Disco Derail! - TTCAL/PAL Discussion and Support!

[LucyJ]

Vicky glad your feeling better what time is your scan on thursday?

Meg I am so sorry I dont know what to suggest it is all so confusing can you talk to a dr about things? Don't give up sweetie thinking of you

Mel how are you feeling?

 

[Megg33k]

No appointments available at my doc's office, but she's there from 3-10pm... So, I can walk in and wait for an in between appointment. I guess that's what I shall do! I bet she cringes when she sees me coming!

 

[LucyJ]

I bet she cringes when she sees me coming!

know what you mean think my dr must be sick of seeing me.

Hope it goes well and you get somewhere with your dr let us know what doc says.

 

[prgirl_cesca]

PS. One thing that will really cheer me up this month is to see some of your lovely ladies get your BFP

That helps me too, otherwise i'd lose all hope.

On this end I've been grabbing my boobs all day hoping for them to be sore but nothing so far

Haha! Be careful with them!

I'm not sure what to do from here. I'm pretty lost at the moment.

I feel so bad for you, just try and keep positive.

I'm on CD13 today and not even a hint of a peak on my fertility monitor and I have no idea what to think/do. Especially given my last two cycles have been 31/29 days respectively, I would've thought I'd be at that point by now.

God, first I have to deal with being really fertile but losing the baby, now I have to deal with not ovulating???

 

[msarkozi]

I am feeling pretty good Lucy, thanks. I haven't been taking my diclectin, and the nausea is staying away, so I am happy about that. Just going to be heading out soon to visit with my BFF. She is leaving tomorrow for holidays, so it's my last visit with her

 

[Jaymes]

I'm here. Just really tired lately, if I'm not working (or eating) I'm usually sleeping. I read every day, but feel like I'm having a hard time not being super nervous & scared.

 

[Allie84]

Hi everyone!

Lucy, awww, sounds like a fabulous anniversary.

Vicky, glad you're feeling better

Mel, enjoy your BFF time and happy to hear the nausea is subsiding.

Megg, best of luck at the docs if you go wait. I used to go to the on-campus health clinic so often at university I was embarassed when I walked in and had to check in with the same receptionist every time haha.

Cesca, it's probably a bit early given the 31 day cycle? I have no idea when I actually ovulate but I think it's not until CD21! If it's a 31 day cycle for you it's maybe around CD17. Good luck!

Jaymes, and I know what you mean...

Today is 10dpo (I think) so I tested with FMU and BFN. But as I was staring at the test I was so scared, and part of me was hoping for the BFN! I was slightly relieved that it was a BFN but then I felt bad that it wasn't BFP. It's like I am scared of a BFP but dissapionted without one. I was really confused when I felt myself hoping the line didn't appear...since I've spent every day this cycle thinking about getting (and staying) pregnant.

I know it's still early and I could get that BFP but it weirds me out that my emotions are all over. I got the BFP on 10dpo last time. And of course I have that big fear I've mentioned which is that since I got the BFP on my first ever ntnp cycle, and then had the mc, that I'm somehow jinxed and it will be really hard from now on. I know it's not logical but it just seemed too easy last time and then it got snatched away from me so soon after....

Blah, I'm rambling, sorry girls. I'm at my nannying job and the baby is sleeping and the older girl has gone to a friend's so I'm sitting her contemplatively...maybe I should go clean or something!

 

[vickyd]

Allie you make perfect sence hun...I was exactly the same way, part releived for a bfn and when i got the bfp i didnt feel happy just petrified!!!! I think its only natural that our emotions are all over the place so just go with it for now!

I went to my best mates after work, i love her to death but she got pregnant last July less than a month after i had to terminate my pregnancy so its always hard to see her and the baby. To make things even more difficult we have the same doc ( i made the referal and intorduction) so as soon as she opens the door today she asks are you preggo???? Im like what???? Turns out she called to book an appointment on Thursday and doc is like "do you want to come with Vicky at 6.30???????!!!!!!!! He didnt say why i was going but come on it doesnt take a rocket scientist!!!!!!! I just didnt want anyone to know yet as both times i told everyone almost straight away and now think that im jinxing it GRRRRRR!!!!
Hubby thinks im ********!!!!

 

[LucyJ]

Allie I know how you feel it's a weird situation we all want to get our BFP's but the fear of suffereing a further loss is always there I think its as Meg said we all want babies rather than BFP's.

Fear isn't logical and your bound to have mixed feelings I know I spend each month wishing and hoping that I'll be pregnant again but know as soon as I am I will be so scared but each month I'm not I feel so sad.

10 dpo may just be to early so you could still get your BFP and we are all here for you. Feel free to ramble away to you.

I'm keeping everything crossed for you.

 

[LucyJ]

Vicky you still havent told anyone they have just found out so it is different.

 

[msarkozi]

well apparently I found a food that makes me throw up, so we will be avoiding that for now! I had a great visit with my BFF. When we hugged, it was a long hug, and I just didn't want to let her go. I almost cried. Love her to death!

It is definitely normal to feel that way. After a person has gone through a loss, you have different emotions because you are scared of what a BFP means and what could happen. It's ok to feel that way.

Jaymes, so sorry you are tired. Hope you are getting some rest

Vicky, I can't believe your doctor asked if she wanted to come with you. It's a good thing he is hot, otherwise you would have to slap him.

Meg, Lucy - hope you girls are well.

Is Amy getting married right away? We haven't seen her for awhile, but I couldn't remember when her wedding is.....

Hi to Cesca as well

 

[Jaymes]

I told my dh to go back on his meds that he can't take while we are ttc today. I was going to make him wait till I was at least 8w5d, but I figured he can't put his life and overall health on hold until we have a healthy baby, and if I loose this one I may not want to ttc again.
I am so excited and terrified at the same time. I think that is why I feel so exhausted. My emotions are continuously at war with themselves and it is leaving me with a completely crappy overall feeling. I hate feeling so out of sync and out of control.
I've taken to poking my belly and saying "stay". Someone is going to catch me doing that and 1) think I'm a total loon (which I am) and 2) figure out that I'm pregnant again. I have no problem with this as I am a terrible liar and I hate not being able to celebrate every moment I possibly have with this baby. I want everyone to know so I don't have to hide my joy, or my sorrow if I loose this one. Dh wants to keep it secret as long as we can, and it makes me feel like when the hot guy in highschool calls you his girlfriend, but tells you that you can't tell anyone about it. It totally irritates me.

I'm rambling now. Love you people. Muah!

 

[Allie84]

Hi everyone.

Well, I've had a crap evening. After work I went to see my parents and my mom could barely breathe! We took her to the emergency room and now she is in intenstive care with pneumonia!!! She is so stubborn...if I hadn't gone over there and saw how ill she was she'd probably sit at home and die in denial! It's not like she's old and senile, she's just stubborn. I'm really sad and upset. My dad couldn't convince her to go in but eventually OH, me and my dad carried her to the hospital. I don't know how I'm going to sleep tonight...I still really don't think I have a bean but if I do this probably isn't good for it....may i ask for prayers/positive thoughts on her behalf? Thank you everyone....

 

[Jaymes]

Allie, that sounds awful! I will pray and think super positive thoughts for both your mother and you.

 

[msarkozi]

Jaymes - that is so cute - you poking your belly and saying stay

Allie - I am sorry about your mom. I will say a prayer for her and keep her in my thoughts

 

[LucyJ]

Allie I am so sorry your mum is in my thoughts!

Jaymes rabble away thats what we are here for you sending positive thoughts to you and your little one.

Aww Mel its hard leaving close friends but I'm glad you had a good time with your BFF. I'm alright thanks getting a bit nervous about my ultrasound tomorrow (having an external and internal one done) I want answers but guess I'm abit scared that they'll find something nasty.

Meg how did you get on at dr's? Vicky how are you feeling?

to all

 

[vickyd]

Morning ladies!
I had a bad night, woke up practically choking on vomit!!!!!!!!!! I rushed to the bathroom, nothing really came out but i was having difficulty breathing from the heaving!!!
Anyhoo...Then went on to have really odd dreams where i was engaged in sexy acts with various clients at work so i woke up kinda embarrased and a bit guilty feeling lol!

Allie so sorry to hear about your mother, hopefully shell be ok hun!
Jaymie i know how ya feel doll, im pretty much in the same loony situation myself!!!

Megg did you manage to see the doc hun?

 

[prgirl_cesca]

Allie - sorry about your mum I hope she feels better soon.

CD14 and still NO sign of fecking ovulation. This is so annoying. To top it off I have caught a nasty cold and I'm sat at work in a back room because my 'work from home' plan failed as we had a huge powercut and I'm too sick/too rough looking to be on reception with the general public!

I had my full bloods done this morning and my GOD it was so much blood! She had to fill about 12 little vials, so she made me lie down! Just the 3 weeks to wait for results now...

 

[Megg33k]

Allie! Lots of positive thoughts headed your way!

Sounds like everyone had a crap night! all around!

I called my doctor's office last night and was told that it was packed and I'd likely not get in to see her even if I went. I think it has something to do with the heat and people not staying in when everything says they should.... So heat stroke runs rampant. Anyway, she said I'd be best advised to show up at 8am this morning when the doors open to get in quickly... and I woke up at 8:20! I didn't set an alarm, because I didn't think I'd need to. I went to sleep at 10pm last night for chrissake! But, apparently I DID need to. Now not sure how to proceed. Bah... I'll get there before the end of today.

 

[vickyd]

Always set an alarm girl!!!!!!!!!!!