fed up of being told breast is best!!!

[nada87]

i prefer to bf but my ds wouldn't latch on and prefered the bottle (i'm sure this is because they gave him one in the hospital when i was in recovery) so i pumped for him but wasn't able to keep up my supply. after a while (3 mo) i was only giving him a few bottles of ebm and the rest formula. my brother his wife and my mom believe in only bfing. i used to mix the formula right before we got to my moms house and tell her is was bm so she wouldnt give me crap about it. that said everyone else pushed formula on me--the hospital sent me home with some, the health visitor tried to convince me that formula was a good choice she even said "we just like to make sure the babies are getting enough to eat" in america i think bfing is weird and ff the norm.

 

[Dragonfly]

I wouldnt let my child have formula and I am glad I am able to breastfeed. Thats how I feel anyway. I wasnt asked at all how I was feeding I was going to formula feed till I looked up all the facts. They where giving milk out in my hospital and the amount of poeple saying how bad breastfeeding was to me had me put off so I got the opposite. I let my son breastfeed when he was born, he is doing great despite people thinking because he isnt formula fed he isnt getting enough still. I am sick of hearing poeple say to me why didnt I give my son formula! and no midwife actually giving info on breastfeeding and one tiny leaflet in my hospital and a poster in polish on how to breastfeed. Its scary when you are pregnant breastfeeding, I didn't like the sound of it at all and was worried. Totally changed when my son was born for me. I am still breastfeeding and we are happy. Even if everyone else isnt around me. I believe its best and the way to go. Sadly not everyone does.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

I don't think anyone thinks breast isnt best but sadly not everyone can breastfeed, don't get enough support or whatever reason that have for not breastfeeding
x

 

[Dragonfly]

True, I wasnt given any help or support , I used the internet to find info. Its really bad where I live for support so to the OP I live in the other side where no help or info was offered. I was told not to breastfeed by friends as it was the midwives way of saving the NHS money by not giving out free formula. I was only ever asked once in my booking app how I intended to feed and then I said formula and it wasnt questioned. I wish they would give out more info and help to mums it wasnt easy starting off and wouldnt be surprised most gave up. PLus with so many interventions now and sometimes problems at birth mums cant always breastfeed babies. Long as everyone knows the benefits and makes informed choices then thats great.

Also hate it when poeple defend why they didnt breastfeed just because I do. I dont ask for that or need that. Where all good mums not one is better than the other. I was formula feed and dont think less of my mum .

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

It's sad isn't it. I believe mums who wish to BF need to be supported from the start. I remember being in hospital when Aidan was 3 hours old and I rang the bell for help to get him latched and a lady walked in and asked what was up. I explained and she said "Just feed him" And walked out. I tried to get him to latch and he tried aswell but really struggled and by the time a MW came back we were both very distressed.

I am happy for you, that you over came that initial stage and breastfed. I am now in two minds whether to do it next time as that experiance put me off
xx

 

[Dragonfly]

I was in tears breastfeeding in hospital it was so sore and all they said tyo me was that I was doing it wrong and not showing me the right way. I was ignored completely and the formula feeding mums where helped. They wouldnt even take William off me when I wanted the loo and I had an emergency c section and was fecked after labour for walking. I went through months of bleeding nipples and pain and when I showed HV and docs they didnt know what it was!!! ,loads of help they where, not. I found out from here it was cracked nipples and what cream to get and that really really helped. Thank god I found this forum! I wouldnt be surprised if anyone gave in I near did so many times. Instead if scaring and pressuring mums into it when pregnant they should show when baby is born and have things like these creams ready for any problems that arise. least everyone can try it and see how it goes , thats what i only meant to do and ended up still doing it. Suits me I am to lazy for bottles and my other half wouldnt fancy making up bottles either.

And if anyone thinks dads dont get bonding with baby because they cant feed them thats not true, my son loves his dad and is inseparable from him. They have a different bond but a great bond.

 

[JSinclair]

I tried to breast feed my LO and she wouldnt feed properly due to being mucousy,had many midwifes showing me how to latch her on etc and she would take one or 2 sucks and give up,I ended up expressing and feeding through a syringe,this unfortunetely wasnt enough for her so I ignored the midwife and my husband bought Aptamil and we fed both,she grew much more alert and after a week went solely onto the breast after clearing her sinuses and having a good amount of grub.I think you should do what feels right to you and as long as baby gains weight and looks well it doesnt matter.My brothers LO is bottle fed and is growing well despite having Cystic Fibrosis also.Breast is natural and if you want to and can I find it easier than sterilising,preparing etc but am also using a bottle now and again to get her used to it for when I leave her with OH or grandparents in a few weeks.

 

[venusrockstar]

Another reason I'd want to breastfeed is the cost. Breastfeeding is completely free and formula costs a fortune. My hubby and I will already have our hands full with the finances with me getting my normal pay basically cut in half while on mat leave and then we have a mortgage, bills, 2 cars, food etc to pay for. Any place I can save money, the better.

 

[lauralora]

i do believe breast is best, however i wont be doing it, i just dont feel comfortable enough with it unfortunatley xx

 

[winegums]

I really don't think it's fair to assume hospitals should be giving you formula for free! yeh they used to do it... they didn't realise just how great breast milk was and the majority of people started using formula. Now they know how much better it is which is why they are trying to cut down on using formula in hospitals. It is still available for women who for example have had a mastectomy... or have HIV or other diseases that can be transmitted. Only about 2% of women CANNOT breastfeed due to milk issues etc. Sure it may be hard, some people work at it months before they become 'good' or 'comfortable' with it.

For those that need support with breastfeeding (which is a hell of a lot of women because it is HARD) they need to see proper breastfeeding consultants or contact la leche league or something, not expect it from NHS midwives or health visitors who are not correctly trained in this area.

Hospitals are ALSO wanting to use less formula and promote breast feeding because it saves them money LONG TERM. now that they have studies proving that over the first 18 years or so children who were breastfed visit hospital quite a lot less etc they know that each extra person they persuade to breastfeed will help them cut down costs.

BTW i'm not like anti FF, i formula fed my baby and he's absolutely fine. I do think it's quite sad that he will never had that little extra boost to start life with (all the immunities and nutrients that are only in breast milk) but either way he is alive and kicking and that's what matters.

 

[ricschick]

its funny this thread is called 'Fed up of being told breast is best!'

 

[milkmachine]

its funny this thread is called 'Fed up of being told breast is best!'

i thought this too!!

 

[milkmachine]

i dont like these threads, they alwayyyysss go bad, i breastfed..hated it at first then did it for 16months and fully intend on doing it again. it always makes me a little sad when people decide not to breastfeed, i believe that human babies should have human milk. BUT you cant live other peoples lifes for them and your have to do whats right for you!

Op- im sorry you feel so pressured. perhaps youll change your mind when baby is here. as soon as my daughter was out i was like thats it i need to feed her.... weird urge!

 

[izzysmummy]

I totally agree with the last post, I didn't even hesitate after my daughter was born to Bf her, it was my first reaction. I felt great that only i could do this one thing for her. My husband was more than happy winding our daughter after her BF's and he loved nothing more than seeing her very content "i am full face".

I can't believe that some ladies have put on here that their babies prob didn't take to BF as their child was given a bottle whilst they were in recovery! I would and will totally hit the roof if my child was given a bottle of formula without my say so.

There is absolutely no reason why you should not be allowed immediate skin contact with your baby after having a c section. I will INSIST that if i have to have one that my baby is given straight to me immediately after the birth as this is the best way to calm baby and bring their HR to a normal rate, and baby remain with me or my husband until he is ready for a feed. You can BF laid down and in loads of other positions. Also babies don't need immediately feeding after the birth, they are more than happy just having cuddles with their mummy or daddy. My daughter had 4 feeds in 24 hours when she was born.

I never wanted to BF and never thought i would, but i tried it and loved it. I was the only mummy at our local blooming babies group that was BF'ing and i felt a bit pushed out and out of place. There isn't many people that feel comfortable BF and i completely understand that. How we feed our babies is our business and we should not feel wrong or made to feel inadequate for doing it our way.

xx

 

[milkmachine]

I totally agree with the last post, I didn't even hesitate after my daughter was born to Bf her, it was my first reaction. I felt great that only i could do this one thing for her. My husband was more than happy winding our daughter after her BF's and he loved nothing more than seeing her very content "i am full face".

I can't believe that some ladies have put on here that their babies prob didn't take to BF as their child was given a bottle whilst they were in recovery! I would and will totally hit the roof if my child was given a bottle of formula without my say so.

There is absolutely no reason why you should not be allowed immediate skin contact with your baby after having a c section. I will INSIST that if i have to have one that my baby is given straight to me immediately after the birth as this is the best way to calm baby and bring their HR to a normal rate, and baby remain with me or my husband until he is ready for a feed. You can BF laid down and in loads of other positions. Also babies don't need immediately feeding after the birth, they are more than happy just having cuddles with their mummy or daddy. My daughter had 4 feeds in 24 hours when she was born.

I never wanted to BF and never thought i would, but i tried it and loved it. I was the only mummy at our local blooming babies group that was BF'ing and i felt a bit pushed out and out of place. There isn't many people that feel comfortable BF and i completely understand that. How we feed our babies is our business and we should not feel wrong or made to feel inadequate for doing it our way.

xx

its a weird feeling isnt it! totally primal

 

[winegums]

hmm people in the NHS are now talking about more milk-banks so people dont have to resort to using formula! so for all the people that don't like breastfeeding there is still a good alternative! which i think is nice

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

If breastfeeding fails next time (Ihope it doesnt) I would most defianlty use a milk bank
xx

 

[Sayuri]

This will be my first child and I am planning if (all goes well)to Breastfeed, I have even bought those Tomee Tippee close to nature bottles so that if I am having trouble with the breastfeeding I will express or if my husband wants to help he can.

It is sad to hear that Midwives have not been supportive to those who have wanted to FF, but I will say that NOONE should make you feel bad about anything!

I do find it difficult to understand why some get upset when they are told that breast is best? I mean if you dont want to do it stand your ground and say "thanks but no thanks" at the end of the day its your life and your baby!

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

I do find it difficult to understand why some get upset when they are told that breast is best

As some ladies like my self wanted to BF more than anything and when things don't work you feel like a faliure (I did) and comments like 'Breast is best' doesn't help as we know that and it just makes us feel like we have failed our babies in some way
xx

 

[lizzieredrup]

I totally agree with the last post, I didn't even hesitate after my daughter was born to Bf her, it was my first reaction. I felt great that only i could do this one thing for her. My husband was more than happy winding our daughter after her BF's and he loved nothing more than seeing her very content "i am full face".

I can't believe that some ladies have put on here that their babies prob didn't take to BF as their child was given a bottle whilst they were in recovery! I would and will totally hit the roof if my child was given a bottle of formula without my say so.

There is absolutely no reason why you should not be allowed immediate skin contact with your baby after having a c section. I will INSIST that if i have to have one that my baby is given straight to me immediately after the birth as this is the best way to calm baby and bring their HR to a normal rate, and baby remain with me or my husband until he is ready for a feed. You can BF laid down and in loads of other positions. Also babies don't need immediately feeding after the birth, they are more than happy just having cuddles with their mummy or daddy. My daughter had 4 feeds in 24 hours when she was born.

I never wanted to BF and never thought i would, but i tried it and loved it. I was the only mummy at our local blooming babies group that was BF'ing and i felt a bit pushed out and out of place. There isn't many people that feel comfortable BF and i completely understand that. How we feed our babies is our business and we should not feel wrong or made to feel inadequate for doing it our way.

xx

I said this in my bit, but there was alot more to it, I was only 18 then and didn't have any support what so ever, I lost alot of blood after giving birth and the midwifes just took it upon themselves to feed him a bottle, to say the least I wasn't happy, they were terrible from the beginning as the whole reason my birth was so traumatic was that the midwife failed to see I had full bladder and let me push for 3 hours, then failed to notice I had teared inside! I went through so much the next 2 weeks after bringing him home, and ended up with mastitis and was very ill, that was when I gave up and felt a failure!

But i'd say that only made me more determined then the next time I was pregnant and im so so glad that I was and ended up fully breastfeeding until he weaned and went on the breastfeed my 3rd little man for 20 months I couldn't ever imagine not breastfeeding now, it just seems so natural to me! I did feel uneasy with this thread as I do feel for women who don't want to BF feeling like they are looked down upon but I also get a bit annoyed when people say things like BF makes it hard for dads to bond or I didn't have enough milk! I also have to agree that the title of this thread said it all really, they tell you breast is best because it is really!