Okay... I got there at 10:25am. There were 2 guys and one woman with 2 children who she didn't seem to need to have any control over waiting already. I really thought I'd never get to see her, as I figured I'd already be in prison for slaying the stupid woman and her obnoxious kids. They were jumping on the chairs, running around, trying to climb the wall while holding on to the receptionist's ledge, panting like dogs, flipping over chairs, playing some "game" where they would hold their hands up to their eyes like binoculars and ask each other "Are you in 1 piece or 2 pieces?" and whatever the other one said was always the wrong answer... This game is very loud, and it went on forever. One of them proceeded to go to the parking lot alone (at maybe 7?) and came back in spilling an entire McDonald's breakfast platter on the floor... pancakes, hashbrown, eggs, etc. Some poor girl came in right after me who had a 10:30am appointment and sat through all of this too. The 2 guys got called in, but I got called in before the woman with the kids or the girl with an appointment... odd, but okay. It was 11:30am I think? So, not ages, but felt like ages.
Anyway, the nurse comes in to do blood pressure and temp and says to me "Do you not have a gynecologist set up yet?" I told her that I didn't have one I liked at the moment. Keep in mind, my paperwork stated my reason for the visit was "discuss lab results" because that was part of it. Anyway, she then says, "Well, you need to get that done, because she can't keep doing this. It isn't her job." She's referring to my doctor, in case you wondered. Odd... Its not my doctor's job to discuss my test results with me? Because, I think it might be!
Well, my blood pressure was 149/84. I wonder why! I was annoyed with the kids, fuming about what the nurse said... OF COURSE IT WAS HIGH!
My doctor comes in and is perfectly nice. I keep my thoughts about the nurse to myself, because I didn't want to taint the appointment with that at the very beginning. First, I explain that I've been eating better and trying to be more active to no avail (my 10lb loss seems to fluctuate on the day... some days its 10lbs, some days its 1lb... I think my scale sucks). Anyway, we talked about that for a bit. She said that she thinks I might be gaining some muscle mass, which I doubt... but it was nice to hear. Then, she said that she also thought I might be retaining some water because of the weather, so I had probably lost even if the scale wasn't showing it. We moved on from there for the moment.
Then, I asked about the 2nd fertility clinic referral. She said they won't even return her calls anymore. So, that's out. She said that some specialty places here (fertility clinics, child psychologists, etc) only accept referrals from ONE of the 3 hospitals. So, they're probably ignoring her because she's not with their "preferred" hospital. What a bunch of shit. Anyway, I told her about the FS I hated leaving the clinic I'd been to and some new guy taking over. She asked me to call right then and get a consult scheduled, so I did. I have an appointment on Aug 28 @ 10:30am.
I asked her about my progesterone level and showed her my chart. She said that she actually wondered if it had been done on the wrong day, because my level was almost double what it had been every other time it was checked. After seeing my chart, she said without question that I had it done 3 days too late. She agrees 100% that I did ovulate and my level barely rises afterward. She confirmed that it could have caused everything, because it probably didn't ever rise enough to sustain an embryo past the very, very beginning stage and never got high enough to have the sharp drop required to instigate the bleed. She all but said "mystery solved." She also agreed with me splitting my chart and calling this CD4, even though there was no bleed other than the super light spotting. Apparently, there wouldn't be much to shed since I probably didn't form much of a lining anyway. So, I really did have it all figured out!
Maybe I should just get the degree to make my life easier.
Although, she wants to wait for the FS to prescribe the progesterone supplements, because she said they would know more about the dosage and whatnot.
Anyway, we touched back on the weight thing, and she asked if I'd consider not trying this cycle and going back on Phentermine. Well, with the FS appointment coming up, I didn't really want to try this cycle anyway, because I don't have my post-O progesterone supplements... So, it would just end in heartbreak again anyway. Obviously, I agreed right away. Phentermine is how I lost the weight before, so I'm more than happy to do it that way again. She stressed that I absolutely couldn't TTC while taking it, but the paperwork tells a different story and my old OB/GYN who prescribed it said it would be fine. So, I'm not quite convinced, even though I'm perfectly happy with not trying this cycle.
So, I do feel like I got somewhere. I feel like I have the answer I needed. Knowing that I wasn't talking nonsense about the test being done the wrong day and whatnot feels really good. I'm also glad she isn't so closed-minded that the number on the paper is the end-all-be-all of things... That she wasn't so high and mighty (like so many doctors are) to admit that there are flaws in blood tests because of human error. She was absolutely certain that I had it right though... She said she absolutely didn't believe I hadn't ovulated. So, I did ovulate on CD25... and I had a fairly normal cycle... other than terrible freaking progesterone levels.
I mentioned the estrogen dominance thing, and she doesn't think that's what I'm dealing with. So, we didn't go any further into that option.
All in all, I came away very happy. I didn't quite get what I hoped for, but I got something better! I got my freaking answer! I'm quite certain as to why I've lost my babies... and I think we can now prevent it from happening again for the same reason! Obviously, something can always go wrong that's not within our control, but I will NEVER allow another to be lost due to insufficient progesterone levels! I feel so free, vindicated, hopeful... but I do feel a bit sad that I didn't have a chance to prove it before losing the 2nd one, as I was pretty sure that this was the problem even back then... even before losing the first one! It was just that no one would listen to me!
Either way... I have my answer now... I can't live in the past! Apparently I needed to live through what I've lived through to be allowed to find my answer. So, that's the way it is and I can move forward... ONWARD AND UPWARD!
Megg, We're all here holding your hand in spirit... I hope you find your answers soon.
Great!
