General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[Flueky88]

CB I had stomach virus at 8 weeks with V. Starting puking bad on a Friday and i didn't go away until Sunday. Worst was Friday but it did linger some. V is 1 and healthy so I wouldn't worry unless you got dehydrated to where you need to get IV fluids.

Kitty yeah a 4 year gap never appealed to me except maybe between 2 and 3. I worry about my fertility so I don't want to wait. Thankfully DH also wants a small gap.

Shae it looked yummy the shepherd's pie that is.

Jez I think you are so right about emotional vs sexual with men vs women. I was really bad witj DH though.... 2nd date. After the first date I knew he was "the one". It was a strange feeling. Even now, when I get aggravated at him I still can't imagine being without him. He's truly a good man, but a bit senstive about things. I've had to deal with a lot of hard things in my life and it can frustrate me when he's "being a baby" about something so small in the scheme of things. Other than that he's a great husband and father. We all have our flaws. I'm by no means perfect.

Anyways, I do hope you two can work through the lack of intimacy.

Gigs, yay NIN!!! My brother got me hooked on them. Oh and I've been meaning to ask, do you have a feeling on gender? Going to do any of the old wives tales??

My sex drive kicked n like a week before I had V. I didn't want sex during 1st or 2nd tri. I did my wifely duties though i hope DH gets luckier next time for his sake. He was soooo dissapointed I didn'tget super horny 2nd tri symptom.

Bdb that's great that you all get along and care for the others kids. That doesn't often hapoen snd i unfortunate for the kids.

Can't remember much else.

I was thinking how during O week in August 2016 I was at disney. Obviously out i the sun a binch and getting vit d from it. I conceived V the next cycle. It may be coincedence but I'm going to remain hopeful that once this is corrected ttc will be short. Cd 4 here so pretty boring.

Anyone got a gift for their DHs for father's day? I just received black panther blu ray and new otterbox for DHs phone.

 

[Cppeace]

Well light does indeed play a roll in fertility. In fact, there is some thing with light and ovulation period. I remember it as something like, sleep in pitch black coming up to fertile period then sleep with light on for 3 fertile days in which you should ovulate. This is supposed to help with stronger ovulation or something. Vitamin d is very important to fertility though.

As for me, I got a few bargains at an auction Sunday. A full stoneware dish set for $7.50. At least a $150 set in like new condition.
An Amazon fire hd8 tablet in like new condition for $30.
And accidentally an antique cast iron safe which we will have to rent a truck and appliance dolly to get it home lol for $12.50
It's a local auction which just started doing online bidding to go along with the floor bidders on some of their auctions. Will be checking it out too often, I'm sure.

 

[shaescott]

Jez the whole sex vs emotion thing definitely makes sense.

When SO first met me his first thought was “I’d tap that” cuz men are like that lol, he would’ve jumped me from the start had he not been so nervous (plus he was a virgin so that added to the nervous part). Instead he was respectful and didn’t initiate anything at all, knowing I was also a virgin and it was both our first relationship and knowing I was also nervous and it was new etc. and of course his nervousness played a part. He then formed that emotional bond with me, but his initial thoughts were sexual. When I first met him I thought he was cute and was interested in a potential relationship, sex never crossed my mind. But after dating for a month, considering I was a teenager, my hormones went crazy and were basically screaming “jump him”. If I hadn’t been spending time with him that wouldn’t have happened, I definitely needed the emotional bond before the sex drive kicked in. Anyway, when that happened I initiated sexual contact, which he was not at all opposed to but never would have asked for. At that point we were only going to 2nd base. About a month later he asked about 3rd base, which took some convincing because I thought penises were gross and didn’t want them in my mouth lol but eventually I agreed and found it to be not nearly as gross as I expected, not really gross at all actually . And a month after that we had sex. We were going to wait longer because I wanted to wait (he wanted to jump me from the start) but my hormones were going crazy and so I was like “okay yeah this is happening”, and we DTD lol.

Anyway that was a long winded anecdotal way of confirming the men vs women and sex vs emotion thing.

 

[gigglebox]

Fluek hell yeah NIN! *high five* the more I get to know about you the more I like you

No gender feels here whatsoever. I'm still just trying to "feel" pregnant in the first place and I still feel like a waffle, going to and fro between terrifear and absolutely elated. But mostly I am almost in this weird state of denial...? I just simply don't feel pregnant. I talk about it to hubs and almost feel like I'm lying, or like the words aren't real...ugh really hard to describe. I perpetually feel the same as I do in the first part of the tww before a test can confirm it and you're just sitting there feeling content, like you've done all you can and now you wait. Maybe it's because no scan and lack of symptoms make me feel like i'm still waiting for confirmation. Basically it just hasn't sunk in yet so I think I need to get to that point before I have gender feels...which I don't believe for myself anyway because I was so unbelievably incorrect last time!

Cpp sweet deals! I'm a sucker for online auctions so that sounds like trouble for me. There's an auction house down the road but i'm too aftaid i'd bid myself out of home. I have a horrible gamblers personality. Online is even worse because not physically seeing money makes spending it so much easier! That said i love a good bargain. Just got a $85 trade in value of the wedding band that came in a set i just bought after i paid $70 for the set i got a ring to go with the solitaire that i'm in love with.

Jewelry is my new thing, i love it but also trying to make money. I know what to look for and buy it cheap and yard sales then resell on ebay. Latest was a pin i bought for $24, sold for $51 i think? I probably could have made more of i listed it instead of auction but meh. Not bad for an item i had for a week.

 

[gigglebox]

Wow my bad, that was a long rant

 

[shaescott]

AF seems to be starting, so I guess I ovulated a couple days earlier than I thought I did and just still had some EWCM for 2-3 days post-O. This shit is why I can’t wait to go on the pill for the damn regularity.

 

[pacificlove]

Jez, I am sure you'll figure it out. Like you I need emotional closeness before sexual stuff happens, so having L between us didn't help my feelings of separation from dh. Even after L left our bed, it took me months to adjust sleeping next to my dh again let alone cuddle at night.
It was part of having a healthy relationship to have L sleep in his own room and bed. L will leave the nest in 18 years, dh won't, so I try to remember to put him first too. Even if it is a rare backrub or a wrestle that may turn naughty. Hahahaha

 

[kittykat7210]

How do I bring up an earlier second child to hubby in a way that sounds inviting?

 

[claireybell]

First 4yrs of me & SO being together we were highly active, i always remember him telling me he had a high sex drive, i hadnt been with that many before him & it scared me abit lol but once i got in the rhythm of lotsa jiggy i was well away haha my tummy used to flutter alot back then, i am feeling rather horny atm so he loves that haha!

Kit you coukd always raise the subject that if theres a 4yr+ age gap, they wont want to play together much as kids as they’ll be into too many diff things.. & if you pop them out closer together, you’ll be younger parents when they get abit older & you can have fun filled holidays at water parks & stuff lije that, il be a luch older mum, so this babe will be my last, il be 41/42 when he/she starts school

 

[claireybell]

My cousins wife had a mmc at 9/10 wks but a week before that she had an awful stomach virus , poss food poisoning even & she swears it was what caused her mmc, just made me worry, Adams gone to work today & Rileys doing better, his annoying cheeky self & irritating his sister Lol!

She just passed out slumped sat up resting her chin on my shoulder haha
https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=1035523&stc=1&d=1528282187

 

[gigglebox]

Part of why we started having kids early was we wanted to still be young and active when they were old enough to watch themselves so we can still go out and have fun later. We had our first when i was 25 and tbh i regret the huge age gap between him and the next kids. It's easier in the fact that ds1 can take care of himself a good bit, but he was so used to being the only kid he is extremely possesive of his stuff. Hopefully they play more when lev is older but probably not as much as lev and this next baby will play.

As far as just making it sound inviting...just talk about how fun baby-making sex is, no barriers, no pull out...

Also keep in mind you may want to try a little earlier anyway since conception may take some time.

 

[PurplePear]

We decided to start trying with the next as ds is 10months old because of that gigs. I've read the older we get the harder it is to conceive and higher risk of Mc. I'm 36 and want to be able to do a lot with them plus keep it a smaller age gap.

 

[Flueky88]

Cppeace, yes I really think it is why I had trouble conceiving. Also, it's linked with pre term labor and BV! I had BV diagnosed day before I went into labor. I thought it may have been from my increased drive that week, but now I don't think so.

Oh those are amazing deals!!! Now I want to buy stuff for a bargain!!

Shae glad AF finally showed so you know it's not pregancy. Also, the pill had me quite regular with bleeding. It's withdrawal bleeding since it prevents O. Why do you not think it will work for you? Also, to be honest I'm not a fan of hormonal birth control any more. It totally messed with my hormones and cycles coming off of it.

Gigs, too bad we don't live a little closer. I think I live the closet to you though. We would definitely be friends I think. I agree with you on smaller age gaps and not wanting to be too old to enjoy things once kids are older. DH is feeling it more though as he's turning 33 this year. I think thats a big reason he's unsure of ttc #3.

My initial gut with V was girl but I ad a dream I had a boy around 9 to 10 weeks. I changed my mind because of that stupid dream. This pregnancy seems so different, I'll guess team pink just cause

Kitty, I'd also mention the older you are the more likely of difficulty conceiving, higher risk of mc, high risk pregnancy, etc. Also, you dont want to be able to enjoy time when kids are grown.

I think it would be harder too to go from essentially "independent" child then going through it all again. I'm not sure if that makes sense.

CB I'm sorry about your friend. It may or may not be due to GI bug. Anywhoo, that is such a cute picture of Nuala. Hard to believe she'll be 2 in a couple months.

Glad Riley and SO are feeling better.

AFM AF has nearly left the building. Getting excited about ttc officially. We were supposed to start originally at this time. I feel like when my vit D level is corrected ttc should come easier. Oh and my 50 opks came in yesterday. Woohoo.

DHs mom has a biopsy on her throat Friday. Kind of worried, but "what will be, will be".

 

[kittykat7210]

Thanks for all the advice, unfortunately the age thing won’t work as we are 23 and 24! I’ll try and work up a good arguement about the age gap meaning hey might not play together!

 

[claireybell]

Pop another out now Kit lol then when yourkiddies are like 14/15 you guys will be mid-late 30’s perfect for Holiday’ing with kids & they can come/go as they please

Is BV linked with lack of Vit D then? I suffer awful with it, currently dont have it as i dont need lube atm lol but i always get it bad, drives me nuts!

Yay for official ttc Flueks hehee & 50opjs haha i bet you’ll only need them this cycle now

 

[claireybell]

Sat in garden in enjoying the Sun & omg its frikkin boiling ahhhhh i want some tan but its killing me in the process ha ha

 

[claireybell]

Kit Google reasons to have children close in age hehe there be some good ideas there i bet

 

[nyxnw]

We had our first when I was 23 and he was 25. Our DS is a little over a year and we are ttc right now. I think everyone around us made it easier for my hubby hecause they all said it was easier if you didn’t have a huge age gap. So get your friends involved lol.

 

[kittykat7210]

Good plan!! I’ll get my mum involved too, she loves babies!

 

[bdb84]

I like the larger age gaps in my children, but I do wish they were closer only because there's such a gap from when my oldest will be out of the house and then my youngest. I had very much intended, and worked hard, to be done child rearing by the time I was 30. I had DD2 just three months after my 30th birthday, but because of my marriage falling apart, the last thing on my mind was permanent birth control. I am glad that the fates aligned the way they did, though.