Fireflies TCC a rainbow baby

[hope2bmother]

Bum. I got a positive opk tonight. DH went back to the uk for work on Sunday. So I'd DEFINATELY out this month 😞

Aw shucks! That's a bummer!

A personal question, were you able to get some BDing in on Sunday before he left? It's probably a very long shot, but I have heard that sperm can live for up to 7 days…

Maybe you and me will get out BFPs in our next cycle! Pretty sure DH and I missed ovulation this time around.

Good luck! Looking forward to keeping in touch with all of you!

 

[claudinator]

We DTD on Sunday. Ahhhhhh I'm so bummed. He's only home every two weeks for two days 😞 oh well.

 

[hope2bmother]

hope2bmother have you ever temped before or would it drive you crazy for some it works for others it causes stress you know I had dream I MC a day or two before spotting started I think deep down I knew, I also had a dream this week I was pregnant with twin girls, now I will just take one baby and I am not picky on a boy or girl. I hate not knowing were I am in my cycle mine were not even regular before getting pregnant this time so I hope they sort them selfs out supper quick! PS actually considering changing the name from Fireflies, as want everyone to feel welcome we all need support and some were to express our feelings

steph I hated that limbo land before MC happened! you know it will but waiting is so hard! will you wait it out or get a little help horrible you have to wait for test

mummy2o glad the bleeding has stopped really hoping mine does soon and let the TCC with lots of and as soon as possible

I am ok today, I have my appointment in the hospital tomorrow I just hope all is ok and nothing left behind
I started some supplements as well back on Vitamin B complex, Royal Jelly, Omega 3 and Q10 and my normal prenatal vitamins all to help a baby form and get some healthy eggs as well
feels like a lot though

Celtic,

I never asked, do you prefer to be called Niamh?

As for temping, I was recording my temp every morning prior to conceiving and then a few times during my pregnancy. I'm not sure how accurate it was b/c I am quite a restless sleeper and I usually get up in the very wee AM hours to pee! I do know my temp runs a little on the lower side… I've recently started temping again as I have a fertility app on my phone (Ovia), which I used last time to collect data and I really like it. Definitely gave me insight into my cycle.

Isn't it wild to think about how our subconscious is so in tune with what's going on in our bodies? It is both a blessing and a curse to have those sorts of dreams. I too had a dream the other night that I was pregnant again, but I think I was pregnant with a singleton. If you wind up with twin rainbow babies, that would be something else! But like you said, any rainbow baby will do! Boy! Girl! Singleton! Twins!

Hope your cycle regulates! Do you chart? I never thought my cycle was regular till I started charting! Granted, there's some variation btw cycles (one is 29 days and the next is 33 days). My luteal phase (LP), which I guess is important when it comes to risk of MC (short LP can = higher risk of MC), is btw 11 -14 days. Ideally LP is at least 12 days, from what I understand.

Oh, and regular is a misleading term! Many people think it means that your menses start on the same day every month when in all actuality being regular is getting a period every month. Do you get AF every month? How long are your cycles?

As for changing the name of the group, I personally don't think it's necessary, but maybe take a poll? I feel completely welcome here!

 

[sunshine2014]

I had a hot shower, got into pjs, got way too many chocolates to snack on and I'm watching terms of endearment.


Side note -- do you live in the states and your hubby goes to UK? That's so cool if so. But 2 days is super short for that long travel. I'm obsessed with the UK. So had to ask.

Also I'm a workout fanatic but taking time off for a few weeks. Can we chat and encourage each other when I'm back in the game? I love the motivation I'm not a runner but work out 5-6 days a week.

Ps is it awful that I'm feeling a little less broken by this whole thing now because I know the baby never had a hb. I know thsf makes me sound awful, and I'm still really sad. Bt it's helping me to know that the babe never really woke up in the first place.

Is it also bad that I want to eat brie, drink wine and eat sushi with salmon. Ugh. I'm a horrible person

 

[hope2bmother]

So I just want to say that I have been all over the map when it comes to emotions these last days. One minute I'm fine, then the next minute I'm not. My poor DH got back (to Ohio) from a comparative biology conference in Florida last night (welcome to the Arctic, honey!). And my attitude was probably colder than the weather outside! I was happy to see him, but I had just been on the good, old FaceBook only to see one of my friends adding to her already infinite posts/photos of her baby (her first): "Oh my baby this!" "Oh my baby that!" "My baby meeting so and so!" "My baby meeting another so and so!" "My baby meeting yet another so and so!" "My baby at this scenic overlook!" "My baby sleeping!" "My baby sleeping AGAIN!" "My baby feeding!" And on and on and on! Then I see another friend's husband posting about their baby that was just born a few days ago and bragging about how this baby sleeps, eats, poops, and that he has a big package just like his father! LIKE TMI!!!!!!!! Plus this post didn't help me to feel any less bitter! Ugh! So my DH comes home to me and I can only express my horrible attitude. I told my DH that I hate feeling so bitter towards these people, but that they are not considering that probably half of their FaceBook friends may have had miscarriages or struggled with fertility. I know for a fact that my friend posting all those photos has never struggled with an MC… Her pregnancy was an "accident". And while I am happy for her and her baby is adorable, there is a FINE LINE with going overboard. I know it's her page and she's free to do what she likes… I could unfollow her, but I still wish she wouldn't post a bloody photo every other minute of every day. I told my husband how I REALLY wanted to post something RIGHT NOW about miscarriage, but resisted. I will wait until October 15, 2015 to post something about National Infant and Pregnancy Loss Day.

The night ended with me sobbing how much I miss Little Bean. I HATE feeling so bitter and mean. It is so in conflict with my usual patient, loving, and compassionate self. I know I have no right to be so upset with a friend for posting what she wants to post on her FB page. It's her page after all. I think I will just unfollow her.

Rant over. I'm feeling better today. But my gosh! I think this must be PMS or something on top of the one month anniversary of Little Bean's passing coming up on the 13th! Yikes! AF better get here soon! Haha! I'm a hot mess!

 

[CelticNiamh]

We DTD on Sunday. Ahhhhhh I'm so bummed. He's only home every two weeks for two days 😞 oh well.

If you O tomorrow and all is right then may be you might not be out! I conceived my daughter that way and my others were 3 day BD before O and that got me boys

 

[wantingagirl]

I'm so ready to stop bleeding now! Fingers crossed we all get our rainbow babies soon. What a lovely group we can so do this!!! I'm having testings done too xx

 

[wantingagirl]

So I just want to say that I have been all over the map when it comes to emotions these last days. One minute I'm fine, then the next minute I'm not. My poor DH got back (to Ohio) from a comparative biology conference in Florida last night (welcome to the Arctic, honey!). And my attitude was probably colder than the weather outside! I was happy to see him, but I had just been on the good, old FaceBook only to see one of my friends adding to her already infinite posts/photos of her baby (her first): "Oh my baby this!" "Oh my baby that!" "My baby meeting so and so!" "My baby meeting another so and so!" "My baby meeting yet another so and so!" "My baby at this scenic overlook!" "My baby sleeping!" "My baby sleeping AGAIN!" "My baby feeding!" And on and on and on! Then I see another friend's husband posting about their baby that was just born a few days ago and bragging about how this baby sleeps, eats, poops, and that he has a big package just like his father! LIKE TMI!!!!!!!! Plus this post didn't help me to feel any less bitter! Ugh! So my DH comes home to me and I can only express my horrible attitude. I told my DH that I hate feeling so bitter towards these people, but that they are not considering that probably half of their FaceBook friends may have had miscarriages or struggled with fertility. I know for a fact that my friend posting all those photos has never struggled with an MC… Her pregnancy was an "accident". And while I am happy for her and her baby is adorable, there is a FINE LINE with going overboard. I know it's her page and she's free to do what she likes… I could unfollow her, but I still wish she wouldn't post a bloody photo every other minute of every day. I told my husband how I REALLY wanted to post something RIGHT NOW about miscarriage, but resisted. I will wait until October 15, 2015 to post something about National Infant and Pregnancy Loss Day.

The night ended with me sobbing how much I miss Little Bean. I HATE feeling so bitter and mean. It is so in conflict with my usual patient, loving, and compassionate self. I know I have no right to be so upset with a friend for posting what she wants to post on her FB page. It's her page after all. I think I will just unfollow her.

Rant over. I'm feeling better today. But my gosh! I think this must be PMS or something on top of the one month anniversary of Little Bean's passing coming up on the 13th! Yikes! AF better get here soon! Haha! I'm a hot mess!

Awh hunni they are so normal feelings if u feel better not seeing it just unfollow her.

I woke up this morning to a family member from my husband side announcing her pregnancy Jeesh good timing xx

 

[hope2bmother]

I had a hot shower, got into pjs, got way too many chocolates to snack on and I'm watching terms of endearment.


Side note -- do you live in the states and your hubby goes to UK? That's so cool if so. But 2 days is super short for that long travel. I'm obsessed with the UK. So had to ask.

Also I'm a workout fanatic but taking time off for a few weeks. Can we chat and encourage each other when I'm back in the game? I love the motivation I'm not a runner but work out 5-6 days a week.

Ps is it awful that I'm feeling a little less broken by this whole thing now because I know the baby never had a hb. I know thsf makes me sound awful, and I'm still really sad. Bt it's helping me to know that the babe
never really woke up in the first place.

Is it also bad that I want to eat brie, drink wine and eat sushi with salmon. Ugh. I'm a horrible person

Sunshine,

I would love to encourage each other when you get back in the game! No need to be a runner! I am like you and typically work out 5-6 days per week. Mostly running, but I also swim and train capoeira. I'm signed up for a marathon in early May, so I have to get going with the training, but could use some motivation and online workout buddies!

I don't think you're a horrible or awful person for feeling a little less broken b/c the baby never had a HB and never really woke up in the first place. Honestly, I never could really believe I was pregnant until I went for a scan at 8 weeks and there Little Bean was with a STRONG heartbeat of 147! After that, I felt SUPER ATTACHED and would kiss my ultrasound pic good night every night and make my DH do the same. Losing the baby after a heartbeat made it even harder! But I have been able to feel a little less broken b/c of my science background and realizing that even if my Little Bean had made it s/he would've had horrible genetic defects and suffered a lot in the world, so if s/he had to die, 9w2d, while still in utero was the absolute best time for it to happen. I am still quite sad, but it doesn't make me a horrible person. We are being realistic and doing what we can to help ourselves heal. We will ALWAYS remember our little ones and we will always love them, but we need to find ways to move forward.

As for the brie, salmon, and wine, I think you should do all this while lying in bed watching a movie. You should indulge while you can! You're going to be pregnant with that rainbow baby soon and have to give all that up again!

As for me, I think I'll just be lazy the rest of today. I'm going to make some veggie dumplings (recipe from my sister's Japanese roommate) and maybe watch some Netflix.

ENJOY YOUR EVENING, SUNSHINE!

 

[hope2bmother]

So I just want to say that I have been all over the map when it comes to emotions these last days. One minute I'm fine, then the next minute I'm not. My poor DH got back (to Ohio) from a comparative biology conference in Florida last night (welcome to the Arctic, honey!). And my attitude was probably colder than the weather outside! I was happy to see him, but I had just been on the good, old FaceBook only to see one of my friends adding to her already infinite posts/photos of her baby (her first): "Oh my baby this!" "Oh my baby that!" "My baby meeting so and so!" "My baby meeting another so and so!" "My baby meeting yet another so and so!" "My baby at this scenic overlook!" "My baby sleeping!" "My baby sleeping AGAIN!" "My baby feeding!" And on and on and on! Then I see another friend's husband posting about their baby that was just born a few days ago and bragging about how this baby sleeps, eats, poops, and that he has a big package just like his father! LIKE TMI!!!!!!!! Plus this post didn't help me to feel any less bitter! Ugh! So my DH comes home to me and I can only express my horrible attitude. I told my DH that I hate feeling so bitter towards these people, but that they are not considering that probably half of their FaceBook friends may have had miscarriages or struggled with fertility. I know for a fact that my friend posting all those photos has never struggled with an MC… Her pregnancy was an "accident". And while I am happy for her and her baby is adorable, there is a FINE LINE with going overboard. I know it's her page and she's free to do what she likes… I could unfollow her, but I still wish she wouldn't post a bloody photo every other minute of every day. I told my husband how I REALLY wanted to post something RIGHT NOW about miscarriage, but resisted. I will wait until October 15, 2015 to post something about National Infant and Pregnancy Loss Day.

The night ended with me sobbing how much I miss Little Bean. I HATE feeling so bitter and mean. It is so in conflict with my usual patient, loving, and compassionate self. I know I have no right to be so upset with a friend for posting what she wants to post on her FB page. It's her page after all. I think I will just unfollow her.

Rant over. I'm feeling better today. But my gosh! I think this must be PMS or something on top of the one month anniversary of Little Bean's passing coming up on the 13th! Yikes! AF better get here soon! Haha! I'm a hot mess!

Awh hunni they are so normal feelings if u feel better not seeing it just unfollow her.

I woke up this morning to a family member from my husband side announcing her pregnancy Jeesh good timing xx

Thank you, wantingagirl. I think I will unfollow her. I knew it would be somewhat painful seeing her baby, but the bigger part of me was happy for her and I wanted to see her baby. But it's gotten to be just way too much.

And ugh, what "awesome" timing re your family member on DH's side announcing her pregnancy! Sorry you had to wake up to that! I think I would've rolled over and gone back to sleep if it were possible.

I've decided that when I am pregnant, I'm not posting anything until the baby has been born. And then maybe one photo. As someone who has had a loss, I know there's too much that can go wrong. I am also very aware that many of my friends have also had losses of their own.

 

[hope2bmother]

I'm so ready to stop bleeding now! Fingers crossed we all get our rainbow babies soon. What a lovely group we can so do this!!! I'm having testings done too xx

Hope you get those answers, wantingagirl! Hope your bleeding stops soon. This is quite a lovely group and as I've said many times before, I look forward to taking this journey with all of you!

PS: Beautiful family, wantingagirl!

 

[neo13]

Hi,

May I join your thread? I'm not a firefly, my due date was 5/7/15 but sadly had a MMC which we found out about when I was 11 weeks. I had a D&C 2 weeks ago and am hoping for our rainbow baby soon. Its so hard I keep thinking how many weeks pregnant I would be now and everything. I already have a little girl and really wanted a sibling close in age for her.

I'm so sorry for everyones losses and really hope you get your rainbow babies soon.

xxx

 

[CelticNiamh]

hope2bmother have you ever temped before or would it drive you crazy for some it works for others it causes stress you know I had dream I MC a day or two before spotting started I think deep down I knew, I also had a dream this week I was pregnant with twin girls, now I will just take one baby and I am not picky on a boy or girl. I hate not knowing were I am in my cycle mine were not even regular before getting pregnant this time so I hope they sort them selfs out supper quick! PS actually considering changing the name from Fireflies, as want everyone to feel welcome we all need support and some were to express our feelings

steph I hated that limbo land before MC happened! you know it will but waiting is so hard! will you wait it out or get a little help horrible you have to wait for test

mummy2o glad the bleeding has stopped really hoping mine does soon and let the TCC with lots of and as soon as possible

I am ok today, I have my appointment in the hospital tomorrow I just hope all is ok and nothing left behind
I started some supplements as well back on Vitamin B complex, Royal Jelly, Omega 3 and Q10 and my normal prenatal vitamins all to help a baby form and get some healthy eggs as well
feels like a lot though

Celtic,

I never asked, do you prefer to be called Niamh?

As for temping, I was recording my temp every morning prior to conceiving and then a few times during my pregnancy. I'm not sure how accurate it was b/c I am quite a restless sleeper and I usually get up in the very wee AM hours to pee! I do know my temp runs a little on the lower side… I've recently started temping again as I have a fertility app on my phone (Ovia), which I used last time to collect data and I really like it. Definitely gave me insight into my cycle.

Isn't it wild to think about how our subconscious is so in tune with what's going on in our bodies? It is both a blessing and a curse to have those sorts of dreams. I too had a dream the other night that I was pregnant again, but I think I was pregnant with a singleton. If you wind up with twin rainbow babies, that would be something else! But like you said, any rainbow baby will do! Boy! Girl! Singleton! Twins!

Hope your cycle regulates! Do you chart? I never thought my cycle was regular till I started charting! Granted, there's some variation btw cycles (one is 29 days and the next is 33 days). My luteal phase (LP), which I guess is important when it comes to risk of MC (short LP can = higher risk of MC), is btw 11 -14 days. Ideally LP is at least 12 days, from what I understand.

Oh, and regular is a misleading term! Many people think it means that your menses start on the same day every month when in all actuality being regular is getting a period every month. Do you get AF every month? How long are your cycles?

As for changing the name of the group, I personally don't think it's necessary, but maybe take a poll? I feel completely welcome here!

Niamh is good Think I will leave the name may it be lucky for us

I have charted before was not really this time more watching CM and other signs I normally have a 28 to 30 day cycle and OV cd 14 to 17 and normally my LP would be 14 days but after I had my youngest my cycles were very long (normal for breastfeeding and returning cycles though) Plus the added huge amounts of stress in August and September after when I lost my mum, I have only had max 4 AF since he was born and 2 were 50 or more days long and then 2 at 31 days but I was OV late and LP was very short 6 days and was slowly creeping up to max 9 days that was my previous cycle before BFP , ( so I wonder if that was a factor in my MC) 9 days is on the short side

back on my Vitamin B complex which is meant to help that and I took Maca to help AF back and it worked so going to take that again to help sort out my cycles
I am hoping OV sorts it self out I had noticed it was very painful sometimes I needed pain relief and my boobs would be very sore around OV which were symptoms I never had before which I thought would not let me get pregnant till is sorted it self out so I was delighted when I got my BFP

I am back charting with fertility friend and got some OPK to try I have never used them before should be fun or annoying might start temping again guess it would be good to know in case I got a BFP for dating.

I am not surprised your emotions are running high it is a roller-coaster and hormones have a huge part to play dam things! I would block your friends news feed showing up that way you can still be friends, I also wanted to say something on my news feed about MC but think I will wait on till October and hopefully some will have or be due at that point to help ease the pain
no one knew I was pregnant only my 2 sisters and my best friend doubt I will tell others either

 

[CelticNiamh]

I'm so ready to stop bleeding now! Fingers crossed we all get our rainbow babies soon. What a lovely group we can so do this!!! I'm having testings done too xx

Hi Wanting good to see you, hope your doing ok considering I am so ready for that to be over with as well, when will they start testing

Hi,

May I join your thread? I'm not a firefly, my due date was 5/7/15 but sadly had a MMC which we found out about when I was 11 weeks. I had a D&C 2 weeks ago and am hoping for our rainbow baby soon. Its so hard I keep thinking how many weeks pregnant I would be now and everything. I already have a little girl and really wanted a sibling close in age for her.

I'm so sorry for everyones losses and really hope you get your rainbow babies soon.

xxx

Hi Neo I hope you get your rainbow baby quickly

 

[ajarvis]

yea. Going to do a lighter workout tonight. But I was off for like 2 weeks without running at all! That's alot lol.

Hahaha! I know what you mean! When I was pregnant I was diagnosed with a subchorionic hematoma and told pelvic rest, which meant no aerobic activity… And I'm a marathoner! It was hard, but I did what I had to for my Little Bean.

I was gonna get out there and run today with a running group, but it's absolutely treacherous out there today: 9 degrees F (~ -13 C) and it's windy, so it feels more like -8 F (~ -22 C)! I think I'll stick to the elliptical, though I hate working out indoors!

Happy running/working out!

Ouch lol. I feel your pain! I think I'll just do a lower body workout tonight. I have an LSD on Sunday of 18KM so I need to make that. Last run I did was Dec 22nd for 16. Have a half marathon coming up in Feb. Last night I went slow but it was a hill run and we have about 2-3 inches of snow on the ground and it was just above 0 so it was warm and soft. My legs are just dead from it. It was definitely the snow that kicked my but. Was only 10.5 km but wow. Almost want a rest day ha.

I edited my post to include my thoughts on MC and exercise! Sorry I just saw your post about running and got excited! Lol!

What is an LSD? You sound pretty hard core, like me! :thumb up: Good luck with the 18KM! I have a love/hate relationship with hills, but now that I am living in a state that's flatter than a pancake (Ohio), I miss hill running (I was in Boston for grad school and hills are EVERYWHERE)!

Do you have a time goal for your half marathon?

Haha! I understand about a run kicking your butt! My first day back running, I met up with the running group I mentioned earlier and went out for about a 10 km fartlek. Well, I was SOOO HAPPY to be out running, I ran like a bat out of hell for the first 5 km, keeping up with the front group of guys. Then they were like, "Okay, now sprint for 1 minute!" And I was like, "I am ALREADY SPRINTING!" It wasn't pretty. My legs were like logs after that, but I made it to the end. The next day I felt worse than after my marathons and I was like Took one day off and then made the mistake of going to train capoeira for the first time in months and that was like double the next day! I could barely move!

I went back and read it! That's how I felt on Monday when it seemed to help move things along. As far as I can tell it's causing no actual problems. Cervix still open so that explains the blood. Will leave a message for midwife tomorrow see what her thoughts are! No goal time for the half. It's the hypo half. So no telling what the weather here in Feb will be. In the last 4 years it's been anything from -30 to +10 (Celsius) so it's kinda just a race to run for fun and the brunch after is apparently awesome lol. This is my first time.

 

[sunshine2014]

Terms of endearment is a horrible movie. Ugh. That was a bad choice for this sad day. Oh well.

Niamh what does maca do? And vitamin b?

 

[CelticNiamh]

Terms of endearment is a horrible movie. Ugh. That was a bad choice for this sad day. Oh well.

Niamh what does maca do? And vitamin b?

Here some great information on, in short Maca is a vegetable from the turnip family eaten by the Indians in Peru which were living high up in the Andes they used it for fertility for 100 of years with great success, Maca works by nourishing the pituitary gland ( which is the master gland) in the brain which in turns balances out our hormones it is great at increasing your energy and Libido as well
more details can be found here :https://natural-fertility-info.com/maca andhttp://www.themacateam.com/maca-for-fertility

B complex : I was taking B complex to help balance hormones and because my LP was short Vitamin B6 is good for that. I found this information on line :The B vitamins play a key role in reproductive health and also in early fetal development; folic acid, especially, can prevent certain birth defects. Experts recommend that women trying to conceive take a vitamin B complex supplement that contains vitamin B12, biotin, folic acid, and all other B vitamins, plus extra vitamin B6.'

This information is very good https://www.conceiveeasy.com/get-pregnant/fertility-vitamins/

Royal jelly is good as well https://natural-fertility-info.com/royal-jelly.html

 

[CelticNiamh]

I just changed the first post a little so anyone that needs support knows they are welcome here you do not need to be a fireflie

 

[ajarvis]

I'm so ready to stop bleeding now! Fingers crossed we all get our rainbow babies soon. What a lovely group we can so do this!!! I'm having testings done too xx

I am so with you! Impatiently waiting. Been bleeding since Dec 21st. Grrr.

 

[sunshine2014]

Thanks! I'll definitely read up on it.