Disco Derail! - TTCAL/PAL Discussion and Support!

[sequeena]

I am an aries

I am so over 2010. Can't wait for it to fuck off and die!! I have dealt with so much shit this year, 2 losses, my bank account being wiped clean, fraud, my sexual abuse, court, depression, self harm/overdose, my family telling me they don't care about me etc.

And now Sean can't even have the night off for our anniversary!

I am done! Bollocks to it!

 

[heart tree]

I'm a Libra. Tim's a Gemini. My balanced scales balance his twins. Yeah right!

I had my first loss on Christmas Eve 2008. I literally took the balloons that were at the bar I was at on New Years and stomped on them. I hated 2008.

2009, I managed to get pregnant (after 8 cycles of trying, hear that Nato?) but didn't have my second loss until early 2010. Then my third loss in 2010. Oh yeah, and my dad suffered a traumatic brain injury in 2010.

2010 can suck my ass! I HATED this year more than any other!!!!

I also am not a New Years girl. In SF, everything is more expensive on that night and you can never find a taxi. It's a miserable night. That being said, I will relish in kicking 2010 to the gutter where it belongs.

2010 = Jerky b-astard

 

[Dazed]

Hi girls. Sorry everyone is having a shit day it seems like.
Nato- Don't give up
Sassy - I say tell your mom.
Meg - Glad you will get your answer by Christmas for the IVF
As for me... Time is going by too damn slow. I'm a pisces and 2010 can KISS MY PATOOT!!!

 

[Allie84]

Yep, 2010 can totally kiss my ass, as well!! <----What I want to do to 2010

I was just recently thinking it's been the worst year of mine so far.

I don't particularly like New Year's either- I share Nato's sentiment that it pretty much means going back to work and shit weather! Also, the expectation of the night never lives up to it's hype. But I'm with Sugar, if I don't have my BFP by then, I am going to get SUPER drunk. My EDD was around New Years. Luckily I was never dated exactly so I don't know the exact due date.

I'm an Aquarius! I don't know much about astrology, though. I am not one for psychics and conception readings but I did get my plam read in California once and it said I was going to get a divorce. At the time I thought, "No way!" but my marriage has been rocky the past few months. Who knows.

Welcome, whyme! :wave: Sorry for your loss.

Nato, sorry about another BFN. Curses to the universe.

Mone, I wish I knew what to say. All of your feelings are totally valid. There is nothing wrong with greiving. Don't be embarassed.I think you should keep up your meds and wait it out until next week though so you aren't left wondering "What if?" But I won't tell you your gut feelings are wrong. I have been there knowing I was going to miscarry while the doctor told me "Congratuations!" We are all here for you.

Sassy, what a tough situation. I don't know what I'd do. I would say tell your mum but at the same time I know what you mean about wanting her to make her own decision. What does Danny think? I know you'll make the right decision.

 

[Megg33k]

Sorry you're another unlucky Pisces, Dazed. This year was supposed to be amazing for us!

So, for those of you who have had a D&C/ERPC... My bleeding has turned heavier today, now I'm crampy and passing some stringy bits of tissue. Is this reasonably normal? I mean, I have an appointment in a couple of days... but I'm just wondering if its a problem. I'm not hemorrhaging or anything... but I'm SO uncomfortable and the tissue has thrown me off. I'm pissed off... this is exactly like a MC, but I wasn't fucking pregnant. What gives?

 

[Allie84]

Gosh, Megg, I don't know. I hope someone with experience will pipe in. As long it's not enough you're worried about blood loss, I would imagine you'd be okay for a few days. I think I'd maybe call the doctor tomorrow and speak to someone and ask for sure, though, at least to put your mind at ease.

 

[Megg33k]

Thanks! I might have to do that... Its just a miserable way to live at the moment. I'm definitely not concerned about blood loss. Its not THAT bad. Its just more than before and sort of painful and icky.

 

[dawny690]

Sassy good luck tomorrow hun to everyone who needs one xxxx

 

[heart tree]

Ok, a proper response to this very emotional day for all:

Megg, I have no idea what all this bleeding is about. I know I bled for a while after my first loss, but I was pregnant! I really have no idea what is going on with that bod of yours. Clearly it would be an issue if you were hemorrhaging, but you aren’t. Hmmm…

Hoping, I hope O is near for you. Are you giving it a go this cycle?

Nato, I have similar fears. I have a long history of being a party girl. I never smoked ciggies, but certainly other things that I’d also rather not mention. I’ll join you and Vic on the naughty iceberg! I had a lot of fun. I never went overboard, just had fun from time to time. But, I wonder now if it affected my fertility in some way. I believe there are small tweaks perhaps. Has your husband had a sperm analysis? There are supplements that can help his swimmers. You may have a blocked tube that an HSG (dye) test can help clear. It took me 8 cycles to get pregnant my second time. This is not the end for you!

By the way, it is too early for you to be talking about “other options” with your husband. You haven’t even done enough testing to warrant that kind of talk. Even my doctor said “other options” weren’t worth talking about yet. Of course you aren’t ready to accept that conversation as part of your reality.

Also, you need to stay away from Google. It is making you crazy!

Sassy, looks like you already figured out what you are going to do with your mom. That is a tough situation. You have to do what you think is right for you and your mom. Good luck tomorrow honey. Can’t wait to hear about the beans.

Lucy, good luck with your appointment tomorrow. They need to throw every test at you now. Enough is enough.

Sparks, ugh, due dates are the worst. TWW isn’t much better. What a hard week for you. I’m thinking of you chick and looking forward to hearing about your BFP.

CJ, I can’t believe what happened at work! That sounds terrifying. How are you? I can’t wait to hear about your bloods.

Why me, welcome. So glad to meet you. I think I’ve run across you elsewhere. Have they talked about removing the fibroid? It sounds like that could be a possibility of why it is hard to conceive this time around.

Allie, I’m sorry you are feeling strain in your marriage. Is it just ttc or is it other things? Have you thought of couples counseling? It can do wonders for a relationship.

Mone, it is far to early to make any decisions right now. You are in shock. You need time to let this news settle. You need time to integrate this into your reality. You may or may not want to try again but now is not the time to make that decision. You are not terrible to want to end the pregnancy. I know I’ve felt the same way. Until it is over, you can’t move on.

Mel, beautiful bump in your journal. Cazza also a gorgeous piccy in your avatar! Cesca, good luck at your appointment as well. Will we get a new picture from you?

Amy, how are you doing honey? Tough week for you.

And last but certainly not least, Vicky, good luck tomorrow. I can’t imagine anything but good news.

So sorry if I missed anyone. Was trying to read back and respond to everyone.

Whew, that was long. See you all tomorrow!

 

[Megg33k]

Thanks, Hearty! Apparently there are people who bleed a good 2 weeks after ERPC/D&C... I think its just the combo of the surgery with the withdrawal bleed from the BCP put together that is working against me. I've been assured that its not abnormal... So, I'll trudge on in misery until it stops!

 

[Razcox]

Hey all well i am another Pisces who had another really shitty 2010 so mistic meg can shove that up her arse! My grandad died, my DH lost his job, i had a MMC and didnt get any of the jobs i applied for to get away from my shitty job i hate! Oh well 2011 will either start off really well or really awful as my 12 week scan will be due mid dec . . .

Vicky - Good luck today hun, looking forward to your new ticker and some piccys xx

 

[vickyd]

Morning all!

Megg ive had 2 D&Cs, i bled for a solid 2 weeks and some of those days pretty heavily. I also passed stringy blood, black blood, and clotty blood! Delightful isnt it? Its completely normal so dont worry too much about it.

So my countdown begins...Hearty you say you cant imagine anything but good news and i cant imagine anything but bad! Mone you said you were the picture of dispair before and during your scan, i can relate as that will be me today just like during my NT scan. I was balling before i entered the building, during the fuckin 1 hour wait to be seen, throughout the scan bla bla bla. Today will be worse cause its a long scan as well. I will keep my eyes shut and hope for the best...

 

[prgirl_cesca]

Although hopefully my 2010 will end on a high, it has been a pretty awful year. Health wise with my hideous infection from Bali, workwise as I was up for redundancy in february and although I stayed employed with a good job I now have to work with a complete prick every day who makes my blood boil, then one MC in March and another a couple of days after my birthday in May. So the first half of 2010 i've spent in pain (mentally and physically) and mostly drunk.

The latter half has been fantastic obviously in terms of getting pregnant again and it going well so far (I managed to hear the heartbeat last night on my friend's doppler which was amazing) but i've still got a long way to go in Nov/Dec and I will be happy happy happy to see the end of 2010.

I'm excited about 2011, 11 has always been my lucky nummber all my life. I am a taurean, not sure if that makes a difference.

 

[dawny690]

Good luck vicky hope its good news for you today not sure of your story but hope it has a happy ending I have my gynocologist today but not sure if i'll get time to update today but will try xxxx

 

[LucyJ]

Vicky and Sassy thinking of you both today much love and lots of positive thoughts coming your way.

Megg it does sound normal I was told if the bleeding suddenly got worse after about 5 days and very painful then to go and see my dr. After my first erpc I ended up back in a&e about 6 days after having it done as I was passing massive blood clots and was doubled up in pain everything was alright but this time I took it much easier and the bleeding hasnt been anywhere near as bad but have had small clots varying in colour from black to red and stringy blood. Just keep an eye on it and if gets a lot worse or the pain gets worse then get it checked but I'm sure its all ok its one of those things were everyone reacts differently so whats normal for one person isnt normal for the next I've had two done and reacted differently each time. Its never easier with our bodies is it?

 

[Dazed]

Good Luck Vic.

 

[Razcox]

Ohh forgot Sassy and her scan, cant believe its been two weeks already. Good luck today hun and cant wait to hear about your two little beans x

 

[dawny690]

Right results time .................................................................... I went to the gynocologist today and just chatting about the polyp surgery etc (they still refuse for hubby to be there while im put to sleep but will provide some nurse support or something for me which is good I suppose) and they asked if I had tried to lose weight so I say yes but its not really working and the lady made me ed when she said "well it is harder to lose weight when you have Polycystic ovary syndrome" my mouth must have hit the floor because no one not doctors or other health profession has wanted to admit I have PCOS or tell me I have it til today I just had a feeling I had it and I was right. Anyway they have taken full bloods and I will be going for a scan to check the polyp to see if its still there or if it has grown/shrunk/gone then I will be back there 1st feb 2011 for a full referral into reccurent mc's Im so happy someone is recognising my lost babies it makes me with happiness obviously I would be happier if anyone of them was here with me and im :sad: they aren't here but they are watching over me to help their mummy get them an earth brother or sister I love each and everyone of my babies and miss them lots but they are my shining stars and definatly were with me today helping get answers as to why they had to leave us I swear I felt a presence in that consulantion room today a nice presence though sorry for the long winded post xxxx

 

[msarkozi]

Thanks Hearty....I didn't realize anyone else checked out my journal.....

Vicky - you will feel more relaxed (until the next time) after your scan today. Your little girl will be doing great

waiting for Sassy to post some more news....her journal said good and bad news....

hello to the rest of the girls

 

[LucyJ]

Waiting as well mel hope she's alright.

How are you and your little boy doing?