficial but it also got me thinking about saying things like "He/she gets that from her father" as this situation might always be at the back of my mind if I say that in the future. All of this assuming the IVF even works as so many things can still go wrong of course! But I'm trying not to think about that, I can only get through this with trying to be positive.

I've been thinking a lot about this too. I've been with DH for 12 years now, since we were at school, and I've always said what beautiful children we would have because of his good looks too. I've seen so many of his baby photos, so always imagined our children being like him. He's got 3 brothers, one of them has two babies already, and we all laugh about their 'traits' (including the little ones). It worries me that I'm going to be over thinking things that I say, as I don't want DH to feel uncomfortable or hurt in any way as he's already had so much to deal with.
But like you say, we have to think positive. We will get our babies and when we do I'm sure all these things that we worry about will wash away. I suppose it's all still 'the unknown', which is what makes it scary, but once it happens we'll probably still be able to see similarities between DH and our babies as it's not just physical characteristics that children have in common with their parents - nurture over nature!
Thank you for sharing as it's helped me to understand my own thoughts, which over the last few months have been so jumbled up in my head that I've found it hard to think! It's made me realise that our babies will still remind us of their daddies despite biological make up. This forum really is a God send! :hugs:
 
Morning Ladies.

Tulip- thats really rubbish about your appointment. Hopefully on Tuesday you will get some answers- will be thinking about you please let us know.

MrsMo/Rainbow- I also have had a breakdown over the whole looks thing. mine isn't mainly facial wise but me and my hubby are both fairly short, only 5ft2 n 5ft 5, which is little for a man. When i have looked on the xytex site there was 100's of donors to choose from but none that 100% matched.
I had a quotation come back for 5 vials (5 shots) storage and postage which to be honest i wasn't too horrified at. So i know this is an option.

However after speaking with our clinic last week they advised if we wanted to use a known donor they would start the process now to run along side hubby's tests, so if its disappointing news for my hubby we have back up in place. Made all of this really real and really felt for my hubby.
We had to go and speak to his brother (and wife) last night who are 100% behind us and explain what was going to happen.
Hubby let me do all the talking, wish he had said something but he brother just said "i will do what i need to do, Ill do anything for you, your my little brother" nearly broke down on the spot but kept it together and even had a few laughs.
This way it kinds of stamps out the looks/height thing as there the imagine of each other.
Feel positive this morning that we have a plan in place.

been thinking about CM too :(

How is everyone? xxxx:hugs:
 
MrsG30 - that's fantastic news about your hubby's brother. :happydance:
My DH has an older brother (who is genetically a half brother but they don't see each other as anything different to DH's 2 younger brothers) who has had children already and is the one most likely to help us out, but he has blond hair and DH and I are both dark haired. One of his younger brothers is almost like his double, but I can't see him and his girlfriend agreeing to help when they've not even got their own children. :nope:
How did you broach the subject with your brother in law? Did he know about the situation and offer to help or did you decide to ask? It's so hard knowing what to do in these situations!
Hope you and hubby are both coping ok. :hugs:
X
 
Well Hubby just randomly blurted it out the same day we got the diagnose. He was away with work and his brother was there with him and he just said in his "emotional" state can/will you help? His brother said he would need to speak to his wife but couldn't see a problem.

To be honest i don't know how we would have approached it if he hadn't done it this way. However my sis in law mentioned soon as i told her what had happened.
they have kids and we knew they didn't want anymore he was actually booked in for the snip!!! so maybe that was fate.
I think if hubby hadn't of asked once my bil mentioned it to his wife she would have told him to offer.

Is it something your hubby would consider?
hope ur ok xxxx:hugs:
MrsG30 - that's fantastic news about your hubby's brother. :happydance:
My DH has an older brother (who is genetically a half brother but they don't see each other as anything different to DH's 2 younger brothers) who has had children already and is the one most likely to help us out, but he has blond hair and DH and I are both dark haired. One of his younger brothers is almost like his double, but I can't see him and his girlfriend agreeing to help when they've not even got their own children. :nope:
How did you broach the subject with your brother in law? Did he know about the situation and offer to help or did you decide to ask? It's so hard knowing what to do in these situations!
Hope you and hubby are both coping ok. :hugs:
X
 
Well Hubby just randomly blurted it out the same day we got the diagnose. He was away with work and his brother was there with him and he just said in his "emotional" state can/will you help? His brother said he would need to speak to his wife but couldn't see a problem.

To be honest i don't know how we would have approached it if he hadn't done it this way. However my sis in law mentioned soon as i told her what had happened.
they have kids and we knew they didn't want anymore he was actually booked in for the snip!!! so maybe that was fate.
I think if hubby hadn't of asked once my bil mentioned it to his wife she would have told him to offer.

Is it something your hubby would consider?
hope ur ok xxxx:hugs:
MrsG30 - that's fantastic news about your hubby's brother. :happydance:
My DH has an older brother (who is genetically a half brother but they don't see each other as anything different to DH's 2 younger brothers) who has had children already and is the one most likely to help us out, but he has blond hair and DH and I are both dark haired. One of his younger brothers is almost like his double, but I can't see him and his girlfriend agreeing to help when they've not even got their own children. :nope:
How did you broach the subject with your brother in law? Did he know about the situation and offer to help or did you decide to ask? It's so hard knowing what to do in these situations!
Hope you and hubby are both coping ok. :hugs:
X

That sounds like the best way to do it! :)
At the moment I really don't know what to do and can't see that my hubby would be open to it. Had a rather emotional day yesterday. We went for a walk and sat down to enjoy the view and DH started opening up about how crappy he's feeling. For some unknown reason on top of azoo he also has chronic inflammation of one of his testicles (they say there's a cyst but apparently it's unrelated to the azoo) which he's had for just over a year now. I've booked him to see the doc about it AGAIN so I really hope they can sort something out that works this time. Anyhoo, on top of the pain he's also feeling low about the azoo. We had a chat about what I've found out from reading everyone's experiences on here, and told him that we might want to have a think about things before our FS appointment as they might mention sperm donors. Well, after thinking that he was kind of open to this (he told me recently that whatever happened, I would have a baby so I inferred this meant sperm donor would be an option), he pretty much discounted it. :cry: I'm hoping that it's just that at the moment there's still hope and so he doesn't want to give that up until we have to. As he and I are the only ones that know about his diagnosis it's difficult as I can't help wondering that if his side of the family knew they'd offer to help.
We both got home from our outing close to tears and felt pretty rubbish until I got to work today and the lovely children in my class came in and cheered me up again (they really are a great anti-depressant!).
I really can not wait until 15th May when we are finally going to be able to start getting somewhere as the last 6 months have been awful.
And there I was thinking I was getting more positive about this whole thing! It's a flipping emotional roller coaster isn't it?!
X
 
I am so sorry to hear about all of that Rainbow 123. My husband is also not liking the idea of donor sperm. Unfortunately he is the last boy in his side of the family. He has one 20 year old boy cousin but that's it. He wants to wait until every single possible option has been tested and tried before going the donor sperm route.

This is such a terrible roller coaster ride. I wish that none of us had to go through this, at least we aren't going through it alone. I am glad that your DH was willing to sit and talk to you. I have read and heard of others who won't even talk about it or their feelings.

I hope that you FS goes well and that you can get some good news.
 
Rainbow and Milki-

I know i hate that we are all going through this, sometimes seems so unfair when its such a natural thing but then i give myself a reality check and just know we have to deal with it. That doesn't mean im not sad/disappointed and often break down but i'm trying to hold it together.

Thankfully i have my mum who knows everything and 2 of my best friends who i can talk too, My hubby knows they know and hes actually even spoke to one of my friends about it. He had however on numerous times asked "do we have to talk about it" or "we've already discussed this"

He rang me today at work and just said his brother has an appointment on Friday this week so least thats the ball rolling, when i asked him if he was OK he said "i'm OK, i just wish it wasn't coming to this" Felt my heart breaking for him. He did then say "well least things are moving" so I know hes happy the ball is rolling.
I was reading the tests he might need to have out to him last night from our FC WWW and i seen the look on his face, he said bloody hell that's a bit intrusive followed by but if it works.... I asked him if he was frightened to have the done and he said he wasnt. He did say to have MTESE the % of finding sperm needs to be high as he doesn't know if he/we can take another let down.
I just don't want him to rubbish his chances because he knows we have a back up
Hopefully after he has seen the urologist in a few weeks he will feel more positive????

regarding the donor sperm, he said to me he will use whatever it takes to get what we want, but he was very hung up on the idea that the baby would not look like him. Even when i explainned about the matching he looked so sad but least i know he would resort to that- I hope your Hubby's will too if need be xxxx:hugs:
 
Hi everyone
I hope everyone would be doing good...well today we had our first appointment with urologist..He asked about my hubby history,habits etc etc and also asked me about my age ...well he explained a lil bit about azoospermia..he did general checkup...then my hubby submitted urine sample and blood samples for tests..dr told us that we will receive our appointment letter for ultra sound and SA within a week or two and then at that time we ill be given urine and blood tests results..he said that from blood tests we ill know whether its obstructive or non obstructive...but my question is that when we asked him that where the SA sample has to be submitted so he said in BRI where we already had previous 2 SA tests...but what I read that Urologists do their own advance SA ....lets see what ill happen...btw what do you girls think how much time our results will take ? thanks best wishes to all of you.
 
Hi Tulip,

glad your appointment went well :hugs:
There is usually only one place that does SAs (at least here there is only one). And every doctor will send you there. It just depends on what your doctor orders - eg our GP ordered a "standard" SA, and then our RE ordered a specialized SA, then an even more specialized one. The same lab can do them all.

They should get the test results within one week. Most of them are done the next day, some usually take a bit longer (eg some STD tests).

MrsG30 - glad you see that things are moving along for you guys! I tend to agree with you in thinking that you should try the mTESE, since there is a real chance that they'll find something. But in the end it's a very personal decision to make.
 
Miki - Thank you for your message :) I feel that it's going to be the case for us too, making sure we've exhausted all the other options before we can consider donor sperm, if only for peace of mind that we're making the right choice. What's your appointment in May for? Is it a SA to see if anything has changed?

Mrs G - I'm glad the ball is moving! :) Hoping that May is here before we know it so that your hubby can be helped to decide what to do when he speaks to the urologist. I'm glad you've got your mum and friends to talk it through with as you get closer to knowing which route you'll be taking.

Tulip - Glad your appointment went well :) Sounds like it was a lot of information to take in! I didn't realise they could tell if it was obstructive or non-obstructive through a blood test, keeping my fingers crossed for you!

Thank you lovely ladies for coming on here and sharing. Like you say Miki, it's horrible that any of us have to go through this, but at least we can go through it together.
*Hugs*
XXX
 
Miki - Thank you for your message :) I feel that it's going to be the case for us too, making sure we've exhausted all the other options before we can consider donor sperm, if only for peace of mind that we're making the right choice. What's your appointment in May for? Is it a SA to see if anything has changed?

Thank you lovely ladies for coming on here and sharing. Like you say Miki, it's horrible that any of us have to go through this, but at least we can go through it together.
*Hugs*
XXX

Hi Rainbow! Yes, the May appointment is an SA. The doc wants to see if any change has taken place. If not, we may be flying to Seattle to discuss biopsy's and aspirations. We will be heading to IVF too. If they don't find any sperm we move on to serious talks about donor sperm.

Here's to hoping. I wish it was already May so the test could be over with. I am constantly worrying about the results and my DH's reaction.
 
Fingers crossed for everyone, i agree that this place is a god send to know that we are not alone going through this horrid rollercoaster xx:hugs:
 
The good news…after 3 months (when we got our SA of zero), dh has finally made an appointment to see a doctor! We'll see what happens there…but it is finally a step! :)

I am so sorry to hear about all of that Rainbow 123. My husband is also not liking the idea of donor sperm. Unfortunately he is the last boy in his side of the family. He has one 20 year old boy cousin but that's it. He wants to wait until every single possible option has been tested and tried before going the donor sperm route.

This is such a terrible roller coaster ride. I wish that none of us had to go through this, at least we aren't going through it alone. I am glad that your DH was willing to sit and talk to you. I have read and heard of others who won't even talk about it or their feelings.

I hope that you FS goes well and that you can get some good news.

My dh is also the last of the line on his side…no cousins with his name either. The one time we have talked about donor sperm so far he mentioned that he would think of using his uncles or his father's stuff… I am not sure how I feel about that. His kid would be his half-brother?? I don't know, sounds kind of Oedipus like to me…
 
dont think its legal to use his father............
The good news…after 3 months (when we got our SA of zero), dh has finally made an appointment to see a doctor! We'll see what happens there…but it is finally a step! :)

I am so sorry to hear about all of that Rainbow 123. My husband is also not liking the idea of donor sperm. Unfortunately he is the last boy in his side of the family. He has one 20 year old boy cousin but that's it. He wants to wait until every single possible option has been tested and tried before going the donor sperm route.

This is such a terrible roller coaster ride. I wish that none of us had to go through this, at least we aren't going through it alone. I am glad that your DH was willing to sit and talk to you. I have read and heard of others who won't even talk about it or their feelings.

I hope that you FS goes well and that you can get some good news.

My dh is also the last of the line on his side…no cousins with his name either. The one time we have talked about donor sperm so far he mentioned that he would think of using his uncles or his father's stuff… I am not sure how I feel about that. His kid would be his half-brother?? I don't know, sounds kind of Oedipus like to me…
 
[/QUOTE]

Hi Rainbow! Yes, the May appointment is an SA. The doc wants to see if any change has taken place. If not, we may be flying to Seattle to discuss biopsy's and aspirations. We will be heading to IVF too. If they don't find any sperm we move on to serious talks about donor sperm.

Here's to hoping. I wish it was already May so the test could be over with. I am constantly worrying about the results and my DH's reaction.[/QUOTE]

I hope you get a positive result Miki :hugs: The waiting is the worst bit! If they could speed up the time between appointments it would be so much easier as I know I have spent 5 months with so many questions that I need answering and so many 'what if?'s.
Have you found a specialist in Seattle? We're in the UK and have found a specialist (by looking in forums) who we're considering looking up if we're not happy with the doctors on the NHS, after we've managed to save some money up that is! Has anyone heard of Mr Ramsay at Charing Cross Hospital? He looks like he knows what he's talking about on the website I found for his clinic.
A couple of people mentioned Dr Schlegel at Cornell (which is in the USA I think!) was pretty clued up in azoospermia, not sure if that's anywhere near you?
If anyone finds a way of speeding up the time between appointments, please share! After our emotional Sunday talks, hubby and I decided that we needed to schedule in 'fun time' so that we have something fun to look forward to each weekend (to take our minds off things as I always find weekends the worst as I have too much time to think!). This Saturday we're having a 'Mexican night', including Mexican food as well as half hour tequila shots... don't know how long I will last, but we had a laugh planning it and hopefully we'll have lots of fun!
Hope we all get some positive news soon!
XXX
 
Rainbow.

Loved your post about making time for each other and fun time together.You and your hubby stay strong.

Ive heard/seen lots of people reporting about DR Ramsey, If you could share what you find out about him?

What date is your app?
My hubby is all wound up about this app and we know this is going t decide if we go for it with hubby (if we can) or if its deffo donor.

Got so many questions we need answered xxxxx
Hi Rainbow! Yes, the May appointment is an SA. The doc wants to see if any change has taken place. If not, we may be flying to Seattle to discuss biopsy's and aspirations. We will be heading to IVF too. If they don't find any sperm we move on to serious talks about donor sperm.

Here's to hoping. I wish it was already May so the test could be over with. I am constantly worrying about the results and my DH's reaction.[/QUOTE]

I hope you get a positive result Miki :hugs: The waiting is the worst bit! If they could speed up the time between appointments it would be so much easier as I know I have spent 5 months with so many questions that I need answering and so many 'what if?'s.
Have you found a specialist in Seattle? We're in the UK and have found a specialist (by looking in forums) who we're considering looking up if we're not happy with the doctors on the NHS, after we've managed to save some money up that is! Has anyone heard of Mr Ramsay at Charing Cross Hospital? He looks like he knows what he's talking about on the website I found for his clinic.
A couple of people mentioned Dr Schlegel at Cornell (which is in the USA I think!) was pretty clued up in azoospermia, not sure if that's anywhere near you?
If anyone finds a way of speeding up the time between appointments, please share! After our emotional Sunday talks, hubby and I decided that we needed to schedule in 'fun time' so that we have something fun to look forward to each weekend (to take our minds off things as I always find weekends the worst as I have too much time to think!). This Saturday we're having a 'Mexican night', including Mexican food as well as half hour tequila shots... don't know how long I will last, but we had a laugh planning it and hopefully we'll have lots of fun!
Hope we all get some positive news soon!
XXX[/QUOTE]
 
I hope you get a positive result Miki :hugs: The waiting is the worst bit! If they could speed up the time between appointments it would be so much easier as I know I have spent 5 months with so many questions that I need answering and so many 'what if?'s.
Have you found a specialist in Seattle?
Hope we all get some positive news soon!
XXX[/QUOTE]

No, not yet. Our doc has been talking to someone, but we haven't figured that part out yet. Right now we are waiting on the SA.
 
Deb (who started this forum topic) has consulted mr. Ramsay, I have heard wonderful things about that dr in the uk.

Yes dr Schlegel of Cornell is in the USA (new York). This is a first I heard of this USA one.
 

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