Developmental disorders/learning disabilities/genetic syndromes & more support group

[annanouska]

Tbh it's the violence that has me worried most. He's better at home now but can't cope with other children often . Today he was with the one friend he has ( the others aren't allowedvtomplay due to violence) got all excited crawled over and bit her I managed to intervene he does like other children but gets so hyped or something and just bits or pushes. We can't go anywhere with other children, they are monitoring him with the senco at nursery and near enough isolate him

 

[bumpin2012]

sorry sequeena. I so hope you and dh are able to get a break one night.

annanouska: it sounds frustrating. I hope this is a phase that he will grow out of. boys can be very rough, have you had him assessed by a professional, like your gp? They may be able to get you set up with a psychological arrangement ( not because I think he's crazy) and they might be able to give you some tools in helping him. Its tough to have concerns and no answers.

 

[sun]

I caught this from Alex on camera last night - shes trying to say "row row row"
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151864565294318&l=4642676176673133162

Oh that's fantastic!! xo

 

[essie0828]

Awww I can't get the link to work But well done Alex

 

[Peanut78]

I'm sitting in the airport with really sporadic internet access - but Anna just wanted to quickly say there was a thread on dealing with violence here on the Special Needs board not so long ago - have a look for it.

Sequeena, hugs on the sleep

AP, can't wait to view the video!

 

[annanouska]

Thank you peanut I've had a look and picked up some good advice

It's is going to sound very in pc but.... Lo seriously only seems to get along with children with additional needs. Today we met a deaf boy with developmental delays he was 6 and he and lo did great together. I think it's because some children with additional needs are not phased by pain so if lo grabs ( not to hurt just grabs he's moved off) it doesn't seem to frighten them.

Sequeena, a soft play cater near us is running autism nights. May be Roth seeg. If one near you does it for T. The lady said non autistic children who have 'autistic like' needs are also welcome, basically its to keep the hyper usual kiddos out but if your lo has some markers or displays similar behaviour traits its ok to go. Thought was nice of them to ru. It .

How is everyone?

X

 

[essie0828]

Peanut I read that dealing with violence thread to! Useful info for us as well. Thanks

Anna my DD isn't put off by pain at all as well. It's a constant struggle to keep her from getting scuffed up. She never cries at pain. She burned her right thumb pretty bad at my moms on the stove there and never indicated pain at all. I didn't even see it till we got home hours later! She never favored it or cried or anything. I felt terrible when I did find it . Her brain just doesn't process pain like ours. Personally I would have whined for days And like your little one she can get grabby with other kids and not realize that pinch hurts. It's kinda frustrating. DD usually ends up playing with adults only

 

[essie0828]

Off topic but I made cottage pie for the first time yesterday. It was really good! DH and DD really put it away

 

[sequeena]

Thomas doesn't feel pain often either. He has scratches, cuts, bruises etc and never whinges. Sometimes though he'll go mental over something small, like when he falls over but doesn't break the skin. Madness

Woo for cottage pie a proper british dish. Mmmm love it

T had a MASSIVE meltdown going to and from the shop. It's quiet where I live so him screaming and screaming in the front garden whilst I was opening the front door was mortifying.

 

[annanouska]

I don't think Marcus has a meltdown as bad as others but it seems it to me sometimes I just hate doing anything.

Have u tried him with now and then cards etc to prepare him. I know he's not been diagnosed with ASD but you said a few flags for him. We used these a lot in the special needs school i worked in. I don't know why I didn't think of it before but I've made some now for lo and one flashcard more as his speech is poor and struggles with frustration of it.

He is still very young I kno but I think he is quite *bright* in one ways and can't express it o it helps. His delays in walking contribute s lot I think xxx

 

[sequeena]

We have flash cards but unfortunately Thomas only recognises pictures of cats, dogs, cars and trains. He doesn't understand what shop, park etc. He does know that if I say where are your shoes that it means we're going out but that's it. The understanding will come in time so I'm sure we'll get there.

As for the disability group we have a SNAC where we can take disabled children it's the only one in South Wales. There's also a soft play that does special needs days. Problem is T doesn't sleep so we can't make it to their morning sessions hopefully once we get a handle on the sleep we can do more together.

 

[sun]

I don't think Marcus has a meltdown as bad as others but it seems it to me sometimes I just hate doing anything.

Have u tried him with now and then cards etc to prepare him. I know he's not been diagnosed with ASD but you said a few flags for him. We used these a lot in the special needs school i worked in. I don't know why I didn't think of it before but I've made some now for lo and one flashcard more as his speech is poor and struggles with frustration of it.

He is still very young I kno but I think he is quite *bright* in one ways and can't express it o it helps. His delays in walking contribute s lot I think xxx

Is he cruising/crawling yet? If your LO isn't even 15mo he's not delayed with walking at all yet - here 18+ months walking is considered delayed. Loads of children I know started walking between 14-16 months and are totally typical in their development. And with flashcards - I don't think any non-delayed kiddos I know would have been able to do flashcards so young. Have you tried signing with him? We were just at a birthday party and lots of the kids under 18mo did most of their communication via signing. It is a great way to bridge that gap until they start talking. Lots of the time they want to communicate, but can't yet so it really adds to their frustration and tantrums/acting out. Before my daughter started talking at 20mo she had 10 signs she used regularly and it really helped us. Now at 23mo, she has about 100 words.

 

[sun]

We have flash cards but unfortunately Thomas only recognises pictures of cats, dogs, cars and trains. He doesn't understand what shop, park etc. He does know that if I say where are your shoes that it means we're going out but that's it. The understanding will come in time so I'm sure we'll get there.

As for the disability group we have a SNAC where we can take disabled children it's the only one in South Wales. There's also a soft play that does special needs days. Problem is T doesn't sleep so we can't make it to their morning sessions hopefully once we get a handle on the sleep we can do more together.

I did flash cards with my son and I started by making them myself with photos and cutouts (like cut out the picture he recognized on the cereal box or a pic of his favourite car because he didn't associate a pic of a generic car with his own toy). I found that pics of things we actually owned or places around us were way more effective than stock pics on cards you buy. I used them in addition to signing. Also my son didn't always associate certain images with certain things the way I did. His favourite museum is the aviation museum and I would try and show a pic of the museum or the sign or big planes, but what really resonated was a pic of the little toy ride-on planes they have there. That really signified the museum and made the association for him. Same with parks - the park no, but a pic of his toy car on the slide, yes. A little trial and error, but made a big difference. Hugs! xo

 

[annanouska]

I have a book on signing because the groups are so expensive but nursery won't use sign so wondered how he would do.

He was flagged as delayed because at 13 months he couldn't physically put his feet on the floor, if you tried to get him up to stand he couldn't/wouldn't he would cry and lift his feet or go to his knees instantly. He randomly then started pulling to stand and on the same day cruising down tHe sofa which was so odd as he couldn't even put his feet on the floor . Wen he stood tho his feet wouldn't be almost pointing backwards and bent in funny. This was due to his hyper mobility in his knees and ankles. His physio has helped a lot along with his swimming and in 2 months he's standing a lot more "normal". He may still need special boots when he walks but we can't check that until he does

Hope everyone is ok

X

 

[essie0828]

Sun that's fantastic thinking to take pics of things your lo actually has. And the heart of the museum being the kiddie rides in his perspective Ahhh kids are so sweet. Bless him. I'm going to do this with DD.

Sequeena for you and little T. It has to be a strain when he won't sleep. How much does he actually sleep in a 24 hr period? On a typical day? And a bad day? Here an occupational therapist will help with sleep issues. I didn't know that until DDs first session. He said some kids need deep pressure and other sensory processing aids to sleep. There were weighted teddy bears, a large swing hanging from the ceiling that's supposed to be slept in, different textured surfaces to lay on........all kinds of different tools to create the perfect environment for each child. It's really awesome! Could your try for an occupational therapy referral because of Ts lack of sleep? It may help you to find that perfect storm of events that will get T sleeping.

Anna

 

[sun]

I have a book on signing because the groups are so expensive but nursery won't use sign so wondered how he would do.

He was flagged as delayed because at 13 months he couldn't physically put his feet on the floor, if you tried to get him up to stand he couldn't/wouldn't he would cry and lift his feet or go to his knees instantly. He randomly then started pulling to stand and on the same day cruising down tHe sofa which was so odd as he couldn't even put his feet on the floor . Wen he stood tho his feet wouldn't be almost pointing backwards and bent in funny. This was due to his hyper mobility in his knees and ankles. His physio has helped a lot along with his swimming and in 2 months he's standing a lot more "normal". He may still need special boots when he walks but we can't check that until he does

Hope everyone is ok

X

My son also has hypermobility in his knees and ankles and took longer to walk. I've found with hypermobile kiddos that the joints stabilize with time. My son's foot used to bend right up and touch his calf, but now at 4 it doesn't and he is much more solid with his footing. Once he was walking he had a very hard time on uneven surfaces due to the hypermobility (he also has hypotonia which added to it), but again that improved and now he is doing so well. Hugs! x

 

[sequeena]

A weighted blanket is what I'm looking into

In 24 hours? If he naps he'll sleep about 7 hours that's if he does his usual pattern of 1 hour nap bed at 8 up at 9 awake until 1am and up at 8am (with waking if he's in his bed without waking if he's in ours)? If he doesn't nap then its usually 6. He does sometimes go a bit more but it's pretty horrific especially as he's only 2.

He did go only 5 hours in a 24 hour period. That was really tough. It's ehy I always say a newborn is easier for me to handle.

 

[sun]

Sequeena - Lots of mamas I know have had loads of success with weighted blankets! I really hope you find something that works. xo

 

[sequeena]

If I could keep co sleeping I would but I've really had enough. Almost 2 years of it full time is enough. I'm feeling trapped now and miss cuddling up to oh. It's impacted on our relationship and as T is so difficult I just need space. That's probably a bad thing to say but it's how I feel.

 

[essie0828]

A weighted blanket is what I'm looking into

In 24 hours? If he naps he'll sleep about 7 hours that's if he does his usual pattern of 1 hour nap bed at 8 up at 9 awake until 1am and up at 8am (with waking if he's in his bed without waking if he's in ours)? If he doesn't nap then its usually 6. He does sometimes go a bit more but it's pretty horrific especially as he's only 2.

He did go only 5 hours in a 24 hour period. That was really tough. It's ehy I always say a newborn is easier for me to handle.

Oh dear! That's definitely not a lot of sleep for a guy so little. The weighted blanket may be a good idea for us as well. DD doesn't self settle and we still co sleep.