General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[shaescott]

Kitty I think you look pregnant, the rest of you is on the smaller side so it looks more likely to be a baby bump. Just my 2 cents, though.

 

[pacificlove]

Gigs sorry about your father. Our hearts go out to you!

Fern, sorry about the roller coaster. Very hard thing to go through, vent to us if you need to!

Shae: well, my province says "hold my coffee, here is all 4 seasons crammed into a week".
Seriously we've had snowstorm, windstorm, rain and sunshine. Took 3 days and the snow is mostly gone already when we had well over a foot. Cancelled ferries, black ice to beautiful sunshine.

Dh has been great as he's been very supportive of me getting some alone time. So Sundays I have been "escaping" to a horse barn. Been volunteering my time to clean the barn and then we usually do a 1+ hour trail ride. The barn owner invited me to a snow ride during the snowfall. it was a weekday but there was so much snow that he was doubtful that the city would be plowed, dh called it a snow day and stayed home to watch the kids. Meanwhile I had a 3 hour ride in the snowstorm. It was magical!
We were glad we went that day, because by the next day it was already turning treacherous for a horse

 

[shaescott]

Thread’s been quiet lately, hope everyone is doing well!

Gigs I hope you’ve been coping okay and focusing on self care and family etc

AFM went clubbing for the first time with SO and his friends on Friday and as we’re arriving his friends tell us it’s a gay club considering we’re not gay it was an interesting experience but it was very fun, we had a great time.
On another note, SO has been talking a lot about how he wants to have kids soon and the only thing holding him back is finances (we don’t live together yet, we’re both still in school, etc) so basically he’s agreed that once we’re married and are financially stable he’s down to TTC. Which is awesome because previously he was saying 2025-2026. Since I’m graduating in 2021 and we’re planning on getting married in 2022, that puts us much earlier for TTC (thank god lol)

 

[Jezika]

Haven't properly caught up and super busy atm but Gigs I want to say I'm so sorry for your loss. These are some of the hardest parts of life, and I imagine especially hard when there are little ones around... though in a way that is maybe also therapeutic

Pacific that sounds magical. Glad you get to get out like that. I would love to do that kind of stuff.

Shae you've not been to a nightclub before? I haven't been in about 10 years to be fair. Was never massively keen. I've always liked gay clubs thought - everyone seems to be way nicer and I never had to worry about sleazy men being inappropriate or annoying.

I'm becoming a bio aunt tomorrow. My SIL is having a baby (elective c-section, which I didn't realized they allowed on the NHS, so that's cool). Can't wait to find out the name. It's a boy and they've been so secretive. Oh, I also ordered them a bouncer from PreciousLittleOne.com (it's a UK site - do you know it CB if you're reading this????) and I haven't been able to log in to track the parcel and the company is totally unresponsive on email and now I'm seeing a tonne of complaints from customers on their insta and Facebook for having terrible customer service, not delivering things, not refunding things etc., so I'm worried.

 

[shaescott]

Jez I hadn’t been before, I didn’t notice any sleazy men so that worked out! I hope your nephew will be born soon! Sorry about the bouncer, sounds like you might’ve been scammed, especially since it’s a .com not a .co.uk

 

[PrettyInInk42]

kitty - Nah, you definitely look pg.

PL - Glad to hear you were able to have such a nice unique experience. Yay for DH.

shae - That's exciting. FX it doesn't take long for you to join the mommy club.
And I was never a big clubber, but I definitely enjoyed going out with friends and getting trashed. No more of that for a while. -.- lol

Jez - Yay for a new nephew. FX the bouncer arrives soon though. :/

AFM, SO and I are pretty actively house hunting. We saw 3 places tonight and were kinda considering making an offer on one, but there are still a couple other properties we wanna see. We're seeing one tomorrow that I'm pretty hopeful about.
Also, on Friday, I found out one of my aunts passed away. She lived kinda far away and we weren't that close, but I was actually able to see her last summer after not seeing her for years, so that was nice. She was 76 and a smoker, but she's at peace now.
Otherwise, not much else to report. The boys are a wee bit under the weather, but still adorable af.

 

[Flueky88]

Kitty you look prego, not fat. Very jealous of how cute your bump is. Mine was lumpy from my already fat belly lol

Shae I'm glad SO is getting a bit of baby fever. The light at the end of the tunnel is drawing near.

Pretty I love your new hair cut. Especially when curly. Omg he's sooo tall for 3 months!! I'm glad you guys are getting serious about buying a house

Jez it does sound like it might be a scam unfortunately. Grrr! How's Tilly?

Fern I'm so sorry for the rollercoaster he's putting you through.

Sorry if I missed someone, just trying to quickly "catch up".

 

[DobbyForever]

Just popping in today I was a big clubbed and we always went to gay clubs to avoid sleazy men lol

 

[kittykat7210]

I’m ridiculously smaller this pregnancy, nearly 25 weeks and still not gaining, midwife was beyond useless and did nothing about my concerns regarding tiny bump and lack of appetite/weight gain

 

[shaescott]

Kitty have you had an ultrasound recently to confirm baby is growing steadily? If not, is there a way to request one or ask to see a physician or a different midwife?

 

[kittykat7210]

Kitty have you had an ultrasound recently to confirm baby is growing steadily? If not, is there a way to request one or ask to see a physician or a different midwife?

had an ultrasound about 5 weeks ago, baby was small but they said they weren’t worried, no other midwives in my area, no way to request anything unfortunately, my midwife has to order everything, I’ll have to wait for the next appointment for her to measure my bump, but she doesn’t do it right anyway, there’s always a very visible gap between my bump and the tape measure, unless she’s got better since my last pregnancy. I’ve measured my own bump and it’s 20-21cm which for nearly 25 weeks isn’t very good, well below the lowest line on my chart but evidently measurements don’t start until 28 weeks. I did request a Doppler check from her though, which she did and it was 155-160bpm which is fine. And I am feeling movements, i just don’t think she’s growing properly but Ill have to wait 4 weeks to see how she measures me, if I measure under the bottom line (which I should if she does it properly) I’ll automatically get a scan. Having already paid £400 for a NIPT scan just before Christmas hubby isn’t happy to spend another ~£75-£100 on a another scan if we can avoid it. We’ve had a lot of big purchases recently (new car, NIPT and the TV broke so had to replace that) so our bank account isn’t brilliantly healthy hence the reluctance on his part.

it’s difficult to know what to do, even if I say I have reduced movements they’ll only put me on a monitor and not actually scan me which won’t tell me anything about her growth which is what I’m actually worried about.

 

[shaescott]

Kitty I think if you’re really worried first step is to call your midwife and very firmly tell her that you’re concerned about baby’s size, that you’re much smaller than last pregnancy and you want a scan ASAP. If you can’t get through to her, then I think it would be worth it to spend the money on the scan. Is your fundus/top of uterus up to your belly button yet?

 

[kittykat7210]

Kitty I think if you’re really worried first step is to call your midwife and very firmly tell her that you’re concerned about baby’s size, that you’re much smaller than last pregnancy and you want a scan ASAP. If you can’t get through to her, then I think it would be worth it to spend the money on the scan. Is your fundus/top of uterus up to your belly button yet?

Yeh it’s about level with it.

 

[Flueky88]

Kitty I'm sorry you feel your concerns aren't being acknowledged and addressed. Hopefully it's just because you are petite. S is pretty petite. She is around 50th percentile for weight last time I checked. She's a bit short though. Dr isn't concerned with her growth as she's meeting milestones quickly! She is walking well at 11 months, turns pages, feeds herself, saying mama, dada, hello, bye bye, and uh oh. She amazes me

 

[shaescott]

Yeh it’s about level with it.

I’ve seen different models about fundal height but some show 24 weeks as just above the belly button so maybe things are on track and you’re just carrying differently? Did you have a different starting weight or level of muscle tone?

 

[kittykat7210]

Thanks flueks, I know I shouldn’t panic so much but as it stands I’ll be birthing a <5lb baby at 40 weeks which scares the shit out of me!!

shae im slightly heavier than I was last pregnancy but not massively so, it’s mainly the fundal height being so small that scares me, Evie always measured right on track for 7lb according to my chart when I measured, which is what she was, this time baby is measuring to be <5lbs!

 

[Flueky88]

I never had fundal height checked before 28 weeks but I measured a week behind with both girls. Hopefully, your fundal height will increase a good bit by 28 weeks. Not sure if it helps but V was 5lb 13 oz. She was big for a preemie and S was 6lb 4 oz at full term.

 

[shaescott]

Kitty hm I’d say if there’s no way you can get a scan without the midwife, wait until you’re 28 weeks (I know, hard to wait) and measure again. If you’re way behind at that point, I’d go get a private scan. In the mean time, just make sure baby stays active (I think you said you were feeling movements regularly?) and keep up on nutrition etc. All you can really do, I think.

 

[DobbyForever]

That’s so crazy to me that you can’t get a scan. I know America’s healthcare is a global, and rightfully so, joke but wtf.

i know it’s hard not to panic. I’m glad you have some reassurances. Aiden was small. It definitely sucked the first year feeding wise, but people are SHOCKED when I tell them he was only 5lbs, and a low 5, at birth.

Biggest hugs

 

[wookie130]

How frustrating, Kitty. This baby does look like she's lying lower in your pelvis, based just on what I can judge from the picture comparison... but honestly, your maternal intuition matters her, and if you feel her growth needs investigating further, they should be obliging you.

Good luck! Hopefully little girl starts growing a bit more, and puts your mind at ease.