first cycle actively trying (June 2015)

[lesondemavie]

We ended up watching The Cabin. I'm a sucker for bad horror. I did get the price down. I declined the diagnostics and just asked to do an antibiotic trial. Took the price down to just $130...but I think they forgot to charge me for the blood panel that they already did. I'll call them back and pay for it on Monday. My girl seems better already, but she's the worst at taking medicine. The other girls we can sneak it into their food. My cat stops eating, and if you dissolve it and shoot it in her mouth she just drools it all out. Seems like she's getting enough despite her best efforts. She hasn't cried for me by her litter box at all today.

Already some good news this weekend. Our back up buyers were still interested and they came up to the price we wanted. It's not as much as the other offer, but still a great price, their stronger buyers, and they'll probably let us rent back the place until we buy a new house ourselves.

I'm having so many mixed feelings with my fertile window starting tomorrow. I suppose that's to be expected.

 

[Jezika]

Gina, it's only from seeing other people's comments just now that I realize I missed yours. I feel so bad and I really, truly feel for you. I hope you found someone to talk to and that you didn't have to wait too long for DH to come home. I also hope you feel better in the morning. TTC is quite the emotional journey

 

[Jezika]

Les - glad to hear kitty seems to be feeling a bit better. So you have two girls? I have two boys And definitely good news on the condo... FX it goes through okay. And I'm sure it's normal to have mixed feelings about the fertile window. I feel like it's such a foreign land handling all these emotions when we have nothing else in life to compare it to or to prepare for it with, and it's such an odd thing to be going through these cycles repeatedly, like monthly rollercoasters. I feel pretty easily scarred by things and can get quite avoidant when reminders come up, so to go through cycles and be reminded of previous cycles in a bad way is pretty aversive. Even though I know it will be fine in the end, sometimes that's hard to believe. But it will be fine in the end, for all of us, I know it. I really do.

Vel - Yes, it does seem like I O'd but it's weird how the OPKs don't reflect that at all. I just tried putting in another rising temp for Sunday to see if it would give me CH, which it did (and dashed line one because of -ve OPKs I imagine). So as long as my temp doesn't go down tomorrow, I'll get CH.

 

[kiki1234]

So an odd couple of days for me... I have felt like I am going to get AF for the past 2 days. Cramps off/on. Not severe - but definitely there. My last 2 cycles AF came at 26-27 days so that would put me at Tuesday-ish. I was hoping that since I think I ovulated late (Day-18), then I would be back to my normal cycle of 31. SO frustrating. The weirdest part tho is that I have absolutely NO breast pain. I do not remember the last period that I had that I did not have incredibly sore breasts. Normally it happens 1-1 1/2 weeks prior to AF. So I am just confused! We shall see. My cycle use to be so predictable and now I feel like I have no idea!... I have no idea how long a normal luteal phase is for me - so I was hoping AF waited til closer to 30 days - so it would be longer. I have never fully understood this & honestly didn't know much about it until I started reading this blog. Basically if my period comes on Tuesday that would put me at a luteal phase of 9 days - and my understanding is that is pretty short right? Grrr... Just a frustrating couple of days. So I think we've all been in the same bucket! Hope this week starts off better!

 

[Jezika]

Kiki - hmmm, it sounds like you started getting cramping at 6-7 DPO. Not to get your hopes up, but it could be implantation cramping. I got that from 9DPO last cycle and started getting BFPs from 12DPO. I remember you saying you did BD around ovulation time, so it's definitely possible? And I don't **think** your LP length should change so wildly from month to month, so if you ovulated later, chances are AF is due later too (but all this depends on your knowing when you ovulated last month of course).

 

[lesondemavie]

Jez - We actually have 3 girls! We plan also on getting a corgi after we sell the condo and buy a place with a yard. Looking at a house back in the canyon today. I'm really excited about it, but afraid they're going to ask for too much.

Kiki - You just never know! Please don't worry too much about the LP. I had an 8 day one once and was in tears thinking that meant I'd never get pregnant. It went right back up to 10 after that and I was more regular than I had been before. My BFP followed just a few months later.

 

[Jezika]

Ah, three little ladies - how lovely. Apart from foster cats, I've only had male cats. Not a conscious preference, but I'm so used to it. Very cool re: corgis! Do your cats like dogs? I think one of mine would be fine but I have no idea about the other one; he's pretty sketch.

AFM, so I finally got an almost-positive OPK. Actually, two, with three impatient hours in-between. I feel like the second one is slightly lighter. I hope I didn't gear up to O and then failed to. Then again, I had doubts about my positive OPK last cycle too and only managed to get one that looked like it was 98% positive. We BD'd last night because the UTI pain had subsided. I feel some burning again today. I know it wasn't a good idea but I hate the thought of not BDing in my fertile window and then having to wait another month. Plus I get UTIs all the damn time because of sex so if I let that stop us, we might as well start looking into adoption.

 

[Jezika]

Oh, Les, keep us posted about the canyon house! FX it's at a doable price.

 

[lesondemavie]

Jez - We always had female pets growing up, so same - what I'm used to. Love that we don't have to worry about spraying. Our girls have been pretty welcoming to other cats. We figure if we get the puppy when it's small enough, they can put it in its place at the bottom of the hierarchy. Also why we're sticking with something small. I'd love an Irish wolfhound, but those are huge. Bit worried about the corgi since it has herding tendencies. I've read that they like everyone to be in the same room and they'll nip at toddlers' heels. I'm confident in my training skills though, so it might take work but I think it'll be fine. Hoping they end up being besties that nap together. Yay for the +opk. As for the UTIs - Do you clean off after? I used to get UTIs after sex all of the time. Haven't had a single one since I started rinsing off immediately after. For TTC, I now just stay horizontal 5-10 minutes after and then clean off. I think some of us are just more prone to them than others, and they're no fun at all. I had a friend who just took cranberry pills on a regular basis to try and prevent them. Fx to you this cycle!

AFM: DH has been bugging me to bd all day since he knows it's the start of my fertile window. He keeps taking everything I say as foreplay! It's cracking me up. Enough so that I might just hold out until later tonight.

 

[Jezika]

That's funny, Les. I've been exactly like that with DH and he's been the slightly resistant one. As of the beginning of my last cycle, I do wash before and after every time we BD (and I make him shower before too) and pee after. Like you, I usually leave a bit of time lying horizontal before I pee and wash. When we BD'd two days ago, however, I thought it would be fine not to wash afterwards and I only peed after an hour. Maybe that's what did it, and then maybe the BDing last night exacerbated it all, even though I followed the full washing/peeing protocol. Or maybe I don't pee/wash soon enough after? In any case, right now I am in COMPLETE agony - can't get off the toilet and am peeing tiny bits of bloody tissue. I had to cancel a dinner thing last minute so DH has gone on his own with our BFFs, which is double suckie. I'm drinking TONNES of water but still not getting relief. There is no way I can BD again in the next few days as there are so many commitments I can't cancel if BDing makes it worse. So now I'm stressed out about not BDing optimally for O. I feel like I can't win... agony and TTC or no agony but no TTC.

 

[lesondemavie]

Aw I'm so sorry it's that bad! I usually do the whole routine immediately after. DH always wants to cuddle, but never gets to bc I'm up and straight to the bathroom. A uti is just not worth it. I was worried waiting a bit for TTC. I only did for one cycle - our BFP cycle. It was fine though, and I'll do it again this time...but definitely not waiting longer than 5-10 minutes to pee/rinse off. I know that agony, and definitely don't want to end up back in that pain again.

 

[gina236]

Hi ladies. Can't weigh in on the uti talk, never had one thankfully.

DH and I have been dtd quite a bit this weekend. He rode his new dirtbike Saturday and got a little whiplash. So I knew he would be hurting soon do I made sure we dtd Saturday night, actually between taking our Sheppard pie out of the oven and eating it then I was really horny all night still so we ended up doing it twice Sunday morning before getting out of bed (but he didn't finish either time that morning) I have been insatiable lately so I figured I'd be O'ing soon, had some ewcm this morning so either already did or am about to. Don't have any idea what CD I'm on but hopefully DHs neck feels a little better so we can tonight. It's also his last week at his second job! Can't wait for him to be done! overall pretty good news from me which is surprising because I've been in a crappy mood all morning. Feeling run down, just want more sleep. But hopefully not stressing about ttc will help us actually conceive lol. Hope everyone else had a good weekend!

 

[wifeybby]

Hi loves I'm a few pages behind already lol I love how active this thread is.

By the end of last week, DH and I made up. Lots and lots of makeup BD this weekend I love when we get that reconnection after life sucks for a bit. Thank you all for the it was very much needed. Luckily, no more side effects and feeling like myself again.


Gina -- I hope you're feeling better. I hate those nights. I'd come over and hang out, cry and laugh with you all night.

Les, hope your furbaby is feeling better. UTI's suck, can't imagine how bad for a poor little kitty who doesn't understand it. That's so sad. I hope the ATBs work and thats all it was. I've only had one UTI myself, and it really sucked. I typically have DH grab me a hot washcloth and wipe off while I'm still laying down (I try to lay down for like 20 minutes, legs up a bit to keep semen in) and then once some time has passed I get up and wash off properly. I haven't had a UTI in probably ten years, no idea what caused the one I had.

Oh TTC is such a rollercoaster - Was getting all down and out about stuff this morning - DH's car broke down on his way to work, the drama from last week, not sure what's going to happen in terms of buying our house -- it was all weighing me down. All of this overthinking in the bathroom of course, lol -- but when I got up, realized I was spotting!! Couldn't believe it as my last dose of Provera was only Saturday (I missed a dose, not sure when, lol, but also it took me like 4-5 days to bleed last time on it) so of course that cheered me up. If all goes as planned, I just might O in time to get a Christmas baby I'd be happy to have a baby any day, but still have my hopes up for December. If today is full flow CD1, I'll start Clomid Weds, then would O the 25th or so ish. Pray for me please! Fingers crossed! Good vibes! Baby dust me! Whatever you believe, throw some of it my way!

Hope everyone has a great week, much better than last week

 

[gina236]

Wifey yay for spotting!! That sounds so weird to say but I get it I do wish we all lived closer together so we could be there in times of need but at least we have this forum. You ladies are great! I hope you O on time wifey and get that Christmas baby! You so deserve it!

 

[wifeybby]

Thank you so much, Gina! I totally wish we all lived closer, could meet up for a girls day. Maybe someday we can meet up with our babies for a BnB reunion, haha how cute would that be!

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Good morning everyone! Got home around 11pm from my ladies weekend and dh met me a the door with lots of kisses. Of course since my AF ended Saturday while I was gone, we didn't wait to make up for lost time and bd last night...i think he really likes that my libido has gone way up since removing the iud

 

[gina236]

Wifey that would be soo amazing!! A little play date with all our bnb girls! where in the US are you? I don't remember lol.

Gag that's good that your libido has gone up since taking out the iud. Guys usually don't mind more haha. That's half the battle of ttc right there. Lol.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Wifey that would be soo amazing!! A little play date with all our bnb girls! where in the US are you? I don't remember lol.

Gag that's good that your libido has gone up since taking out the iud. Guys usually don't mind more haha. That's half the battle of ttc right there. Lol.

Isn't that the truth lol. I have noticed a couple of side effects that have stuck around still even after removing the IUD. My ankles swelled up a bit after the 7 hour car ride and from sitting a lot during the weekend. I also had some intense anxiety on Saturday with heart palpitations and just general not feeling awesome, but I will get through this, I'm determined to do it without medication. I can say even though I'm tired because we lost an hour and I got in late, I feel better since having it removed.

 

[gina236]

That's good. Hopefully those side effects will ease as your body realizes it's not there anymore. I have issues with anxiety so I hear you there. It really sucks. My dh doesn't get anxiety at all so he always feels so helpless because he just doesn't understand how I'm feeling. He actually enables my anxiety which isn't good but we didn't realize until a few months ago that he does it. I hate leaving the house alone to do anything. Before we got back together I used to force myself to go out to my favorite forest and go do homework out in the woods (weird I know but it was so peaceful) my anxiety was getting so much better and I was able to go to the store etc alone. Now that dh and I share a vehicle I just have him go everywhere for me or with me. I never go out alone (we even work at the same place so we drive in and home together). He does it willingly because he doesnt like to see me upset but it actually makes when I try to do something alone even harder. So I need to work on pushing myself and not leaning on him so much. Not sure how I ended up in that train of thought but enjoy the insight into my crazy mind haha.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

That's good. Hopefully those side effects will ease as your body realizes it's not there anymore. I have issues with anxiety so I hear you there. It really sucks. My dh doesn't get anxiety at all so he always feels so helpless because he just doesn't understand how I'm feeling. He actually enables my anxiety which isn't good but we didn't realize until a few months ago that he does it. I hate leaving the house alone to do anything. Before we got back together I used to force myself to go out to my favorite forest and go do homework out in the woods (weird I know but it was so peaceful) my anxiety was getting so much better and I was able to go to the store etc alone. Now that dh and I share a vehicle I just have him go everywhere for me or with me. I never go out alone (we even work at the same place so we drive in and home together). He does it willingly because he doesnt like to see me upset but it actually makes when I try to do something alone even harder. So I need to work on pushing myself and not leaning on him so much. Not sure how I ended up in that train of thought but enjoy the insight into my crazy mind haha.

Gina that's the hard part of anxiety. It's irrational and it's grows on itself. I've been using breathing, cognitive therapy, and self talk to really help with my anxiety and now it actually makes me mad when out creeps up. I just want to feel like me again and not always worry about every pain and every twinge and every stupid thing, feeling like I'm going to die.. I'm telling messing it's going to stop now.